DADDY ISSUES: A SINGLE DAD ROMANCE

by Morris, Liv

  The best part of the day was watching Lucas build the bizarre crib. It resembled a space pod for alien spawns, but it was the only thing I could order for an overnight delivery. He cursed and mumbled through Operation Build a Crib until it was in one piece. I was pretty sure he’d never put together anything from IKEA. He’d never make it past the first step.

  I placed a cloth diaper, part of the haul from yesterday, over my shoulder. I didn’t want to get my T-shirt dirty in case Esmé spit up when I burped her. It was the last clean shirt I’d brought with me. It had No Drama Llama in white on the front with a Llama wearing glasses and holding up a hoof to form a finger-like peace sign. The T-shirt color matched my eyes. Add a pair of torn-up, ridden-hard skinny jeans, and no one would guess I was a billionaire’s nanny. I couldn’t wait to greet the doorman downstairs in this outfit. Nothing like adding some spice to the building.

  I heard footsteps coming down the hallway before Lucas and a man, who had to be his assistant, came into view. Lucas held his head high, his eyes of blue steel boring into me. I’d never seen this side of Lucas, the billionaire titan in pure business mode. He was nothing like Herb, but I wouldn’t complain about it either.

  Strength radiated from him, along with how divinely he wore his suit. His tall, muscular body was built for the look. It made him stand out against all the suited men in Manhattan. He resembled a Wall Street Viking with his disheveled, dirty blond sex hair.

  “Your daddy is dreamy,” I whispered in Esmé’s ear as I tried to burp her on my shoulder. She cooed back as if she already knew.

  “Ms. Talbot,” Lucas said as he and the man stopped in front of me.

  I narrowed my eyes at Lucas, wondering why he was being so formal. I thought we’d moved past this. Then he winked at me so fast, I wasn’t sure if it even happened. But I didn’t miss the slight uptick at the corner of his mouth. I guess I needed to play along.

  “This is Jared Johnston, my PA. He will coordinate the transformation of the former service room into an appropriate nursery.”

  “Good morning, Ms. Talbot.” Jared stretched a hand out to me, but I had the baby on my shoulder. I didn’t have a hand free, so he stuffed his hand back into his pants pocket and cleared his throat. Awkward.

  “You can call her Maggie,” Lucas said before I could return Jared’s greeting.

  Lucas either let formalities slide for his hired help or he was letting his jerk flag fly today. Probably both. I rolled my eyes at him. He responded by raising a brow. Whatever.

  “Yes, sir,” Jared replied, sounding like he had a stick lodged where the sun didn’t shine.

  That was the proper way a southern woman addressed such matters. The ladies from Steel Magnolias would be proud. Though, rebel Ouiser would’ve said ass without blinking an eye. She’d always been my favorite too.

  “Do I have to call him Mr. Johnston, or will J.J. be okay?” Jared flinched at my made-up nickname for him.

  “Jared is acceptable,” he said, the stick lodged a bit higher. J.J. it would be. This could be fun.

  “Got it, J.J.” Esmé released a burp worthy of a drunken sailor, giving my reply a perfect exclamation point.

  “Um, I need to speak with you for a moment, Mag—Miss Talbot. In private,” Lucas said, leading me to one conclusion; this conversation wouldn’t include J.J. Pity.

  “Yes, Mr. Shaw?” I said his name like it was drudgery to do as he bid. He shook his head, scolding me with a look. I gave him an innocent shrug.

  J.J.’s face didn’t hide the shock of how I interacted with Lucas. He had a lot to learn about me. I spoke my mind. I rose from the chair, walking toward J.J.

  “This is Esmé.” I lifted her up in the crook of my elbow so he had a better view. J.J.’s mouth formed an O, or he silently said wow. I wasn’t sure. But I was sure of one thing, Esmé’s eyes were a dead giveaway that Lucas was her father—and J.J. knew it too.

  “Yes, here’s the baby,” Lucas said with all the warmth of a glacier. What is his problem?

  “I’m going to let you get better acquainted with the baby, J.J.” I placed Esmé in J.J.’s arms, helping him hold her securely. He had a slight tremor in his hands, and from the look on his face, I wasn’t sure he’d ever been more scared in his life.

