Torn: A young adult paranormal romance (Breath of Fate Book 1)

by Angelina J. Steffort

  “Let’s find a quiet corner to shift, and then we can be off.” Leon walked me along the hallway, down toward the stairs that led to the gym. “It’s almost time.” He eyed me from the side, recognition in his face as I nodded. “You can feel that, too,” he concluded. “You know that it is time … well, your Lightbringer-self knows.”

  “That’s good, right?” I hoped. “That means I am getting closer to transferring my first soul.”

  “Anything that increases the likelihood you’ll be out of danger soon is good,” was Leon’s response as he pointed at a corner under the stairs and let go of me to glance over his shoulder and check if we had been followed before he hurried into the shadows.

  The corridor was empty.

  I followed suit, the tug in my chest almost unbearable now, and watched Leon switch into his ethereal form. “You remember how we got there last time?” He gave me an inquisitive look that made me feel like his apprentice rather than his friend, but I bobbed my head, eager to get to the soul and see this through so there would be peace and quiet in my chest.

  “Good.” His lips spread into a smile. “Then I’ll see you there,” he said with a significant look. “Wherever there is.” And he was gone.

  That was the beauty of it, Leon had explained. We never knew who was going to die or when exactly it would happen, or where; just that when someone’s time had come, we’d feel that pull, and as long as we were willing to answer it, it would lead us right to the deathbed of a ready soul.

  Leon trusted in my ability to make it by myself, or he wouldn’t leave me behind like this. Also, he had to trust that I would be gone before the Shadowbringer could even think of coming after me. The odds were that Cas hadn’t even felt that tug and Leon and I would be there and back before anyone could notice. And then, I would walk into that one class I dreaded all week—the one where Leon and I were separated.

  The tug burned under my ribs as I concentrated on it. The direction was clear. I would take off right through the walls and head north from the school. The final destination was unclear but couldn’t be too far away. At least, that was what Leon had explained one of the afternoons when he had tried to make conversation and I had refused to talk about anything other than Lightbringer details. I wouldn’t allow him to hide important facts such as purgatory from me again.

  I took a deep breath and was ready to switch—

  Nothing happened. Not even the slightest change in my perception, in the way my body felt … usually lighter in my ethereal form.

  I was about to try again when a soft voice asked, “And you were trying what, exactly?”

  I jerked around, my breath getting stuck as I stumbled into the side of the stairs and ended up kneeling on the floor, rubbing the shoulder I’d hit.

  I found the Shadowbringer leaning against the opposite wall, ankles crossed and one hand in his pocket while he was gesturing at me with the other. “Not that I don’t enjoy seeing you kneel, but you’ll be late for class.” He said it like it was a secret, tone hushed into a starlit murmur.

  At first, I couldn’t move, finding myself cornered by the enemy. Plus, he had the element of surprise on his side. “You’ll be late for class,” I bit at him and pushed myself upright.

  Leon, I thought, but even if I cried out his name right now, there wouldn’t be an answer. Leon was out of reach, busy collecting that lucky soul that didn’t have a Shadowbringer coming to bargain for it.

  “Oh, I am not intending on going to class today,” he informed me with a wicked smile … the sort that made your blood freeze.

  Meanwhile, the tug in my chest had started pulsing like a second heartbeat. It was time. I knew it. And I wasn’t there.

  “Neither am I,” I told Cas and closed my eyes, letting the sensation lead me and conjured the sensation of shifting into my non-corporeal form—

  I couldn’t. It was as if a wall of shadows had surrounded me, trapping me in my human body.

  When I glared at Cas, he winked at me, that simple gesture enough to confirm it was him keeping me from switching.

  “Let go,” I demanded and earned another grin that reminded me of a grimace rather than humor.

  “Not a chance in hell.”

  “Easy for you to say,” I gritted out, bracing myself against the shadows as if I could keep them out by merely wrapping my arms around myself. They were cold and uncomfortable on my skin … like November haze. “You are hell’s servant.”

