#Goals

by Teodora Kostova

  “You’re not tired?” Avery asked, reaching for his phone in his pocket.

  “A little.” Victor's eyes were closed as he spoke, a soft smile playing on his lips. “I could use a drink.”

  “I’ll text Aziz.”

  A few minutes later Aziz arrived with food and drinks. After they ate, Avery changed into swimming shorts and decided to relax in the pool. The water felt good on his tired body, and the undisturbed nature views relaxed his eyes. Propping himself on the edge of the pool, Avery lay his head on his arms and let his mind drift into any direction without aim.

  Images of him and Victor at the market today flowed lazily, his lips curving at the memory. Victor had been enthusiastic to try local food, and talk to the shop keepers, and had bought too many knick-knacks. It was weird how relaxed Avery felt in Victor's presence. As if nothing could hurt him, nothing could stress him out. As if everything in the world was fine.

  Music sounded from the villa, claiming Avery's attention. He turned and saw Victor walking towards him, wearing – god help him – a black speedo. He carried their glasses in both hands and left them on the edge of the pool as he sat, legs dangling in the water playfully. Avery swam closer and reached for his cocktail.

  “I love this song,” he said after he took a long, languid sip.

  “Yeah?” Victor raised an eyebrow. “I’ve never seen you post about ‘New Dawn’.”

  Avery shrugged. “I don’t post about every little thing I like.”

  Victor's brow lifted higher.

  Avery laughed. “Okay, fine, maybe I do, but some things are not as popular so I don’t waste energy on them when most people would ignore it.”

  Victor nodded wordlessly, taking a sip of his own cocktail, then jumping in the pool.

  “We should really get the flamingo,” Avery said when Victor resurfaced. “I’d kill to lay on it right now and stare at the stars.”

  Victor swam closer. “Come.”

  Avery went.

  Unexpectedly, Victor kicked his feet from under him and supported Avery's floating body with his hands under his back.

  “Relax. You don’t have to tread the water. I’ve got you.”

  Avery shivered in the warm water. He willed his body to relax. Trusting someone to keep him afloat had never been something he was comfortable with, but with Victor? With Victor he knew he’d be safe.

  Victor steered his body slowly around the pool. Avery admired the twinkling stars – so many in the dark sky. The moon was nowhere to be seen.

  He let his mind empty of all thought. His eyes grew droopy. He closed them.

  Chapter nine

  Victor couldn’t believe Avery had fallen asleep in his arms. In the pool.

  All this time he’d thought Avery didn’t trust anyone, couldn’t trust anyone, and now he’d felt relaxed enough to drift to sleep with only Victor's hands keeping him above water.

  Victor couldn’t look away from his face. His skin was wet, lashes clumped together, lips slightly open.

  Victor couldn’t resist gathering Avery's body in his arms and carrying him to the edge of the pool. His skin was warm as his cheek pressed against Victor's chest.

  Avery moved ever so slightly and looking down Victor saw his eyes were open. Fingers traced Victor's chest, his collarbone, his neck.

  Avery met his eyes and Victor forgot how to breathe.

  There was so much desire in them, but it was laced with vulnerability that tugged at Victor's heartstrings.

  Without giving himself time to change his mind, Victor leaned down and brushed his lips over Avery's. A shiver ran through Avery. His eyes darkened when Victor pulled away and, faster than he could react, Avery freed himself from Victor's hold, grabbed him behind the neck, and pulled him down. Their mouths clashed with urgency Victor hadn’t expected.

  Victor pushed Avery against the wall of the pool, caging him in with his arms. Avery's hands were all over Victor, insistent and strong, greedily touching every bit of skin they could reach.

  “Wait…” Victor managed to say against Avery's mouth. “Avery…”

  Panting, Avery stopped. He buried his face in the crook of Victor's neck, his breathing ragged.

  “What are we doing?” Victor whispered, pulling away slightly to look at Avery's face.

  “We were kissing, before you stopped.” Avery's skin was flushed but whether it was from the kiss or from embarrassment Victor couldn’t tell. “If you don’t want to…” Avery licked his lips and looked away. “I’ll go back inside.”