  “This is in case she loses her breakfast.” I laid the cloth diaper over his shoulder and gave it a little pat. “Have fun.”

  “Um…” J.J. muttered as brown eyes darted from me to the baby. He was earning his pay and then some.

  “My office. Now,” Lucas whispered into my ear.

  His words and close proximity gave me a warm rush in all the right places—or wrong ones since we’d agreed to be “just friends,” which was my least favorite f-word at the moment.

  I almost preferred fighting with him as my foe. I got to see his passion when he was angry. Maybe that was why I acted this way toward his assistant. I wanted Lucas mad at me. The subconscious wanted what it wanted. Sorry, Selena Gomez for twisting your song, but psych majors dealt with the mind, not the heart. And this man knew how to flip my switch.

  “Yes, sir.” I toned down my attitude, sounding more like a submissive scolded by her Dom.

  I passed by Lucas, heading to his office down the hallway. He trailed right behind me, giving my ass a tap as we left J.J.’s sight. I wanted to tell him most friends didn’t go around spanking each other, but I wasn’t about to complain. I loved it.

  I peeked over my shoulder as I entered his office. Lucas’s eyes had darkened, like this morning when he stood by the bed, his icy blues smoldering at me.

  Lucas shut the door, leaning against it and crossing his arms over his chest. His pointed glare told me one thing, I was being a bad girl and he was about to set me straight. Awesome news. Truly.

  “Nice shirt.” His remark wasn’t a compliment.

  “Thanks. The sunglasses give the llama a cool vibe, don’t you think?”

  “Have a seat.” Lucas’s lips formed a straight line. He was giving nothing away.

  I plopped down in the closest chair and put my feet up on the edge of his desk. I was wearing my fancy sequined Crocs again. They fit into the surroundings of his plush office perfectly.

  He glanced at my sandals, then narrowed his eyes at me. Ground control, Magnolia Talbot pushed Lucas’s buttons. I wondered if Lucas might give me another round of corporal punishment.

  “Were you raised in a barn?” Lucas asked, his gazed still pointed hard at me.

  I couldn’t stop from smiling at his question. My mother had a genuine hen house so she could serve fresh eggs at her bed-and-breakfast.

  “Kind of.” I dropped my feet to the floor, and he leaned against the desk where I’d just had my sandals. His legs stretched out for miles, crossing at the ankles. In this position, I couldn’t miss his nicely defined thighs. Strong and athletic…and distracting.

  “You’re familiar with the term pecking order, right?” he asked, his long fingers gripping the edge of the desk.

  “Sure.” I nodded, uncertain where he was going with this.

  “Good. I’m paying you to take care of the baby. Correct?”

  “Attorney Shaw, I’m enjoying your cross-examination.”

  Lucas grabbed the leather arms of my chair, making me jump. He leaned forward, towering over me, caging me in. I got a heavy dose of his cologne and held in a groan. He smelled good enough to lick. Why couldn’t he forget about the stupid buddy system we agreed on? Barclay would get over it. After all, Lucas and I were consenting adults.

  “I have certain expectations from those I employ. Manners.” He glanced down at my feet. “But respecting me is the main one.”

  “I get it.” I puffed my chest out, trying to put on a tough front. Though, my “no drama llama” boobs made me seem like a sassy teenager compared to his commanding Wall Street look.

  “Do I scare you?” Lucas’s voice was deep and gruff.

  “Maybe?” I squirmed in my chair, completely turned on by his intensity. Liking his
anger couldn’t be healthy, but I’d worry about that later.

  “The only way for me to control an ambitious personality like Jared is through intimidation.” Lucas pushed off the chair and walked behind his desk. It was like a wall between us, releasing some of the tension in the air.

  “Are you even listening to me, Maggie?”

  The answer was no, since the manly part of Lucas had my attention more than his words. I blamed it on his perfectly messy hair, broad shoulders, and that insanely cut jawline. And I forgot my name when he looked at me with those nuclear blue eyes. They were deadly.

  “I’m all yours.” Every pun imaginable was intended.

