"It has been. It's quiet and comfortable here."
"How did your siblings fair?"
"Just fine. Ellie texted me this morning to say that Daniel and Robert went grocery shopping yesterday and she cleaned up the house so that I won't be stressed when I came home. They're growing into themselves," I said.
"They are."
"And they don't need me as much."
"That's part of the growing."
"I think this year I'll do Christmas with them. We don't usually do any holidays, but Thanksgiving was nice. Will you come if I do that?"
"Of course." She made to say more, but an intense knock at the front door made us both jump. I rubbed her arm before standing.
"I'll get it," I said, keeping her behind me as we made our way to the door.
"You know I answer the door by myself when you're not here, right?" she said and I smirked.
"When I'm here, I keep us safe." I glanced to my sidearm propped on my purse on the end table, before looking through the peephole. On the other side stood the dark-haired, green-eyed sister of my girlfriend. Unlike last time, she appeared put together, her hands in the pockets of her jacket. I glanced to Mira, my brows lifting. "It's Sedona."
Mira's brow narrowed immediately. "Don't answer it."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes. Come over here." She tugged me away from the door, and we both looked at the secured chain.
Another knock sounded and I bit my bottom lip as my heart warred with my brain. I wanted her to go away, to leave Mira in peace, but part of me softened at the notion that this was Mira's sister, and I remembered what Mikey told me about how she found Mira after…
"Baby, are you sure?"
"Yes." Mira's lips pursed, and her resolve hardened.
"Mimi, I know you're there. Please open the door," called Sedona. "I just want to talk."
Mira's grip on my hand tightened, holding me in place. I lay my free hand on her stomach and watched as war waged inside her just the same.
"Go away, Sedona," she called back. "I'm not talking to you."
"I'm sorry, Mimi. Please just talk to me."
"No."
"Please, Mimi." Sedona's voice cracked and I looked up at Mira whose lips curved into a frown.
"Maybe you should, baby…" I placed my hand in the center of her chest. "If she gets out of control, I'll handle her."
"No. She can deal with the consequences of acting like an asshole." Mira spoke loud enough for Sedona to hear.
"I was an asshole. I'm sorry, Mimi. I was out of my head." A soft thud hit the door and Mira started, but in my mind's eye, I imagined Sedona resting her head against it.
"Are you afraid of her, Mira?" I whispered my question and tentative eyes met mine. "I won't let her near you."
"I don't want her near you," she said, her voice soft.
"Well, you keep her away from me and I'll keep her away from you. Deal?"
Mira nodded, and her grip on me loosened.
"Also, I'm not wearing any pants," I said, gesturing down myself.
"It covers you like a dress. Do you have panties?"
"Yes."
She nodded toward the door, and unlocked the deadbolt, leaving the chain as I pulled the door open. Sedona stood there with red-ringed eyes and tears on her cheeks. I surveyed her, assessing her level of anger. At first, she didn't say anything, but she wiped her face.
"If you lash out, I'm arresting you," I warned her, and she nodded.
"Okay."
"Okay." I closed the door to release the chain while still holding Mira's hand, then opened it to allow Sedona inside.
Mira held me tight as I moved back to her side. Sedona appeared much more put together today, with her hair down like Mira's and in a similar leggings and sweater combination with an overcoat.
"Thanks," she said, her voice soft.
"What do you want?" Mira tugged me closer, and I slid my arm around her waist in a possessive grab.
"To apologize," she began. The two of them stood eye-to-eye and their physical similarities unnerved me. Sedona was slightly thicker than Mira, but other than that, their resemblance belonged to that of fraternal twins at least. "I'm sorry for how I acted. I didn't mean it the way it came out."
"It came out pretty clear to me, Sedona. You don't approve of my relationship with Billie. You accused her of brainwashing me, and discounted my feelings for her as a means of destroying my life. It was pretty damn clear what you meant." Mira's hold on me remained steadfast and I let her do whatever she needed. "You can leave."
"I was just worried about you, Mira. I am worried." Sedona didn't rise to Mira's anger this time. "But I didn't mean to blame Billie."