  Victor didn’t move. “I want to,” he said.

  “Then why did you stop?”

  Why did I stop?

  He took too long to formulate his answer. Avery weaved his arms around his neck, and moved his body flush against Victor's.

  “We’re here, in this magical place,” Avery murmured, his lips brushing Victor's with every move. “We can have a bit of fun, right?” He rolled his hips suggestively. Victor closed his eyes as he felt Avery's hard length sliding against his own through their swim trunks.

  A bit of fun.

  Victor rolled the phrase around in his mind.

  Then Avery kissed him again and Victor forgot how to think.

  Chapter ten

  Avery had never been carried before. Victor held him in his arms as if he weighed nothing and brought him to the bed, all the while his lips never leaving Avery's.

  On the bed, Victor crawled on top of Avery, covering his body with kisses. Avery's chest felt tight. He hadn’t been with anyone in such a long time; he’d missed being touched.

  Victor's hands were gentle yet firm on his body, making him squirm under his touch. He wanted, no – needed – more. He couldn’t wait, not now.

  “Victor…” Avery managed, his voice raw. “I want you. Now.”

  He whimpered when Victor bit the junction of his neck and shoulder, arching into him. His cock was so hard it was going to burst without anyone touching it.

  “Victor!” Avery said with more urgency.

  Victor moved down his body, his stubble scraping Avery's skin. The sensation drove him wild. He buried his hands in Victor's hair, writhing on the bed, desperate to feel Victor inside him.

  Victor kept sliding down his body until he settled between his legs, Avery's fingers still in his hair. He kissed Avery's thigh, then pulled his swim trunks off. Avery groaned when his cock sprang free of its restraints. Gathering enough sense to prop himself on his elbows, Avery watched as Victor teased his balls with his tongue, their eyes meeting. He then licked up Avery's hard length, teasing the head with a swirl of his tongue, his eyes never leaving Avery's.

  Avery's cock twitched. Victor smirked before sucking onto the head. Avery's eyes rolled back, his head dropping back between his shoulder blades.

  Victor sucked him harder, deeper, massaging his balls with his hand. Avery saw stars behind his closed lids. He was so close to coming he was floating on a cloud of pure pleasure.

  His mouth moved and he was aware he was making obscene sounds – sounds he’d never before made in bed with anyone else – but he didn’t care. All he cared about was Victor's talented mouth and the way it made his body tremble with need.

  “Victor… Oh god… Fuck…”

  Avery's arms gave in and he collapsed on the bed. Victor hummed around his cock, the vibration sending pulses of pleasure through Avery's whole body. He wasn’t going to last much longer. He needed to come more than he needed air.

  “I’m close…” He said, the words more of an exhale than sound.

  Victor's mouth disappeared from Avery's cock and he whined in protest.

  “Wha…” He began, the words dying on his lips.

  He felt Victor's tongue flatten against his hole and he lost his damn mind. Hand gently jerking his shaft, Victor licked, sucked and teased his hole. Avery arched his back, seeking more contact.

  He needed… God, he needed… something. Anything. He wanted to stop this torture and yet he never wanted it to end.

/>   “Victor… I need…”

  He reached for his cock, wrapping his own hand over Victor's, trying to get more friction, more contact, something more…

  “Uh-uh,” Victor hummed, gently removing Avery's hand, his mouth still playing with his ass.

  “God dammit!”

  Avery bunched the sheets in his fists, bucking into Victor's mouth. Victor steadied him with firm hands on his spread thighs, and finally, oh god fucking finally, Avery felt the slick wet heat of Victor's mouth around his cock again.

  Avery swore, then moaned, then fucking lost his mind when Victor sucked him harder, his cock going deeper, hitting the back of Victor's throat.

  With a trembling hand in Victor's hair, Avery tried to push him away, to warn him, but Victor didn’t budge. Avery's orgasm spread through him like a burning fuse, building and building until it exploded with such force Avery thought his whole body was on fire.

