Astray

by J F Rogers

  Never had I heard Cahal speak so many words at once.

  ****

  Bellies full of rabbit and a soupy root concoction Pepin whipped up, we laid down to sleep. The day was overcast and cool. Perfect for sleeping.

  I dreamt. The lights appeared quicker this time.

  “Fallon.” Relief lined Aodan’s voice, as if he’d been waiting for me.

  A tornado of emotions swirled inside me. Should I run? Should I talk to him? Sully warned me to run away, not to look at the light. But what if I could find out where he was, what he planned? What if he didn’t intend to kill me? Would he turn me into the monster I feared I’d become? A cyclical debate raged, rooting me to the spot.

  “Fallon!” Aodan commanded my attention.

  “What?” I yelled, irritated, instantly regretting having responded at all. I should have thought this through before dreaming again, should have formed a plan. I knew I should run. What stopped me?

  I couldn’t see his face, but I sensed him smiling. His glee filled the space of this imaginary world.

  “I’m glad you’ve returned. Have you given my offer any consideration?”

  “What offer? To turn me into a monster?”

  “A monster? Nay.” He snickered. “I offer much more than that. I offer you power, control…immortality.”

  “Yeah. At the price of becoming a monster. Killing innocent people. Feeding off them. Enslaving them. Enslaving my mother.”

  “It’s merely a means of survival, dear one. Is the lion evil for feeding on the lamb?”

  “That’s not the point.” Was he trying to confuse me?

  “I’m in your mind, Fallon. I know you. I sense your pain. The loss of your family. If you accept what I offer, you will have your mother. You can make her and others you care about immortal. They don’t have to die…ever. You don’t have to experience such pain. You can be in control of your destiny.”

  It took a moment to absorb his words. Someone understood my pain? All the death. The lack of family. Would it be possible to never face the loss of loved ones again? Would I be forever free of the desire to cut myself? Could I have real control? Isn’t that what I’d been fighting for my whole life? Control? And family? He offered me both.

  No. Something about this wasn’t right. No one can cheat death. People have to die eventually. This offer was served on a platter of damnation. If you believed in such things. The monster. This is how I’d become the monster.

  Did I care?

  Aodan’s delight mingled with my torment. A disconcerting sensation.

  No. No. “No!” I squeezed my eyes shut.

  The joy dissipated, replaced by rage. “You can’t shut me out so easily, Fallon. You will join me. You know you want—”

  His presence lifted. I opened my eyes. The light was gone. I turned to the woman for her merciful attack to wake me.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  ◊◊◊

  AFTER ANOTHER WEEK OF traversing thick woods, we came to a slim dirt road, the only kind that seemed to exist in Ariboslia. No more brambles to slow us. I let out a sigh and rubbed the scratches along my arms, feeling freed by the open road compared to the cramped woods, but also tensing up. Roads were only laid where people or, in Ariboslia, some type of semi-intelligent creature traveled. I searched every direction, listening for movement, ready to retreat into the forest.

  “Declan,” I asked, “Shouldn’t we keep to the woods? Under cover?”

  “Nay. We’re far off the path to Diabalta.”

  “So? Isn’t it still dangerous?”

  Ryann sidled up to me. “Aodan expects you to go to Diabalta to rescue your mother. Besides, this isn’t his territory. Yet.”

  “Drochaid seems to be leading us to Gnuatthara,” Declan said.

  I looked at him. “You mean—”

  He nodded. “To the Treasach.”

  I groaned, dropped my shoulders, and wrinkled my nose. I wanted nothing to do with those baby killers. “Really? Of all places?”

  Declan laughed.

  “What?”

  “You.” He shook his head, still chuckling. “Drochaid is unnecessary as a translator with you. You make your feelings known without speaking. They’re written all over you.”

  Should I act indifferent to visiting a bunch of baby murderers? I wanted nothing to do with those barbarians. I didn’t care if they were on our side. I was not on theirs. “Why would God want us to go there?”

  “All will reveal itself in due time. For now, we must trust. Perhaps we can get supplies whilst we’re there.” Ryann looked down at her footwear. “And shoes.”

