Lady

by Roosh Valizadeh

  Secondly, the likelihood of this happening is low if you resist the urge to select a “bad boy” who has shown signs of substance abuse, violent behavior, dishonesty, or philandering. If you feed your devil when selecting a man, he will provide you with a devilish outcome. While there are cases where a good man turns bad over the years, it’s more common for the warning signs to be present early in the relationship. We no longer live in an age where you are expected to marry a man chosen for you by your family, so you must take full responsibility for your choice in men. If you let notions of a Hollywood-style whirlwind romance guide your decisions, things will end in disaster.

  The third reason you should not worry about destitution is that divorce laws are so rigged in your favor that it’s more likely your ex-husband will be put in jail for not paying child or spousal support than you going homeless. These divorce laws need to change because they’re unfair to men and discourage them from getting married in the first place, which reduces your pool of potential husbands.

  If you select for the good man who wants to protect and provide, you will greatly minimize the risk of marrying a bad man, though of course there are no guarantees in marriage. Life has a way of surprising us, and sometimes we must take the good with the bad. The main point is not to let old wives’ tales of husbands going bad push you into choosing a career over a family. This was a far bigger problem in the past when there was no government welfare, no domestic violence laws, and a woman didn’t have complete freedom to choose whom she wanted to marry.

  Once you accept that pursuing a career takes you away from your goal of establishing and maintaining a family, the question arises whether it’s even worthwhile for any woman to go to university.

  University Education

  In the past, it wasn’t necessary for a wife to have more than a middle school or high school education, because her husband would have a useful skill and work until his back gave out. Now, according to feminist ideology, women who choose to be housewives are “slaves,” while women who choose a career are superheroes. To make men accept this change, they had to be relentlessly emasculated until they saw women as an equally masculine partner, but this has so greatly weakened men that women no longer trust them to be strong enough to lead, perpetuating a cycle where a woman may feel she has no choice but to pursue a career if she wants to be materially secure.

  Today, men and women compete for jobs and riches, putting family on the backburner. During this pursuit of “success,” they seek harmful pleasures by feeding their devils, who have no trouble tempting fatigued and confused souls. Casual sex becomes a habit, making you so narcissistic, entitled, and damaged that you can never properly bond with a potential spouse.

  Hookup culture, which often starts in high school, has trained men to believe that sex is no big deal and should happen no later than the third date, and in some cases no later than the third hour upon meeting a new female. With millions of empowered women giving up their vaginas on the flimsiest of impulses, most men (including the good ones) don’t want to wait for sex. This means that even if you go the traditional route of avoiding university and a career to focus on having a family, your odds of success will increase only marginally because most men will not value your traditional outlook. The man who wants a family will certainly value it, but even the bulk of my male readers, who are far more traditionally minded than average, are so distrustful of women and the existing system that they may pass on marriage and choose something that resembles co-habitation instead. So what’s a good woman to do?

  First, let’s describe what happens to a typical 18-year-old girl who goes to university today. She will spend four years racking up tens of thousands of dollars in debt for a degree that is likely to be in the humanities or social sciences. She will be immersed in an environment that promotes hooking up with men who are “hot,” “sexy,” or “popular.” She will spend hundreds of hours studying and reading books, but zero hours becoming a good wife from learning basic cooking or homemaking skills. No matter what she majors in, she will be indoctrinated in feminism and embrace the belief that men are the enemy, pushing family down her list of priorities. And she will consume copious amounts of junk food, alcohol, and maybe drugs.

  Some women have been able to resist the temptations of a university environment, but it’s safe to say that most emerge from the experience spiritually poorer, less in tune with their feminine nature, more committed to securing a career, more in debt thanks to student loans, and less likely to get married within five years. For every story you hear of college sweethearts getting married, you hear dozens more of a woman who dyed her hair green, got her first tattoo, experienced a threesome, and got pumped and dumped by multiple Chads. Unless a woman goes to college specifically with the aim of meeting a potential husband, the outcome will be negative.

  It’s important to consider how a student loan impacts your ability to land a husband. The law is complicated in this area. Usually, your husband isn’t legally obligated for the debts you sustained before marrying him, but your repayments will have an effect on his finances and the household budget. Most men will regard your debt as their own if you get married, and if you have a lot of debt, they will be more inclined to stay away.

  The situation is more dire if you have a large amount of student loan debt and a low-paying job, because it’s likely that you won’t ever be able to pay it off. The burden will almost certainly fall on your potential husband, who will take your debt into account when deciding whether or not you’re worth a long-term commitment. If you’re perfect in every other way, the debt may not affect his decision, but if you have few other black marks on your record, such as a history of promiscuous behavior, he may decide to walk away. Having student loan debt that is under control will show a man that it will not be a burden to him.

