Shades Beneath (Shattered Souls Book 1)

by Chrissy Jaye

  Asher and I had sat inside it while the other three sat down to watch. He'd run me through some meditation that was supposed to help me find my well of magic, but I couldn't concentrate on the method. It was sort of like the steps Mia ran me through to help me calm down if a particularly bad panic attack was coming on, which only made me think of her and wherever she might be. My body had swelled with a sickening feeling that refused to leave my mind no matter how hard I tried to push the thought away.

  He'd tried for almost an hour, but every time I would get calmed enough to try again, the swell of guilty emotions would start back up. At one point, I'd asked if the others could leave, but Bastian had told me no. He needed to be there in case I lost control of my emotions. He didn't say why the other two needed to be there and I didn't ask after that. I was too lost in his voice. In fear I’d start drooling if he talked anymore, I’d stormed away, declaring that I was tired and in need of sleep. No one questioned me about it.

  I turned over again, smacking the pillow into shape. Again. They were awful pillows, used by too many people. Most down pillows lost their firmness after a while. I made a mental note to sass someone about it, though I didn't know who. I'd find someone to yell at. Maybe Cole. He'd realize right away that I wasn't serious. I just need to vent.

  Maybe.

  I felt something then. The hairs on the back of my neck stood on end, causing me to sit up in bed. Once I had, I felt something shake the cottage. Not hard, just a tremor. It was probably nothing. Old houses settled at night when the air was cooler.

  That’s what I told myself.

  It shook again, harder this time and for longer, this time followed by a yell down the hall before Asher crashed through the door. He was on me before I could speak.

  "We have to go. Now." He half dragged me from the bed before realizing all I had on was a pair of thin pajamas. He took one look at me before bellowing for Ford.

  He appeared in the door, a wild look in his eye. It was the most emotion I’d ever seen in him and it scared me. Asher didn't speak, just swept his hand up and down my body and then dashed out the door again as another tremor rocked the house. Ford raked a hand through his short blond hair before piercing me with a look that froze me in place.

  "This is going to be weird. Try not to panic." Great. Just what every girl wanted to hear.

  "What the hell is happening?"

  "An attack. There's a lot more we should have covered but it’s difficult to explain properly. Hold still." Before I could blink or respond, a flash of light arched off his palm and hit me in the chest. It rocked me backward, spreading from the center of my torso outward. When I looked down, instead of the pajamas I'd put on to sleep, I found myself wrapped in a fur coat and jeans, complete with snow boots, and a fuzzy hat. I stared at him with wide eyes.

  "You can make clothes?"

  "Not now. We'll talk about it later," he said, reaching for my hand, but he stopped a hairsbreadth from touching me. "Fuck!" The shout made me jump. "I'm going to strangle her when I see her." His face contorted with frustration before he called for Asher.

  The house shook again, followed by a roaring sound that whipped around us. I felt it rattle through my bones, the sound chilling every part of me despite my new warm attire. Asher dashed into the room again, nodding in approval before he swept me up into his arms.

  "We have to run," he said to me as we rushed down the hall. Just as we cleared the living room into the kitchen, the front door banged open. I wrenched my head around to see what it was and screamed.

  "Don't look!"

  But it was too late. My eyes locked with that terrible purple gaze of my nightmares. It reached for me with impossibly long arms that stretched across the room toward me. The figure didn’t so much move as it expanded toward me trying to find purchase. I felt it in my mind too, clawing at me, trying to get in. Everything blurred after that. The next thing I knew, we were in the back-garden rushing toward a glowing arch that led into the forest beyond. We hit the arch at a run and light blasted outward.

  I stumbled from Asher’s arms onto the ground, jarred as he was jerked backward. My head jumbled together as I made impact with the hard snow.

  "Break it!"

