The Naughtiest Unicorn at Christmas

by Pip Bird

  ‘Raheem, what are you strapping to your back?’ said Miss Glitterhorn.

  ‘Metre sticks!’ Raheem said. ‘For measuring the tree. So we can make sure it’s the perfect size. I thought I’d bring five?’

  ‘I think two will be quite enough,’ said Miss Glitterhorn.

  A few moments later, Class Red went outside, mounted their unicorns and rode towards the Fearsome Forest. The sun shone brightly in the clear sky, making the snow sparkle even more. Mira gave a little shiver, not sure if it was the cold or the excitement. The crunching of hooves in the snow and the sight of everyone’s breath in the chilly air somehow made this quest even more magical.

  They made their way across the paddock, the unicorns picking up their feet more than usual, as their hooves sank into the snow. They seemed grateful for their cosy Christmas jumpers. Mira had brought one of her dad’s jumpers from home that had a big picture of a doughnut on it and ‘DOUGHNUT WORRY, BE HAPPY’, which she thought was perfect for Dave. He seemed very happy in it, even though it was a bit big.

  Mira trotted along on Dave and gave him a scratch behind the ears. Dave did a happy fart. There really was nothing like going on a quest with your UBFF !

  ‘Oh look,’ said Miss Glitterhorn. ‘There are some lovely trees just by the entrance to the forest. How convenient!’

  ‘Hmm,’ said Darcy, getting to the clump of pine trees and inspecting them. ‘They are nice – but are they the best we can do?’

  ‘Well I think that one is excellent,’ said Miss Glitterhorn, pointing to a tree at the corner of the clump that was slightly taller than the others.

  ‘It’s very green,’ said Tamsin. ‘But I feel like the perfect tree would be even greener?’

  Seb trotted over to the tree on Firework and sniffed it. ‘It doesn’t smell Christmassy enough,’ he said.

  The other children agreed that they could do better than those trees and they needed to go further into the forest. Miss Glitterhorn gave a loud sigh.

  As they headed into the forest, the branches of the tall trees hung above their heads, casting shadows on the snowy path. The forest was quiet, apart from the occasional sound of snow sliding off branches on to the ground.

  Next to Mira and Dave, Raheem’s unicorn Brave was flicking his head from side to side. Mira knew he was keeping an eye out for sparkle spiders, which he was really scared of.

  Raheem was calming Brave down like he always did. But Mira saw that Raheem seemed distracted, and even more anxious than usual.

  Miss Glitterhorn kept pointing out ‘perfectly good trees’, but Class Red felt that perfectly good wasn’t perfect, and there must be so many great trees they hadn’t seen. So further into the forest they went.

  After about an hour, Miss Glitterhorn looked at her watch. ‘We really need to get back,’ she said. ‘So I am afraid that the next perfectly good tree we see will need to be –’

  ‘FOUND IT!’ came shouts from up ahead. It was Darcy and Flo.

  ‘Thank goodness,’ sighed Miss Glitterhorn.

  Miss Glitterhorn and her unicorn, Heathcliff, were at the back of the group with Mira and Dave. Dave’s little legs meant he was often a lot slower than the other unicorns.

  ‘Now we just need to chant the Perfect Tree Spell,’ called Miss Glitterhorn as they approached the clearing where the shouts had come from. ‘The spell will pop the tree out of the ground and a couple of the unicorns can carry it back and – oh my word, it’s enormous!’

  Mira looked up as she entered the clearing. The tree was beautifully bushy, with lots of shiny needles and a thick trunk, and lots of space underneath for them to perform. There was no denying it – it was the Perfect Tree.

  And it was also massive.

  ‘I think we’ll keep looking, Class Red –’ began Miss Glitterhorn, but she was too late. The class were all chanting the Perfect Tree Spell.

  The massive tree creaked and groaned and began to tilt. Children and unicorns scattered. The tree hit the ground with a thundering crash that sent shudders throughout the forest. A heap of snow slid from a nearby branch and landed neatly on Miss Glitterhorn’s head.

  Class Red moved slowly back through the Fearsome Forest in the direction of Unicorn School. Miss Glitterhorn had brought some harnesses, and so all the unicorns were hooked up to the Perfect Massive Tree and were pulling it along slowly like reindeer pulling a sleigh.

