The Secret of Santa

by Liz Isaacson

  Ida met his eye, and that sobered him right up. In fact, he nearly choked, and when she laced her arm through Brady’s and approached her brothers, Ward stepped on away from Ranger and Ace.

  Ranger grinned at the two of them, and he stepped into both of them and wrapped his arms around them pair of them simultaneously. “Congrats, you two. I can’t wait to walk you down the aisle, Ida.”

  Ward pulled in a breath, his eyes widening. He met Ida’s round eyes, and then Ace’s. Ace nodded at Ranger’s back, as if to say, Go on now. Correct him.

  Ward shook his head just once. He couldn’t take that from Ranger.

  “Actually,” Brady said. “We—”

  “Actually,” Ida said over him. “We’re still trying to decide if we’re going to have a really traditional wedding or not.” She stepped back from Ranger and scanned everyone in front of her, her gaze skipping right past Ward.

  “When’s the date?” Mother asked, and Ida stepped into her and held her tight.

  “We haven’t picked a date yet,” Ida said. “I thought you could help me with that, Mother.”

  “Of course, dear.” She released Ida and hugged Brady. “I suppose you have busy times, right, Officer?”

  “Yes, ma’am,” Brady said.

  “You’ll live in town, I’m assuming,” Mother said, smiling.

  “Yes,” Ida said. “We both have a house, and we haven’t decided which one we’ll keep, or if we’ll get a new one entirely.” She gave a light laugh where Ward heard all the trepidation and all the uncertainty. “We basically haven’t decided hardly anything yet.”

  She gazed down at the ring, her face full of love. When she looked at Brady, she wore the same expression. Ida hugged Ace, and then she turned to Ward.

  He gave her the nicest smile he could muster, but his heart beat inside a box that was entirely too small. He still managed to open his arms, and she embraced him. “I’m sorry,” she whispered. “We should’ve talked to him privately, previous to announcing anything.”

  “Not your fault,” Ward whispered.

  Ida pulled back, but she stayed close to Ward, searching his face. “I’m sorry about bringing up Brady’s sister.”

  Ward shook his head. “It’s fine.”

  “I do think you should get out there again, Ward.”

  “I’ve tried, Ida.”

  She nodded, as she was never one to push him into conversations he didn’t want to have. She’d never pressed him at all. She loved him and accepted him for who he was and what he did, and he’d never had to be anyone but himself with his sister.

  She’d rescued him from one of his lowest lows, and he’d helped her in some of her most dire situations too. He really wanted to be the one to walk her down the aisle, but he couldn’t take that privilege from Ranger, not when the man was in such a precarious emotional state.

  “Ward,” Mother said, and Ward stepped further from Ida.

  “Yes, Mother?”

  “Come help me with these brownies.” She gave him a look that said she knew everything, and Ward’s throat tightened.

  He nodded, and said, “Yes, Mother,” and left Ida to keep celebrating with the rest of his siblings.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Preacher Glover sat on the couch in the living room at the homestead, the evening sunlight golden and gorgeous as it glinted around the room. The sense of family and acceptance here made him squirm, because he didn’t deserve to be accepted here.

  His unhappiness became so apparent when surrounded by so much joy, and he simply wasn’t comfortable inside his own skin, or inside his own family.

  He hadn’t felt like this until the past couple of years, and he’d placed the worst of his anger and frustration at himself on Arizona. Judge had placed it on Mister.

  Guilt streamed through him, and he reminded himself he had a plan for how to fix the rift between him and his sister. The bridge between him and Mister was still intact, though it could use some improvements too. He glanced across the room to Mister, and he certainly didn’t look happy either.

  Mister barely looked up from his phone when he was with the family, and Preacher often thought about him living in those cabins up by Zona and Mother by himself. No one else lived nearby, and Preacher wondered what the quiet would sound like up the hill, with no TV and no one else in the house.

  Preacher needed to find out. He needed to get away from Judge, who was so loud all the time, in every way, so he could figure out who he was.

  His phone buzzed in his palm, and he glanced at it since the meal hadn’t started yet. He fully expected Mother to start walking around with the basket, so he better get a message off to Mindi if he didn’t want to leave her hanging.

  She’d said: When will you be back in town?

  A smile touched his mouth, because it felt good to be wanted. A quick glance around the room, and he didn’t see a single person who actually wanted him here. If he slipped out the side door, who would even notice?

  Bishop was always wrapped up in what Bear, Ranger, and Cactus thought of him. He worked a lot with them, and he’d been so young when Daddy died. Preacher had never minded Bishop’s close relationship with Bear, but it did remind him that he didn’t have anything like that.

  Arizona had tormented him growing up, and Preacher had taken his dislike of her into adulthood, and he wished he could root out those memories and start fresh. She wasn’t the same person she’d been twenty years ago, and kids did stupid things. He wasn’t perfect, that was for sure.

