Roy Blakeley's Motor Caravan

by Percy Keese Fitzhugh

  I said to Pee-wee, "This is a young reviewing stand. Look straightahead, keep your mouth shut, and look kind of careless--youknow--carefree."

  _Good night_, you should have seen the look he put on!

  "Is that what you call care free?" I whispered to him. "You look like anadvertisement for tooth powder."

  "That's the scout smile," he whispered.

  Honest, you'd have laughed to see him; he was looking straight ahead andgrinning all over his face.

  "Look natural," I whispered to him. "Look as if there wasn't a convictin the van. Look as if you never saw a convict."

  "How can any fellow look as if he never saw a convict?" he whispered."Most everybody has never seen a convict."

  "Well, look like them, then," I told him. "Look the same as a personwould look if he wasn't helping a convict to escape."

  He put on another kind of a smile and then he whispered to me, "I betnow those people will say I'm not helping a convict to escape, hey?"

  "Sure," I told him; "you look as if you were on the track of an icecream soda. Keep still and the worst will soon be over."

  XXIII--FIXING IT

  As we went past the Post Office I felt pretty shaky, because there werea whole lot of people there and some of them were women, and there werea lot of children, too. The women said, "Isn't he cute?" They meantPee-wee.

  Everybody stared at us as we went by, and read the printing on the vanand said how the boy scouts were all right. It didn't seem as if anybodywas suspicious at all. Some of them waved to us and we waved back and Iheard a man say that we were lively youngsters. Gee whiz, nobody everaccused us of being dead, that's one sure thing.

  One lady said how she had seen Pee-wee in the store and how he had toldher all about good turns. She said it must be great to be a boy. Geewhiz, she said something that time.

  "Now you see," Pee-wee whispered; "it's good I was in that store. It'sgood I told them all about the scouts, because now they're notsuspicious. They think it's all right for kids to be doing this, becauseI told them scouts are resourceful."

  "Did you tell them how we have plenty of initials?" I asked him.

  "Do you know what safe conduct is?" he asked me.

  "I know that yours isn't always safe," I told him.

  "It means when a general promises not to interfere with anybody, even anenemy. He gives them safe conduct; that means that they can go ahead andnot worry about being pinched, see? These people gave us safe conductand they're not bothering us, because they know the scouts are allright. It's on account of the way I talked to them. I came along firstlike a kind of a--you know--a what-d'ye-call-it----"

  "I don't know _what_ to call it," I said.

  "A herald," he blurted out.

  "Well," I said, "you look more like the funny page in the Journal to me.Don't talk too loud, the danger isn't passed."

  By that time we had got about fifty yards past the Post Office and I wasfeeling kind of nervous, but just the same I knew the danger was over.

  Pee-wee said, "Do you mean to tell me that those people would let acouple of kids like us go by driving a big van, and never ask them anyquestions, if they didn't know that we were all right? I fixed it allright, while you and Brent were worrying your lives out in the van. Nowwe're safe."

  I said, "Oh, you're the little fixer, all right."

  Just then, _good night_, one of those men came running after us calling,"Hi thar, wait a minute, you youngsters!"

  Oh, boy, a cold shudder ran down my back. I said, "We're pinched. I knewit was too good to be true."

  I stopped the car and when the man caught up with us he said, all out ofbreath, "What's this here talk one of you youngsters were givin' us'baout good turns? Allus ready ter do a favor, as I understand?"

  Oh, bibbie, wasn't I relieved.

  "That's our middle name," Pee-wee said.

  "Wall then, haow abaout doin' one naow?" the man said.

  By that time there were about a dozen people standing around in the roadand I gave Pee-wee a nudge and said, "Watch your step; let me do thetalking."

  But he didn't pay any attention to me. Off he went with a lot of stuffout of the handbook and wound up by saying how scouts were supposed tohelp strangers. "Sure, we'll do anything you want," he said; "all youhave to do is to ask us."

  "Wall then," the man said, "here's a lot of folks wantin' to go to thereunion at the Crossroads and we was thinkin' as haow you might pack 'eminter this here van of yourn as long as the trains ain't runnin'."

