SPIN

by K. J. Farnham

  I have never been late for school before, but I guess there’s a first time for everything. When my mom pulls her Nissan to the curb, I debate telling her I don’t feel well and asking if she could turn the car around and drop me off at home. Except for when I’m running, having the attention of a lot of people scares me to death, so the thought of walking into first-period psychology has my stomach in knots.

  “Looks like we weren’t the only ones who got a late start this morning. Maybe others had their power go out last night too.” She nods toward the main entrance where several others are straggling in. I stare at the front door and watch as they all disappear inside. “What’s wrong?”

  The words ‘I’m sick’ are on the tip of my tongue, but then a vision from my dream pops into my head. I see Leighton standing next to Jenna, and I have a sudden urge to talk to her again, to press her for anything she might have neglected to tell Delaney and me on Saturday. I open my door a crack as I look over at my mom. “Nothing. I’m fine.”

  She leans over and gives me a hug and a kiss on the cheek. “Have a good day, honey.” She turns and places her hand on the shifter, ready to leave.

  “Thanks,” I whisper, diverting my gaze out the window at the large brick sign in front of our school. Not unless Jenna’s here. God, please let her be here.

  “Keel? You okay?” I feel her eyes on me again.

  “Mom?”

  “Yeah?”

  “Do you think she’s in there?” I know she doesn’t know the answer, but I ask anyway because the little girl in me will always believe my mom has all the answers, that she can solve any problem.

  “You mean Jenna?”

  I nod and look over at her just in time to see her face tense up.

  She swallows hard. Then, as she breaks eye contact with me, she says, “I don’t think so, sweetie. I’m sure Bonnie would have let us know if she turned up last night.”

  We sit in silence while the late bell rings, signifying I’ll need to stop in the office for a pass.

  I take a deep breath and open my door all the way. “I’m going to run the track after school, so I’ll be home a little late. Thanks for the ride.” I sneak a smile her way before hopping out of the car and hustling up the stairs to the front doors.

  I appreciate the way my mom isn’t one to sugarcoat things. But maybe, just this once, she could have made an exception.

  The atmosphere in my first-period psych class feels different today. In fact, the entire path to the office for my late slip, to my locker, and then to class seems off. I shrug the feeling away, thinking it’s probably because I’m disoriented from being late. Or is it possible the news that Jenna is missing has already spread to all our classmates?

  When I walk into class, people are arranged in groups scattered around the room—some standing, some sitting—all too preoccupied to notice me. Even Mr. Sartorius is busy tapping away on his laptop. I place my late slip on the corner of his desk. “Sorry I’m late.”

  He looks up quickly but doesn’t say anything, which is uncharacteristic of Stickler Sartorius. He stares at me for so long, I begin to wonder if there are crumbs from the breakfast bar I ate in the car on my face.

  I sweep the back of my hand across my lips and then say, “For some reason, our power went out, so our alarms didn’t go—”

  “Oh, don’t worry about it, Keeley,” he says as he waves off my excuse. I don’t think I’ve ever heard him speak this kindly to anyone before.

  “Okay, well, should I just . . .” I begin backing away slowly. “. . . join a group and find out what the assignment is?”

  “Hold on.” He waves me forward, so I backtrack to where I had been standing beside his desk.

  Whispering, he says, “How are you doing?”

  So, he knows.

  “Um . . .” I feel eyes on me now. “I’m fine.”

  “Well, if you need to talk, just know that I’m here. Okay?”

  But what exactly does he know?

  “About?”

  “About Jenna. We were informed of her disappearance at an emergency staff meeting this morning, and a couple of police officers are interviewing teachers and students in Coach Jeffries’ office. I know the two of you are close. Don’t let it get you down. You’re a good student.” With a lazy grin, he goes back to clicking away on his laptop.

  His intentions might be good, but I want nothing more than to knock the mug of coffee into his lap. Don’t let it get me down? Well, thanks for bringing it up.

