The Moore the Merrier

by Alex Miska

  Chance grinned. “Deal. Now, which of you is Jackson and which is Dean?”

  The one who seemed to speak for the both of them said, “I’m Jackson, he’s Dean.”

  A hand shoved Chance between the shoulder blades, and he half fell onto the boys. “Just hug them already, Chester!” Julian said, his voice laden with exasperation and eyerolls. So Chance hugged each of the boys and they, thank God, hugged him back.

  Dean poked his head over Chance’s shoulder and gave Logan a little wave.

  “Oh! I’m sorry. This is Logan, my boyfriend,” Chance told them.

  “Hi,” Jackson said as his mute twin gave another shy wave. One of their tummies rumbled, and Logan jumped into action.

  “Come in! Sit down. Have you eaten lunch? Let me get you something,” Logan bustled them over to the stools around one of the tables. “Do you want to see a menu? Or, no, you don’t need a menu. I can make you a sandwich or we have soup or just this once you can have cake for a meal; I think this is a special occasion after all.”

  “He makes the best grilled cheese,” Julian said, stopping Logan’s torrent of helpfulness.

  “Actually… um… a grilled cheese sounds really good,” Dean said so quietly they could barely hear him.

  “I’d like to have cake or cookies or something like that. What do you have? Oh, this is a bakery. I guess I should be more specific. Umm…” Jackson trailed off.

  They were too cute. Chance didn’t know what to say, but he was grinning like a fool and trying not to grovel at their feet… He knew eventually he’d break down and cry and apologize for not being there when they needed him. But right now, they just needed to be comfortable.

  “Logan, why don’t you make Dean a sandwich?” Chance suggested. “Jackson, do you want to go out front to choose something or a few somethings? We can bring stuff home with us too. And there’s a cake for dinner. Well, not for dinner, for dessert. But I’m not sure if you guys want to go to Sunday dinner… it’s at Logan’s parents’ house, so there will be a lot of people and probably a lot of hugging and… well, you met everybody at the Halloween party, right? So maybe you’d be up for a home cooked meal? Or we could get takeout. Logan was thinking you might want to go shopping first to get whatever you might need, like clothes and bedding and stuff and…”

  “Let’s concentrate on lunch first, Chance,” Xander said. “You and I can take Jackson out front, and Logan and Julian can work on the grilled cheese for Dean.”

  So Chance took Jackson out front, and the boy chose enough food to last him a few meals. Chance kept his hand between Jackson’s shoulder blades, hoping it was a reassuring gesture. Amelia ran around the counter and gave Jackson a big hug, welcoming him to the family. He turned red and stammered an unintelligible greeting into her bosom. She just laughed and handed him a tray covered with pastries.

  Before they returned to the kitchen, Jackson asked, “Umm… Logan’s face…”

  Ahhh yes, the icing stripes. Chance whispered conspiratorially, “Shhh. It took me hours to sneak it on him. I’m trying to see how long he’ll walk around like that.”

  His brother grinned and nodded before entering the room with a little more confidence than he’d had a moment before. When they returned, Logan and Julian were telling Dean all about Luna and the cats.

  “Oh yeah,” Xander said. “We dropped Cassius off at your place. He’ll probably be fine.” Chance didn’t need Xander to say that he hoped they’d find Cassius hiding in the tub instead of under the bed or in a kitchen cabinet, which were both a pain in the neck to get him out of. For no apparent reason, the big dog was terrified of Logan’s cats.

  “Did you drop off your bags?” Chance asked Jackson, who shook his head and looked at his feet.

  “We… didn’t want to assume… I mean, you don’t have to…”

  “Of course I want you to stay with me. And we’ll talk about bringing Gigi home with us too. There are two bedrooms upstairs, and you’ll have your own bathroom.”

  “I have a list!” Logan added.

  “And he has a list of all the stuff you two might need or want.” Chance said. “But… if you decide you’re not comfortable staying with me…”

  “I have a list for that too!” Logan said, surprising Chance (although there was absolutely no reason for him to be surprised). “My parents would want you to stay with them.”

  “Or you could stay with us,” Julian said. “We have spare rooms too.”