  I agreed on her point. Pebbles kept making their way into holes in mine. Every few steps, I had to shake my feet to free my shoes of rubble, like a cat walking through a puddle. It aggravated me enough to consider going barefoot.

  The way grew steep, climbing a plateau, and my calves burned halfway to the top. When a twenty-five-foot-high wall came into view, Cahal reached his five-word-per-day quota. “Be on guard. Stick together.”

  “The wall surrounds the entire village on this plateau. They built it during the clan wars,” Declan said. “With their size and strength, they had few worthy opponents. It went decades unguarded until the threats escalated a few years ago. Now, as the fasgadair grow stronger, the Treasach have heightened security.” As we approached the entryway, he spoke out of the corner of his mouth in a hushed voice. “This is the only way in or out. They close the gate at dusk and will not raise it again until sunrise.”

  I gulped as my gaze ran up and down the enormous guards. My anger fizzled, and the old feeling I’d grown to expect settled in the pit of my stomach—fear. They must be eight feet tall, with biceps the size of basketballs and hands capable of picking me up by the head like a claw machine.

  One glance at these supposed super beings, and I believed Declan’s parents told him the truth about his abandonment. It was his size alone. He was more muscular than most teenage boys, but his height was average, perhaps a smidge taller than most. I didn’t get a good look at the Treasach children at Notirr, but no way was he half the mega-infant these guards must have been. Envisioning these monsters as babies, toddling around in tents for diapers, made me laugh.

  Yet again, all eyes aimed at me as though I’d swallowed a bird and its tail feathers stuck out of my mouth. I stopped smiling.

  A pungent odor—a cross between a locker room and low tide—hit me. I stepped back, brought my hand to my nose, and let out a strained, “Ugh.” The smell strengthened with each step. What caused such a stink? It hung in the air like fog with no signs of lifting, making my eyes water, clouding my vision.

  Wolf snorted multiple times. Pepin dismounted as Wolf paused to swipe at his nose with his foreleg. He continued blowing air out his snout.

  A city with only one way out. Was I this desperate for new shoes? Perhaps I could get a few more miles out of the ragged pieces of leather dangling from my feet. But no. Drochaid insisted.

  At the gate, face-to-stomach with the guards, I trembled, wrapping my arms across my rib cage. Even Cahal, reaching the shoulders of the shortest one, had to look up at them.

  Ryann, our self-appointed speaker, shielded her eyes from the sun and spoke to the guards. I steeled myself for her over-disclosure, unsure what these people would think of a human in their midst. “We are travelers from Notirr. We seek a room for the night, food, and supplies. Have you room for us?”

  They waved us by with undisguised impatience. Their distrustful eyes turned to me and narrowed. I clung to Declan, hurrying him past. Either their paranoia was contagious or my imagination was out of control.

  I breathed easier once we were several feet away. That was it? Ryann wasn’t going to offer blood samples? They didn’t even bother to ask who we were or what our business was. They weren’t very good at being paranoid.

  I peeked back at Pepin. He must’ve felt like an ant in comparison. If he did, it did
n’t show. He walked through the gate with an air of confidence. The guards must pale in comparison to a uilebheist.

  Beyond the thick walls, market stands littered a bustling courtyard. Merchants shouted to potential buyers. People hurried from place to place in a seemingly haphazard fashion. Stone and wood buildings lay beyond, lined by alleyways. With the wall so high, and the visible area within so wide, I couldn’t possibly determine Gnuatthara’s true size.

  A monstrous horse startled me as it galloped past. With a massive Treasach astride, they blocked the sun, and the ground vibrated under their weight. I was about the height of the horse’s leg. The animals must be bred for size and strength as well.

  The further from the entrance we drew, the fainter the stench became, unless I was becoming desensitized to it. Since we were far enough from the guards, I asked, “What was the rank smell?”

  Pepin scrunched his nose. “What smell?”

  I scowled at him. “It smelled like sweat and bad fish.”

  “The Treasach line the wall with a compound made from decaying fish. The fasgadair are repulsed by the stench. I don’t know what else you smell,” Declan said.

