The Homestead on the River

by Rosie MacKenzie

  On her first night back at Eureka Park, he had waited until Marcus and Freddie had gone to bed, his parents had retired to watch TV and Lillie was doing her homework, before he asked Clara to come for a walk with him. Together they’d strolled down to the river. They sat on the sand and Clara told him that when she went back to Ireland she realised she no longer loved Charles.

  ‘It’s you I love,’ she said, putting a hand to his face. ‘You I’ve always loved.’

  At that Ronan took her in his arms and kissed her passionately. They broke apart and marvelled at each other.

  ‘I spent that time in France coming to grips with what I’d done,’ Clara said, running a hand through his hair, ‘but in the end I knew it was the right thing.’

  Since that night they had spent every spare moment together. It was Ronan’s suggestion that she come up to Armidale, take over the spare room in his digs and work for the dentist he’d gone to.

  On Clara’s second night in Armidale they’d gone to the drive-in theatre to see The Graduate. Afterwards they drove up to the lookout and watched the twinkling lights below. Seeing a grassy patch under a wattle tree a little further away, Ronan got out of the car and carried the rug they had used to keep them warm during the movie and spread it on the ground. He took Clara’s hand and together they fell to the ground, kissing and fondling each other.

  ‘Undress me,’ Clara whispered, placing Ronan’s hand on the buttons of her dress. ‘Please, Ronan, undress me.’

  ‘Are you sure?’ he asked.

  She squeezed his hand. ‘I’ve never been so sure in my life.’

  Slowly Ronan undid the buttons. She wasn’t wearing a bra, so he could clearly see her beautiful breasts. Lowering his head, he kissed her warm skin and caressed her nipples between his lips. At the same time his hand moved up under the soft fabric and inside her silk panties where his fingers felt her moistness. As if he’d opened a door to a hidden treasure, Clara wriggled out of her dress and panties. Now she was naked. Above them the moon peeked out from behind the clouds and the stars were so bright it was as if an angel above had switched them on especially. With her glistening body lying beside him on the rug, Ronan had never seen anything as perfect. ‘You’re so beautiful,’ he whispered, his fingers exploring the satiny smoothness of her thigh.

  ‘And now it’s your turn,’ Clara whispered in his ear, and undid the buttons on his shirt and the zipper of his jeans.

  For some time they lay there naked together, playing pleasurably with each other. To Ronan it was as if he’d known Clara’s body intimately all his life. Following the curve of her breasts with his hand, he caressed her flat belly.

  ‘I worship you, Clara,’ he whispered, moving his hand between her legs, causing her to gasp for breath.

  ‘I love you, Ronan,’ she whispered. ‘More than you’ll ever know.’

  Later, after he’d entered her and she had called out in ecstasy, arching her back and begging him to never stop, they lay in each other’s arms.

  ‘Oh, Ronan,’ she said. ‘What if I’d never known love like this?’

  It was early morning before they folded up the blanket and returned to Ronan’s digs, where they made love again in Ronan’s bed. After that Clara slept with him every night; each time he was careful to use a condom.

  * * *

  James and Kathleen decided to throw a party at Eureka Park for Ronan’s twenty-first birthday.

  ‘We won’t need plates or knives or forks. We can eat the snags and steaks wrapped in bread with tomato sauce,’ Ronan had said to Kathleen, trying to persuade her not to go overboard with preparations.

  ‘We will need plates,’ she said firmly. ‘And knives and forks. It’ll be done properly or not at all.’ She smiled the smile Ronan loved so much. ‘It’s not every day our eldest son turns twenty-one.’

  The day of the party, Ronan and Clara drove down from Armidale. In addition to Ronan’s friends, his parents had invited the Hogans and a few of their neighbours in for the afternoon as well. Lorna and Brian Medlow were also coming and were spending the night in Gullumbindy at the Telegraph. Even Father Fogarty had accepted an invitation.

  Lillie told Ronan she’d invited Deb; however, she was loath to leave the family property, as a pack of rogue dogs had got in and attacked a heap of their prized merinos. Her father had to shoot the injured sheep.

