by Erin Trejo
“I don’t play games. I don’t fuckin’ like liars either!” Growling at the rest of them, a guy steps forward with another bag.
“This is the rest!” Nervous. I fucking love when they get nervous. I like how they think they can fuck me over on the first drop. Fucking idiots. I nod for Devil to get the bag and check it.
“Looks like it’s all here, Ghost,” He says. I lower my hand, sliding the knife back into its respectable place. With my clenched hand, I slam my fist into Tony’s face. The crack of the bone beneath my hand sends power surging through me.
“You ever try to short change me again, you will die.” Tossing him to the ground, I take a step back.
“Toss them that shit and let’s go.” I roar. Devil tosses the bag of drugs over, watching it land on the ground next to Tony.
“Let’s get the fuck out of here.” Slapping Devil across the chest, I head for my bike when I hear the shots.
Ducking down, I spin around, grabbing my gun. Firing off a few shots, I look over at Devil. He seems to be in one piece. Shoving myself up, I walk straight toward them, guns blazing. “Stupid little fucks!” This is what I love to do.
“You picked the wrong motherfucker!”
My trigger finger is happy as hell that they decided to play me. Firing shots at me—not such a good idea.
Chapter 7
During the ride back, I was full of nerves. Those little bastards had us set up from the beginning. That pisses me off beyond anything I’ve ever felt. Pulling into the clubhouse, I climb off my bike still feeling the rage as it burns its way through me.
“Fuckin’ bullshit!” I roar. Slamming my helmet down on my bike, I glance over at Devil.
“Yeah, it was. I can’t believe those little fucks!” He’s as pissed as I am. Now we’re going to have to deal with local cops. Thank fuck, we got out of there when we did. We walk in the front doors, fuming from the shit they just pulled. It’s not so much that they tried to fuck us, it’s more of the fact that now we’re going to be on the police's radars. Dragon roars from the kitchen. “Get in here!” Couldn’t miss that if you tried.
Devil and I share a look before heading toward the kitchen to get this shit over with.
“I got a call into Wiley. We’ll see what the fuck comes up when he calls back. What the hell happened out there, Ghost?” Dragon asks as he runs his hand through his hair while he paces. At least he doesn’t look as pissed as I thought he would be.
“They pulled, Dragon. Went after both bags. Started shootin’ at us, we fired back.” Devil chuckles next to me, when all eyes turn to him.
“What? We killed all those motherfuckers.” Devil’s looks never change. It’s a little funny watching him like that. Shaking my head, I blow out a breath.
“We did what we had to do, Dragon. They fired, we handled that shit. How about next time—you check out those motherfuckers before sendin’ us into a goddamn ambush!” My nerves are firing off. I don’t know what the hell has gotten into me.
“You may be my VP, Ghost, but I’ll still fuck your world up! You want out motherfucker? Walk!” Dragon snaps, but it’s not the first time it’s happened. He always blows his shit up on me. I don’t respond. I stand there chuckling like a kid. Pissing him off a little further.
“Glad you’re ok. Both of you,” Dragon’s tone calms before he stomps out of the room. It’s almost funny to see him like that.
“You pissed him the fuck off, Ghost.” Devil chuckles before lighting up a joint.
“Don’t I always?” Turning to head out of the room, the phone rings.
“Bitches R' Us. What can I do to piss you off today?” I answer. Devil explodes into laughter but the tears on the other end–are what tug at my heart.
“Please don’t hang up, Ghost,” Mel says on the other line. I scrub my hand over my face, knowing it’s her.
“You can’t keep doin’ this, Mel.” I hear her sigh on the other end. Devil slaps my shoulder before nodding toward the door. I give him a quick nod before he walks out.
“I need help, Ghost. A lot of shit has happened. I can’t get out of it.” She says, and my stomach clenches. I knew she was in trouble. She wasn’t calling for me, she needed help. Why is that pissing me off so badly? Did I want her to want me? Did I want her to call for me? To get back with me? A part of me wants to say yes, the other part knows how fucked up that is.