  “Dani also said that you could stay with her and Greg. She’s my best friend; I met her when I first moved here after…”

  “After Dad was a cunt?” Dean said, surprising everyone. Clearly, when the boy finally spoke above a whisper, he had some very strong opinions. Not that anyone in that room would disagree. “What? We’re all thinking it. By the way, our names are totally your fault.”

  “You know Dad would have given you terrible names even if I hadn’t turned out gay,” Chance argued. “He did that to me too, and I remember it being horrible but I can’t quite… Gigi is short for…”

  “Gertrude Gladys,” Jackson said.

  “See? None of us got out scot free,” Chance attempted to reassure them. “And what are your middle names?”

  “They’re worse than our first names,” Dean said morosely. Logan slid two sandwiches onto his plate, and Jackson took that as his cue to dig into a red velvet mini-cake.

  “I’m Axle Truman, and he’s Diesel Manley,” Jackson said before shoveling another giant bite into his mouth.

  It took them a moment.

  “True man. Truman. Get it?” Dean explained, a little bit of teenage exasperation in his voice. “Ugh. Our names are like a bad joke.”

  Julian snickered, Chance and Logan laughed outright, but Xander was able to keep a straight face.

  “Now, I know my mom was also a twat,” Chance said, feeling free now to call terrible parents by terrible names, “but where’s yours?”

  “Died having us, if you can believe that. It’s a new millennium! Who dies in childbirth these days?” Jackson told them. “Anyway, she came from a very strict Mormon family somewhere in the Midwest. They disowned her for marrying a Catholic, and we’ve never met them. And our other grandparents…”

  “Try a cookie,” Chance told him, partially changing the subject. “Then you’ll know for sure you’ll be happy here with me.”

  Jackson took a bite and closed his eyes in pleasure.

  “Logan is like Grandmother’s complete opposite when it comes to food. Or anything, really,” Chance explained. “By the way… what the he- heck, Xander! You said they were identical twins!”

  He squinted hard at the boys. Now that they were sitting next to each other, he realized that they looked nothing alike. Everyone looked at Chance as though he was insane.

  “I mean… Clearly, there’s a family resemblance. Same eyes, same hair, same chin, same body type, but other than that?”

  Still, silence reigned.

  “What?”

  “We are identical,” Jackson said around a mouthful of cookie. “Only Gigi can tell us apart.”

  Chance wrinkled his nose. “Okaaay. I mean, I won’t ask for a DNA test but… really?”

  “He’s not always this slow,” Logan said. “But I love him anyway.” Chance considered sniping back, but the red and green stripes of icing were statement enough, so he just crossed the room and gave him a peck on the lips. Then he froze. Did this make his brothers uncomfortable? But they both awwwed.

  The room then fell into an awkward silence. All the adults stood and watched the boys devour all the food in front of them, while Jackson and Dean were clearly waiting for one of the adults to take the lead.

  “How about we all take the boys over to your place?” Xander suggested. “They can look it over, meet Luna and the cats, drop their stuff off, and then decide where to go from there.”

  “Where we’re going from there is to the mall,” Logan said deci
sively. “Are those the only coats you have?”

  “It was hot out when we left Boston,” Jackson mumbled defensively, and Chance immediately felt overwhelmed with guilt and horror that they’d been alone so long. He hugged both boys from behind.

  “I’m so sorry. I will never forgive myself for not being available to come get you in August. There are no words to ex-”

  “You can’t forgive yourself for getting the crap beaten out of you by a psycho?!” Dean asked, suddenly angry. “Dad’s the douche that hurt us. Grandmother and Grandfather are the ones who turned their backs on us. We’re the ones who didn’t tell anyone your name. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

  “If I’d listened to everyone and not gone out jogging…” Chance argued.

  “Then that twat would still have been breathing down your neck while we were living with you. And you and Logan weren’t exactly doing great and us being around would have totally wrecked your relationship,” Dean said. “It had to happen this way.”

  “You Blevinses are so full of shit!” Julian exclaimed. “Chester, getting attacked wasn’t your fault. Stop blaming yourself. And you two… are you seriously saying you had to wait three months to meet him?! If you’d met him as soon as we brought you to Safe Harbor, their relationship would have been fine. Hell, they’re so in love they’d have been fine anyway. I mean, what the fuck, people?! Now come on. Everyone put on your coats. We’re going home and rescuing Cassius from Logan’s demon cats.”

