Defiant

by Ursula Sinclair

  Prof held tight, squeezing my shoulders, harder.

  “You have done enough to my family.” My dad was suddenly standing next to us, his face unreadable. “Let my son go.” He curled a meaty bandaged-wrapped fist around the Prof’s wrist. Dad showed no sign of pain as he gazed at the Prof through clear eyes. “Dachs is my only child, and I will kill you to save him.”

  The grimace on my mentor’s face—I never thought I would see that. I found no pleasure in his true nature being revealed—more so embarrassment. I’d once reveled in his line of shit. My dad, for the first time in my life, I saw him as a hero. He was always the quiet one, between him and my mom. My father is the force behind my mother that enforced her rules.

  Surgical staff and doctors filled the little alcove and broke the tension. My dad and I twisted in unison to face them. Beyond them, down the hallway, a familiar woman rounded the corner and hesitated in her steps. I narrowed my eyes—Harper? The doctor began speaking, I refocused on the man in the white coat, but what he was saying didn’t make sense.

  “No!” My father screamed, falling to his knees. The woman he’d been married to for almost thirty years was gone.

  I snapped my head back. I didn’t hear right. “No, she was fine earlier...I talked—I talked—this morning—” I was repeating the same words over and over again. The doctor was wrong.

  “I’m sorry. The burns were substantial, covering over sixty percent of her body. Her heart stopped on the table—several times. There was nothing further we could do.” The damn doctor speaking droned on.

  Everything in me crumbled. We never had a chance to reconcile. I was going to spend the day with her tomorrow, to sit down and talk without yelling at each other. I peered past the group surrounding me, looking for one person—the woman that had grown so important so quickly to me. God, I needed her.

  Harper.

  She was there a moment ago; I was sure of it. What was she doing here? Was she hurt? People around me were closing in, suffocating me.

  I shoved my way through the group and sprinted down the passage. Slipping around the corner, I met a dead end. There was no one in the short hall. Only a window and an exit with a small sign beside the door denoting steps. I slammed into the bar that released the locking mechanism and the heavy metal barrier swung open. Antiseptic, white-painted flights of steps led up and down, away from the landing. Flood lights above the door illuminated the area.

  Harper was halfway down the flight of stairs and moving fast. I charged after her taking the stairs two at a time. She was on the next landing down before I caught up with her. I grabbed her by the elbow and spun her around.

  Tiny red dots splattered her shirt. Faint gray streaks marred her cheeks. I curled my hands around her face, tilting it from left to right, searching for the source of the red specks. Blood splatter. Was it hers? “Are you alright?”

  “What did you do?” she whispered.

  Do? Me? Hell, my mom was gone. I had only ever tried to figure out what the hell everyone was up to.

  Harper touched gentle fingers to the place just below my eyes. “You’ve been crying.”

  I eased her fingers away to pat my cheek. I didn’t realize that tears had flowed. My head hurt and the pressure, as if my brain was about to explode. Nothing, no words came to mind. How could I explain the train wreck going on in my head? I was running on pure emotion. I yanked Harper closer. I needed a reality check to make sure I wasn’t dreaming. Her lips were so close, and her eyes were wide.

  I crushed her lips under mine and slid my tongue along the seam of her mouth. Open for me, I willed in my mind. With the slightest gap I pressed my tongue forward past her teeth, licking at the inside of her cheek. Slowly, I walked her back, devouring her mouth, sucking her lips between my teeth as we moved. A hollow thud, and we could move no farther. I pushed my body into hers, shoving my leg between her thighs. Fabric from my shirt bunched in her fists at my sides. A myriad of scents drifted to my nose. Her perfume, sweat, food…shit, she could have been killed—died a miserable death like my mother. It wasn’t too late. I had to protect her. I cocked my head to the side and rammed my body harder against hers. Her heartbeat thudded against my chest, or maybe it was mine, reaffirming my—our survival.