“I can’t do this, Mel. Maybe you should call your parents.” Her tears threaten to rip my heart out. Pulling that phone away from my ear was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. Tossing it onto the counter, I walk out. I need some space. I need some alcohol. No–I need some pussy. Sliding my phone out, I call Nessa.
“Hey, Ghost.” Nessa says when she answers. God, that voice could melt me if I’d let it.
“Can you come over here? Been a long day.” I ask. She sighs into the phone.
“I can’t right now. I’m working. I’ll be there later—.” Clicking the phone off before I can respond, I throw it against the wall. This day has been way too much for me. I can’t deal with anything else.
Amber’s voice filters through the hallway. “That’s not going to be good tomorrow.” Spinning around to look at her, she smiles. She stands in front of me in nothing but a t-shirt, that barely covers her ass. My eyes travel up and down her long, sexy legs.
“Shit, Amber.” Her eyes twinkle, as she takes a step closer to me.
“You need a friend, Ghost?” She purrs. Licking my lips, I need a lot more than that.
“I need a fuck, darlin’. A friend has no place in what I’m feelin’.” Reaching for her, she gladly falls into my arms. Grabbing the hem of her shirt, I slowly pull it over her head, not caring that we’re still in the hallway. I grab a condom out of my jeans before shoving them to the floor. In the back of my mind, I know this is wrong. In the moment, I don’t give a shit—I need this.
Ripping the condom open with my teeth, I slide it on quickly. Shoving into her, I slam her against the wall. Thrusting as deep as I can get, I feel nothing. It doesn’t even feel as good as I thought it would. My hips rotate, pressing further into her.
“Fuckin’ squeeze me, Amber,” Grunting, I rock into her. I need to feel something, anything.
“Oh, my God!” Hearing that voice—stirs everything up inside me. Turning my head, I look into the eyes of the girl that I just ripped apart. I slide out of Amber, grabbing for my jeans. I yank them up as Amber whines.
“You can’t just stop!” Amber whines as she stomps behind me, I laugh.
“You weren’t doin’ shit anyway,” I say. Nessa’s eyes are full of tears.
“Nessa–wait,” I say. Shaking her head, she walks back down the hallway. It’s not until I notice the backpack on her back that I start to realize where she was.
“You said you were workin’.” Nessa’s laugh isn’t natural. It’s forced, and pissed.
“I should have been.” She doesn’t stop walking. She continues down the hallway until I can’t take it anymore. Grabbing her arm, I pull her to a stop.
“What the hell is goin’ on, Nessa?” I ask again. Her eyes brim with tears. I hate this—I hate that I’m doing this to her. I knew it would happen, though. I knew I’d ruin this girl.
“Let me go, Ghost. Obviously–you were busy.” Shaking her arm, I won’t let go.
“I asked you to come!” I yell at her. Her eyes blaze with fury.
“So, you fucked someone else?” Damn, I didn’t think she’d be here. She said she was working.
“You just popped the fuck up. I needed someone, I fuckin’ called you!” Her face falls. It’s no longer pissed, it’s sad.
“I was going to surprise you.” I feel like a fucking asshole right now.
“I’m sorry, Nessa.” She shakes her head, turning away from me.
“Nessa, please.” Never letting go of her arm, I pull her back.
“I don’t know what’s goin’ on with me. There’s just so much shit that I can’t handle right now.” She turn
s to face me, her tears sliding down her cheeks.
“Well, I was only going to add to that—I’m pregnant.”
***
Oh, shit. Did she just say what I think she said? There’s no way. I’m always safe. I use condoms.
This can’t be—
“It can’t be mine,” I say, the words tumbling from my mouth. Her mouth drops open.
“You son of a bitch.” Her hand slams into my cheek. The burn that stays in its wake is a welcomed feeling. Nessa turns, running down the hallway. I can hear her sobbing as she runs away from me. I can’t blame her, I’d run from me, too. I drop my head, letting that play over in my mind. She can’t be pregnant with my kid.
“Ghost! You here?” Hearing Devil yelling for me, I pull myself out of that daze. No, it isn’t mine.
“Yeah!” Hollering down the hallway, I head that way thinking it might be important. I didn’t expect to see him standing there with a sobbing Nessa cradled in his arms.