  _Jumping jiminies!_ I nearly fell through the seat.

  XXIV--SNOOZER SETTLES IT

  That was a home-run all right I said, all flabbergasted. "You see, theonly trouble is I'm not an experienced driver and these are--they'repretty rough roads--and--eh--"

  "That's one thing about us," Pee-wee piped up; "we're not as smart as welook. Maybe it seems as if we could do most anything, but we can't.That's one thing about a scout, he has to admit it if he doesn't knoweverything. He has to--he has to--eh--he has to safeguard the lives ofothers. See? Suppose we ran into a ditch and upset the car and everybodygot killed. They wouldn't thank us, would they?"

  One of the ladies said, "Oh, isn't he just too funny for anything!"

  The man said, kind of slow and drawly like, he said, "Wall, yer coulddrive slow en' thar ain't no ditches."

  "Even one ditch would be enough," the kid said. "Isn't there just one?"

  Jiminetty, I could hardly keep a straight face. There were all thosepeople crowding around the van and saying how nice it would be if wewould take a group to the reunion and how we had plenty of room. Ithought of Brent sitting on the grocery box inside, and I bet he waslaughing.

  I said under my breath to Pee-wee, "All right, you got us into this withyour good turns; now you can get us out."

  Then a man said, "A couple of boys who are going to have an eye out torecapture a convict, like this here little feller says, they ought to besmart enough and kind enough, I reckon, to give some of these heredisappointed souls a lift. Jest you boys open these here doors and letthe youngsters pile in, so they can go see Uncle Tom's Cabin."

  "That--that show isn't going to be much good," Pee-wee said; "and I cantell you one thing, it's pretty stuffy in that van. That's one thingscouts believe in--fresh air."

  By that time he was fidgeting around on the seat and some of the peoplewere laughing and some of them looked surprised.

  "That's just it," Pee-wee said; "if you were boy scouts and you weregoing to try to capture a criminal, you wouldn't want a lot of childrenalong, would you? And ladies? Ladies are a-scared of criminals; gee, Idon't blame them."

  Somebody said, "Oh, I guess the hounds they got on the trail will findthe convict, all right, so you boys can jest consider if you're goin' tolive up to your words or not 'baout doin' good turns."

  Oh, boy, that was a terrible moment in Pee-wee's life. I guess _DanDauntless_ never had so much to worry about. But that kid has somesense, anyway, and that's more than that story fellow has. In a coupleof seconds I noticed that he was wiping his face with his handkerchiefand I saw that he was getting the key sort of rolled up in the cloth atthe same time. Then he made believe to put the handkerchief in his backpocket, but really he dropped it through the little window into the van.You couldn't even hear it drop inside.

  Then he said, "The trouble is that this van is locked and we haven't gotthe key." That kid would never have said that while he had the key,because it would have been a lie. And scouts don't lie, that's sure.

  Jiminy, I don't know what those people thought; anyway I felt prettymean. The ladies said anyway they were just as much obliged to us. Themen looked kind of as if they didn't have much use for us, but theydidn't say anything and I had to admit that Pee-wee had got away with itall right.

  Then, _good night, Sister Anne_, what should I see but our old collegechum Snoozer from the Uncle Tom's Cabin show. There he was, right amongall those people, pushing them out o
f the way and sniffing around as ifhe was half crazy. Pee-wee and I jumped down and pushed past the peoplewho were all crowding around the back of the van, and, _good night_,there was that pesky actor dog with his feet on the step, sniffing andsniffing at the doors and barking and yelping for all he was worth.

  "Chop down them doors!" I heard a man say. "That's somethin' wrong here.This here dog is an official bloodhound, and, _by gum_, he's trackedthat thar convict. That chap paid these youngsters to help him escape,that's what he has--by thunder! Somebody get an axe out of the PostOffice and chop down these here doors. Don't either one of youyoungsters try to run or, by thunder, you'll drop in your tracks. Goodturns, eh? So them's the kind of good turns you do, hey? Get an axesomebody--quick!"

