Selling Your Story in 60 Seconds

by Michael Hauge

  Writers should never discount the importance of a title in a pitch either. A good title can be half the battle. The often-mocked title Snakes on a Plane told the whole story and got the writers their payday.

  It was the concept. It’s almost always about the concept. Short pitches benefit from a concise concept — one that creates lots of conflict. What’s most important is that I get a sense that what I’m hearing can sustain a 120-page script. After all, I have to invest two hours to read it.

  I have heard good pitches that are character driven and don’t offer much of a concept — but the protagonist is unique and compelling and seems like he could carry

  the weight of the story. Pitches that work intrigue me, move me and make me want to see the movie.

  Bill Lundy

  Screenwriter, Script Consultant

  Not saying what the genre is up front, not giving the title of the script, not saying who (or what) the protagonist and antagonist are, focusing on unimportant details or subplots instead of the primary story arc, ignoring the emotional journey of the protagonist and not wanting to give a hint of how the story ends.

  An incredibly brilliant concept. In this case, a sci-fi take on a piece of classic literature. Something I wish I’d thought of myself and can’t wait to see on the screen.

  Suzanne Lyons

  Snowfall Films and WindChill Films

  Producer: Undertaking Betty; Jericho Mansions; Bailey’s Bitton$;

  The Heart Is Deceitful Above All Things; Candy Stripers

  Co-founder, Flash Forward Institute

  People (writers are the worst) are too vague, too wordy and too flowery; they use too many adjectives that don’t tell me anything. We just want to know what the story is about! I also hate hearing, “This is my life story.” It makes me crazy.

  When the pitch is really clear. Right away, I know what the genre is and what format it is in (script, treatment, etc). As the pitch continues I am clear who the protagonist is, and about the theme, the beginning, the middle and the end. Just these simple things make all the difference for me to make my decision as to whether or not it is something for my company.

  It also helps when there is enthusiasm, when the

  words they choose reflect the tone of the project, and when they tell me what’s new, what’s exciting, what’s the hook! Why is it a movie and not an MOW? If a studio is going to put $15 million into making it, and you’ve got three killer sentences (60 seconds) to get us hooked, each sentence better be worth $5 million!!!

  Paul Margolis

  Screenwriter: John Carpenter’s The 13th Apostle; Ticker

  Writer/Producer: Pacific Blue; Sirens; MacGyver

  Professor of Film: Brooks Institute

  I guess I’ve been fortunate in that I’ve sold pitches to almost every studio, and a whole bunch of TV shows as well. So on some level, I feel like I’ve made pitching work for me in my career, in spite of the fact that I hate doing it. And certainly I’ve heard a lot of pitches; not only as a teacher, but also on the different TV shows I’ve worked on and produced. I’ve heard tons of writers come in to pitch stories, as well as agents pitching a particular client who had an idea for an episode. And what it all really comes down to is the concept.

  It really doesn’t matter how skillful you are as a pitcher. There are people who are better than others, there’s no doubt about that. But when I think about the pitches that I’ve sold, and the ones that I’ve bought as a producer on TV shows, it’s always just been about a great premise. So my hugest piece of advice would be, if you don’t have an incredibly great concept, it doesn’t matter how good your pitches are.

  I’ve had stories that I thought were good, but they weren’t great, and I’ve gone all over town trying to pitch them to big producers, and they haven’t been bought. And then I’d have other situations where I didn’t feel confident about the pitch I was doing, but the idea was fantastic, and it got bought.

  People want to spend all this time and energy trying to figure out how to become master salesmen, and their energy is in the wrong place. They should put all that hard work — that seat-of-the-pants work — into figuring out, “Where is the greatness in the idea that I’m trying to develop?”

  If I tell you an idea, and I have to ask you what did you think about it, then I should throw it in the trash. It’s not good enough. I tell you as a person that’s sold scripts and written stories, there’s a certain sort of passion that you have about a story when you know it’s right. You don’t have to ask anybody — you can feel it in your blood.

  I once heard a producer say something to me that has always stuck in my head, and it was brilliant as far as I’m concerned. He said, “I have had more writers come in here and pitch and sell me a story in the first five minutes, and then unsell it in the next five minutes.” In other words, you can go too long on a pitch. You see that look in their eye like they’re into it, and you feel the necessity to keep going, and to tell more, instead of just shutting up, and walking away with a check.

  Kate McCallum

  Bridge Arts Media

  Founder: Center for Conscious Creativity

  A writer will ramble on and not get to the point or describe the genre up front. Or they start right in telling a story that is not succinct. Better to start with “This is a drama about …” or “This is a romantic comedy.” When you do this it automatically gets a listener engaged in a style, a tone, etc. I also like a one-liner up front, which can follow the genre description.

  Material based on true stories, books, etc., is always something that piques my interest. Or if the writer has specific expertise in the area the story is set in, or the type of character they’ve created. I am always interested in stories that push boundaries as well — stories that are innovative or unique.

