Selling Your Story in 60 Seconds

by Michael Hauge

  She put us in the shoes of the protagonists — where we were dragged, bound and gagged along with them. We identified with the dilemma and the big theme, and we were dying to know how WE were going to get out of that impossible situation.

  Always, it’s that idea where you see the soul behind the concept, and you wish you’d come up with it.

  Paul Dinas

  Senior Acquisitions Editor, Alpha Books/Penguin USA

  My pet peeves include: pitches that are inappropriate for my program or list; unclear, rambling descriptions that talk around the project rather than directly to it; no comparisons to similar works already in the marketplace; no direct answer to “Who’s the market?;” no clear idea of why this author is the best one for the project.

  Energy and confidence in the presentation. Humorous insights into the marketplace. Precision — why this is stronger than any other pitch on the topic. Emphasis on the author’s expertise or their platform for promotion.

  Rona Edwards & Monika Skerbelis

  Edwards Skerbelis Entertainment

  Producers; Consultants

  Authors: I Liked It, Didn’t Love It: Screenplay Development from the Inside Out

  The most common weaknesses we encounter are:

  • The writer is not able to articulate the premise in a couple sentences, or reveal the major beats of their story and the main characters in three to five minutes.

  • The writer is unsure of the genre.

  • Some writers compare their story to two films, but once you hear the pitch it’s nothing like the films they are referring to.

  • The writer overcomplicates the story with unnecessary information that doesn’t move the story forward.

  We heard a 15-minute family comedy pitch from a young writer who was articulate in pitching the story. We were able to visualize the plotting as it unfolded, and we clearly understood and related to the main character.

  The writer also had smart answers to our questions, and we were able to brainstorm on the spot, so we invited the writer to send us the screenplay. After reading the screenplay we had some notes for the writer who handled them with intelligence, and eventually we optioned the material.

  Daniel Fridell

  Noble Productions, Sweden

  Writer/Director: Cry; Swedish Beauty; Say That You Love Me

  Producer: At Point Blank; Bloodbrothers; Children of Buena Vista

  I hear lots of (usually dreadful) short pitches. If they don’t catch me in the first sentences, they never do. It has to be edgy, high concept or original, otherwise I have to do the job for them.

  Very seldom do I get a pitch where I engage in the character from the beginning, or one with a splendid start scene or sequence that makes me want to know more. I want to be told about something I didn’t know about, a story that’s exciting and is worth listening to, and is therefore worth telling, or making into a movie.

  After a while you’ve heard all the stories; then it’s the original subject matter that’s important. Someone once told me that in Kurdistan, criminals use birds as torpedoes and as thieves — they let the birds transport poison into peoples’ food and train them to steal other people’s birds. Then he started the pitch. That made me read the story, and then invest in the film — an original idea about something I didn’t have a clue even existed.

  Ginger Earle

  Screenwriter; Development Executive: TV/Film Seminars and Workshops; Screenwriting Instructor: California State University Northridge

  One thing that will immediately reveal that you’re an amateur is bringing props or promotional materials, such as photos of stars who could play each major role, business cards or flyers promoting your script. This will also reveal something terrible (but possibly true) about your script: It’s been around a long time. It also means your idea isn’t fresh and new anymore.

  Of course, in reality you’ll rework your scripts for years before even trying to sell them. But buyers don’t want to read old, overworked and previously rejected material. So no matter how old, overworked and previously rejected your script actually is, using props in your pitch proves that you’ve been shopping this idea around for a long time. No one else wanted it, so why would we?

  While working at Miramax, my supervisor told me that he’d actually rather see a script with typos and spelling errors than one with a fancy cover and color pictures, because the typos mean that the story is so hot off the press, so new and fresh and original, that the writer didn’t even have time to proof it, let alone come up with headshots of all the potential actors that could star in it.

  Julian Friedmann

  Literary Agent

  Editor: ScriptWriter Magazine (London)

  They are too long; they start in the wrong place; they try to tell you the story rather than what kind of story it is; they fail to give you a connection between the writer and the story and — very common — they are bad ideas for movies and could be stage or radio plays.

  “A mother realizes that her teenage son has probably killed someone.“ I was hooked because I knew the way in, that I would get caught up emotionally, and that there would probably be a tough and moving payoff. Actually, the script didn’t quite live up to the pitch (another reason not to take pitches too seriously).

  Ken Greenblatt

  Literary/Talent Agent, Paradigm

  The most common pitching mistake is not hooking me into the idea quickly. I need to know what the “big concept” is right up front. Also, I’m often surprised when a writer is pitching a comedy and yet fails to make me laugh during the pitch. I need some assurance that the writer knows comedy.

  When I’m hearing a pitch from a new writer, I’m listening for the new high-concept idea. It must be fresh and original. If I believe that the movie hasn’t been done before, is relevant today, and is “highly castable,” then I’m in.