  XXV--BIG EXCITEMENT AT BARROW'S HOMESTEAD

  I was kind of excited, but I said to Pee-wee, "Don't get scared; allthey'll do is arrest him; he'll get off."

  Then one of the men came up and said to us awful loud and gruff, "Naow,you kids, aout with that key, hand it over!"

  I said, "Didn't you hear my chum say that we haven't got the key? Itshows you don't know much about scouts if you think they lie. If youwant to know where the key is, it's inside."

  "Wall then, yer better crawl through that little winder up thar in frontand git it," he said.

  "I don't have to get it," I told him; "go and get it yourself if youwant it. You must have been reading dime novels if you think that boyslike us help convicts to escape. If you tear down those doors you'll putthem up again, I'll tell you that."

  Just then along came a man with a brass badge on about as big as asaucer. I said to Pee-wee, "Look what he's hiding." He had an axe, too.There were a lot of people crowding all about him. One of them said,"It's a pretty desperate attempt, Constabule." The man said, "I'll havehim behind the bars in about a jiffy. These boys is accessories, that'swhat they are."

  "Accessories are things that come with motor-boats," the kid whisperedto me.

  I said, "Well, we're the kind of accessories that come with motor vans.This is some circus; Brent will get his wish and go to jail, all right.There's no use getting scared."

  By that time everything was excitement. People came running out ofhouses and crowded around the van and stared at Pee-wee and me. Geewhiz, I don't know where all the people came from. All the while the dogkept clawing at the doors of the van and barking and yelping. I wonderedhow Brent felt inside the van. In about five minutes the whole town wasout, gaping and talking, all excited.

  The constable said to us, "Naow then, you youngsters, you beencompoundin' a felony, that's what you been doin'. Now who's inside thatvan? Who yer hidin'? Somebody, hey?"

  "I'm not denying anything," I told him. "All I say is we didn't breakany law."

  "Wall, yer admit yer concealin' somebody in thar, ain't yer--huh?" heshouted.

  I said, "I'm not denying it, but I'm not scared of you."

  He said, "Yaas? Wall, we'll soon see. We'll have him under lock and keyfor sartin, if that's what he likes."

  "That's his favorite pastime," I said; "you don't know him."

  "Surraound this here wagon, you people," the constable said, "and keep awatch on these kids; they're pretty slippery."

  So then the constable and another man began chopping down the doors."It's up to them," I said to Pee-wee; "we should worry."

  "What do you suppose Brent will do?" he said.

  "They'll lock him up till the whole thing is explained," I said; "theywon't take our word for anything. He's got troubles of his own at last;I hope he's satisfied. He wanted bread and water, now he'll get it."

  "They'll lock us up, too, won't they?" the kid said, good and scared."That man is keeping his eye on us."

  All the while the dog kept yelping and clawing at the doors and thepeople crowded closer around so as to see better. Gee, I felt kind ofsorry for Brent, because I saw he was up against it.

  All of a sudden down came one of the doors and the bloodhound spranginside and came out again. The constable poked his head in and said,"_Well, I'll be jiggered!_" Pee-wee and I looked inside and, good night,that van was as empty as an ice cream soda glass when Pee-wee is throughwith it.

  "Well--what--do--you--know--about--that?" I stammered under my breath toPee-wee.

  "His dream came true," Pee-wee whispered to me; "he kept his vow, hefoiled everybody, he _escaped_. He--he--he what-d'ye-call-it--he hasn'tlived in vain--hey?"

  "He hasn't lived in the van very long, that's sure," I whispered. "Hehas put it all over these people and us too. Can you beat that fellow?"

  "He defied locks and bolts and dungeons like Houdini," the kid said. Iguess he saw Houdini in the movies.

  "Sure, he's a real hero at last," I said; "but he's got _me_ guessing."

  The constable and a couple of other men were stamping around inside thevan and he called out, "Thar ain't no clew here, nothin' but this herecan opener." And then he came out with the can opener in his hand.

  Gee whiz, I just couldn't help shouting right out in front of everybody.I said, "That clew explains the whole mystery. There was a can of bakedbeans in that van, and he must have opened it and emptied them out andsecreted himself in the empty can. When we threw the can away, heescaped."