  Once you realize the damaging consequences of pursuing career, I recommend the drastic option of not going to university at all. In modern culture, this seems totally out of the question, because it’s assumed that a university education is essential for a useful career, but this career may come at the cost of never getting married. You end up cash-rich but family poor. We have to tread a middle path between these two extremes and view education not from the perspective of how much money it will enable you to earn in the future, but how it will help you to find a husband and be content within marriage.

  Which option will allow you to take care of your basic needs and find a good man without having to endure the degeneracy and ideological programming of the university environment, which urges you to see men as the enemy and your career as some sort of salvation? Depending on your age and circumstances, the best option is likely skipping university and working in simple jobs where you will come into contact with potential husbands who find your traditional values highly attractive. Or it may be to enroll in a community college with low tuition fees and dabbling in courses out of intellectual curiosity. Or it may be to attend a four-year university that is cheap, doesn’t burden you with debt, and where you study practical (science-based) subjects instead of those steeped in anti-family ideology.

  Let’s imagine that you skip university and become a low-paying assistant in a predominately male office. One of these men with a promising future falls in love with you and proposes marriage. You get married at the age of 22 and become pregnant a year later. It is assumed that once you have the baby, you will quit your job, which doesn’t bring in much income anyway. As your child grows up, you will have more time to focus on your hobbies. And then you get pregnant again.

  You and your husband decide that two children are enough. Eventually, both of them will be in elementary school. You’ll now have more free time because when the kids come home from school, they won’t need constant attention and care as was the case when they were younger. This is when it makes sense for you to pursue higher education if you still want to. While your children are at school, you are free to go to school part-time, assuming it doesn’t conflict with your
household duties. When they become young adults and go to university, you have the option of easing into a full-time career. Yes, your female co-workers will be ahead of you on the corporate ladder, and you will start at a lower pay grade, but you will have something they won’t: grown-up children.

  This is just one possible scenario that suggests it makes sense for a woman to educate herself after she has children instead of before. Life is long, and if you’re 45 and have an empty nest, you still have at least three decades in which to pursue other interests. This is more than enough time to start a career or a business, provided it doesn’t harm your family.

  If I have the opportunity to create a family, I would like to have at least four children. This will ensure that my wife will never become “bored” or idle, because many modern technological appliances make child-rearing less difficult than in the past. If she does get bored at some point, she will have the option of working while the children are occupied with their education, assuming we don’t home-school.

  If you would like a career at some point, you can have it, because there is no biological clock stopping you from working at 60 or later, but there definitely is a biological clock that prevents you from having children after 40. First take care of the clock that ticks faster. Men and women have different biological clocks, so I hope you see the absurdity of putting both on the same university and career timeline, which was originally developed for men, not women.

  Ideally, the culture should encourage only men to go to university so women can focus on starting a family at an age that is in line with their biological clock. I know most women will regard this as too radical. They will say it’s not fair for them to stay at home, thinking that it’s easy or fun for a husband to be the sole provider when it actually comes with huge amounts of responsibility. As a man, I’m ready to take on this responsibility, assuming my wife accepts her share of the bargain and provides my brood with a proper home. I would rather my family live in somewhat impoverished conditions with a dedicated wife than in wealth with a semi-absent wife who didn’t devote her time to the family.

  With much of the theory out of the way, I can now proceed with the more practical matter of how to find a man.

  Book II: Men

  Bad Boys

  Many women are attracted to bad boys who can never become suitable husbands. Once you understand why this is part of your nature, the problem won’t be difficult to solve.

  First, remember that there is a positive and a negative side to your nature. Your angel focuses on nurturing and love, while your devil focuses on limitless materialism and scoring high-status men. When your devil is in control, which is the case for most women, you mistake the character of a bad boy, jerk, or asshole with having “high status,” whereas he is low status in terms of being a good husband. You assume that a man who doesn’t care about you has high status simply because he doesn’t care about you.

  Women have no clear way to judge the status of men. They’re not a computer that can process the hundreds of different variables that make up a man’s essence and spit out a value that tells them whether or not they should proceed with a relationship. Instead, they look for shortcuts, and the two most common shortcuts are if other women like a man and if a man treats them badly.

  If other women like a man, you assume that these women have done the hard work of judging his value and that you can automatically like him without having to judge him yourself. If he doesn’t treat you well, you assume that you must be beneath him in some way, because if his value was lower than yours, he would treat you like a princess and do all sorts of favors for you. You see a famous musician or actor as high status not necessarily because he is talented, but because so many other women give him positive attention. You see the tattooed playboy as high status because he treats you like dirt. This is even more the case if other women like him and he treats you poorly, because you will incorrectly think he’s your one-in-a-billion soulmate.