  When my head cleared, I looked up in horror as a shadow limb swirled around Asher’s leg, dragging him back toward the portal we'd just exited. A scream lodged itself in my throat, unable to escape as he was pulled further away from me. I scrambled after him, refusing to lose him to that thing. The idea of it was unbearable. I couldn’t lose anyone else. I felt something rise up within me. It grew hot in my chest and filtered into my limbs, filling me with heat and purpose. On instinct, I threw my hands forward, but nothing happened. Whatever it was inside me, it was trapped. Panic filled me as the heat fizzled out, leaving me to feel helpless.

  Ford reared up out of nowhere and slammed his hand into the archway. His palms were aglow with sickly green light as it made contact with the weathered stone. After a heartbeat, it imploded, pulling in upon itself before blasting outward again. Bits of stone rained down on me where I lay in the snow, my arm still outstretched toward Asher.

  Asher was up before the rubble finished falling, pulling me into his arms and spinning us around to face Ford and the others. Everyone was breathing hard. On the ground between us and the ruined arch was a severed limb, no longer bleeding darkness into the air. It looked like a normal arm except it was gray all over and clearly severed at the shoulder, leaking black fluid onto the snowclad ground.

  I immediately sagged forward in Asher’s arms and threw up into the snow. He smoothed hair away from my face as I heaved, while everything I'd managed to eat at dinner expelled from my stomach, which only made me heave harder. In that moment, everything was just too much.

  There was movement around me, but I couldn't pay attention to it. Exhausted, I collapsed back into Asher's chest with my eyes closed. I wanted to ask what had happened, but I didn't dare. I didn't open my eyes again until I heard someone approaching us.

  "Let’s get her inside," I heard Esper say. She looked as exhausted as I felt. Her pink skin was paler, and the flowers growing in her hair looked wilted. A few of the leaves had turned brown around the edges and her shoulders drooped. The sight of her brought out my protective side. I'd promised not to be weak and here I was, being weak again. I sat up straight, but before I could stand, Asher scooped me up. I nailed him with a glare. He met me with one of his own daring me to protest. He had a point though. I had just blown chunks. Being carried didn’t seem like such a bad idea.

  "What the fuck happened?" Ford was pacing back and forth in front of a fireplace in what I considered to be the most opulent room I'd ever seen. It was massive, with marble floors, high ceilings and windows everywhere. More importantly, the only wood in sight were doors, window frames, and the floor. Thank fuck.

  Cole snorted above me. He'd perched himself behind the sofa where I sat leaning into one arm. It took a while for Asher to let me go, no matter how many times I said I was fine. He didn't believe me until I'd finally stopped shaking, and then, only once Cole had taken up residence near me.

  When we first entered the house, it took a while to get everyone settled. Esper had greeted everyone, after pulling out a magical clipboard from thin air, and started checking off names. I’d mostly ignored the commotion as I dealt with the fact that a dead shadow thing was stalking me. Mia would have been appalled at my lack of interest in all the cool Fae shit happening.

  It was Esper who answered his question, which surprised me. "It’s possible that he’s touched her." She didn't indicate me directly, but I could tell that she meant me. "Probably been tracking her for weeks, looking for a way in." She cast me a furtive glance before continuing. "He must have found a way around the spell." The last few words came out in a gasp and she clutched at her throat. Ford moved toward her and placed a glowing palm on her neck. She gasped for breath when his hand fell away and sank onto the stone lip of the fireplace.

  I st
ared at her in shock. What the hell had just happened? I looked at Ford for an explanation, but he waved his hand at me before making sure the woman was okay. Her ears quivered as she gulped down more air and the flowers in her hair snapped in agitation.

  "She placed a spell on you," Bastian said, turning his eyes to me. They were full of sadness. "We can't say any more without our sixth present. I know we've only told you the bare minimum. It’s what we can get away with, but she was supposed to be here. This wasn't supposed to happen."

  "What wasn't supposed to happen?" I whispered. I felt tight all over. My hands were clenched into fists in my lap. My arms shook with the effort it took to keep them that way. It was the only way to keep myself from screaming. Something was happening to me and the people around me couldn’t answer. My emotions felt wild and untamable.