  Harper is my shelter in my totally fucked up world. It was selfish, but I wasn’t giving her up. There was nothing I wouldn’t do to make sure she survived the hell I had descended into. “What happened…I had nothing to do with.” I broke our kiss and whispered. But, I would get to the bottom of the bullshit. Those that killed my mother would pay. One way or another.

  23

  Harper

  I should hate him.

  Serena could have been killed by the explosions. It was all so chaotic and like a scene from an apocalyptic movie, except this was no movie set. I will not soon forget the sounds of people screaming or the suffocating smell of smoke in the air. I could still smell it on my clothes. I’m still not exactly sure what happened. One minute I was staring at Dachs, then all hell broke loose. Someone knocked me to the ground, and that might have actually saved me from the flying debris.

  But not Serena—thank God, at least her wounds were all superficial, mostly from flying glass, and she suffered a mild concussion when she’d fallen. We were lucky, our entire group was okay, but others were seriously hurt. The emergency room had been crowded. I’d heard the nurses talking about a woman in critical condition. And all because of a bunch of shit for brains.

  Dachs.

  My heart caught in my throat when I remembered seeing him with those thugs. Was he hurt in the blast? Why should I care? In all the confusion, I lost sight of him and when I saw all the blood on Serena’s face, I panicked. I knew we had to get her help. Did he have something to do with those bombs, my friend, and all those people getting hurt? My heart stuttered—after last night, everything we were becoming...

  No. Please God, no.

  “Hey, you okay?”

  I came out of my fog and smiled at Serena. There was a large bandage over her eye; she might have a scar on her eyebrow. From all the blood, we thought it was her eye; thank Christ it wasn’t. She had a few cuts on her neck but nothing that would scar. “Yeah, yeah, sorry. I’m fine. I think I need to get a soda or something. I need something to wake me up. Do you want one?”

  “I’m good.”

  The nurse came over to tell Serena once her folks got there, she’d be released to go home; she shouldn’t be alone for the next twenty-four hours. I’d called her parents as soon as Serena had been placed in the ambulance.

  “Their flight already landed; they should be here soon,” Serena told her. “I hope James’ hands will be okay.”

  James had come with us to the hospital; he’d suffered from cuts too from the glass blasting onto the sidewalk. He’d raised his hands to protect himself. I hadn’t even realized his hand had been cut up. His dad had showed up and had just taken him home. Steven had gone with them.

  “He’ll be fine. You both will.”

  “You’re right,” she smiled.

  I gave Serena a hug. We both knew this could have been much worse.

  “Where can I find a vending machine?” I asked the nurse.

  “The one on this floor is broken, so two floors up.”

  “I’ll be right back.”

  Just my frigging luck the beverage machines were two floors above. Imagine my shock when I got off the elevator and saw those skinhead assholes standing around, right near the vending machines. Worse, I spied Dachs. He had a jacket on, but he was still dressed like the rest of them. I turned to get back on the elevator, but it was already heading up. I wasn’t about to wait for the next one in case he saw me. I turned and headed for the stairwell. I’d only made it down one flight when I heard the door above me slam shut. I didn’t bother to look up. I already knew who was behind me. I heard his footfalls pounding down the stairs. Crap, it sounded like he was leaping over a few of them. I wasn’t going to break my neck to get away from him
, but I didn’t stop either.

  I’d just reached Serena’s floor when my arm was grabbed, and he spun me into him. Even my voice sounded pathetic when I spoke to him. “What did you do?” I had to say it twice. When he told me he had nothing to do with what happened, why do I believe him?

  What madness was this that I didn’t immediately push this man away—or slap him. Instead, when he drew me to him, I went. I did more than that, I melted into him. Perhaps it was the raw need and pain I saw within the depths of his icy blue eyes or the tracks of tears. Lord, the tears still hovering on his eyelashes were my undoing.

  For the span of time we remained in that stairwell—was it two minutes or two lifetimes—it was not enough. He devoured me with his mouth as if I was the only thing anchoring him to this life. I felt every part of him as he walked me backward until he had me up against the wall. I enfolded my arms around him and drew him closer. I needed to be closer to him.