  “I won’t.” I turn and quickly walk to the nearest group, praying that Sartorius doesn’t call me back for anything and never offers me another pep talk again.

  Aside from talking to Tina for a few minutes, I spend the remainder of class avoiding unnecessary eye contact with anyone and doing my best to focus on my group’s task at hand—to come up with an argument for rehabilitation as opposed to prison for non-violent drug-related offenses. It’s hard for me to concentrate, though, because I sense a lot of staring in my direction and off-task whispering going on within the other groups. It makes me anxious. Could everyone know Jenna is missing? There’s no way they would have already announced it to the entire school. Has she been gone long enough for them to do that?

  The rest of the morning drags. I get some of the same long, piteous stares from a few more teachers but still no direct questions or comments from anyone besides Tina, who wanted to know if I’d been interviewed by the police already.

  When lunch finally rolls around, I’m dying to see Delaney. I wonder if teachers are treating her weird too. As I approach our table, the glance we share gives me my answer. Delaney looks tired, and her expression is flat, unlike her usual chipper self. Dustin is sitting on the other side of the table as far away from Delaney as possible. The only person talking is Emily Davis, which is no surprise at all. Whenever she snags a spot next to Eli, no one can get a word in edgewise with him. But it is unusual for the rest of the table to be so quiet.

  Delaney waves and picks up her bag to make room for me between her and Emily.

  Great.

  As I make my way around the circular table, everyone greets me with a hey or a nod.

  Eli glances over his shoulder at me before I pass behind him and Emily. Emily ignores me, leaning in closer and talking louder to Eli, eager for him to turn his attention back to her.

  At least she’s acting normal today.

  I sigh quietly when I maneuver into my seat because I notice the way Eli and Emily are sitting hip to hip. I know Eli will always be off limits to me, but I still feel a twinge of jealousy. I’m also still irritated that Emily moved in on him so fast after Jenna’s outburst when she made it clear to everyone within earshot that not only was she not cool with Eli “weaseling his way into our group” but she also didn’t want Eli and I having anything to do with each other. It was a week after Eli had asked me to homecoming, so now I’ve still never been to homecoming with a date.

  Emily looks over at me, and I hope the piece of chocolate she’s just popped in her mouth results in a big pimple on her nose.

  “Why is everyone so quiet?”

  Delaney stares at me for a second then asks, “Keeley, haven’t you heard the rumors?”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “The cops have been here talking to kids all morning, and now there are even more stupid rumors flying around about Jenna.” She narrows her eyes and glances around the table at everyone.

  “Sartorius told me about the cops, but what rumors?” I ask.

  “That maybe Jenna overdosed on something. Or maybe she witnessed a drug deal gone bad and is buried in a cornfield somewhere. Maybe she ran away . . .”

  “Well, I was late this morning, so this is the first I’m hearing any of it. I sure hope people aren’t telling the police that junk, though.” As I unscrew the cap from a bottle of water and take a drink, I glance around the table. Everyone diverts their eyes, even Dustin.

  Delaney is looking at me, but instead of agreei
ng with me, she takes a bite of a granola bar.

  “Wait, does anyone here think any of those rumors could be true?”

  “Well . . . she was doing drugs,” Tina says, glancing over at Corbin who’s staring at the table.

  “And she was drinking a lot too,” Lisa adds.

  “Right, but she got most of the alcohol and drugs she did from Corbin. So . . . are you aware of anyone ever overdosing on pot? Were you recently involved in any drug deals gone bad? I mean, give me a break.”

  “Well, she still could have run away,” Delaney says.

  I don’t even have time to convey my disbelief to her with a look because then Dustin adds his two cents, which shocks me even more.

  “Come on, Keeley, how can you blame anyone for wondering if those things are possible with the way Jenna has been acting?”

  Almost everyone nods their agreement, and suddenly I find myself nodding too. Because after what Tyson told me, I guess anything is possible now with Jenna.

  “You’re never late. What happened?” Delaney asks loudly, changing the subject.

  I can sense everyone’s relief.