  The come down from the most intense orgasm of his life was surreal. Avery's heart was beating wildly, his throat was dry when he tried to swallow, and his body was too sensitive even to the lightest touch. He felt Victor climbing up the bed, lying next to him and gathering him in his arms. Avery couldn’t do more than hum in acquiescence, snuggling closer.

  His brain had short-circuited just now, but it was slowly coming into awareness. Victor was holding him, just holding him, murmuring sweet words in his ear.

  Avery licked his dry lips. “You didn’t…”

  Victor shushed him before he could finish. “Let’s just sleep.”

  “But…”

  “It’s alright, Avery,” Victor said, his arms tightening around him.

  “Okay,” Avery managed before his heavy lids closed and his voice became too thick to speak.

  Chapter eleven

  When Victor woke up, Avery was not in bed. Sliding a palm over the sheets he discovered they were cold. He had no idea what the time was, but the sun was high in the sky, light flooding in the bedroom.

  He got up and took a quick shower before heading outside to look for Avery. He was sitting at the table outside, his laptop open in front of him. Victor saw the moment Avery sensed him coming – his body stiffened and his eyes hardened behind his glasses. Victor wanted nothing more than to go to him and kiss him, but Avery's body language screamed he wouldn’t be comfortable with that.

  Last night had been incredible. It had been intimate. But that was easy under the darkness of the night, and the romance of the twinkling stars, the warm water in the pool, the soft breeze in the curtains.

  Morning light was harsh. It showed every imperfection. Every regret. Every unwelcome thought.

  “Morning,” Victor said as he approached the table and pulled a chair across from Avery. He tried to keep his body relaxed, but Avery had put a wall between them. Victor wanted to take a hammer to it.

  “Morning,” Avery mumbled, his cheeks flaming. He kept his eyes on the screen.

  Victor helped himself to some of the leftover breakfast – a croissant, some fruit, and coffee – giving Avery a chance to relax in his presence.

  Soon, the clicking on the keyboard stopped and Avery closed the laptop. Removing his glasses, he stood and stretched.

  “When did you wake up?”

  “I don’t know, a couple of hours ago? I had to do some work and email Monique before we went out.”

  Avery still hadn’t met Victor's eyes. He bent forward, his fingers touching his toes, then back up again.

  “What are we doing today?”

  Avery reached for a thick brochure lying on the table next to his laptop. “Aziz brought this in with breakfast.”

  He passed it to Victor. A quick look was enough to see it was a brochure for various activities offered at the resort, and at nearby tourist attractions. Victor thumbed through it, a few things catching his interest, but he didn’t feel like choosing anything right now. In all honesty, all he wanted was to hang out here all day, with Avery, swimming in the pool, eating delicious food, taking a nap at the cabana…

  “I was thinking we could go to that temple,” Avery said, pointing at the picture on the front cover when Victor set it back on the table. “And then maybe take a walk around Ubud? Apparently, there are many good restaurants there, and a variety of art galleries.”

  “Sounds good.” Victor's fingers itched to hold a camera again, to shoot something he’d never seen before.

  “You sure? We can do something else if you prefer, or we can split and do our own thing if you don’t feel like spending the whole day together.”

  When Victor glanced at Avery his eyes were fixed on the brochure, his fingers touching the front cover nervously.

  Victor couldn’t take it anymore. He wanted nothing more than to be close to Avery, and the way Avery was acting was breaking his heart.

  He stood and slowly walked over to Avery, giving him a chance to stop him if he wanted to.

  He didn’t. When Victor was standing right in front of Avery, their chests nearly touching, and Avery still wouldn’t look at him, Victor placed a finger under his jaw and lifted his head. Their eyes met.

  “I want nothing more than to spend the day with you, Avery,” Victor said.

  An uncertain smile lifted the corners of Avery's mouth.

  “Yeah?”

  “Yeah.”

  The smile grew bigger and the brilliant specks of gold in Avery's eyes seemed to shine brighter.

  “Let’s try this again,” Victor said, drawing Avery into his arms. “Morning.” He bent and placed a soft kiss on his smiling lips.