  At that, he barked a laugh. “That’s what he told you I am?”

  Of course, he didn’t explain what he meant by that. That would have been too easy. So I rubbed my arms and dared to try taking a step forward.

  To my surprise, I stepped through the shadows in my physical form as easily as wading through morning fog. However, they furled and coiled around me, adjusting themselves to my shape so I couldn’t free myself and shift to follow Leon.

  “Does it hurt?” Cas asked, a mockery of sympathy on his features as he used that night colored velvet voice.

  I balled my hands into fists and dropped them to my sides, letting the cold wash through me like a breaking wave. “Oh, wouldn’t you like to know?” I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of admitting I was in pain. That he was keeping me from a mission and that Leon would harvest that soul for the side of the good if Cas didn’t show up.

  I still couldn’t tell if he felt the tug the same way I did. Maybe, if I bought some time, Leon would be back in time to stop the Shadowbringer from taking my soul. Leon sure was smart enough to hurry through the mission and return instead of waiting for me to show up. And he’d know by the absence of Cas that the latter had to be at school with me.

  “So what does it look like down there, in hell?” I hissed at him, hoping my gaze was burning him. “Flames and all?” It was a pathetic attempt to distract him … to occupy him with a game of my own until help came in the shape of my Leon. A shudder ran through me at the thought that that was what he truly was. My Leon. Purgatory or not.

  Cas chuckled and pushed away from the wall, taking a step toward me as he seemed to ponder my question. His black slacks and gray shirt were the replicas of the color of his hair and eyes, and that ring on his finger gleamed in the low light of the corridor.

  “Instead of answering your question, I have a better offer to make,” he told me as he brushed his fingers over the edge of the shadows he commanded, making them shiver and twirl under his touch.

  “An offer,” I repeated. A bargain. Of course. That was what they did, Lightbringers and Shadowbringers. They bargained. So he sought to strike a bargain with me.

  “If you dearly would like to know about hell,” he said, his lips curling at one side, “How about I show you.”

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  It was impossible that no one would notice us down here. It was only a matter of time, and the second another being was within sight, Cas couldn’t harm me. He couldn’t dematerialize or take my soul—however that worked—here and now with people close enough that if I screamed for my life, no one would hear me. And Leon would be back. At least, that was what I told myself when I forced a bored expression onto my features.

  “I think I’ll pass,” I informed him sourly and folded my arms over my chest, pondering my chances, wondering what he would do if I simply started walking.

  Would he attack? End me for my daring? Or would he simply restrain me?

  A glance at his beautiful face told me that it didn’t matter what I tried; his mind was set. He was going to take my soul. So that meant that if everything was already lost, I could bet everything on one card and try.

  “Nice chatting with you, demon,” I said and inclined my head in a mock display of manners before I spun to the side and started walking.

  One step … two … three … I made it all but five steps before his voice sounded right by my ear, making me half-trip over my own feet as I leapt away.

  “The pleasure was all mine, Miss Laney.”

  Somehow, he managed
to rush a shiver over my neck—not the panicky type but one of ambivalent excitement.

  His arm caught me right as I was close to hitting the side of the stairs again, and he still held a quiet grin as he set me back on my feet. His hand didn’t linger where he had hooked it around my waist but darted back into his pocket, his grin turning into an expression of utter boredom.

  “So, you and the Lightbringer…” He started walking, apparently so confident I wouldn’t run that he didn’t check over his shoulder to see if I was following.

  “What does that have to do with anything?” I neither confirmed nor denied his assumption. Let him think what he may. Anything that kept his mind occupied was good. It would buy me that time—

  I realized I was walking when I caught up with Cas and he heeded me a brief glance that seemed to hold the secrets of the universe.

  “Where are we going?” I demanded, feeling my body move as if on its own accord. Except, it wasn’t. It was I who was setting each step, struggling to accept that I was following the Shadowbringer around like a lost puppy.