  Mira and Dave were walking next to Raheem and Brave, with Darcy and Star on the other side.

  ‘Are you feeling okay, Raheem?’ Mira asked.

  Raheem fiddled with Brave’s mane. ‘It’s just . . . it’s just this play,’ he said. ‘You know how our parents are coming to see it?’

  Mira nodded. She’d rung her mum and dad that morning and shouted, ‘I’m the Worm!’ They were a bit confused at first, but they said they were so pleased for her, especially when she told them she was appearing in every scene!

  ‘My mum’s SO excited that I’m going to be the narrator,’ said Raheem. ‘She’s told all her friends. And my sister’s excited too, even though she can’t come and watch. Mum sent me a picture she drew.’

  He showed Mira and Darcy the picture on his phone. It was a drawing of Raheem, and underneath it said MY BROTHER – SOOPER NARAYTOR.

  ‘Mum’s going to film it all for her,’ said Raheem. ‘I just think they’ll be so disappointed when they realise I can’t even speak in front of people.’

  ‘I’m sure you’ll be able to do it,’ said Mira. ‘Your sister thinks so too!’

  Raheem looked even more miserable. ‘The only time I ever enjoy reading out loud is when I read stories to Tia. But the thought of speaking in front of EVERYONE makes my tummy feel funny.’

  ‘It’s just volume,’ said Darcy. ‘We’ll turn you up!’

  ‘I don’t know what that means,’ said Raheem.

  ‘You’re fine saying the lines,’ explained Darcy. ‘So we just need to turn your volume up. I’ll show you.’

  ‘Okay,’ said Raheem, looking over at Mira, who shrugged.

  ‘Repeat after me,’ said Darcy. ‘Hooves. Mane. Tail. Horn. What does that make? Unicorn!’

  ‘Hooves. Mane. Tail. Horn. What does that make? Unicorn,’ said Raheem quietly.

  ‘Hooves. Mane. Tail. Horn. What does that make? Unicorn!’ said Darcy, a little bit louder this time.

  Raheem repeated it, and Darcy said it again, and they kept going back and forth, getting a bit louder each time. Mira joined in with Darcy. Their unicorns began to snort and whinny along, and even Dave farted in time with the chant. Raheem was getting so into the song that he didn’t seem to have noticed that his voice had got louder and louder.

  ‘Hooves. Mane. Tail. Horn. What does that make? UNICORN!’ Raheem yelled at the top of his voice. Dave accompanied him with a fart so deafening it sounded like a giant explosion. It was so loud that all the unicorns were startled and some of the children screamed. Everyone stopped abruptly, and Miss Glitterhorn nearly fell off Heathcliff. The trees around them shook.

  Then, in the distance, they heard a rumbling sound. The ground began to tremble. Just ahead of them, a huge pile of snow tumbled down from a rocky outcrop.

  ‘A load of snow has fallen on to the path. It’s completely blocked!’ called Jake from the front of the group.

  Mira peered over the heads of her classmates and their unicorns. A gigantic mound of snow rose up in front of them. It was almost as high as the top of the tall trees.

  How were they going to get back?

  Class Red were silent as they unhooked the harnesses from their unicorns. They were right on the edge of the forest and SO close to the school, but in order to get back they were going to have to climb up and over the giant mound of snow. There was no way the unicorns could pull the Perfect Massive Tree as well, so they’d have to leave it behind.

  ‘Is everyone ready to go?’ said Miss Glitterhorn.

  ‘Nearly!’ said Mira. She was struggling to get Dave out of his harness, which had got tangled
in the arms of Mira’s dad’s jumper. Raheem went to help.

  Darcy rode Star over to their teacher. ‘Miss Glitterhorn,’ she said. ‘We just want to have a moment with the tree. To say goodbye.’

  Star walked solemnly over to the Perfect Massive Tree. The other children and unicorns followed, their heads bowed.

  Mira sighed as she struggled with the harness. She wished they weren’t going back empty-handed. Just on the other side of the giant snow mound, everything would be set up for the Snow Unicorn celebrations. She thought she could just about make out the sound of cheerful voices. And there was a smell in the air . . . it was very faint, but – yes, she could definitely smell hot chocolate.