“Wanna’ tell me why the fuck she’s hysterical?” Angel stands off to the side watching, but not saying a word. I drag my eyes back to Devil’s and shake my head.
“Angel, go get Roc, and take Nessa down to Aria,” Devil snaps. Angel moves quickly, taking Nessa’s sobbing body into her arms. I hate that I hurt her. I hate that she’s crying because of me, but fuck! That baby can’t be mine.I watch Angel walk away with her before Devil moves in on me.
“What the hell is goin’ on?” He’s inches from my face, pissing me off a little more.
“Not your business, Devil.” Gritting my teeth, this has nothing to do with him, or this club, for that matter. Roc walks in, taking in the extremely close proximity that Devil and I now share. “What’s goin’ on?” He asks.
“You saw her. Ask your boy here. If you laid a hand on that girl–I’ll fuckin’ kill you myself.” Devil isn’t playing, and I know it.
“I didn’t fuckin’ touch her. She said she was fuckin’ pregnant! It can’t be mine!” Snapping in his face, Devil takes a step back. I hear Roc at the same time mumbling under his breath.
“Why can’t it be yours? You been fuckin’ her for a while now!” He snaps. Devil seems more pissed about this than I am.
“I used a condom every goddamn time, man!” Roc laughs before walking over.
“Yeah, that’s never failed before.”
“Except that one time—you didn’t.” Aria stands there with her arms crossed over her chest, glaring at me.
“When was that?” I ask, testing her. Yeah, I pushed her goddamn buttons.
And, I lost.
“The party. Does that ring any fucking bells?”
Chapter 8
Running my hand through my hair, I pace the front lobby. My body is tense—I fucked up. One time, one goddamn time. That’s all it took. I should have been smarter.
“Fuck!” Screaming, I spin around, slamming my hand into the wall behind me. Devil’s hand lands on my shoulder, not so much calming me either.
“I don’t even fuckin’ know her like that, Devil.” Glancing over at him, he shrugs.
“Don’t mean shit. You’re havin’ a kid with her. You better get to know her.” His words slam into me like a fucking freight train. I’m having a kid. That’s something I don’t need. I can’t have a kid. What the hell am I supposed to do with it?
“You tryin’ to stay with her, Ghost?” Roc’s voice is grating on my nerves. He’d be a good dad, not me.
“I don’t know. I like her. I don’t love her. I don’t even know her like that.” Tugging at my hair, it’s true. I don’t love her. I haven’t even known her that long. As I pace the floor, screams pierce the room.
“DEVIL!” Angel’s cries tear into me. Devil and I connect eyes for a split second before we both take off down the hallway.
It wasn’t Angel’s cries that hurt me, it was Nessa’s. We shove our way into the room where Nessa is doubled over, holding her stomach.
“What the fuck?” The words tumble out of me; I don’t know what to do here. Devil moves up next to her. “What happened?”
“It hurts, Ghost!” Nessa cries. Roc shoves me a little to get my ass moving but I drop to her side like I should.
“What hurts? What happened?” I ask. Gripping her hand in mine, I try to calm her. Aria’s eyes are full of tears when I look over at her. “She just grabbed her stomach. She said it hurt.” She’s worried, and now, so the fuck am I.
“Devil, go get the truck out front.” I roar. Devil nods, leaping off the floor and heading out the door.
“Move!” Shoving the girls away from Nessa, something in my chest aches. I lift her in my arms, nuzzling my face into her hair.
“Everything’s gonna be ok. Shh… It’s ok.” Carrying her to the front, I wait for Devil. He needs to hurry the fuck up.
***
Dragon met me at the hospital. The other guys stayed back with the girls. They didn’t need to be here. The nurse said she might be having a miscarriage. That’s not happening. I know it’s not. As much as I don’t need this in my life, maybe it will be the little bit of light that I need in it.
“She can’t lose it,” I say shaking my head. I tug at my hair when Dragon stands.
“She won’t. She’s tough. She’ll be fine. You know a kid isn’t always a bad thing, Ghost.” Glancing over, I can see the off look in his eyes.
“You know that for sure?” I question. Dragon nods. His face grows dark, haunted even.