  Another glance at Mister proved that. He and Judge had gotten in an argument months ago, and Mister had stormed out. He’d yelled that he never wanted to talk to Judge again, and as far as Preacher knew, they hadn’t spoken. He’d tried to reach out to Mister, and they talked enough to get their jobs done around the ranch. But Preacher wanted to be friends with Mister again. Real friends.

  Short of driving up to the cabin and knocking on the door, Preacher didn’t know what else to do. They all managed to congregate in the same space, but there were enough people to keep the oil and water apart, and Preacher played his part by staying away from Zona.

  Until tonight, he thought, his stomach buzzing with wasps.

  “All right,” Bishop said, and Preacher quickly typed out a message to Mindi.

  I don’t know. Why? You got something in mind?

  She always had something in mind, and Preacher knew what it was. Her on-again, off-again boyfriend had probably done something stupid, and Mindi would want Preacher to show up in his best clothes, his arm cocked so she could hang on him, and she’d kiss him as much as he wanted.

  He hadn’t minded the fake relationship—until his feelings had started to turn real. He’d backed off then, but every time Mindi texted and said she needed help, he showered, shaved, and showed up. He let the pretty blonde hang on him, and giggle in his ear, and kiss him as if they were real serious.

  Then, he might not hear from her for a while, or she might call the next day. Their longest stint had lasted about a month, and that was when Preacher had realized he actually liked Mindi for real.

  Might be fun to go caroling on Monday night.

  Preacher frowned at his phone. Caroling wasn’t his idea of a good time. Heck, going down to Three Rivers during the holiday season wasn’t his idea of a fun time. Dealing with the flashing lights for three months out of the year was enough to push Preacher to the brink of insanity, but he couldn’t ask Judge to back off on the light show he did every year. He really wanted to win this year, and he’d brought out thirty percent more lights.

  Thirty percent more flashing meant thirty percent less sleep for Preacher. He also didn’t have the heart to tell Judge he was never going to win the light show. The townspeople voted for the winner, and nobody drove all the way out to Shiloh Ridge to see his light show. He got less votes, because they got less traffic. Plain and simple.

  “Judge is gonna say the prayer,” Bishop said, and Preacher realized he’d missed the overview
of the food for that day. He didn’t care, because he could look at the spread on the fifteen-foot counter and see what he could eat.

  He tucked his phone underneath his leg and swiped his cowboy hat off his head. He closed his eyes and held his hat to his chest as Judge said a prayer over the food. He waited to feel something warm and spiritual.

  The zing in his chest came when Judge said, “Bless us all this Christmas season to remember our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ,” but other than that, he felt like his heart was made of stone.

  “Amen,” he said along with everyone else. Noise and chatter broke out instantly afterward, and Preacher stood up and turned around. The family had expanded in the past couple of years, and Preacher did love having Sammy, Oakley, and Montana in the homestead. He loved Lincoln and that blasted black and white cat that tried to give him attitude, though he was the newcomer.

  Everyone loved Benny, Preacher included, and tonight, Ace had brought Holly Ann to the family gift exchange and dinner. They’d do the gifts after dinner, and Preacher wished he could stop time and then turn it backward.

  He couldn’t, though, so it marched forward as they ate sweet and sour meatballs, buttery sticky rice, and plenty of gourmet vegetables. He loved the roasted veg with stuffing on top, and then a creamy, herby sauce covering it all.

  His mother sure did know how to get her sons to eat vegetables. He sat beside Judge and Ace, the two people on the ranch he got along with best. Holly Ann sat beside Ace, and she chatted with Judge about the horses here on the ranch, and he asked her about catering dinners once a week.

  “I don’t really do that,” Holly Ann said. “Dinner for you and Preacher? Once a week?”

  “Sure,” he said, looking from Preacher to Holly Ann. “Why not?”

  “Sounds like you need a wife,” Holly Ann teased, and Preacher sure did like her. Ace laughed, but it was too loud and didn’t quite fit in the conversation. Preacher looked at him in surprise, and Judge scowled at both of them.

  “I’m going to put the ice cream in the machine,” Etta yelled above the noise. “Let’s do the presents, and then we’ll have dessert.”

  People got up from the long table that could seat them all, and Preacher joined them. Always just going with the flow. Moving with the stream. Doing what everyone else did.

  For once, he wanted to jump ship. Swim upstream. Take a sharp left, and see if anyone noticed at all.

  Everyone noticed when Cactus left the family parties. Everyone noticed when Bear had a bad day. Everyone paid attention to Ranger and his well-being, because everyone loved Cactus, Bear, and Ranger.

  No one even thought about Preacher, and he hated feeling insignificant.

  It’s not true, he told himself. Just a couple of months ago, Bishop had given a presentation just before they’d decorated the angel tree. He’d mentioned that Shiloh Ridge would most likely move toward having foremen, so Bear and Ranger wouldn’t have to shoulder so much of the work.

  Preacher’s name had been mentioned as a possible foreman. He’d felt important then. He’d felt seen. In a family as large as his, that was huge, and he hated that it was so important to him. At the same time, Judge had counseled him not to ignore those feelings. It was okay to want to be important.