  There was a snort. Dave’s ears pricked up and his nostrils twitched. And Mira saw a crazed look enter his eyes as he inhaled the sweet chocolatey smell too.

  ‘Um, Dave . . .’ she said.

  Dave shot forward, but he was still attached to his harness. The harness rope went tight. The rope strained. Dave’s little legs were moving so fast that showers of snow flew up around him.

  And then the Perfect Massive Tree began to move. Slowly at first, and then it started sliding quickly through the snow.

  ‘GRAB ON!’ shouted Mira, scrambling on to Dave’s back.

  All the children and unicorns leaped towards the tree and held on to branches and harness ropes. Darcy ended up clinging to the trunk. Miss Glitterhorn was holding on to Heathcliff ’s leg.

  As Dave began to climb the snow mound, he slowed down a bit.

  But then the other unicorns surged forward as they all caught the scent of the hot chocolate. Some managed to slip back into their harnesses. Others pulled the ropes with their teeth. And now the Perfect Massive Tree began to move up the icy slope!

  Raheem bumped along behind Mira with his arms and legs wrapped around Brave and his eyes squeezed shut. He was saying something, but Mira couldn’t hear him over the whooshing of the tree through the snow.

  ‘What?’ she called to him.

  Raheem said it again, but Mira still couldn’t hear. They were approaching the top of the snow mound now. Mira gasped as she saw the glittering white hills and fields laid out beneath them. She could see for miles. The snowy mountains were behind them, and ahead were the snow-topped turrets of Unicorn School. It was beautiful!

  ‘What did you say, Raheem?’ she asked again.

  ‘I SAID I’M NEVER YELLING AGAIN!’ Raheem yelled.

  The far-off rumbling noise returned. This time, it kept going. Mira turned back to see a huge white cloud of snow tearing down one of the magical mountains that surrounded the forest. It was getting bigger and bigger.

  ‘AVALANCHE!!’ Mira shouted.

  Everyone screamed. Mira felt her stomach leap into her throat as Dave dipped downwards. He was running down the other side of the snow mound now. The Perfect Massive Tree sleigh began to gain speed.

  ‘THIS IS SO MUCH FUN!’ whooped Darcy from her position on the trunk.

  ‘If you think DYING is FUN!’ howled Raheem.

  The tree sleigh was moving faster and faster, sending up sprays of powdery whiteness. But behind them the giant cloud of snow was getting closer.

  ‘It’s closing in on us!’ shouted Freya.

  Mira looked around desperately. The rumbling was so loud now it was drowning everything else out. They needed to go faster. What could she do? She thought frantically about all the things in her rucksack. Was there anything she could use?

  Wait . . .

  ‘Raheem, give me your metre sticks!’ Mira called, twisting round.

  Raheem’s eyes snapped open in surprise. He carefully reached into his backpack, grabbed the measuring sticks and threw them to Mira.

  Before Mira could think about it too much, she squeezed as hard as she could with her knees and made a lunge for the sticks. Her fingers closed around them. With all her strength, she threw them down on the snow in front of Dave’s hooves. He did a little jump, so that his hooves landed on the long, thin sticks.

  Now Dave was skiing. He zoomed across the snow, with the tree sleigh speeding up behind him. They kept just ahead of the avalanche, but it was getting closer and closer . . . Unicorn School was right in front of them and Mira could see pupils and teachers gathered in the paddock, standing around tables with big urns on them . . .

  Too late! The avalanche crashed around them. Class Red shot into the air . . . and Mira braced herself, squeezing her eyes tight shut.

  But they didn’t hit the ground like she was expecting.

  Mira opened her eyes.

  They were above the avalanche, surfing the rolling snow like a wave.

  Mira saw the panicked faces in the paddock as Class Red and the Perfect Massive Tree surfed towards them. But the avalanche began dipping and slowing. The rumbling around them grew quieter and the wave grew smaller and smaller. Finally it dumped them gently in the paddock, next to the table of hot chocolate. Children and unicorns tumbled from the tree and into the snow.

  Mira climbed to her feet and brushed the snow out of her eyes. Dave was lying under one of the urns, mouth wide open as a stream of hot chocolate poured into his throat.

  The next morning the whole school was out in the paddock again, helping to transform it for the Snow Unicorn celebrations.