  “The sweat smell is the Treasach.” Ryann wrinkled her nose. “I notice it too.”

  “Is anyone else bothered by the fish smell?”

  No one responded.

  “I guess it’s only you.” Declan smiled, elbowing me. “You must be a fasgadair.”

  “Ha. Ha. Very funny.” I stuck my tongue out at him.

  Ignoring our banter as usual, Cahal called over his shoulder, “The inn is this way.”

  We followed him across the courtyard like bugs on a sidewalk, attempting to avoid giant feet.

  After Cahal secured a room, we headed to a pub across the alley. I would’ve much preferred take-out and retreat to the security of our private room, but I supposed fast food was a luxury the gachen were not accustomed to. We huddled together at a corner table. Pepin sat across from me. Nearly obscured by the table, he reminded me of pictures Bumpah used to draw of a cartoon man with a large nose and two eyes peeking over the edge of paper, napkins, envelopes, or whatever else Bumpah had available.

  As more Treasach filed in, I wished we were closer to the exit. “’Tis better to have our backs to the walls,” Cahal explained in his few-words-as-possible manner.

  No one seemed to have any qualms about Wolf’s presence. A large woman, her blonde hair woven into an intricate braid, bustled through the crowd. She carried a massive platter over her head, pausing now and again when the commotion threatened to tip it. Without asking, she placed the tray loaded with random meats onto the center of the table. She never uttered a word or smiled.

  What? No menus? This was unquestionably the most bizarre dining experience of my life.

  After everyone bowed their heads for a moment of silence, Cahal reached for two large T-bone steaks. He tore into one, tossing the other to Wolf. Ryann, Declan, and Pepin looked unconcerned as they, too, dug in. I gaped, dumbfounded. We ate like this without plates as we traveled. But this was a restaurant. What kind of restaurant failed to offer simple things like plates, silverware, menus—choices?

  “Is something wrong?” Declan wiped juice off his mouth with his sleeve as I stared at the remaining mound of meat before us. Where were the eggs, bacon, and other breakfast foods?

  “No,” I mumbled, reaching for what appeared to be a chicken leg. It tasted charred, unseasoned. As I chewed, the waitress returned with a tray of heavy mugs. She placed all but one on the table—the other she put on the floor for Wolf.

  Eager for something to drink, I lifted the cup to my lips. By the time the scent reached my nose, it was too late. I’d already taken a sip. The sour liquid touched my tongue. I spit the foul liquor out. “What is that?” I broke down and wiped my mouth on my sleeve, since napkins seemed nonexistent.

  “Mead.” Cahal drank it like water.

  “It’s nasty.” I pushed the cup away. “They drink this stuff this early in the morning?”

  Declan, Ryann, and Pepin passed on theirs too. Declan shrugged. “The Treasach enjoy fermented drink. The Cael prefer to avoid drinking too much. ‘Tis better to be clear minded. Not to worry. We’ll get water later.”

  “You’d think they’d want a clear mind too, especially if they’re afraid of invasion.” Nods met my comment.

  As I sat, chewing my food, morbid fascination drew my attention to the Treasach. Scars and bruises peppered their arms, heads, and necks. Manners appeared as nonexistent as napkins. Male and female alike erupted in guttural, full belly laughs at any bodily noise. Half-chewed meat hung from their crooked, yellow teeth. The way they groped at each other made me drop my gaze. My appetite dissipated as my desire for a bath elevated to new levels.

  I couldn’t ignore the commotion at the next table. A male with a black beard separated into two braids leaned back in his chair and scratched his shaved head. A scar ran from the front of his ear to his chin. A low gurgle in his gut rose in volume as it ascended his esophagus. He unhinged his jaw as gastrointestinal fumes spewed forth accompanied by the sound of the sudden release of toxic gases. The noise reverberated throughout the pub above the din. His mates exploded with laughter as they feigned attempts to waft the noxious scent from their noses.

  I shook my head. Giant six year olds.

  A couple of tables away, seven loud, obnoxious males complained about nighttime guard duty. Our waitress dropped off heaping plates of grilled carcasses in front of them. As she turned to leave, one of the creeps swatted her behind.

