Cowboy in Wolf's Clothing

by Kait Ballenger

  “Wes said this asshole of a horse prefers when he rides bareback, but I’m not giving this bastard any leeway after how much he’s bitten me this week,” Colt had said. “I’d just as soon leave his ornery ass in his pen, but you saw the tantrum he pulled when he thought we’d take another horse over him.”

  Belle chuckled. There really was no winning with the mustang.

  “I’m never agreeing to watch that beast for Wes again,” Colt was saying as they entered the calving shed.

  A distressed-sounding moo interrupted him, and they both exchanged a knowing look as they picked up their pace. Heading to the end of the stalls, they found one of the cows lying in her fresh hay, making a horrible keening sound.

  “Who did the last check?” Belle asked.

  “I did.” Colt eased into the pen with her.

  She passed him one of the arm-length gloves, and he checked the cow’s progress. “She’s about at the same point she was before. I think the calf’s stuck.” He muttered curses under his breath.

  But Belle was already pulling on her own arm-length glove and easing past the stall gate. She moved past him. “Allow me.”

  Colt was crouched down beside the cow. “You think I haven’t done my fair share of getting one of these critters unstuck from the birth canal?”

  She shook her head. “No, but who would you rather have with an arm up your vagina? A cowboy or a trained physician?”

  “Neither.” He chuckled. “Not that I think she much cares either way.” He nodded to the ailing beast. “I’ll try to keep a good hold on her.”

  Belle eased down to the lower half of the cow’s body, checking what she could see from the outside.

  “I can’t believe you said the word ‘vagina,’” Colt muttered.

  Considering she was staring straight into the cow at the moment before reaching up to check the calf’s position, the comment struck her as ridiculous, even though she knew what he meant.

  “Don’t be such a jerk,” she said, laughing. “It’s a medically accurate term. Even I can say that.”

  “But not ‘pussy’?” he teased.

  Had she been in any other position, she likely would have blushed, but she was a bit preoccupied. “I did say it,” she said, but only under sexually delicious duress.

  The calf was hooked on the mother’s pubic bone. Once Belle reached its hooves, the mother could finish the delivery. Her hand wrapped around one of the calves’ ankles.

  “On three,” she said, counting down. “One. Two. Three.”

  She gave a hearty yank. The cow let out a long, distressed moo as the calf slid further down into the birth canal. Belle eased back. Already she could see the mother pushing to birth the calf.

  “You’re not half-bad at that,” Colt said as she stripped off her gloves.

  “There was a time when I considered being a veterinarian, but orthopedic surgery pays better.” She shrugged. “Plus, I have a softer spot for cowboys than I do for animals.”

  Colt grinned.

  They stayed a bit longer, waiting until the mother delivered her healthy calf before they put it under the heater to dry off, then checking on the others who were in the shed but hadn’t yet progressed into the full labor. When they finished their chores, they tried to rope Black Jack, but the horse wasn’t having a second of it. They ended up walking back in companionable silence as the first hints of the sun peeked over the mountain skyline. When they reached the cabin, Belle sat on the old bench porch swing and beckoned for Colt to sit down beside her. He did, and they sat together for a while watching as the sky started to light up with streaks of orange overcoming the deep, midnight blue.

  “It’s amazing, isn’t it?”

  “You mean the view?” he asked.

  She nodded, though when she glanced at him, she realized he hadn’t been looking at the sunrise. He’d been looking at her.

  Heat filled her cheeks, and she pulled her gaze away. “Yeah,” she said. “The sunrise, but I also meant the cattle giving birth. It may be messy and difficult, but every time I see it, there’s still something amazing about new life being brought into the world, don’t you think?”

  It was the truth, but she was also curious, feeling him out to get his impressions. She knew watching cattle deliver a calf wasn’t the same as a woman giving birth, especially if it was your own child, but she wanted to know what he thought about it all the same.