  Asher stepped up next to me and sank down so he could look me in the eye. His blue irises bore into mine with complete seriousness as he pulled one of my hands out of my lap and started rubbing it until my fist relaxed. Blood welled in the indents left by my fingernails.

  "The thing attacking you must have gotten close to you at some point. Maybe when you were sleeping. Do you have nightmares?" I gulped at his question. I had nightmares almost every night. The only time I didn't have them was when Bea was in control. And I had no way to ask her if she had them too.

  Cole scoffed behind me drawing Asher’s attention briefly. I knew they were communicating without speaking. I hadn't even known them for twenty-four hours and I already recognized the signs. It was annoying. When his eyes moved back to me, he started rubbing my other fist. The sensation rippled through the rest of my body, slowly ridding me of the tremors I'd been having.

  God, I loved the way his hands felt. It didn’t matter where or how he touched me. I just wanted it to never end.

  "We need to figure out a way around it. The library might have answers." Bastian stood from behind Asher and made his way out of the room. He didn't look at any of us as he left. I narrowed my eyes at his back. I did a lot of people watching. As much as they gave me anxiety, it was hard not to watch people going about their normal lives. You learned a lot about people when they didn’t know you were watching them. Everything about his posture spoke of guilt. Guilty about what though?

  "She's perceptive. Either that, or her powers are coming in swiftly," Cole said softly over my shoulder. I'd almost forgotten he was there, which made me flinch. How could I forget about him? Or the others. Still, I watched Bastian until he disappeared from sight. I didn’t even think about what Cole had said. I couldn’t. Not right now. Maybe in the morning.

  Asher used my hands to pull me up with him. "Let me show you where you can sleep," he said to me and then to Cole. "Maybe some tea to help her relax. Don't overdo it."

  He led me up a grand staircase and down a hallway. My mind was too busy puzzling over everything, trying to make the pieces fit into what I knew and what I didn't know. I needed the world to make sense. At least I understood the basics of my life living with Mia. Here, I was struggling to stay above water. And I didn't have my best friend to help me figure it out.

  What troubled me most was that even though I was freaking out, Bea wasn’t protecting me. Maybe she didn’t think I needed it, but I was starting to crave it. I wanted to check out. To let her deal with the mess she’d made. Why wasn’t I angrier at her? All my emotions were so sharp, but I couldn’t summon the will to be pissed at her. Annoyed, yes. Angry? Not anymore.

  I was tucked into a bed far too big for me and handed a cup of tea that I drank blindly before sinking down into the covers. The soft allure of jasmine and sandalwood was calling to me, begging me to relax. I didn't surface from my thoughts until Asher shut off the lights. My eyes popped open in fear and the words left my lips without me meaning to say them. I only whispered them, but he heard me anyway.

  "Don't go."

  He didn't. He crawled into the bed with me. And for the first time in my life, I sank into sleep unafraid of what the night would bring.

  Chapter Ten

  “Tell me a secret,” Asher said softly. His body was turned toward me, one hand propping his head up on the bed as he gazed at me with his deep blue eyes.

  Beautiful.

  He was heartbreakingly beautiful.

  I’d known it before but having all his attention focused on me made my breath hitch. I ached to reach out and brush the hair out of his eyes, just so I could feel the texture.

  “I don’t think I have any to tell,” I replied, looking away from him and into the swirling mists. It seemed to boil as it rolled, twisting into unrecognizable patterns. It coalesced for a moment before breaking apart. The sight of it was so familiar, like something scratching at the back of my mind, begging me to remember, but I couldn’t grasp it. The charcoal mist fascinated me though. It was like it could become anything, if only I knew how to direct it. Maybe I did, I just didn’t understand what to do with it.

  Asher’s hand reached toward my face, pulling my attention back to him as his palm cupped my cheek in his warm palm.

  “Everyone has secrets, Little Song.” He edged closer to me, tangling his legs with mine. My breathing sped up, making my chest heave as it brushed against his shirt. I watched the rise and fall of my breasts, barely contained in purple silk, relishing the feel of his body so close to mine. From the corner of my eye, I caught the wisp of a smile on his lips. He knew exactly what he was doing to me. “Tell me something you’ve never told anyone?”