  Mouth agape, I stared, wanting to beat him senseless despite his stature.

  The woman didn’t hesitate to reply by clocking him, close-fisted, square in the jaw. Yes! She then walked off as the male, gazing at her with admiration, grasped his jaw and rammed it back in place without as much as a wince. He laughed with his buddies as they barraged him with congratulatory pats on the back and punches on the arm.

  Neanderthals.

  I scanned my companions’ faces for their reaction to these grotesque beings. All but Cahal, who sat licking his fingers while ignoring the ruckus around him, appeared as uncomfortable as I.

  Cahal paid, liberating me from a horrific place that should only exist in nightmares. I rushed through the crowd, dodging unwelcome advances, and burst out the door. Cahal set off for supplies as the rest of us returned to our room. The time had come I was most anxious for, an indoor bath and a real bed.

  “The bathroom is down there.” Ryann pointed at a door down the hall.

  “We share it?”

  “No need to look so scared.” She smiled, placing a consolatory hand on my shoulder. “The door has a lock.”

  The shared bath didn’t sit well, but the pool-sized tub did. I could swim in it. Once I soaped up, someone banged on the door, causing it to bulge with each strike. A gruff voice yelled, “Move along in there!”

  Fearing an impatient Treasach might break down the door, I fled, soap residue clinging to my skin.

  Cahal had not yet returned when I entered the room. “Was it me or was Cahal the only one not bothered by the Treasach at the pub?”

  Declan shrugged as he walked past me out of the room.

  “Cahal responds to things in his own way.” Ryann sat on the bed by the door, brushing her hair. “’Tis not for us to judge him or to discuss him without his presence. If you have a question for him, you should ask him directly.”

  Her tone wasn’t unkind. And she was right. Still, her correction stung. I retreated to the other bed.

  Snoring made me stir. Dazed, I wiped my eyes and pulled myself up on my elbows. Thin strips of light streamed through the shutter slats. Cahal had returned, clean-shaven. He slept in a sitting position, slumped against the door. Ryann slept on the bed closest to the door. Wolf lay beside me in the one near the window, a paw slightly twitching. Declan, on the floor next to Pepin, must have shaved too. Without his scraggly beard, he looked
much younger…and cuter.

  Pepin was the guilty one. On his back, mouth open, he gargled air. As the air left his mouth, his moustache puffed out.

  I groaned, draped a leg over the side of the bed, and kicked him.

  He inhaled sharply, smacked his lips a few times, grunted, and rolled over.

  The sleeping conditions weren’t ideal, but I couldn’t complain, now that the only noise was deep breathing. It had been too long since I slept in a dark room. Or on a bed. And I had Wolf. I lowered myself back onto the mattress and closed my eyes.

  I gazed along the horizon to the woman on the shore.

  “Fallon, I’ve been waiting for you.”

  My body jerked toward Aodan. It was happening much quicker now. How could I have been so careless? Was it too late to run now?

  “Have you considered my offer?”

  “I will never join you.” I attempted to make my voice sound stronger than my will, but I was growing tired of this journey.

  “Ah, how unfortunate. I’d hate to consider the alternative. You heard rumor of what I did to my dear sister, have you not? My twin. We shared a womb. Our minds, our very souls were connected.” He quieted, probably for dramatic effect. “How much more might I torture you?” The phony compassion in his voice sent chills up my spine.

  “Isn’t that what you planned to do anyway?”

  “Despite what you may have been told, I’m not as bad as I may seem. Notirr is still secure, is it not? They have their freedom.”

  “So it’s not enough to kill me? You’re threatening them now?”

  “You don’t have to die, Fallon. Neither do the Cael. Reconsider my offer, before it’s too late.”

  A shrill, unceasing whistle pierced the air. I bolted upright in bed and scanned the room, trying to get a grip on reality.

  Declan, looking groggy, rose to open the shutters. “Night has fallen.” He pointed across the way. “Look at the wall.”

  We all crowded the window. The guards lining the wall had multiplied. How long had we slept?

  Declan stiffened, “It might be a drill or…”