  Now, as Ronan watched Clara coming down the bank to where he was preparing a fire to cook on by the river, he felt his heartbeat speed up. She looked so beautiful, wearing a pair of blue jeans and a white shirt. Somehow that simple outfit looked more glamorous than if she was dressed in the fanciest of ball gowns.

  All in all, there were about thirty guests. Dingo, egged on by the family yelling at the top of their voices, ‘Go, Dingo, go!’, won the dog race Ronan had organised, with Bill Hogan’s Ned coming second. A few of Ronan’s friends had brought kayaks on roof racks, so there was a kayak race on the river as well. Even Arthur had a go and came second to one of Ronan’s mates. When they were all sitting around by the river, James stood up and made a toast to his son. Although feeling embarrassed in front of everyone, inwardly Ronan was very moved by his father’s speech.

  Many of the revellers had pitched tents along the river and that night, after Ronan’s parents and the older guests had gone, the younger ones gathered around the campfire. Ronan played the guitar and Clara led the singing. As he gazed across at Clara, Ronan had a huge urge to make love to her. As if sensing his thoughts, Clara held his eyes and he knew she was thinking the same thing. Although he hadn’t pitched his own tent down here, Ronan decided then and there that as it was such a lovely night, he and Clara would sleep by the river. He’d go back up to the house and get a couple of blankets.

  When Lillie and his brothers had gone up to bed and the rest of the revellers were in their tents, he and Clara placed the blankets down on the grass. They made long, lingering love, then lay under the stars, listening to the chirp of crickets and the gentle lap of the water running over the stones in the river below.

  Ronan leant over and fondled Clara’s breasts, cupping them in his hand and taking her nipples within his fingers.

  ‘Will you marry me, Clara?’ he asked.

  Clara pulled back a little and looked at him.

  ‘Perhaps not straightaway,’ he added. ‘I’ll need to finish uni first and get a real job. I haven’t had a chance to tell you, but Dalgety’s rang this morning and said they’ll take me on in their farm management division when I finish up at the end of the year.’

  It was that phone call that had prompted Ronan’s proposal. He’d thought long and hard about what he wanted to do and the experience he’d get at Dalgety’s should set him up for life if he ever got a chance to own his own place. He belonged on the land. Here in Australia. Or back in Ireland.

  ‘So I’ll be able to support you,’ he said. ‘We’ll just have a small wedding with Father Fogarty presiding.’ He chuckled, rolling her on top of him. ‘With the church at Gullumbindy full of flowers and you walking down the aisle with orange blossom in your hair.’

  Clara laughed. ‘And where would you get orange blossom in Gullumbindy?’

  ‘True. Maybe blossom from a jacaranda tree.’ He touched her hair. ‘The purple will suit you beautifully. And afterwards we could have a celebration at the Telegraph Hotel. The Hogans would love that. And we could get our own piece of land with lots of animals. Young Fred would be tickled pink. And,’ his eyes twinkled, ‘we’ll have a whole rugby team of kids.’

  ‘Honestly, Ronan, you’re crazy. A rugby team, no. But yes,’ she said, her eyes gleaming with happiness, ‘yes, of course I’ll marry you. Nothing would give me more happiness. And our wedding should be just like you said. I think that would be perfect.’ She paused and Ronan could see mixed emotions in her eyes. ‘On the other hand, you don’t suppose it’s a bit soon after I broke off with Charles to announce anything? What would people think?’

  ‘Who gives a damn what people thin
k? We love each other. That’s what matters.’

  Clara leant forward and kissed his forehead. ‘Still … maybe we should leave it for a little while before we tell anyone. Especially Mummy. She’ll be furious with me.’

  ‘I thought she liked the O’Sullivans?’

  ‘Of course she does. Even so … well … You know what I mean.’

  Ronan touched her lips with his fingers. ‘I think I can keep it a secret. Mind you … only for so long.’

  ‘Oh, Ronan. I do love you. So very much.’ She paused. ‘But if I marry you I’ll have to pay Charles back the money he spent on my fare. Otherwise I’d feel dreadful.’

  Ronan smiled. ‘I think that is a must.’

  Now they made love again, even more passionately than before. As long as he lived, Ronan knew he’d always remember the moment Clara had agreed to marry him.