  “I don’t know where you are going,” he said with cool boredom. “Now that your Lightbringer has secured the soul, there is no need for either of us to go anywhere.”

  With shock, I realized that the ache in my chest had subsided.

  “You felt it?” I blurted out. “You felt it and didn’t go after it?”

  He gave me a hellish grin. “I couldn’t pass on the opportunity to spend some time with you, could I?”

  I snorted. He most certainly couldn’t. “What type of Shadowbringer are you?” I scolded him for a reason that wasn’t exactly obvious to me, but somehow it seemed him neglecting his duties bothered me.

  To my surprise, he didn’t have a wicked response for me but quickened his pace, no longer seeming in the mood to play.

  “Make sure to tell your Lightbringer everything when he returns.” He turned onto the stairs and was already jogging up when the bell rang, the shadows around me drifting after him, freeing me to try, if I dared, to go after Leon. But where to? The tug had stopped, and I was stranded alone in the side-corridor now that the Shadowbringer had released me.

  “Thank God you’re all right.” Leon ran up to me from the shadow under the stairs and wrung his arms around me the second he reached me. “I was so worried.”

  My body, still stiff from the encounter with Cas, relaxed under Leon’s touch, and I slung my arms around his waist, pulling him close. “I’m all right,” I confirmed and rested my cheek against his chest as he crushed me even closer in relief.

  “I thought you were coming,” he murmured into my hair. “I could feel you starting to shift while I was still zooming out, but—” He withdrew and held me at arms-length by the shoulders, making my arms loosen so only my hands were resting on his hips. “What happened?”

  I tried not to focus on the muscles that shifted under my fingers, his skin and mine separated only by one layer of fabric.

  “Cas—” I began and his brows knitted together in horror. “No-no-no … he didn’t hurt me,” I corrected his assumption. That I was no longer myself. That I was a shell that would be seeking for the rest of her life for the missing part that a Shadowbringer stole.

  Leon’s eyes screened me from head to toe as if he wasn’t entirely convinced. “He let you go?”

  “He somehow stopped me from shifting into my ethereal form,” I explained. “I couldn’t travel.”

  Leon’s frown deepened. “I didn’t know he could do that.”

  “Apparently, he can.” I wasn’t sure if I was frightened by the encounter or confused. Cas had had his chance and hadn’t used it—again. He hadn’t ripped my soul from me. He had merely—

  What was it exactly that he had done?

  “He didn’t hurt me,” I whispered, trying to solve the riddle in my head.

  “So if he didn’t take your soul, if he didn’t hurt you … what did he want?” Leon’s tone and turned from concerned to suspicious. “Why does he track you down in the darkest corner of the school, keeping you from joining me for our mission just to … talk to you?” he suggested.

  “No idea.” I shrugged at him and curled my fingers around his hips, pulling myself tighter to him—to safety. “I’m glad you’re back.” I meant it. Also, I no longer cared what he had or hadn’t kept a secret. He was my Leon.

  I was glad to know Leon had delivered the soul that had called us safely to heaven. Whoever it was, it had been their lucky day that Cas had been occupied with me and had refrained from claiming the soul for even a couple of days in his realm.

  Leon had dropped me off at the classroom and kissed the top of my head, an apology on his lips, and went to his own classroom. One hour apart, and we’d be together for lunch again.

  Cas gave me a wide grin from the back of the room as I entered, murmuring an excuse to the teacher and hurrying to my chair, making it difficult to set one foot before the other without the memory of his shadows enclosing me. I gave him a glare that suggested he should return to hell.

  By the window, Jo raised her eyebrows as she noticed the silent exchange.

  “Where have you been?” she wanted to know in a whisper as I sat down beside her. “And does Mr. Ferham have anything to do with it?” There was an impish quality to the way she beamed at me.

  “Bathroom,” I answered briefly, fighting the itch to turn and stick my tongue out at the Shadowbringer. “And no.”