"Suddenly you're a bigot and a homophobe to boot. So you can just go," Mira continued, nodding toward the door. "And I'm not stupid. I'm tired of you calling me stupid every time you're angry at me."
"Mimi, please." Sedona pulled her gaze away from Mira to me. "I'm sorry. I'm not a bigot or a homophobe. I'm just…I was—"
"You were wasted and angry," I filled in for her.
"That, too." Sedona sniffled, her gaze flickering to the floor. "I apologize to both of you. I shouldn't have done that."
"No. You shouldn't have." Mira's grip on me loosened a fraction. "I love Billie, Sedona. Who are you to question who I love? My sexuality? What do you even know about me as an adult?"
"Mimi, I don't claim to—" Sedona held up her hands the same way Mira does when she's frustrated.
"You've been essentially out of my life since Declan died and I moved here. An occasional 'hey you're still alive' visit isn't being in someone's life. How do you know that Billie isn't my first girlfriend? How do you know that I haven't hid a child from you?" Mira's angry, narrowed brow surprised me, but I understood her intensity. Sedona remained quiet so Mira continued. "You don't know, do you?"
"No," said Sedona, her voice soft. "I'm sorry, Mimi. I don't know what else to say."
Mira's fingers twitched in mine as her firmness began to falter a smidge. "I heard you. I'm not ready to accept your apology, Sedona. I'm not ready to be in the same room as you." Her voice cracked and she said, "You're supposed to be my sister. Supposed to have my back." Mira's eyes welled with tears, dampening her endless lashes. "I showed up at Thanksgiving proud of who I was becoming, proud of the woman I loved, and you spoiled that." She cleared her throat. "But I'm not giving you that much power, Sedona. I'm not ready to accept your apology."
Thick tears tumbled down Sedona's cheeks, taking her eyeliner with it. "I'm so sorry, Mimi." She turned her attention to me. "I'm sorry for treating you the way I did."
I nodded, fighting the tightness in my throat as Mira's hand in mind began to shake. "Thank you," I said, stroking my thumb against her palm. "I love your sister. I would appreciate if you would be supportive of her choices."
"I will be." Sedona sniffled, looking from me to Mira. "I am."
Mira nodded then looked at me, her bottom lip quivering as the battle to keep a tight hold on her feelings wavered. I hugged her and she buried her face against my shoulder. Sedona sobbed once, covering her face in a gesture that once again mirrored her sister's.
I kissed Mira's cheek and she sniffled, leaning back to meet her sister's gaze when they both calmed down after a moment. "I think you should go," she said.
Sedona nodded, dabbing at her eyes with her sleeves. "I love you, Mimi."
"I love you, too, but I'm really mad at you right now," Mira said, clearing her throat again.
Sedona let out a shaky breath and nodded. "I'll go."
Mira let go of me and allowed me to walk her sister to the door.
"Where's your husband?" I asked.
"Downstairs waiting in the car," she said, choking on her emotions as she entered the hall. "I'm sorry, Billie."
"I know. She needs time," I said. I wasn't quite ready to forgive her for how she treated Mira either. Part of me didn't care how she treated me, but to hurt someone I loved was another stor
y.
"Yeah." Sedona took a deep breath before turning to head down the hall. "Bye."
"Bye." I watched her go, then returned to Mira who now sat on the sofa. She leaned her elbow on the back of it, and sniffled while resting her head on her hand. When she didn't look up at me, I scooted closer in tiny skips until it made her smirk under her tears. My knee pressed against her thigh and she dropped her hand to squeeze it.
"You okay, baby?" I asked and she nodded.
"When she calls me stupid…" Mira hid her mouth against her palm and closed her eyes for a moment. "That hurts almost as much as her assault on you."
I ran my fingers through her hair. "It's ironic because you are the literal least stupid person I've ever met in my entire life. Genius doesn't do you justice. What is your I.Q.? Two-hundred?"
She laughed softly, and gave me a shove. "No. One-seventy."
I stared at her, my eyes widening. "Really? Wasn't Einstein around that?"
"Yeah, but nowadays it's not so remarkable."