  CHAPTER

  37

  With Arthur’s help, during the summer school holidays Lillie had trained Muffin to showjump, practising in the bottom paddock where she and Arthur had set up some jumps. On the morning of the Quirindi Show, Arthur drove her and Muffin across in the horse float.

  It turned out Brad Hickey was competing on his large bay horse in the same showjumping event she was in. After a clear round he cantered past Lillie and Muffin, who stood waiting their turn. Raising his hat, he did a mock bow as he recognised her. As usual when Lillie saw him, her heart missed a beat. The next competitor knocked four poles down. After that it was an older man, who had one refusal and then knocked two poles flying. Now it was Lillie’s turn.

  She leant down and patted Muffin on the neck. ‘Go, girl,’ she coaxed. ‘Let’s kick the butt off the rest of these horses.’

  Muffin cleared the first ten jumps beautifully and when they got to the triple-bar, the last jump, Lillie could see a jump-off coming up. Just as she thought: Yes! We did it! Muffin nicked the last pole. ‘Oh no,’ Lillie wailed as she looked back and saw it hit the ground. Nevertheless, she patted Muffin gently on the neck to tell her she’d done a great job.

  Half an hour later, when the other competitors had finished their rounds, Lillie realised they’d got third place to Brad Hickey’s first. As they stood in line for the presentation of the rosettes, he leant over and held out his hand.

  ‘You two did really well,’ he said in his deep voice. ‘You were unlucky with the last jump.’

  ‘Thanks,’ Lillie said, taking his firm hand in her sweaty palm. Much to her horror, she felt the colour rising in her cheeks and she had to look away and pretend to fiddle with her stirrup.

  Later he came up to her when she was eating a hot dog and watching the flag race.

  ‘How’s Deb?’ he asked.

  ‘She’s great,’ Lillie said, wiping the tomato sauce from her lips.

  ‘Can I call you some time?’ he asked.

  Lillie looked at him, not quite believing what she was hearing. ‘What about your girlfriend?’

  ‘We’ve broken up.’

  Lillie grinned. ‘Well … In that case, yeah, why not?’

  Driving home with Arthur that evening, she wondered, much as she fancied him, if she shouldn’t have played harder to get. But if she’d refused he’d probably have gone and asked someone else.

  A few days later he rang. ‘G’day, Lillie,’ he drawled down the phone. ‘How’re you doing?’

  ‘Good thanks. What about you?’

  ‘All the better after hearing your voice.’

  Lillie was glad he couldn’t see her blushing.

  ‘Do you want to go and see the Seekers?’ he asked. ‘They’re on in Tamworth next week. There’s a Sunday afternoon show. Maybe you could catch an early bus back to school?’

  Lillie waited a moment before answering, trying not to sound too enthusiastic.

  ‘Yeah. Why not?’ she said. ‘I’ve heard them on the radio … They’re really good. I’ll see what I can organise. My brother has a few days off uni but I know he’s got to be back in Armidale for rugby practice at three-thirty on Sunday, so he might drop me off on the way through.’

  ‘That’d be great. What’s say I meet you at Fitzroy’s at one? We can walk along.’

  When she put the phone down she hurried to her bedroom and tried to work out what to wear. Finally she settled on a pair of three-quarter length blue jeans and a red and white striped top, which would go with her red loafers. She then rushed out excitedly to tell Ma and ask if she could go.

  ‘Yes. If Ronan drops you off. But don’t go building it up too much,’ Kathleen warned. ‘Then it might be a disappointment.’

  ‘He’s really nice,’ Lillie said. ‘All the girls like him.’

  ‘Yes, I saw him at the dance, remember? Be careful, that’s all I’m saying.’

  After getting such a lukewarm reaction from Ma, she hurried off to ring Deb, who was much more enthusiastic.

  ‘Oooh!’ she exclaimed. ‘I knew he’d get rid of that girlfriend. Lucky you.’

  On the drive up with Ronan on Sunday her stomach was churning terribly from nervousness and excitement.

  ‘You sound like a washing machine,’ he chuckled. He looked at her intently. ‘You sure this bloke’s okay? I’ve heard he’s got a bit of a reputation.’