  I wrapped one leg around his muscular thigh. He grabbed my leg and raised it higher, pulling it up around his waist. Without releasing his lips from mine, he pressed me against the wall using his body to pin me there. At the same time, he took my other leg and placed that too around his waist. We settled into our own little world with my back pressed against the cool wall, and his heat resting at my front. Just as we had been in the elevator. Just as we had been only last night. I moaned, unable to think straight from the emotions clouding my mind. So much heat I thought I would go up in flames if I didn’t have him inside of me. He pressed that hard body into me, and I think we both moaned. A door slammed somewhere, echoing through the stairwell, bringing us back to reality. This was insane.

  He didn’t immediately release his hold on me, nor did I want him to. In that moment, the world could have ended, and I wouldn’t have given a damn. What was wrong with me? He followed a path of hate and yet…there was no hate between us.

  It was at that moment, he removed his mouth from mine and let my legs down, but he didn’t let me go. I stood on shaky legs as he rested his head against mine. His body shook. He released his tears. Something was very wrong.

  “What…? What happened?”

  “My mo…my mother’s dead.”

  “Oh my God! I’m so sorry.” I hugged him to me, and he held me tight, his head resting on my shoulder.

  “This wasn’t supposed—not this—not killing,” he whispered.

  “Oh, baby, I’m so sorry. Can you tell me what happened?” I didn’t want to add to his pain, by telling him that hate and violence leads to only one conclusion.

  He raised his head and shifted. I saw the tears shining in his eyes, the fresh tracks on his face.

  “I’m sorry. So fucking sorry. I didn’t know,” he whispered.

  I knew what he meant. He was with those assholes.

  “They killed my mother, and you could have been fucking hurt too.”

  “What?”

  “My brothers, men who I have known for years, guys I supported, who supported me, killed my mother. My mom. It’s not like no one knew who she was or where our business was. Something just feels—all wrong.”

  I was floored. “Wait, how? What?”

  “Some of them, created bombs, and those were tossed into the crowds. I had nothing to do with that shit. I swear, I didn’t know. One of those Molotov cocktails got thrown into my family’s fucking shop. Where my…my mom was standing.”

  He stepped away from me and leaned against the wall, but he clasped my hand, lacing our fingers together.

  “She’s dead, they killed her, Harper. Assholes, I have stood with for years, murdered her.”

  I felt the anger in his words. This time I was the one who turned into him and held him close. My mind raced with what he’d just told me. I might have hated him walking with those Nazis, but he was the one who paid a steep price. “What now? What are you going to do? Will you go to the cops?”

  “No cops.” He raised his hand and touched the side of my face. “I need to get out of here.”

  “What about your father? Don’t you need to be with him now?”

  “I can’t… This is my fault. I’m not ready to face him again. He’s…he’s not a part of this. Besides, they are still upstairs waiting on me.”

  That pissed me off. “Let them wait.”

  “I need to get out of here.”

  My phone buzzed. I checked it and saw a text from Serena. Her parents had arrived, and they were ready to leave. I shot her a text letting her know I was on my way back. I’d left my purse with her. I’d go get that and then get Dachs and myself out of there. We needed to talk.. But, not today, tonight, he needed to grieve for his mother.

  “Stay right here,” I told Dachs. “I’ll be right back.”

  “Where are you going?”

  “My friend’s here.”

  His face flushed even more. “Was she hurt from the parade?”

  I stared at him. He wasn’t the only one suffering from his actions, he needed to know those actions cost a lot of people. “She got a little cut up and has a mild concussion, but they’re releasing her right now. Her folks are here to take her home, but she’s got my purse. Let me grab it, and then I’ll get us out of here.”

  He took my hand and squeezed it. “I’m sorry. Will she be all right?”

  “Yes. She’ll be fine.”

  “Are you sure you want to do this?”

  I didn’t hesitate. “I’m damn sure.”