  The constable said, "What's all this talk? I want to know who you kidsis, anyway. And I want ter know what you're doin' here, runnin' this bigvan all by yourselves."

  I said, "I'm Sherlock Nobody Holmes, the boy detective. This is mytrusty pal, Scout Harris. We're on our way to kidnap Major Grumpy inthis van and hold him until he gives up one thousand dollars to the BoyScouts of America. Can you tell us where we can buy a couple of sparkplugs?"

  XXVI--TO THE RESCUE

  All of a sudden the plot grew thicker. I thought we'd have to thin itwith gasoline, it grew so thick. For a few minutes Pee-wee and I juststood there wondering what had become of Brent and laughing at theconstable who was holding his axe in one hand and our can opener in theother, and all the people stood around staring at us as if they didn'tknow what to make of us.

  The constable said, "I daon't like the looks uv this here, I don't. Youallowed there was somebody in that van. Now whar is he?"

  I said, "I didn't allow anything, I just didn't _deny_ anything. What'sthe use of blaming us because you half chopped the van to pieces? Allyou've got is a can opener--we should worry. You seem to trust the dog;if you want to ask any questions you'd better ask _him_. The only personhe knows how to track is Eliza, because that's his business."

  "He's on the stage," Pee-wee piped up.

  "You mean he's in the van," I said.

  The constable said, "Wall, I reckon you youngsters'd better tell yerstory ter Justice Cummins. It's mighty funny two young boys travelin' bytheirselves in a big van."

  "I'll recount our adventures to him," Pee-wee piped up. "Where is he?"

  For about half a minute the constable just stood there staring at us. Iguess he didn't know what he'd better do. All the rest of the peoplestood around, staring. I guess it was the biggest thing that everhappened in Barrow's Homestead. Inside the van a couple of men wereholding the bloodhound by the collar. Some excitement.

  All of a sudden, zip goes the fillum, along the road came an auto,pell-mell! It came through the village from the direction we were goingin.

  "Look!" Pee-wee said. "Look who's in it; it's Harry; who's that withhim?"

  Before I had a chance to say anything, the car was close up to us andHarry and another person were stepping out. Harry was laughing all overhis face, but he was in a terrible hurry, I could see that. I gave onelook at the person who was with him and began to roar.

  "It's--it's Brent--Gaylong," Pee-wee whispered.

  I said, "Don't make me laugh any harder or I'll die of shock."

  Honest, even now when I think of it I have to laugh. He looked likeCharlie Chaplin only more so. And he had such a funny way about himtoo--kind of dignified. He had on a great big straw hat like a farmerand a black
coat like a minister, only it was all in shreds. It was histrousers that made him look like Charlie Chaplin. Laugh! They were abouta hundred times too big and a mile too long, and every time he took astep he stumbled all over himself and had to hoist them up. His big hatwas pulled way down over his ears and--oh, I just can't tell you aboutit. He was a scream. And all the while he had a very dignified, severelook on his face, even when he tripped all over himself.

  Honest, I just howled. I didn't hear Pee-wee laugh; I guess he must havefainted. Harry came along behind Brent, trying not to laugh but everytime Brent's feet caught in his trousers I could see Harry's face alltwisted up just as if he was trying as hard as he could not to scream.Every step Brent took I thought he'd go kerflop on the ground. Thepeople were all giggling, but he didn't notice them at all, only kept onlooking very sober and stern--oh, boy, it was a scream.

  He said, "What is all this?" And then he fell all over himself and gavehis trousers a hitch. "Who is interfering with these boys in theperformance of their duty? Stand back, everybody!" And he wentstaggering against a tree and gave his trousers a good hitch up. "Who isthe leader of this motley throng?" That's what he said, and, gee whiz, Ithought he'd skid and land on his head. You couldn't see his hands, hissleeves were so long. "Who dares to stand--" he said, and, good night,he went kerflop on the ground and got right up again. I had a headachefrom laughing.

  Harry Donnelle just sat down on the step of the van and shook and shook.