  “Yeah, I suppose it is.” He left it at that, and even though she’d agreed she wouldn’t unload the full truth on him until they’d gotten some rest, she couldn’t stop herself from pushing a bit further. “I’m assuming that means you want kids of your own someday?” He watched her from the corner of his eye.

  She grinned. “Oh yeah. Tons of them. A whole house full if I had my druthers.”

  He chuckled and leaned back into the seat, slinging an arm around her shoulders. “You know, even though you’re a Rogue, that doesn’t surprise me in the least.”

  She raised a brow. “And why is that?”

  “You like caring for others. That’s what makes you a good doctor, and it’s also why they’re all so crazy about you.” His gaze flicked to the doorway as if to indicate his soldiers. “For a Rogue, you sure do fit right in to pack life.”

  A deep ache opened in her chest, making her feel raw. “I’ve always wanted a pack,” she admitted.

  His gaze snapped toward her, and he looked a bit confused. “I thought you said you didn’t need anyone. That—”

  She shook her head. “I know I said that, but it wasn’t the truth. I said it to protect myself. A pack is the one thing I can never have, and I…” She struggled to speak around the lump in her throat. “If I pretended I didn’t want one, I thought that would make it hurt less.” She drew air into her lungs, yet somehow it hurt to breathe. “I guess that’s why I want such a big family. If I can’t have a pack, then maybe I can find another wolf to help start a pack of my own, you know?” She swallowed down the massive lump in her throat. “Do you want kids?”

  She knew it was unfair to ask when he had no idea what the question meant to her, but she couldn’t bring herself not to.

  “No.”

  The answer was short and curt.

  “My role as commander isn’t suited to it, so I’ve never considered it a possibility. A mate and a family would be a liability, something our enemies could exploit, and I wouldn’t want to put someone in that position. And well…I mean…you know the truth. I don’t think I could be with a woman who didn’t know, but if she did, then she…”

  “Then she wouldn’t be a Grey Wolf,” she finished for him.

  He’d never be with her. She’d known that from the moment he’d confessed his true identity, and she wasn’t about to ask him to leave his pack, the one thing she’d always longed for, and the only thing he’d ever had, in order to be with her, even if she was pregnant with his child. Even as much as that hurt.

  She couldn’t do that to him.

  “No.” He shook his head.

  When she didn’t look up at him, he gently gripped her chin. “Belle, look at me.”

  Her eyes were watering, filling up with tears, but she looked up anyway. When she did, what she saw there shocked her. His normally steely eyes were so soft and gray that they reminded her of rolling thunderclouds. “I was going to say because she wouldn’t be you.”

  Chapter 18

  Colt’s gaze fixated on her lips. One second, he had been thinking about capturing Belle’s lips with his own, and the next, her lips were on his, her mouth gentle and probing against the hardened set of his jaw. Her smooth, creamy skin brushed against the rough scratch of his whiskers. She had kissed him.

  Colt growled, a low and aroused grumble as he buried his hands in the soft tangle of curls at the nape of her neck. He wanted to draw that sweet tongue of hers deep into his mouth, tasting
until his cock throbbed with need and he lost himself enough to bury himself deep in the heat between her legs. But he couldn’t.

  He broke the kiss between them. Her breath came in short, ragged pants against his lips. His own breathing wasn’t much better.

  “Belle,” he purred. Their lips were so close, he could feel the tender flesh brush against him as he spoke. “Belle, you know we can’t do this again.”

  “Why not?” she pleaded, easing closer.

  The raw need in her tone shook him, causing the ever-growing ache in his cock to pulse. He leaned away from her, putting some much-needed distance between them. “You know we can’t be together. More than one night, and we both know we’ll get too wrapped up in this to want to end things. It’s already hard enough as it is. I don’t want to hurt you more.”

  “Bullshit,” she said.

  Colt blinked at her.

  “Bullshit,” she repeated. “When we were at the cabin, you told me that all the women you’ve slept with, that they knew what they were getting themselves into, knew you didn’t do relationships yet they chose to be with you anyway. How is this any different?”