  “Be careful. There are White Pride brothers everywhere here.”

  I nodded and slipped out the stairwell.

  24

  Dachs

  We escaped through the employee exit through the ER. In all the confusion, no one paid us any attention as we made our way around the building. Harper made arrangements for an Uber that pulled up as we rounded the corner to the entrance. I grabbed the handle and snatched the door open, ushering her in and sliding into the seat beside her.

  I glanced at her profile, conflicted. Not that anyone knew about her or where she lived. If anyone saw her with me…a sinking feeling churned in my belly. I’d already been a part of so much destruction. The last thing I wanted to do was bring trouble to Harper’s door. The drive was quiet, each of us wrapped up in our thoughts. I pulled my cell free.

  I’d left my father alone to deal with my problems. I flipped the device over in my hands and looked over to find Harper peering at me. There was an understanding and genuine kindness in her eyes that I never saw with those men and women I practically grew up with.

  She stilled my movements. “Call your dad.”

  My father was completely alone. My mom’s loss sat heavily on my shoulders. Would he blame me for her death?

  Harper squeezed my hand in encouragement. “Call him.”

  I scrolled through the contact list and tapped the screen. The continuous ringing felt never ending. The longer it took for my father to answer, the tighter my chest constricted.

  “Hello.” My dad’s strong, solid tone filled the earpiece.

  “Dad,” My voice cracked.

  “Are you okay? Safe?”

  With everything happening, my old man was worried about me? I couldn’t hold my misery in any longer. I was an asshole who played a part in my mother’s death. “I am s-sorry—s—so very sorry.” I leaned forward, curling in on myself, and sobbed.

  Harper covered my back with her body, wrapping her arms around my shoulders.

  “Son.” My dad’s tone dropped. “Police are here and although those men have left me alone, I saw one of them loitering near the men’s room. Are you safe?”

  “Yes.”

  “You are all I have left. Your mom, she believed in your goodness. You must stay safe.”

  “I know.” I hiccupped. I couldn’t stop the flow of tears.

  “Everything will be alright. I am okay. This is not your fault. This hatred, Son, it must stop. You cannot go on like this; your mama wouldn’t want you to.” My father’s voice broke. “Cut off your phone and don’t
let them find you. When I think it’s safe, I’ll post an open sign on the shop.”

  “Yes, Sir.” My dad had faith in me even though I had no faith in myself. I ended the call.

  Harper opened the back door and slid out, tugging me with her.

  I didn’t realize the car had stopped. I followed without thought. We were in the park at the front of her building. My thoughts were still processing what happened. Why hadn’t I caught on to what the Prof and Bruno were up to? A long exhale escaped through my lips. I hung back, our arms extended between us. I should have known. Why was I so damn stupid? I needed to think.

  “What’s wrong?” Harper turned and closed the gap between us.

  I looked around. The sun was shining. Fluffy white clouds rolled across a beautiful light blue sky. Large trees surrounded us; the chirps of birds could be heard. There was no outward sign of the turmoil that had occurred only miles away.

  Things weren’t sitting right. Where was Bruno? Prof only showed up with a few men, some of them newbies others—they belonged to Gage’s chapter. If I didn’t do what they asked…Shit. I was kept out of the loop for a reason. Was I the end plan, the scapegoat? I shook my head to clear it. “I think I’m being set up.”

  “What?”

  “Too many things are off. I organized the march—everybody knows that.” I was quiet for a minute to collect all of my thoughts. “Permits are under the organization name, but Becky, she supports our cause, pulled them. Prof gave Bruno a special project. It was me that did the foot work, though. I made sure we had milk and water in case of pepper-spray, bats and batons to protect ourselves in case we were attacked. I took care of our uniforms, set up the flags and notified each member of their responsibilities. I have organized these events numerous times, big and small. Public disturbance, fights, that I was ready for…”

  “Let’s go inside. We can talk about this in my condo.” She twined her fingers between mine and walked toward the building.