  Jon Gunn

  Lucky Crow Films, IndieProducer.net

  Director/Producer/Writer: My Date with Drew; Mercy Streets

  The most common weakness is pitches that are unfocused. A good pitch should start general and get more specific. Give me an idea of what kind of movie you’re pitching me (“an action adventure set in India”) before you tell me funny lines of dialogue or the quirky characteristics of your hero. I recommend the following steps:

  One: Tell the title of the script and genre.

  Two: In a few sentences, explain the plot in broad strokes: “A lonely New York bookkeeper discovers a treasure map in an old almanac, and decides to travel to India to find a priceless historical artifact. On the way, he meets a beautiful young woman who is also searching for the treasure. After falling for her, he realizes she has been sent to kill him once he has decoded the map. But his intelligence and bravery win her over, and together they thwart her evil employers and share the treasure.”

  Three: Now fill in the details and anecdotes that make your story unique. Help the person you’re pitching to see the movie in their head. Here’s where you can help them understand the specific tone of your script. Explain especially fun sequences or memorable moments that will leave them wanting to read the screenplay.

  Sometimes it’s as simple as a great concept with a great title. Other times I’ve been persuaded by a comparison to a film I love: “It’s a British version of Rushmore.” (Yes, that does sometimes work.) But usually it’s something specific and unique.

  If I respond well to the concept and then the person pitching tells me “stories” about certain scenes that are funny or powerful, I find that I want to read the whole thing. Most importantly, a great pitch is always confident and passionate.

  Matt Hader

  Screenwriter; Producer; Board Member: The American Screenwriter’s Association

  Short pitches should be short — and sweet. The quicker the better. Often times, they’re not. If a person can make their point and get the producer to agree to read their screenplay with the fewest words possible, most times it shows they’ll also have a succinct stor
ytelling sense.

  It was a great “what if” type pitch. Especially because the killer “what if” was followed by an even stronger “and then” scenario. Short, sweet and to the point.

  Heather Hale

  Heather Hale Productions

  Writer/Producer: The Courage to Love; The Evidence; Lifestyle Magazine; Dollar$ and Sense; Psychology: The Human Experience

  Writers who ramble on and on and on and on, who don’t know their own story well enough to share it, who stumble over the details (e.g. too many names for either of us to keep straight), who aren’t committed enough to their own choices to defend or clarify them, or who don’t reveal the genre until halfway through the pitch — or worse, until they’re done.

  In more cases than not, it’s the writer’s passion. I wonder, “What is it about this story that has gotten so under his/her skin that he/she is compelled to tell it?” That piques my interest.

  Sometimes it’s hearing my own words describing what I was looking delivered back to me effectively. One writer had scoured my former production company’s website, and had done his research and due diligence on me, my company and what we were all about. He described his story as “sexy Disney,” which was the exact phrase we had used in our own material.

  Writers who have won multiple contests with their screenplays, who have genuine interest from professionals in the industry, or who show a pattern of third-party endorsements, will certainly be of interest as well.

  Janet Harrison

  CEO and Producer, Gothambeach Entertainment

  Trying to tell too much of the story is probably the most common weakness. It makes the pitch too long, unfocused and, ultimately, usually boring. Instead of being left with wanting to know more and that being the focus of my questions, I end of up asking questions as I try to figure out, “What is the story?”

  What persuades me is always a combination of passion, the ability of the “pitcher” to quickly create a visual picture for me and a unique story. I have to be left with the feeling of “wanting to know more.”

  Alli Hartley

  Director of Development, Tomorrow Films

  I hate it when people tell me how to sell a script, especially if they’re new writers. You don’t need to tell me a script has a strong female lead, or will be marketable because of its similarity to whatever blockbuster. It’s my job to know that. It also wastes time that you should be spending on telling your story.

  I also hate it when writers or managers bring in a personal anecdote to explain how powerful their story is. If you care about your drug addict heroine because a friend struggled with drug addiction, it’s sad, but it doesn’t tell me whether or not you’re a good writer. In these cases, I just end up feeling like the author is trying to manipulate me into reading the script out of pity.

  If the author can deliver a joke well, that’s huge. A joke is a story unto itself, and if the author’s joke is well timed, set up and delivered, it says to me something about his knowledge of the mechanics of storytelling. It also says something about his sense of humor and personal writing style.

  John E. Johnson

  Avon Fields Productions

  Executive Director, American Screenwriters Association

  The most common weakness in short pitches I’ve heard is that the pitch is not told succinctly, passionately and in a manner that would entice me to want to know more. Writers need to remember they aren’t pitching “a script” — the words on the page — they’re pitching the whole movie. What’s the point of your story, and why is it worth telling? Who are the main characters, why should we care about them and what’s at stake for them if they don’t succeed?