  His upper lip twitched in frustration. How could she compare herself to any who came before her? “Because you’re different. You mean something to me, Belle. Those other women, they never wanted me, not the true me. They wanted my reputation, my position, for me to be another notch on their bedposts that they could brag about.” He fought back a snarl at the rumors his love life had created. “Commander fucking Casanova, remember?” he grumbled. “I couldn’t have cared about those women beyond one night, not the way I do with you. I’ve told you that much, and I won’t take advantage of you.”

  That was the end of the discussion as far as he was concerned, but she wasn’t having it.

  “It’s not taking advantage of me if I want it.”

  She was testing every limit he had. He wanted her so much. Wanted to take her hard and rough right here on this porch. Why did she have to make this so difficult?

  “What do you want from me, woman? I’ve already broken every rule for you, shown you parts of myself I never wanted to show another living soul. Every day, I struggle not to be like the wolf who sired me. I won’t start now by using you for my own pleasure when I can’t promise you more. We’ve had our one night. We’ll leave it at that. It’s already caused us enough trouble as it is.”

  “Is that what I am to you? Trouble?” she asked.

  “No, Belle. That’s what I am to you. One night together, and already I can see you’ve got your eyes on forever. But my circumstance won’t change.” He shook his head. “Making love to you again when I know you want more wouldn’t just be cruel. It’d show you exactly how much of a monster I am, and I have no intention of doing that.”

  He moved to stand, but she caught him by the arm, urging him back down onto the bench of the porch swing.

  “Nolan Calhoun may be your father, Colt, but from the moment I met you, I’ve yet to see any of this monster you think you are.” She gripped what she could of his bicep. Her hand barely wrapped halfway around it. “You want to know what I think?”

  He was still shaking his head. “You’ll likely tell me either way, so go on.”

  “I think you use Nolan as an excuse.”

  He stilled, watching her from the corner of his eye. She had no idea what she was getting herself into. But part of him didn’t want to warn her. Part of him wanted to let the pieces fall where they may.

  “He may have been your birth father, but he wasn’t the man who raised you. I’d wager you’re more like James than you’ve ever been like Nolan. You may say you’re a monster, but you do that to push people away, keep them at arm’s length. But I know the truth…” She placed a hand on the whiskers of his cheek. “You may be Wild Eight, Colt Cavanaugh, but you don’t have a single monstrous bone in your whole body.”

  “That’s where you’re wrong.”

  She was so wrong. Horribly, terribly wrong.

  Gripping her by the hips, he wrenched her into his lap, shoving her legs open until she was straddling the rock-hard length of him. She let out a breathy little moan as he rubbed against her. His words were a dark, sinful promise. “You want to see what a monster I can be, then fine,” he purred. “I’ll show you.” He fisted her hair, pulling her down as he ground against her. She practically whimpered with want of him, her eyes pleading.

  “I may care for you, Belle, but I’ll never be the kind of man who calls in the morning.”

  “I’m not asking you to be.” She bit her lower lip, drawing his attention there in a way that made his cock throb. “Take me,” she whispered. “Touch me. Fuck me.”

  He growled. He knew she’d chosen that dirty word just for him. “You deserve more than what I have to offer.”

  “I don’t care,” she breathed, leaning against him. The soft mounds of her breasts pushed flush against his chest. “I want you, Colt. All of you.”

  If she wanted him at his worst, his darkest and dirtiest, then he’d give her exactly that.

  His order was dark and feral. “Get on your knees.”

  Belle’s eyes widened. A hint of an amused smile curled on her lips as she blinked at him. “Excuse me?”

  “You heard me.” He leaned forward, lifting her from his lap to set her firmly on the porch in front of him. She stood, watching his every move.

  “Get on your knees, Belle,” he purred again.

  He saw her immediate urge was to resist his commanding tone, but that hint of a grin told him a part of her was thrilled by it. He wasn’t requesting her submission—he was demanding it. And from that spark in her eyes, she loved it.