“I can’t talk about it right now. Just know, that havin’ a kid is the most amazin’ thing in the world. Your life will come into prospective in a way you never saw comin’. It will throw your ass into a tailspin, but you will love every goddamn minute of it.” Dragon walks away, sitting in the corner. I didn’t miss that tear in his eye. I wonder what the hell happened?
“Family of Nessa.”
“ME!” I don’t let him finish when I stalk toward him, Dragon’s on my ass.
“Is she ok? The baby?” I ask as the doctor looks between us before focusing on me. My heart slams into my ribs. Any harder and that shit would burst right through.
“Nessa is fine. She was dehydrated. That’s what caused the cramping. She needs to drink plenty of fluids, and I’d like for her to stay off her feet for a few days until she feels better. She needs to rest.” He says, relieving some of the tension that was holding me. Swallowing hard, I finally blow out the breath I was holding for so long.
“The baby?” I ask. He never said if the baby was ok. Shit!
“The baby is fine. As I said, she needs to drink more.” Nodding, the nurse steps up next to him.
“Which one of you would like to go back with her?” Dragon slaps a hand on my shoulder. When I look over at the smile on his face, I want to ask questions. Now isn’t the time, though.
“I’ll meet you back home.” Giving Dragon a quick nod, I follow the nurse into the back.
There she is—Lying on a bed, with a tube sticking out of her arm. Her eyes are puffy from crying but that doesn’t make her any less beautiful.
Chapter 9
I watched her sleep. For hours, I watched her eyes flutter with every dream that filtered through her little head. She’s perfect. She’s everything any man would ever want. And now–she’s pregnant with my baby. My child. That’s a concept I never thought about. I never thought about having kids or being a dad. I never wanted any of that in my life. Where does it fit into my life? I’m not a nine to five business suit wearing guy. I kill—I deal in illegal activities ninety-nine percent of the time. How does a kid come into this world and be better than I am? That’s one of my main concerns. I don’t want to ruin this kid the way I was.
“You have stared at me for the last twenty minutes. Are you done yet?” Nessa’s voice is scratchy from being asleep, but no less perfect.
“I was wonderin’ what you were dreamin’ about. Your eyes fluttered so beautifully.” A small smile pulls across her face. I scoot up the bed, sitting next to her.
“You d
on’t have to be involved, Ghost. That’s not why I told you.” She says, like it’s no big deal. What the hell? Did she just try to take my kid away from me before it’s even born?
“What the hell does that mean?” I snap. I need to calm myself down. She doesn’t need me all in a fury right now too, but fuck what she just said.
“You didn’t plan on kids. Neither did I.” What is she trying to say?
“So, what, you don’t want it?” I ask the obvious. Her eyes come to rest on mine. Something deeper than even I know, lurking in them.
“I thought about abortion.” My eyes widen with her words. Like fuck she will!
“No fuckin’ way in hell!” I roar. Shoving off the bed, Nessa grabs my hand.
“I said, I thought about it, Ghost. I don’t want to do it now.” I blow out a breath, thankful for that.
“I would have tied your ass to this bed for the next eight months.” I say as I try to calm myself down. Sitting back on the bed, Nessa laughs.
“I just mean—you don’t have to be a dad. I can take care of a baby by myself.” I let that run around in my head. Let her just take care of it, without me. She could do it. She’s strong enough. But is that what I really want? Could I be that kind of person that just lets her take over? It seems pretty fucked up to me. I may be an asshole, but I do have some fucking morals.
***
I’ve kept Nessa in bed just like the doctor said to. She protests every chance she can get, too.
“Can we talk?” I ask, passing Nessa the tea she asked me for, she nods.
“What do you want to talk about?” Her eyes find mine as she sips her tea. She looks a hundred times better, now that she’s hydrated.
“My mom and dad died when I was young.” Nessa’s eyes lock with mine, her chest heaving. I don’t want her pity. I don’t want her to look at me that way.
“Me and my mom were home alone one night. My dad was workin’ late. I was in my room playin’ when I heard her screamin’. I climbed under the bed and hid there. The guy killed her, right there in my room. I climbed out after he left. Laid there with her, until my dad came home.” I tell her. Tears slide down Nessa’s cheeks.