"Mira! It is so." I cupped her face in my palms and forced her to look at me. "You're remarkable."
Her eyes shimmered as she surveyed me, as if hunting for my truth.
"You know, when we were hanging out with your soccer friends, I understood what you meant about not having anything in common with them," I told her, placing a gentle kiss on her forehead. The gesture seemed to soothe her and she stroked my arms. "Some of them are shallow thinkers. They're impressed that you're a physicist, but they can't handle hearing about any of it. I understand why you don't talk about work or what you do and how sometimes I have to pry it out of you."
"Yeah. They just…laugh it off. Not in a mean way, but dismissive." She let out a laugh, though it wasn't one of amusement. "Like everything else in my life has ever been, Billie. Declan dismissed me, showed no interest. My friends. You've met my family, they placate. Except Mikey, he's okay. My whole life, no one has cared about me the way I would like them to."
"Let me tell you something, Mira Lewis." I took both of her hands in mine. "I am interested in you. I am interested in what you do. I'm interested to learn about what you love. I want to know everything about you. If I could crawl inside your head and roll around in your thoughts and knowledge, I would do it. You interest me, Mira. You've interested me from the moment I first laid eyes on you."
Tears tumbled down her cheeks, but the way she looked at me, how she hung on my every word, set off a wave of tingles over my flesh. I could almost see the brain changes happening as Mira processed what I said to her, and I imagined neural connections changing and shifting.
"I want to hear about your day. And sit in on your classes. And go to the science museum, and talk about quantum consciousness. I want that. I want all of that and I want all of you. Do you hear the words I'm saying?"
She nodded as she sobbed, a small smile curving her lips.
"Do you feel them, baby?" I released one of her hands to place my palm between her breasts. She nodded and held my hand to her. "I mean every word of it."
Mira pressed her lips to mine and I returned her firm, warm kiss. When we parted, she turned around and picked up a book on the coffee table called, The Quantum Enigma. She fingered through it, pulled out a folded piece of paper, then handed it to me.
"I was going to surprise you later." She swiped at her eyes while I unfurled the paper.
A smile broke out across my face when I saw the tickets to the planetarium. "They're for today."
"Yeah." She watched me, wringing her hands in her lap. "You said you wanted to go back…"
"I do, baby." I grinned and climbed into her lap to straddle her thighs. Her hands fell to my hips when I kissed her quickly.
"It's two things. First a presentation on human thought experiments, then a simulated visit to the moon. Are you really sure you like this?" she asked as I laced my fingers behind her neck.
"Mira, I would love to go to the planetarium with you. I meant it the first time I said it, and I mean it now." I tapped her bottom lip with my index finger. "I like learning. I like physics and philosophy and outer space and The X-Files. I liked it before I met you, and now I love it because of you."
"I love you," she said, smiling despite her tears. "So much."
"I love you, too." I stroked her cheeks and kissed her all over her face. "We better get ready. The tickets are for an hour from now."
"Shower together?" A slow grin melted over her lips.
"You know it."
Chapter Twenty
"Why does Donovan keep talking to you in private, Billie?" Angelina asked as we headed home after a crime scene in downtown Seattle. "Every time, you come back looking worse for wear."
"I'm not ready to talk about it yet, but when I am I will," I told her, glancing at her as she drove us through the busy streets.
"Acceptable. Have our coworkers been annoying you?"
"A little. Calling me The Legend is a little ridiculous over something that happened by accident." I laughed faintly and she joined me in it. "Not funny."
"It's a little amusing. Are you too famous to have a drink with us tonight? We haven't hung out much."
"I know. I'm not used to balancing a relationship, my siblings, and work. I've neglected you."
"Ah, I'll get over it." She shoved my shoulder. "Sorensen told me you switched on-call weekends with him. Are you and Mira going away?"
I nodded. "To Dax Stocker's place again. I need time away from here to think."
"Makes sense. So…am I taking you home or to Jimmy's?"
"Jimmy's. It's still early. We'll paperwork tomorrow."
"My kind of gal."