  I tore my eyes away to watch the fog again. It had stalled, barely churning, like it was reacting to my anticipation. Asher used his palm to turn my face back to his, bringing my chin up so I was forced to look into his eyes. They shone with a hint of mischief and what I thought might be adoration. It didn’t make sense. His blue irises bore into my hazel ones before they dipped to my mouth and back up.

  He was going to kiss me. I could feel it building. I wanted him to so badly. There was the friction that grew between us, turning into a sweetest ache, so sharp I thought I might shatter apart if he didn’t. I wanted to be bold, to push this moment over the edge but I didn’t know how.

  “I’ve never…” My voice stalled as he moved closer, his hand drifting down my arm and along my side to rest on my hip, angling me forward. Our bodies were flush against each other making the intensity between us swell even higher.

  His breath fanned across my face as he whispered, “Never what?”

  “Wake up!”

  “Huh?” I grunted, lifting my head as my mind surfaced from sleep. I swiped at the drool on my lips, trying to make the world around me come into focus. My eyes met a pillow made of flesh and I stared at it with puzzlement for a moment until it clicked in my brain, telling me what I was seeing.

  A perfectly muscled pectoral was inches away from my face. Asher lay on his back, one arm locked around my waist. Our legs were tangled together with one of my knees trapped between his. He let out a soft snore as I stared down at his naked chest.

  “Well, this is adorable,” Cole snorted from the door. I glanced up, realizing he was the one who woke me in the first place.

  Hastily, I wiped away the rest of the drool from my mouth with the edge of the sheet before pulling myself upright, bringing the sheet with me. Something was off, but I couldn’t put my finger on it. My brain was still muddled with sleep. Asher stirred as I shifted. The soft light from the window showed a tiny river of drool on his chest which made me panic. Drooling on a guy was not sexy, or even the least bit cute. I wiped it away quickly, hoping he wouldn’t wake up fully until it was gone while Cole continued to snicker from the doorway.

  “Have a good sleep, Sunshine?”

  “Shut up, Colton.” I threw him a glare, fully fixated on staring him out of the room. It didn’t last long as I realized he was shirtless again, and equally drool-worthy as the man next to me. I felt my body flush and sent up a silent prayer that the dim room hid it, even if Cole could pluck the thought from my mind. Asher
’s arm curled around my waist, pulling me down to snuggle into his side again.

  “Hello Beautiful,” he whispered. I realized with sudden horror why something wasn’t right as the lines of his body pressed against me. I could feel his erection throb against my leg. His very naked erection that pressed into my unclad thigh. Heat and mortification flared through me in equal measure.

  “Now who’s the one embarrassing her?” I heard from the doorway. It dripped with sarcasm and a quick glance at Cole confirmed he was enjoying the scene in front of him. At least he did until he caught sight of my face. His expression morphed to one of concern, his mouth opening up to speak, but before he could, a pillow from the bed flew through the air, smacking him in the face. Another one quickly followed before he ducked out of the open doorway.

  “Ignore him, he likes to tease everyone.”

  I didn’t speak. I wasn’t capable of it. Asher nuzzled his face into my hair as his other arm wrapped around me. Could someone combust? The heat wasn’t going anywhere.

  He stiffened beside me before he sat up and stared down at me. I blinked at him as he scrutinized my face.

  “We didn’t…” His voice trailed off before he surged off the bed, dragging the blanket with him as he went. He was already to the door when he started yelling. “Ford, I’m going to murder you!”

  I sat up stunned by his abrupt departure. He hadn’t even spared me a look as he left, flying through the door and down the hall. His feet pounded in the corridor, making the door rattle in its frame. After a few moments, Cole came back to stand in the doorway. One look at me and he balked before spinning and flying down the hall in the same direction as Asher.

  My mind was still stuck on the feel of his naked body against mine and the sudden need that had filled me. But that wasn’t right, not exactly. I’d felt it when I woke up next to him, like the tickle of a dream that I couldn’t remember.