  “Our power went out last night, so no one’s alarm went off. Well, except for my dad’s because he uses his phone.”

  “Yeah, ours went out too,” Tommy pipes in.

  “Ours too,” Eli says, making eye contact with me, holding my gaze a little too long for my liking considering the audience. Everyone knows we liked each other before Jenna made it clear that she wasn’t okay with us dating.

  “Hm, wonder why,” Delaney shrugs.

  “Who knows. They’re renovating that gas station over on Silver Spring. Maybe workers hit a power line,” Tommy offers.

  “They don’t build gas stations in the middle of the night, doofus,” Delaney jokes, and everyone laughs. Even me. Except I’m just going through the motions.

  The banter prompts several side conversations. Plans are being made for the upcoming weekend. Basketball game. Party at Emily’s. That’s when I see Leighton toss her tray in the trash and head for the door.

  “I have to use the bathroom. Be right back,” I say to Delaney as I hop up to chase after Leighton. Delaney’s disappointed voice follows me, but I don’t have time to stop and explain what I’m really doing, especially not in front of everyone. Eli is staring at me again when I glance back. I don’t have time to worry about that either. I’m desperate to catch up to Leighton.

  When I turn the corner, the hallway is empty, so I cross over to the girls’ bathroom. The door squeaks when I pull it open, like it always does, except the silence amplifies it. No one is at the sinks, so I crouch down and scan for feet. Nothing. I’m about to turn and head back to the lunch room when footsteps approach.

  I stand and turn around at the same time, putting up my forearms in defense.

  “What the hell? Wait . . . did you think I was attacking you or something?” Leighton laughs.

  Dropping my arms, I exhale my panic. “No. No, I . . . you snuck up on me.” I roll my eyes and cross my arms. “What were you doing hiding in the corner, anyway?”

  Her smile fades. “Why are you following me?”

  “What are you talking about? I wasn’t. I had to go to the bathroom.”

  “Yeah, okay,” she says with a scoff as she moves to step around me.

  “Wait,” I say, putting both of my hands up, hoping to temporarily eliminate the passive-aggressive barrier that divides us.

  “What do you want?”

  “Did the police talk to you yet?”

  “Yeah. So?”

  “Well, what did you tell them?”

  “I told them Jenna had been meeting people in a chat room, and one of the guys was starting to creep her out.”

  “Why? What did he do?”

  “She just said he wouldn’t stop messaging her and kept asking to meet her in person.”

  Delaney bursts through the door. “There you two are.” She walks over and stands next to me so we’re both facing Leighton.

  “Oh, great,” Leighton mumbles.

  “Well, was she talking to other guys in this chat room? And why didn’t you tell Delaney and I about this when we talked to you on Saturday?”

  “Wait, what chat room?” Delaney asks. “And yeah, why didn’t you tell us about it on Saturday?”

  “Just stop, both of you. Because it wasn’t any of your business. It still isn’t.”

  “Well, I’m glad you told the police. Will you tell us where she was going when she left your house now?”

  “Again, not your business,” she says, shaking her head.

  “Are you kidding me?” Delaney snarls, but Leighton acts like she didn’t even hear her.

  “Leighton, do you not care at all that Jenna still hasn’t shown up? Do you even care about her at all? Are you capable of caring about anyone?” My voice gets louder and louder until I practically scream the last question.

  Leighton’s nostrils flare and, for a second, I’m afraid she’s going to slap me. I take a step back. But to mine and Delaney’s surprise, her shoulders slump, and she backs away until she’s up against the wall. Then she slides down onto the floor. “Yes, I care.”

  Delaney and I look at each other, both of us stunned. Then we move closer to Leighton and crouch down in front of her.

  “Then if there’s anything else you haven’t told us or the police already, you really need to.”

  Leighton closes her eyes, grips her temples, and sighs heavily. Suddenly her eyes snap open. “I saw her writing in a fancy notebook a few times, on the nights she slept over.”

  “Oh my God. That’s so weird. I had this dream, and Jenna was holding her diary in it. And she was with you,” I say, looking at Leighton.