  “Good. Back to my expectations.” I nodded, acting like I had a clue what he was talking about. “When Jared arrived for his first interview, he was already planning how to redecorate my office once he had my job. I wanted someone with his desire to succeed, but I had to contain it. So I keep him guessing and never feeling one hundred percent confident about his job status or my approval of him. I pay him more than is necessary. That’s his reward.”

  Interesting. He was paying me way more than was necessary too. Was I supposed to feel the same way as Jared? Unsure if Mary Poppins was going to show up and take over?

  “I’ve messed up already, haven’t I?” He shrugged. Yikes. I wasn’t expecting that response from him. “Okay. Tell me what you want from me.”

  “I’d rather not address what I want.” Lucas cleared his throat, straightening his tie. “I need you to stop all the backtalk and attitude when you’re around Jared, or anyone else in public.”

  “I’ll try.” Promising him anything else would be a lie, especially while a corporate climber watched over me.

  “Start by helping him. He has no clue what a baby needs, and I sure as hell am no assistance.”

  “Do we have a spending limit?”

  “You’re kidding, right?” He laughed. I shook my head. My mother raised me by herself, so shopping without a budget was a foreign concept. It made me nervous.

  “Buy whatever you need. Now, go relieve Jared. I have to prepare for a meeting.”

  Lucas bent over his desk, his brows furrowed, focusing solely on his computer screen. I’d been dismissed without an upward glance. He moved on to another task in his day, checking Esmé and me off his list.

  Whatever. I refused to let his rejection hurt me. I was his employee after all. Besides, J.J. was probably standing outside the office, waiting to toss the baby back in my arms. When I opened the door, I heard laughter coming from the main living area. When I walked in to see what was going on, I couldn’t believe my eyes.

  Esmé had wrapped her fingers around J.J.’s power tie and was yanking on it hard, turning it into a baby lasso.

  “No, Esmé, no,” he cried out, pretending to be upset. Esmé reacted with the cutest giggle, followed by J.J. beaming right back at her.

  Well, what do you know?

  “Hey,” I called out. J.J. glanced up at me, all smiles. I didn’t recognize this version of him. Hadn’t even imagined anything but a stuck-up smirk could reside on his face. “What happened to Lucas’s PA? I swore I left the baby with him.”

  “I think I’m in love.” Esmé pulled his tie, and he made her giggle again. I couldn’t help it and started laughing too. They were so cute together.

  It was too bad Lucas didn’t let go with Esmé like this. She was such a sweet, good-natured baby compared to others I’d babysat. But one thing really bothered me, Lucas hadn’t held her or touched her once since I’d arrived on Saturday night.

  DNA proved he was her father, but did he know how to be her dad? I believed something major in his past kept him from opening his heart to his child. It was my wannabe-psychologist guess. He needed help finding his way. Since I had no idea where the hurt came from, I had to be gentle and not push too hard, or he’d withdraw back into himself.

  A crazy idea popped into my head I thought might actually work. All I had to do was find a lifelike baby doll in this city.

  “Let’s go, you two. Baby Depot opens at eight thirty.”

  I grabbed the diaper bag and car seat. J.J. followed me out of the apartment with the baby in his arms and hopefully Lucas’s credit card in his wallet. I planned on putting it to good use today.

  25

  Lucas

  I destroyed my family twenty years ago. I was a seventeen-year-old jackass who knew his good looks and money would open life’s doors and girls’ legs. I attended an elite boarding school in Massachusetts, hanging out with kids whose families were written about in history books.

  Girls pushed each other out of the way to sleep with me. Guys wanted to be my friends, mostly to have a chance with the girls I didn’t take to bed. My attendance at a party determined its success or failure. I was the “it” guy on campus with my nose stuck up so high in the air, I didn’t know where I was going.

  Funny thing about being on top of the mountain with the wind at your back? There’s only one place to go—down. And my fall resembled an avalanche as the ground I stood on disappeared under me.

  During Christmas break my junior year in high school, my family stayed at our estate in Vermont. Snow covered the hundred-acre grounds. Restless from being cooped up in the house, I talked my parents into taking the snowmobiles out for a late afternoon ride.