  “Morning,” Avery replied, blush creeping up his cheekbones again.

  “Last night was amazing.” Another soft kiss on the corner of his mouth. “You are amazing.” A kiss on his nose. “And I’m very much looking forward to all the days – and nights – I’ll spend here with you.”

  Avery reached up on his toes and cupped Victor's face. “Me, too.”

  “By the way,” Victor began, remembering what he’d found earlier. “Have you seen what’s in the green box? With the ribbon?”

  “No…” Avery said slowly. “The one that was with the champagne and chocolates?”

  “Mhm.” Victor leaned in and kissed Avery again before pulling away with a cheeky smirk. “Toys. Five kinds of lube. And lots of condoms.”

  Avery grinned. “Well, then. We can’t let such a generous gift go to waste, right?”

  “Absolutely not.”

  Victor hooked an arm under Avery's legs, lifted him off his feet, and took him back to the bedroom.

  Chapter twelve

  For the first time since they’d arrived, Avery saw Victor reach for his camera. He’d mainly taken pictures with his phone so far, deemed them good enough for Instagram. He’d diligently done his three posts a day, and even a few stories, even though Avery could see his heart wasn’t in it.

  Taking his camera on their day trip had turned out to be a good idea. The beauty of the nature and the architecture they saw that day deserved to be captured as vividly as possible.

  They’d decided to go to Ubud first and leave the temple for later that day, if they had the time. There was so much to do and see in Ubud that by early evening Avery was certain they’d not only have to leave the Ulun Danu temple for another day, but they’d have to come back to Ubud at least one more time.

  Natural beauty and centuries old history surrounded them everywhere they turned. The town was literally built around massive rice fields and reminded Avery of Venice, with all its canals and bridges. They visited several art museums, marvelling at the talent displayed, and buying quirky souvenirs in the gift shops. In one art gallery, Avery had fallen in love with an abstract painting made entirely of different shades of blue and green, and couldn’t resist buying it. The shop owner had been very helpful with arranging delivery to Avery's home address.

  Victor must have taken hundreds of photos through the day. Now that Avery knew Victor better, he noticed the subtle changes in him once he had a ca
mera in his hands – his eyes became unfocused as if he was lost in his own world, and yet he never missed any details of what was going on around them; he pursed his full lips as he looked through the photos as if he wasn’t happy with what he was seeing; his long fingers held the camera gently, yet firmly, operating it with a confidence Avery found very sexy.

  Avery took his own photos and short videos, but he didn’t go online to post anything. He wanted to enjoy the day, and his time with Victor, without having to think about photo filters and chose the best angles and keep track of comments, likes and tags. For the first time in years, the experience was actually more important to Avery than what people thought about it.

  They got to Ubud Royal Palace shortly before closing time and just in time to see the traditional Balinese dancers. Set in the gardens, the stage was lit by torches all around it, casting ominous shadows on the stone statues guarding the gate behind it. The music, the dance, the whole performance – it was nothing like Avery had ever seen. Victor was busy taking photos, but Avery didn’t even take his phone out. He’d ask Victor for a photo he could use later. This was something to be enjoyed in real time, not through a lens.

  “Incredible, isn’t it?” Victor leaned down to whisper in his ear. He swung an arm around Avery's shoulders, bringing him closer. His camera was tucked safely away in its bag. Avery had been so enthralled by the performance he hadn’t even noticed Victor putting it away.

  “Yeah.” He leaned into Victor, enjoying the warmth of his body, and kept watching the dancers.

  They had dinner at a cosy seafood restaurant in the centre of town. Victor sat close to Avery in their private booth, a part of his body constantly touching Avery.

  Usually, Avery would feel crowded, suffocated, by such constant close proximity, but for whatever reason he didn’t mind with Victor. His presence calmed his mind and made his heart beat faster at the same time.

  Victor was more adventurous in his food choices, ordering fish Avery had never heard of. Avery decided to stick to tuna steak and calamari. Seafood was not something he wanted to experiment with.