  Julian swooped his coat over his shoulders and walked out.

  After allowing a moment of dramatic silence, Xander snickered and clapped his hands. “You heard the brat! Let’s go!”

  Character Guide

  Michelangelo watched Cassius and Luna run around like lunatics and smiled inwardly. He and Leo had discussed Luna’s need for more silly doggie-time; such behavior was beneath the felines. Luna would have been able to play with Cassius anytime, but the silly, hat-wearing dog had stopped visiting. That was possibly their fault; it had made them upset when Cassius tried to snuggle with their dog, and they’d had to put him in his place. They’d never expected him to be such a wimp, to freak out over a paw to the nose! At least he showed a little respect now.

  It was nice to live in this big house, especially with its high perches where they could survey their territory and oversee all activities. Having Luna to protect and her Chance to pet them was definitely a nice bonus. Mikey wasn’t so sure he’d like these Chance-boy-pups though. They’d better be cat people. And if they tried to spray water on him, he’d definitely pounce on them while they slept; sleep-pouncing gave an immediate reaction and was far more satisfying than pooping in shoes, but Mikey was prepared to do both if the situation warranted it.

  When Luna got tired, he and Leo hopped down to the couch to cuddle with her. Cassius hid behind the chair so they couldn’t sneak up on him while he slept this time. Mikey briefly considered feeling guilty over that, but it was too funny, so he purred in satisfaction instead. Leo shot him a dirty look before settling his head back down on their Luna; he was a little more tender-hearted than Mikey.

  Before they knew it, Luna bounded off the couch and ran into the foyer (it was so nice to finally have a foyer). Mikey and Leo shared a meaningful glance and bounded up to eye-level perches, which both asserted their dominance and allowed people to pay proper obeisance. Sure enough, Cassius hadn’t outright lied; six male humans spilled into the living room. Chance began giving the two unknown males a tour, telling them obvious things such as ‘here is the bathroom’ and ‘here is the kitchen.’ Ugh. If these males couldn’t recognize kitchens and bathrooms, that meant it would be up to him and Leo to housebreak them. They all traveled up to the funny-smelling rooms and Mikey heard two thuds. Either the new males dropped dead from the smell of the carpets, or they had put down their backpacks.

  Finally –FINALLY– all the humans came back down, and Logan introduced everyone. “Boys, these are Chance’s brothers, Jackson and Dean. They’re going to live with us now, so you’d better be nice to them.”

  Well, that settled that. Cassius had also been honest about the boy-humans living here and that the humans thought they were Chance’s brothers. The two young males stepped forward to greet them. They looked alike, and Mikey was curious if that meant they also acted the same, a curiosity that was quickly satisfied. One boy-human stood back and just looked them over, while the other asked their names and gave Mikey his hand to sniff before petting him, as was proper. That whiff told him everything he needed to know: this pup belonged to Chance. He also pet very well, with firm, long strokes; he and Leo wouldn’t have to teach this boy-person too much. When he moved to Leo, his mirror person came forward carefully and acted as his brother had, but he seemed more anxious, and Mikey had to pet himself on the mirror’s hand. Oh well, he could work with that.

  Of course, then the second boy-human had to spoil it by asking, “Where’s Cassius?”

  ‘Really?’ Mikey asked in disgust, causing the boy to startle. Humans always seemed surprised the first time he talked to them. Of course, Siamese were far more conversational than most cats, so he and Leo understood the confusion.

  Leo must have felt guilty, because he leapt from his perch and pounced on the back of the armchair, which caused Cassius to yelp from behind it. ‘Chill,’ Leo told the dog. Both boys then knelt on the floor and tried to coax Cassius out. ‘See, the people are here. You’re safe.’

  When Cassius didn’t move, Mikey gave in and spoke up, ‘We promised not to hurt you. Come on out, wuss.’ His words had the desired effect; Cassius slowly crept out and, tail down, scrambled over to Julian’s side. Julian straightened the dog’s ridiculous hat and asked Cassius what the ‘mean, old cats’ did to him. (Old! They were younger than Cassius!) And Cassius told him all about the truce.