  Jo only nodded, not fully convinced. “You’re sitting with me for lunch today.” And that was all she had to say to me for the rest of a long, exhausting hour, during which I was torn between Jo’s occasional grin, Avery’s glares, and that sensation in my stomach that just wouldn’t settle—that my encounter with the Shadowbringer hadn’t been the last of its kind.

  So when the bell rang, I collected all the courage I had been building up over the forty minutes since I’d had the idea, swallowed my nervousness, and stalked down the aisle right to Cas’s table.

  I placed one hand on the book he was about to close and braced myself for his stare.

  He didn’t disappoint. In reflex, his eyes locked on mine, surprise wiped away in an instant by a lazy grin.

  “You”—I pointed a finger at him before he could open his mouth to speak—“will stay away from me.”

  It was really all I had to say. All I had hoped I would get out without vomiting my guts onto his desk from nervousness. And the words came out just fine. Even if they hadn’t been more than a hiss. So I didn’t push my luck and turned around, stalking toward where Jo was waiting by her desk, watching, flabbergasted by my sudden hostility toward the new student.

  “Don’t ask,” was all I said, anxious my knees would give way if I stopped for a moment to explain, and led the way to the door.

  Once in the cafeteria, I sorted my lunch on a tray and waited for the line to move so I could pay and sit. Leon and Jo were with me—Leon making good on his promise to be there the second I left the classroom and Jo calling in what she had claimed during the lesson.

  “So what did Lucas do to upset you so much?” Jo asked as we made it to our table in the corner.

  I didn’t even try to search the room for Cas for fear he would take the opportunity and publicly tear me apart. It had been bold of me to assault him like that, but also, it had felt like a good idea at that time when now … well, now I felt as if it would fall back on my head at some point.

  “What did she do?” Leon asked with what could be fake or real alarm.

  Jo snickered. “She said something to him. I don’t know what, but it looked serious.”

  I shook my head at Leon, warning him not to do the protective Lightbringer thing in front of everyone, and laid a hand on the tan skin of his forearm where he had rolled up his sleeve halfway.

  His eyes darted down to where our skin met and back up to my face, a silent question in them.

  I simply shrugged, savoring the warmth beneath my palm.

  “He annoyed me
the last time I spoke to him,” I told Jo truthfully.

  Jo raised an eyebrow. “Well, now you certainly annoyed Avery,” she concluded and jerked her chin in the direction of the entrance where I automatically looked—

  And found Avery glaring at me, her fiery hair reminding me of the flames I supposed Cas used to warm his pretty little home. Her minions weren’t beside her as usual. Instead, Lucas Ferham had taken the spot to her right, offering an arm to lead her into the line of students waiting for their lunch. Avery gave me a sneer and looped her hand around his arm, oblivious that she was dancing with the devil.

  Devil—

  I was wondering if that was what he truly was. Just disguised as something more human. From the books Leon had brought from his cabin, I knew that there were plenty of Shadowbringers, the same as Lightbringers. But maybe that was the whole point...

  Maybe there was no such thing as one devil. Maybe those Shadowbringers combined made that devil.

  Or was he a demon? Was he not only the one delivering souls but also torturing them? Was that how bad he was beneath that facade of beauty?

  “You look like you’re going to scream,” Leon whispered in my ear, brushing his lips against my hair, letting it pass as a fleeting kiss.

  Jo cleared her throat on the other side of the table, and I smoothed over my expression, finding sudden interest in the salad I had accumulated on a plate on my tray.

  “Actually—” I remembered I had wanted to talk to Jo about something else entirely. “Could you fetch me a soda, Leon?” I gave him a significant look that I hoped he would understand for what it was; a plea to give me a moment with Jo.

  He nodded and got to his feet, dragging his arm from under my hand with what seemed to be reluctance.

  I waited until he had turned his back then opened my mouth to speak, but Jo was faster.

  “You are an item, aren’t you?” she babbled. “The two of you have been so secretive in the past weeks that it is hardly possible to get you alone for a second.”

  I considered checking for Leon, who had to be standing in line near the Shadowbringer, but thought better of it.