  Esther Newberg

  Senior Vice President, Co-Director, Literary

  Department, International Creative Management

  The worst pitch I ever heard was at an ICM meeting with literary agents 25 years ago or more. It was from a television guy who said he was looking for Jaws, but with a tiger. The agent who repped Tennessee Williams got up and left the room.

  Signe Olynyk

  Writer/Producer

  Creator of the Great American PitchFest

  Pitching is a necessary evil, and it doesn’t come naturally to everyone. The good news is that for most writers, it usually gets better with practice. That’s where pitch fests and conferences are so important. They allow you the opportunity for critical “face time” with agents and production companies. At the Great American Pitch Fest, most participants meet with an average of 20 companies — which means they get to practice a lot of pitches.

  Producer Suzanne Lyons, who also runs the Flash Forward Institute, once estimated she had to give an average of 200 pitches before she sold a project. She has a great approach to pitching: every time she gives one that doesn’t sell, she looks at it as, “That’s one more pitch closer to a sale.” She’s right. You can’t sell your project if you don’t pitch it.

  The best pitches are:

  Sincere — the person pitching loves these characters and really cares about the story. They get excited talking about it. To say they are “passionate” sounds corny, but it’s true. This story is bursting out of them, and it engages the listener.

  Populated with relatable characters that are interesting and unique. Stereotypical characters are flat because they’re predictable and stale. I want to be intrigued by characters I can identify with, but who do and say things that haven’t been said or done before. Fresh is the key.

  Clear & Concise. The first thing I want to know is the genre (thriller, comedy, etc.) if it is a movie script, or format (series, sitcom, etc.) if it’s for TV. Then I want to know who the protagonist is, what they want, what their key obstacles are, and what they must do to overcome those obstacles — all in one or two tight sentences. Then I want to know the most important thing: What has the protagonist discovered abou
t themselves by the end of the script? If the “lesson learned” is a universal theme or truth that interest me, and the rest of the pitch suggests a well structured screenplay, I will request the script.

  Unpredictable. They pose questions that haven’t been asked before. A great pitch always leaves me wanting more.

  The worst pitches:

  … do not have a log line, the protagonist’s goal is unclear, and the writer insists on telling me every detail of their script from beginning to end. If a writer has not

  invested the time to learn how to pitch or develop a log line, it is unlikely they have mastered their craft as a writer. I hear and read hundreds of pitches every year. I want to work with professionals. A professional screenwriter knows how to pitch and how to write. They are skills that are equally important.

  … are from people who pretend to be knowledgeable about my company, and our credits. Please don’t lie to me and say you loved our films if you’ve never seen them. Whenever possible, try to research a company and know as much about them as you can. With the resources available, such as the Internet and trade papers, there is never an excuse for not knowing about a company. However, you can’t know everything. It’s reasonable to ask questions if you don’t know things about a company. Just don’t lie. There’s enough of that already in this business.

  … focus on selling the script versus building a relationship. As a producer and a creative person, I want to work with people I like and connect with. Chemistry is just as important to me as the story being pitched. In every meeting, I am evaluating whether the writer is someone I can spend the next six months, or longer, working closely with. Are they responsive to my questions and comments? Do they seem pleasant and easy to work with? Selling a script is not just about selling the script — it is also about selling yourself.

  … are when the writer has nothing else to pitch. Always have at least two more well polished pitches ready, just in case. If none of your pitches is right for that individual, use any remaining time to find out more information. What are they looking for? For film, or TV? What budgets? Is there a particular star or director they

  want to work with? Go on an “information quest” and use your time as effectively as possible, either to learn more, or to develop your relationship with them further.

  Every pitch meeting is an opportunity — to pitch yourself, AND to pitch your scripts. Whether it’s a phone call, an email, a pitch fest meeting, or a query letter, it is a chance to build a relationship with someone who can help build your screenwriting career.

  Neil Pennella

  President, Enora Productions

  Television and Internet Content Producer

  Clearly, the most aggravating aspect of a weak pitch is the inability to articulate the concept within a minute or less. It ranks up there in frustration with a lack of knowledge about the subject matter. I don’t mind if the idea is a bit fuzzy, as long as the communicator is enthusiastic and is willing to go into greater detail once you begin to question him/her.

  As with all discourse, particularly presenting a new concept, shorter and less complex sentence structures are always appreciated. And I do not appreciate a presenter taking up any real time explaining why a competitor’s idea was not good.

  I think back to a manuscript recently submitted about which the producer got me excited over the content of the piece. The pitch both challenged me and at the same time intrigued me. He asked me a provocative question: “What if I could explain to you that Shakespeare was not the author of any of ‘his’ plays? How exciting would it be to find out who really wrote the plays of Shakespeare?” It got my attention to think that this literary giant was only the ‘front man’ for far

  more urbane and intellectual persons who, for their own good reasons, did not want to be identified with play-writing. I just had to know more: it was the provocative question about subject matter that was important to me, an English Literature major in college, which wholly captured my attention.