  My mother and I rode together on one. My father and sister paced behind us on theirs. I’d begged my mother to pull over and let me drive. I hated sitting in the back seat.

  Finally, my persistence paid off and she relented, even though I hadn’t passed the required safety course. She warned me to keep my speed down and stay on the normal path.

  I did neither. What happened after I took control would haunt me forever—has haunted me since that day.

  I guided the snowmobile a few feet off the usual path, thinking it would still be safe. Then I saw a small mound of snow piled ahead of us. Instead of doing the smart thing and returning to the normal route, I accelerated the engine and aimed smack dab for it.

  Right before we cruised over the mound, my mother screamed at me. The piercing sound of terror in her voice still visited me in my nightmares. I tried to turn the snowmobile, but it was too late. There was a jarring stop to our forward motion when we hit a tree stump buried in the snow. The crashing sound echoed in the quiet woods. We flew through the air in separate directions. I could still close my eyes and picture the scene in slow motion. The endless reel tortured my mind, but I deserved the punishment.

  My father came upon the wreck seconds later, or so he told me. I was dazed from the crash and calling out for my mother, but she didn’t answer.

  Twirling red lights from the ambulances filled the snow-covered grounds like a horror movie. Later in the night, after the hospital ran every possible test on me, a doctor released me to go home. He said I was lucky to land in the fresh-fallen snow. I asked him how my mother was, and his eyes had turned toward the floor. He told me my father was outside the door. I gathered the snow gear I had on when I’d arrived and met my father.

  I’d hardly recognized him. His shoulders had been slumped, as if he carried the weight of the world. The usual fire in his brown eyes had been reduced to lifeless mud. He’d aged ten years in a few hours.

  I’d wanted to ask him about my mother, but I was too scared to hear his answer. I’d already known it wasn’t good news. The man I’d known for seventeen years had disappeared.

  My father had been silent as we’d followed the exit signs down the white-tiled floors. Why were we leaving? I’d feared my mother was dead—and she was in so many ways.

  When we’d pushed through the doors leading to the waiting area for the ER, he’d pulled me to a stop. I’d noticed our cook and housekeeper standing near the outside exit.

  He told me a helicopter was flying in from Boston to take my mother to a trauma hospital. Her helmet had a dent in it and she was unconscious.

  Trees had been scattered off the path, so I’d assumed her hea
d had hit one of them. The blame laid at my feet, but no one knew I had been the one behind the controls.

  “Mr. Shaw.” Hearing my name, I jumped back to reality. The woman filling in for Father’s assistant called out my name. I wished Vanessa wasn’t on vacation. I could’ve really used her smiles before entering the lion’s den. “Your father will see you now.”

  I’d been sitting on a chair too small for my large build for an hour, waiting. I didn’t want to be comfortable, though. I needed to feel everything today. I watched company attorneys march into the office ahead of me. I had to keep my head in the game, because no matter what my father threw at me, I planned on winning in the end. It might look like a defeat to him, but we had different goals in life, and mine had never been clearer.

  I took a deep breath and said a silent prayer, as if anyone would listen to it, then I opened the door and walked inside my father’s office.

  My father occupied center stage sitting behind his behemoth desk. He didn’t stand or say hello. Instead, he greeted me with a sneer. His attorneys filled every available seat, except the one in front of my father’s desk.

  I preferred standing, but decided to take the only seat open. Papers ruffled around me as the attorneys prepared for battle.

  “Lucas, you know why we called you here today?” my father finally spoke. His fingers formed a steeple.

  “Actually, Father, it could be for several reasons. Please enlighten me.” I relaxed back into the chair, wondering what he would bring up first. The hopes of a buyout or the baby.

  “Let’s start with the child.” I figured this would be his first topic. Once the media broke the news, Iron Gate was dragged into the scandal, hitting our stock prices hard. “Is she yours?”

  “She is.” I heard a gasp from an attorney. My father shook his head. He added this disappointment to the list of ones he’d never forgive.

  “My team will make it go away. Just like Meredith. How much will it take?” Good old Dad had brought his checkbook to the meeting.