  The pitch left the person’s mouth, entered my psyche and wouldn’t let go until I begged to know more.

  Simon Kinberg

  Genre Films, Inc

  Screenwriter, Producer: Mr. and Mrs. Smith; X-Men 3

  I think the biggest weakness is always about scope. Often,writers and producers don’t realize that pitches are notscreenplays or movies. They’re a separate medium, withseparate narrative conventions. You can’t tell the entirefilm in 15 to 20 minutes. You need to aggressively condense the story and characters. You need to sell the bigidea, then use the basic story structure and character arcsto underpin that idea. It’s like a trailer for a movie — youare only selling the most salient points.

  I think good pitches are structured like newspaper articles. You have the big headline — the hook. Then the first paragraph gives you the overall story and main characters. Then the body of the article gets into the details. In my experience, good pitches tend to spend a lot of time on the first act (setup) and third act (payoff), without dwelling on all the machinations of the second act.

  It was the basic idea — fresh and original, but also conforming to existing genres. It’s a difficult balance — because audiences want new voices, new stories, but they also want the familiar package when it comes to commercial films. I know that any pitch I’ve sold as a writer always looks a bit like another successful movie (for instance, Mr.and Mrs.Smith resembling True Lies), but they’re fundamentally different under the surface.

  Ken Lee

  Vice President, Michael Wiese Productions

  A short pitch should have four things: a brilliant introduction of the person who is pitching that establishes their credibility; a strong hook for the subject matter that establishes the unique qualities of the project; a clear understanding of the target market; and a realistic assessment of the market potential.

  I like it when a pitch blends the abstract part of the business with the analytical part of the business effortlessly.

  Ken Levine

  Writer/Producer: M*A*S*H*; Cheers; Frasier; The Simpsons

  They start pitching the story before telling me the log line. When they’re talking and I’m thinking, “What is this about?” they’re dead.

  A great idea. A “Damn! Wish I had thought of that!” idea.

  Paul S. Levine

  Entertainment Attorney, Literary Agent

  People assuming I know what they’re talking about. They tell me a story from the middle to the end, and forget to tell me the beginning, so I have no idea what they’re talking about.

  It was a pitch from a former journalist. In my experience, journalists are the best people at telling a story in terms of who, what, where, why, when and how. And they cover all of that in the very first paragraph of their pitch. So a pitch that tells me where we are, when we are, who we’re talking about, what happens, etc — the basic elements of the story.

  Frederick Levy

  Management 101

  Producer: Unknown; Frailty

  The biggest mistake people make is they’re just not prepared. They sign up for these pitch fests a month or two in advance, they know it’s coming, they know they’ve got five minutes or ten minutes or whatever the time constraint is, and they know what they need to be able to convey in that short amount of time, yet they do very little preparation to actually be able to make a sensible pitch.

  I feel like 90% of the people I meet at these festivals didn’t put any thought into what they were going to say to me. They just show up and say, “Let me tell you about the story I wrote.” Which would be okay if they were able to tell me about the story they wrote, but most of them get too nervous and flub it up.

  You need to be prepared at all times. You have no idea when the opportunity will come — you’re at a cocktail party and somebody says, “Oh, what are you working on?” Boom — you go into your pitch. If you’re not prepared, how are you going to seize those opportunities?

  I’m not sure if I can pinpoint a specific one, because I’ve heard so many, but I can say this: the more high concept your idea, the easier it is to pitch. You can pitch a high-concept idea in one sentence and get me hooked and excited.

  Pitching a drama is the most difficult task there is, because dramatic or epic or period movies can’t be summed up in a line. It takes ten or twenty minut
es to develop the characters and the story so the other person understands what you’re getting at. Pitching a comedy or genre film is much more doable. Pitching is a very important skill, but I think it’s more appropriate for some stories than for others.

  Christopher Lockhart

  Executive Story Editor, ICM

  A common weakness is the failure to communicate the heart of the story — the core of the drama. In a short pitch, there isn’t a lot of time to dwell on the unnecessary. The writer must get to the most important piece of information: what the story is about. There’s lots of talk about backstory and setup, but the writer fails to let us see the dramatic throughline of the screenplay, which is often communicated through the log line.

  However, the biggest weakness may be that writers fail to allow the listener to “see the movie.” A good pitch should enable me to see the movie, picture the stars, understand the demographics, know how many screens it will open up on, and even envision the poster. “A New York City cop travels to Los Angeles to reconcile with his wife but learns she’s been taken hostage by terrorists in a skyscraper — and he struggles alone to save her. It’s called Die Hard.” In a nutshell, that allows us see the dramatic throughline, the trajectory of the story and helps us envision the other factors that go into selling movies.