Spending time with Angelina and the guys from work was fun for the first hour, though by the time seven rolled around, my thoughts lingered on my siblings and Mira. Dinner last night with Eleanor and Robert soothed some of my worries about them, but not much.
I headed home around eight to find the usual scenario of late. Daniel and Robert played loud videogames while Riley and Eleanor sat at the kitchen table with books laid out in front of them. All four of them received a smooch on the cheek from me before I joined the duo at the table.
"What's everyone working on?" I asked them.
"Final paper for me before break," said Eleanor, snatching a brownie from the plate in front of her.
"How about you, Riley?" I asked, helping myself to a brownie as well then pausing. "There's no pot in these, right?" That drew nearly everyone's attention and heavy laughter ensued.
"Billie!" squealed Eleanor. "You know I hate the idea of drugs."
"You swear?" I narrowed my eyes and looked between her and Riley.
"She swears. We made them together," said Riley.
"Okay." I took a bite. "I trust you."
They both giggled at me. "So what you working on, Riley?"
"Catching up on calculus. It's my weakest subject," he said.
"Mine, too. Maybe my brain has expanded since hanging out with Mira."
"I don't think sex makes math osmosis into your head," Eleanor said, snickering the entire time. Riley burst out laughing and it made me do just the same.
"Oh, you're in trouble now. I'm taking my credit card off those food delivery apps."
"Beej!" Ellie swatted my hand and she cracked up. "You're funny tonight."
"I try. You made these brownies? They're good," I said, helping myself to another.
"Yes, but from a box." Eleanor set her pencil down and lifted up her laptop to inspect it.
"What happened?"
"It overheats."
"Is it old?"
"A little."
"We'll get you a new one for school," I said, leaning back in my chair and propping my feet up. "Any plans for the weekend, folks?"
"Work," called Robert.
"Also work," added Daniel.
"Nope," said Riley, looking to Eleanor. "Except hanging at the salon on Saturday while you and Finn work."
"You help. Jordan is teaching you stuff.
" Eleanor elbowed him. "Other than that, Olivia invited us all to her house, but it's in Grays Harbor County. Can I go?"
"You mean can you spend the weekend on the property where two of my detective coworkers live, an Army veteran, an ex-detective, and two FBI agents? Absolutely. Couldn't think of a safer place to hang out in the entire country," I said, keeping my tone dry.
Eleanor stared at me. "For real? That's who lives there?"
"Yes." I laughed hard at her expression. "Olivia's dad is a detective and her uncle is on my team at work. Both cops. The rest are aunts and family members. So have at it, sweet girl. Hang out there all you like."
Eleanor looked to Riley. "Did you know that?"
"Kinda." He shrugged, laughing with it. "They all seem normal to me."
"Who's gonna drive?" I asked.
"Me," offered Riley. "If that's okay."
"I trust you driving, but Ellie, you can have my car if you want. Mira and I are going to Sequim again for the weekend. We can take hers."
"I can drive later…" She looked to Riley, her brows flicking up and down. "What do you think?"
"Done!" Riley laughed and Eleanor leaned over to kiss his cheek. The blush that melted over his features warmed my insides. They were absolutely adorable.
"So, Beej. A month from today I'll be moving into the dorms. Are you going to miss me?" teased Eleanor, so I grabbed her into a rough hug. She giggled and returned my embrace.
"I am, nugget. This place has been so lively since you've been here. Robert and I were pretty boring."
"If I hate it, can I come back?"
"Yup. I'll scoop you up like I did last time," I agreed. "But I think you'll enjoy it."
"As long as she doesn't have a terrible roommate," said Riley. "Otherwise it will be great."
"I think it'll be okay," said Ellie, her attitude positively positive. "I get along with everyone mostly."
"You do." I smiled while I listened to her and Riley chat about their futures.
In the back of my mind, the image of the folder with the FBI emblem haunted me like it had all week. I hadn't read it or addressed it again since the night in Donovan's car. I would though, after I talked to Dax and Mira. And then, my siblings.
I toyed with my phone while half the room returned to homework, the other half to videogames. For graduate students, the other two seemed to have plenty of free time on a Thursday night.
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