  Jim Pasternak FilmDaDa

  Directing Teacher, Producer, Director: Certifiably Jonathan

  For me the ideal pitch is a short sentence that makes me laugh or gasp. The idea/premise/log line pitched is such an incongruous surprise that I have an involuntary response. Nothing intellectual can surpass or negate that initial reaction.

  Terry Rossio

  A common weakness is the failure to>Screenwriter (with Ted Elliott): Aladdin; The Mask of Zorro; The Road to El Dorado; Shrek; Pirates of the Caribbean 1, 2, and 3; (with Bill Marsilii): Deja Vu

  Commercial, filmic concepts are hard to come by; most short pitches fail not in presentation, but lack of content. The idea either can’t be a movie, or would be very difficult to become a movie, or just shouldn’t be a movie.

  Gold is to hear a story idea on a topic everyone knows, but there’s not been a film to exploit it yet. The approach sets up a clear filmic situation, with a promise of a compelling central character relationship. There’s a huge difference between “A student named James studies Korean to overcome feelings of low self-esteem”and “A young Shakespeare falls in love as he desperately tries to write and stage Romeo and Juliet.”

  Ellen Sandler

  Script Consultant, Screenwriter, Co-Executive

  Producer: Everybody Loves Raymond

  The most common mistake I hear? Way too many details — especially details involving the backstory and setup — and not enough consequences, or what I call the “so what?” factor. A writer will tell me what happens in great detail, but there won’t be much follow-up as to how that changes the character and what the character must do as a consequence. I’ll hear details, sometimes even camera shots, but I won’t hear a story.

  I was doing a demonstration workshop on pitching where a participating writer tried to pitch a long, involved caper movie which was coming across as complicated, confusing and going nowhere. I asked her some probing questions, and we figured out what it was really about. She then came up with one of the best short pitches I ever heard: “It’s about two people who are such good friends they’re willing to kill for each other.”

  I got an immediate identification with the characters, I knew they had passion, I knew things would go horribly wrong for them, I could guess that one or both of them would get killed, and most important, I wanted to find out how.

  Once you’ve got a pitch line that good, make sure the story matches it. The pitch will only get the script open; it’s the writing that will keep the pages turning until FADE OUT.

  Dr. Linda Seger

  Script Consultant, Seminar Leader

  Author: Making a Good Script Great; Creating Unforgettable Characters; Making a Good Writer Great; Advanced Screenwriting

  Most pitches are too long and don’t contain a sense of conflict, or story or character or theme. Writers tend to go on and on, “… and then they did this, and then they did that,” so it’s a series of episodes, rather than hooking the listener to want the details.

  I usually recommend that people work up an elevator pitch of about 20-60 seconds, and then a pitch of 3-5 minutes, and then a pitch of 15-20 minutes, with all the basic story beats of Act I, II and III. If they can possibly shade in a sense of the conflict, story, character and theme, at least with the longer pitches, that’s good too, although sometimes they can shade in some sense of these other elements even in a short pitch.

  The pitch had conflict and originality. It was a subject matter that I didn’t know much about, but that intrigued me. I sensed the person knew what s/he was talking about. I sensed the person had done some study and knew something about screenplays, so that it would be worth my time to read the script. (Of course, I read for a fee, but some pitches make me look forward to the assignment more than others.)

  Paul Jay Shrater

  Cornucopia Pictures

  Writer-Producer

  Here are what I consider to be the primary weaknesses of most query letters and pitches, along with rules for improving them:
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br />   Lack of confidence in presenting your own material. If you aren’t enthusiastic about it, why should I be?

  Overselling. I don’t care about some big producer who supposedly loves your work — if he didn’t work with you on selling it, there must be a reason why. And I don’t need a cover letter full of adjectives about how great the script it.

  Lack of focused attention. I don’t want to see an email that is copied to 100 other producers — it’s not worth my time competing for a script when I don’t even know if it’s good yet.

  Rambling. If you can’t tell me your story in a clear and concise manner, odds are, it’s also going to be all over the place on the page.

  All I need is a hook. Many times, one sentence is all that is needed to get my interest in something. A writer I worked with once called this the Air Force One rule, meaning that movie can be pitched as, “Air Force One gets hijacked.” That’s all you need. In most cases, the hook is what eventually sells the project.

  Measured follow-ups. Pestering is bad, but follow-up is great. Producers’ and executives’ schedules are very busy, but if you are on their minds here and there, a small emotional connection can be made. If the follow-up is too often, it can be a nuisance.

  Don’t do the hard sell. Executives and producers evaluate the writer based on whether they would feel comfortable working with them for years. If the writer is difficult from the get-go in regards to deal points and/or collaborative creative issues, even if the script is good, sometimes it will elicit a pass from the executive