  She eased down in front of him, reaching for his belt buckle. With painfully slow movements meant to torture him, she undid the clasp, loosening the button and lowering the zipper of his jeans until the length of him sprang forth.

  She gripped him at the base, and an aroused moan rumbled in his chest. A bead of moisture gathered at the tip as she stroked his shaft. Dipping her head down, she swiped off the salty drop with a flick of her tongue.

  Colt’s head fell backward, and he let out a satisfied groan. The feel of her mouth on him was exquisite. He buried his hands in her hair, tangling the dark curls in his fingers.

  Her soft lips grazed over the tender flesh, kissing and nuzzling against the thickness of the head until he was barely able to control himself.

  “I love this darker side of you,” she whispered against him as she trailed delicious kisses over the length of his cock. “Just as much as the gentleness I know you’re capable of.”

  She held him at the base again, drawing him fully into her mouth. Her tongue was hot and wet against him, the heat of her mouth doing wild and unimaginable things to him. Her tongue massaged the tender underside of the head, hitting that spot that drove him crazy with want and made his balls tighten in anticipation.

  He watched her as she worked over him, drawing him in and out of her mouth until he was the one bucking with need. The porch swing acted as a horrible temptation, allowing her to glide easier down the length of his cock as she drew him all the way back near her throat.

  When he started to think he couldn’t take anymore, she drew back, blowing a gentle burst of cool air across his moist skin. His dick jerked in response.

  “Does this make you feel powerful? Like some big, bad alpha wolf?” she asked. Her voice was low and aroused.

  He gave a barely perceptible nod. Her submission did make him feel powerful, strong and feral. She grinned at him, staring up at him with those large hazel eyes lined with thick, dark lashes.

  “That’s where you’re wrong.” She grinned. She circled her tongue over him, licking him like he was the most delicious thing she’d ever tasted. He let out a deep-throated groan.

  “I’m the one in power here, Colt,” she whispered, �
��and I intend to use it to the fullest.”

  The things this woman could do to him. Drawing him into her mouth again, she worked the length of his shaft until he was teetering on the brink, so close to spilling his seed into the wet heat of her mouth that he couldn’t take it.

  “Come here,” he growled.

  Lifting her with ease, he pulled her up, ripping at the button of her pants until her jeans were around her ankles. She kicked off her boots, and he used the heel of his own boot to shove the jeans the rest of the way off as he tugged her into his lap. He sheathed himself inside her and she cried out. He pumped into her, rubbing against the bead of her clit as she rode him. She was tight, so much tighter than even her delicious mouth had been, and so wet, he could barely stand it. The thought of his cock in her mouth causing that heat to blossom between her legs sent him over the edge.

  He spilled himself inside her, crying out as he came. Another few strokes of his thumb over that hot bead between her thighs, and she followed him, finding her climax in a burst of ecstasy that left them both panting.

  She collapsed against him, burying her face in the crook of his neck as she nuzzled him, kissed him. Every inch of his skin felt charged and alive.

  “See,” she whispered against his ear. “I can talk dirty, even without the naughty words.” He felt her grin against his skin.

  He chuckled.

  Suddenly, the creak of the porch’s screen door opened, and someone padded outside. “What the hell is going on out here? Are you guys—? Shit.”

  Colt pulled Belle closer, attempting to shield her from view.

  Blaze swore. “I can’t ever unsee that,” he groaned loudly, tearing back into the house.

  When Blaze was good and gone, Colt eased Belle back. She’d had her head buried into his shoulder. He expected her to be mortified, though in Blaze’s defense, they had been rutting like animals out in the open air of the porch. Hardly somewhere private.

  A beat of silence passed between them. Belle’s cheeks burned a blazing red, but before he could apologize, she started to laugh, full-bellied giggles that were infectious. Pretty soon he was laughing, too, the two of them collapsing into each other.