  ‘He’s perfectly okay, thank you very much.’ As she got out of the car, she leant over and gave him a kiss on the cheek. ‘I’ll be fine. Truly I will. And give my love to Clara. Sorry she couldn’t get down.’

  He smiled. ‘She was pissed off she had to work. Once a month the dentist does a Saturday morning.’

  It turned out to be a fun, starry couple of hours. The crowd tapped their feet to the music and Brad held her hand. Lillie’s heart thrilled. They even met Judith Durham outside the venue when the show finished. After they had a milkshake back at Fitzroy’s, Brad dropped her a little way from school so that no one would see. Before she got out of the car, he gave her a long, lingering kiss, which made her body tingle all over.

  ‘Can I ring you during the week?’

  ‘We’re not allowed to take phone calls unless it’s family. But what about Friday night when I’m home?’

  ‘Sure, I’ll ring then. Maybe I could come down on Saturday and we could go for a ride?’

  ‘You could ride Sadie, the mare Dad rides now. She’s never got in foal but he keeps her because she’s fun to ride.’

  ‘Sounds great.’

  For days afterwards she walked around in a cloud of euphoria. Deb asked if she was on some sort of medication.

  ‘Or are you just in love?’

  ‘Well … I’m not taking any medication…’

  ‘Lucky you,’ Deb said. ‘You’ll be the envy of every girl in the district.’

  Lillie thought Deb was probably right. She couldn’t wait until next Friday night when Brad would ring her and they’d arrange for him to come down on Saturday.

  * * *

  He rang at seven on Friday as promised and said he would drive down in his ute in the morning. Lillie told him she would pack a picnic and they would ride to her favourite spot further along the river.

  ‘When you go out riding with Brad, make sure you take Arthur with you,’ her mother said before she, Dad and her brothers left the next morning to join Clara and watch Ronan play rugby in Tam-worth, where his uni team were playing against the local Tamworth team.

  ‘Ma! I’m nearly eighteen. I think I can look after myself.’

  ‘I hope so,’ Kathleen said. ‘In any case, we’ll be back late afternoon.’

  After they left she made some sandwiches and filled a thermos, all the time shaking with nervousness. What if he didn’t like her when he saw her again? But when he drove up at twelve and she went out to greet him, he pulled her to him and kissed her deeply.

  ‘You look great,’ he said, winking. ‘I love those tight jeans.’ He patted her on the bottom. ‘They show off your bum to perfection.’

  Lillie blushed. She’d agonised as to what to wear. These jeans were tight, but she really liked them.


  Brad looked around and down to the river. ‘Finn Malone did a good job to find this place. Such a pity the bloke did himself in.’

  ‘So you think he did commit suicide now? You weren’t so sure before.’

  ‘Reckon he did. There doesn’t seem much else to go on.’

  ‘No, there doesn’t. When were you last out here exercising the horses for him?’

  ‘About a month before he was found. But God knows when the bloke actually did the deed.’

  ‘And he seemed okay then?’

  ‘Yeah. He told me about you lot coming. Seemed to be looking forward to it.’

  ‘And he wasn’t drinking?’

  ‘He seemed sober enough.’

  Her parents had told Lillie how Uncle Finn had gone to Brisbane to dry out. Brad must have seen him after he came back. But then he must have started drinking again when he killed himself. It was all so sad.

  ‘Anyway,’ she said to Brad, ‘I’ve saddled Sadie. And I’ve got lunch packed. So if you’re right we can head off.’

  ‘Sure am.’

  An hour or so later they lay on a rug beside the river. They’d finished their sandwiches and half the bottle of wine Brad had brought and insisted Lillie help him drink. Brad rolled over and kissed her hard on the mouth, all the time fondling her breasts. The combination of the wine and the hot sun made Lillie quite tipsy. As if in a blur she felt Brad remove her top and undo her bra, releasing her breasts. Taking off his own shirt, he ran his hand across her waist and undid her jeans. Through her fuddled, aroused brain, Lillie realised she was about to lose her virginity. Despite fantasising about such a moment, this frightened the life out of her.

  ‘Brad … No …’

  ‘Trust me, it’ll be okay,’ he whispered, pulling on what Lillie supposed was a condom. ‘I promise.’