  The confident boy-person pet Leo and thanked him for his help, as he lifted Leo up into his arms. Oh! The indignity of being carried! The boy sat down with him on the floor. Mikey jumped up onto a higher perch to remain safe from such impertinence but Leo, damn him, just curled up in the boy’s lap and purred. The boy whispered endearments, and Leo told him, ‘You’re good people. But you and your brother smell a lot alike, so I apologize in advance if I accidentally poop in your shoe.’

  ‘Let’s not be hasty,’ Mikey warned Leo. After all, even their Logan had required a shoe-pooping once.

  ‘I’m not lying. If it ever comes to that, you will be the one to administer justice,’ Leo said. ‘By the way, I call dibs. This boy’s mine. You can have the other one.’

  ‘Fine.’ At least that one showed the cats proper deference and didn’t pick them up willy-nilly. Leo purred in satisfaction that he got his way but, although Mikey had accepted the bargain, he wasn’t ready for lap-sitting yet. ‘Luna, sweetie, could you keep his lap warm for me? I need to observe.’

  ‘Sure!’ she said and dove into his lap, ever eager to be helpful. She even gave the lap a good sniff before lying down. ‘Cassius! He does belong to Chance! Woohoo! More people! This is awesome!’

  Michelangelo trusted her nose, but would take his time before deciding how ‘awesome’ this new development was.

  Xander, Julian, and Logan sat on the couch and Chance considered taking the armchair before sitting on the floor with the boys. Watching their people interact with these boy-pups was truly fascinating. The confident one –Leo’s boy, now– was quiet, his shoulders slightly hunched, and only seemed to talk to Leo and Luna, while the mirror-boy –Mikey’s boy– sat up straight and was less hesitant to join in people-conversation. It was as though their true confidence was the opposite of their people-confidence. Mikey was a little proud of his boy for being able to feign that level of confidence. He was warming up to him until his boy claimed Leo’s boy wanted to be a VETERINARIAN!

  Hell, no.

  Mikey did his best to seem nonchalant as he quickly jumped to the highest perch he could reach, above anywhere even Logan could gra
b him. Leo followed him up at a leisurely pace and Mikey was jealous that his brother was so much better at acting casual.

  Ha! No veterinarians for them. Mikey didn’t relax until their men and boys stood up and clipped leashes onto Cassius and Luna.

  ‘Be safe!’ Mikey called after Luna. He hated it when she left, but he had to stay strong and trust his Logan to take care of her.

  ‘She’ll be fine, right?’ Leo asked him anxiously.

  ‘Don’t worry. She always comes back happy.’ Mikey nuzzled his brother, infusing his posture and voice with confidence. They both looked down at the now-empty living room. ‘Ummm, Leo? How do we get down from here?’

  Character Guide

  Jackson clutched his twin’s hand as they sat in the far back row of Julian’s SUV (seriously, how many dogs was the guy planning on carting around with him?). Dean was calmer and Jackson wished, as he had a lot over the past several months, that they could take turns being ‘the optimistic one.’ But Dean wore rose-colored glasses 24/7, so it was up to Jackson to be realistic.

  So Jackson tried to keep himself from creating a fantasy by reminding himself of all the ways this was going to go wrong. The twins were just two random kids that happened to be partially related to Chance through a man Chance hated. They were expensive and noisy and inconvenient; they needed to be driven everywhere and got sick and hurt, and Jackson ate everything in sight, and Dean always left his shoes in the middle of the hall for people to trip on… Every friend and family member of Chance’s would wear those smiles and be nice to them, because that was the kind of people they were, but every single one of them knew that they were a pain-in-the-ass burden, leeching off their half-brother because their father had failed at fatherhood yet again.

  Of course, reminding himself of all of that wasn’t very helpful. If they could have picked any family in the history of families that they could magically become part of, it would have been Julian’s. The more Chance’s giant boyfriend (why couldn’t the twins be big, strong, masculine queers like him?) clucked over them like a mother hen and Chance talked about their house and their pets and how awesome life was going to be, the more Jackson could pretend reality didn’t exist. It wouldn’t hurt to believe in the fantasy for a little bit longer especially when, after an unnecessary three-block drive, they pulled in front of a home straight out of their dreams. It had two stories and a porch and a big front yard and even had a friggin’ white picket fence.