  “So, do you think we should try to find her diary?” Delaney asks.

  “That’s actually a good idea,” I say.

  “Don’t you think they would have already checked her diary or handed it over to the police?” Leighton asks, sliding her back up the wall until she’s standing. Delaney and I follow suit and stand too.

  “Maybe,” I say, realizing Leighton is probably right. “But we should still take a look, just in case.”

  “Okay, so where is it and how do we get it?” Delaney asks.

  “Well, it must be in her room somewhere, so we could go over and talk to Mrs. Kemp today after school. Then maybe one of us could sneak into her room and grab it?”

  “Wait, but if the police haven’t already seen it, don’t you think they’d want it?”

  “Yeah, you’re probably right, but I still feel like we should look at it first. Just in case there’s something in there that’ll help us figure out what’s been going on with her, something the cops and her parents might not understand.”

  “Okay, then I’ll ditch out of cheer practice, and we’ll go tonight,” Delaney says. Then she looks at Leighton. “Do you want to go?

  “Sorry, but you guys are on your own if you plan to snoop around in Jenna’s room.”

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  Saturday, September 23, 2017

  Five Weeks Before Jenna’s Disappearance

  After the argument Jenna and Dustin had gotten into the weekend before, things had been strained between them. He was taking longer to return her texts, he skipped walking to history class with her twice, he didn’t make an effort to sit next to her during lunch, and he seemed distant the night before when they’d watched a movie at her house. She knew it was because she’d been drinking carelessly and smoked pot at Jolliet, but she also wondered if he was beginning to tire of having a girlfriend who tensed at his touch and never seemed to be any closer to taking their physical relationship any further. So Jenna swore to herself she’d do her best to fix things. She couldn’t risk losing Dustin because of her past. She’d try harder to pretend nothing was wrong, that she wasn’t riddled with anxiety and fear. She’d make it all up to Dustin somehow, starting with accompanying him to Tommy’s second annual pre-homecoming bash. To prepare,
she’d smoked some of the pot she’d purchased from Lou after school on Friday.

  Two hours into the party, things were going great. Dustin had driven Jenna, Delaney, and Keeley, and the four had a blast playing an intense game of Tippy Cup, a popular party game among their classmates. Jenna tried to show Dustin that she had taken his suggestion to start making better decisions to heart, so she drank water when their team lost a round and didn’t give in to the hecklers encouraging her to switch to beer. For the first time in weeks, it seemed like things were getting back on track, minus the pot she’d consumed earlier without anyone’s knowledge.

  “Hey, I need to use the bathroom,” Jenna said to her friends who were now gathered near the Tippy Cup table as spectators.

  “Oh, I’ll go with you,” Keeley said.

  “Me too,” Delaney added.

  “Well then, I’ll just stay here and save our spot in line.” Dustin leaned over, meaning to kiss Jenna’s check, but she surprised him by turning to catch his lips with hers.

  “Boom chicka wowow,” Delaney mumbled, making Jenna laugh.

  When the girls returned, Dustin was no longer watching Tippy Cup, so they went looking for him.

  As they circulated, Jenna and Keeley lost track of Delaney in the kitchen where a group of girls were talking about making appointments to get their hair and nails done for homecoming the following weekend. Delaney had to do her best to send some business her mom’s way. Then Jenna lost track of Keeley in the living room when someone in her psych class asked her about something. When Jenna turned the corner to the back hallway leading to the basement, she ran into Eli who happened to be holding a beer that spilled down the front of her shirt.

  “Oh, man. I’m so sorry,” he said, quickly setting down his half-empty red Solo cup and dabbing the front of Jenna’s shirt with his sleeve.

  Mortified, Jenna stumbled backward and tripped over someone’s shoes. Whoever it was caught her clumsily, and she felt hands touching her breasts as they both fell to the floor.

  “Jenna, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize that was you,” Eli said, moving forward and extending a hand to help pull her off of the person she’d fallen on.