  Needless to say, these shortcuts do not work in finding a husband. They will cause you to become attached to a player who is enjoying a buffet of sexual options, or a deadbeat who will not stick around as a provider and protector. In a society that feeds only your devil, you use these two shortcuts to pick men who will merely provide you with entertaining sex.

  It gets even worse: having a career (or collecting government welfare) provides you with an income that results in seeing a man’s ability to provide as low value while you are in the prime of your beauty. Instead, you place greater emphasis on his looks, height, banter, humor, and sexiness. When a provider tries to please you, you put him on the backburner, because such a man doesn’t feed your devil.

  In my game books for men, I teach them how to hijack the two shortcuts. The first way is through “social proof,” where I tell men how they can signal to a woman that they are on friendly terms with other attractive women. When I’m in a club, it’s to my advantage if women see another beautiful woman touching me and flirting with me, because they will think that she has deemed my value to be high. In my early game days, I would stage pictures of myself with hot women, knowing that other women would see them, which enabled me to get more notches.

  My second piece of advice for men is not to be nice. In other words, don’t act like a provider and protector, because most women are feeding their devil and want men who have status or provide excitement. The best way for men to do this is to treat a woman badly by being aloof and teasing them. A man who is nice will win a woman’s heart if she is Mormon, Amish, or otherwise highly religious, but if she is not, he will repel her. For a man to at least get sex in the modern era, he must provide women with the status, excitement, drama, and physical attraction they crave.

  Men who follow my advice will get laid, but sadly they may not get any closer to a relationship that leads to marriage, because they ultimately do not want to marry a woman who succumbs to social proof and bad boy behavior. Such a woman is more likely to jump ship for another man who displays even higher status. The fact that men have to put in so much work just for sex, with little chance of enjoying a meaningful relationship, is why so many of them are dropping out of the game entirely.

  Sex is an important need for men, and I try to give them advice that is powerful enough to work on at least a physical level, but the mating game has become a dismal proposition for males. It’s easy for a man to chase women when he’s at the peak of his horniness, but once that tapers off, his subconscious tells him there is nothing more he can gain from women than cheap sex. In other words, if you’re wondering why a potential date isn’t calling you back or putting in the work to seduce you, it’s because his rewards from doing so in his past were non-existent. You’ll have to combat this by signaling that he will indeed be rewarded if he pursues you.

  Men who are in the dating game today have the knowledge and tools to trick you easily. I know how to front-load all the cool things about me when I first meet a girl to trigger an explosion of status in her mind. I even know how to be just vague enough when I answer her questions to spike her curiosity further. Your ability to judge a man can be so deficient that it’s possible for one to play video games all day and not have any real-life experience but still make you think he’s a worthwhile hookup. It’s too much of a risk for you to choose your male partners on emotion or gut instinct alone.

  If you were born in Europe, America, Canada, or Australia, you were raised in an environment that trained you to forsake your angel and feed your devil. Just being able to read English enables me to confirm that treating you badly, or at least showing that I don’t care about you, will excite you enough to start giving me the attention I need to fornicate with you. I’ve done it too many times to count, and have taught tens of thousands of men around the world to do the same.

  Even though I’ve shared a few game tricks with you, you’ll still fall for them until you make a conscious effort to starve your devil and stop pursuing the reward of sex with an exciting, high-status man. What you
may think of as listening to your instincts is really your devil feeding you harmful instructions. Trusting your instincts when your angel is absent will result in pursuing men who do not commit to you, and this pattern will continue for decades until the type of man you prefer no longer finds you attractive.

  The first step to breaking this cycle and making better decisions is to overlay your malformed instincts with logic. With every man you meet, when the time comes to decide whether or not to take the interaction to a more intimate level, ask yourself the following: “Is this the type of man who will provide and protect?” If the answer is no, you should not go any further unless you don’t mind getting pumped and dumped.

  A man who is not ready to provide or protect is feeding his own devil, which means he pursues sex for pleasure, variety, novelty, ego gratification, and excitement, and once these benefits disappear, which they usually do in a matter of weeks, he will bail on you without feeling any guilt. As I’m sure you already know, you cannot turn a player into a husband by convincing or persuading him to starve his devil. He must make the personal decision to listen to his angel before he meets you. This means that what you see is what you get. Apart from some superficial aspects, such as a man’s hairstyle or clothing, you will not change the essence of who a man is. If he changes a significant aspect of who he is, it will be because he made a conscious decision to change and not because of your influence.

  Let’s say that you’re in a nightclub with your friends for a birthday party. Out of the corner of your eye, you notice a man talking to a beautiful woman who seems to be engaged in the conversation. He is stylish and one of the most attractive men in the room. He eventually walks up to you and introduces himself as Eric.