  The paddock was decorated with lanterns, with stalls of different Christmas treats around the edge. Signs pointed to the ice-skating rink (the frozen swimming pool), and the Perfect Massive Christmas Tree stood proudly in the middle. It might have lost a few needles on its journey across the snow, but it still looked pretty impressive. All the other classes crowded round to admire it and to ask about the story of the avalanche, so Class Red were pleased they’d risked certain death to bring it back (Miss Glitterhorn felt differently).

  Once they’d hung red and green tinsel all around the fence and put the Decorated Festive Carrots under the tree for the Snow Unicorn, Class Red were allowed to wander round the different stalls. Mira decided to practise for the play. She’d already made Dave go through their scenes quite a few (seventeen) times before breakfast, but once more couldn’t hurt!

  She looked around for her unicorn, and saw that he was still by the tree. Class Orange were hanging chocolate decorations on the branches, and each time they put one on Dave would pop up and eat it. Mira quickly led him away.

  ‘Right, Dave – let’s go through all the scenes again!’ she began.

  Dave gave her a sly look, and then fell sideways in the snow and started snoring.

  ‘Dave!’ Mira said into his ear.

  He opened one eye and then scrunched it shut again.

  Hmm, Mira thought.

  She made a little ball out of the powdery snow and threw it at the snoozing unicorn. But Dave opened his eyes at the last minute, caught it in his mouth and spat it back. Mira made another snowball and threw it at Dave, but Dave did the same thing. Then Dave made a big snowball and threw it at Mira. She squealed as some of the snow went inside her coat.

  ‘Okay,’ Mira spluttered. ‘We can have a quick snowball fight, but then we are rehearsing the pla— ARGGHHH!’

  Another snowball hit her on the top of the head. Mira forgot all thoughts of the play as she started making a huge snowball to take her revenge.

  As Mira and Dave ran around the tree, ducking and diving and throwing snowballs as quickly as they could, Mira was laughing so much she could hardly breathe. One of the snowballs hit Freya, who immediately made her own and threw it back. Soon all of Class Red joined in!

  By the time Ms Dazzleflank appeared in the paddock, Class Red were soaking wet, freezing cold and very happy. And it was time for their final rehearsal. Class Yellow had set up the scenery and the stage, so it was going to be exactly like the real performance. This was the last chance to practise! Mira hoped that all the extra run-throughs they’d done would be enough. She desperately wanted that Star of the Show medal . . .

  ‘How was the rehearsal, Class Red?’ said Miss Glitterhorn. The rehears
al was over and the rest of the school and the teachers were joining Class Red by the tree. It would soon be time for them to leave their wishes for the Snow Unicorn!

  ‘It was great!’ said Flo. ‘Ms Dazzleflank’s just gone off for a walk on her own to think about how good it was.’

  ‘It was a disaster,’ said Jake. ‘Flo still screams all her lines, you can’t hear Raheem at all, the “Pebble” spends all its time eating and I’ve only got two lines.’

  ‘Just make up some more lines – that’s what I did,’ said Darcy.

  ‘Well, you know what they say,’ said Miss Glitterhorn. ‘A bad last rehearsal means a brilliant performance!’

  ‘What if it just means we’re not very good?’ said Raheem, looking worried.

  Madame Shetland arrived by the tree to officially begin the wish-making. She asked for some volunteers to give out the wish sheets.

  Mira was worried about her performance too. ‘You have to stop eating on stage, Dave,’ she said. ‘Otherwise I’ll – I mean we’ll – never win the medal.’

  Dave blinked at her and burped, which in Dave language could mean anything.

  Mira looked over at the Perfect Massive Christmas Tree, where Class Blue were already putting down their wishes. The tree decorations sparkled and the fairy lights twinkled, making patterns on the glittery snow.

  ‘Here’s your wish sheet,’ said Mira’s sister Rani, appearing beside her with a piece of paper and an envelope. ‘Don’t waste it on something rubbish.’

  ‘Thanks!’ said Mira, grabbing the wish sheet from Rani.

  Next to Mira, Raheem was already writing his wish. She wondered if he was wishing to do a good job of his lines. Mira caught Raheem’s eye and gave him an encouraging smile. He’d tried so hard in the rehearsal to speak louder.