  He took a seat on a different couch this time, after retrieving his gift from the front steps. He’d drawn Arizona’s name this year, and he really wanted to make amends with her. His pulse throbbed in his throat as everyone finally found a place to sit in the huge living room. Having a room with enough seats was a blessing and a miracle, and Preacher did admire Bear for planning ahead and creating a place where they could all gather.

  Bishop and Montana had finished True Blue earlier this year too, and the old barn his father and uncle had built provided a beautiful place for the Glover family to gather too.

  “Okay,” Bear said. “Let’s get started. First, I wanted everyone to know that Ida and Brady got engaged this weekend.” He grinned at the couple, and Ida beamed around at everyone. Preacher clapped along with everyone else, his smile genuine for the first time that evening. He did love his cousin Ida, as she took care of everyone, for almost every family meal, and Brady Burton was a good man and a good cop.

  “Any other announcements?” Bear asked, and his gaze lingered on Ace and then Cactus. Neither of them said a word, and Preacher wondered what they’d say.

  Surely it was too soon for Ace and Holly Ann to be engaged, and Cactus? The man barely left the ranch. How could he have any sort of announcement?

  “All right,” Bear said. “We’ll have another family meeting the first week of January, for our annual ranch news. I’ll send a text for the date and time of that, if you’ll all send me times and dates that do not work for you. Okay?”

  Several people murmured their assent, and then Bear reached into a jar that Mother held. He pulled out a slip of paper, and said, “Mister.”

  Mister smiled and got up, his silver-wrapped package in his hands. “I got Etta.” He handed her the gift, both of them grinning.

  She stood up and gave him a hug. “Thank you, Mister.” She ripped the paper off the package to reveal a blue, flowery box of English tea.

  “It’s from England,” Mister said. “I may or may not have raided your pantry to see which brand you like. I ordered it online.”

  Etta stared at the box and then lifted her eyes to Mister. “I love this tea. They don’t make it for the US market anymore.”

  Mister pushed his cowboy hat forward, but he’d always been very, very good at giving gifts. Preacher swallowed, because everyone would be watching when he opened his gift, and then when Zona opened hers.

  He thought of a line from the letter his father had written to him before he’d died.

  Paul, we started calling you Preacher because of your gospel knowledge and the fact that you loved to tell everyone how to get along. Keep doing that, Preacher. They’ll need it, and you’ll be the uniting factor in the family.

  He’d literally scoffed when he’d read that paragraph, but it would not leave him alone. The words nagged at him, tugged at his conscience, whispered that he wasn’t doing what Daddy thought he should in every quiet moment in Preacher’s life.

  He had loved studying the gospel, and he’d even gone to the seminary for a year before returning to the ranch when Daddy fell seriously ill. He’d never gone back, and he didn’t miss it. He could study the gospel and think about religious things without having to stand up in front of a congregation and preach.

  He didn’t want to do that anyway.

  He wouldn’t know how to tell people to hold on when God went silent on them. He hadn’t been able to, and while he loved reading the scriptures and learning more about the life of the Savior, he often felt alone in this world.

  “I got Preacher,” someone said, and he pulled himself from his thoughts. He looked up at Ace as his cousin brought over a red-and-white striped bag. Tons of billowy white paper ballooned out the top, and Preacher stood and took the bag from Ace. “You’re going to love this,” he said with a smile. He grabbed onto Preacher and clapped him on the back, and Preacher did feel close to Ace.

  “I can’t wait,” Preacher said. He pulled the paper out of the top of the bag, finally finding a slim box, a wrapped case that felt suspiciously like a video game, and a bag of candy. He removed them and held them up. “Chocolate covered cinnamon bears.”

  He grinned at Ace, his mouth already watering. He loved hot candy, and nothing better than cinnamon bears.

  “I love those,” Sammy said, looking from Preacher to Ace. “Where did you get those?”

  “There’s a kiosk in the mall.” He took his seat over by the window again, and he didn’t seem very happy tonight either. Preacher had worked with him in the stables and played plenty of basketball with him enough to know, and he noted that Ace didn’t reach for Holly Ann’s hand.

  The box held a new phone case, with a simple design that spoke to Preacher’s crisp side. “Thank you, Ace.
” He unboxed the case and removed his current one, replacing it with the new one. He held it up. “It’s like Three Rivers.”

  “It is Three Rivers,” Ace said. “From your front porch. The town skyline.”

  Preacher grinned at the case, seeing the view in his mind’s eye. He’d stood on the front porch probably hundreds of times and gazed down the hill toward the town of Three Rivers. It was one of the only times he felt true peace and the pure love of God.

  He hadn’t done it for a while, and he really needed to. He needed some direction in his life, and he needed it from On High.

  He ripped the paper from the case, and it was a video game. Hoops 2K20, and he grinned from ear to ear. “Thank you, Ace. We should play tonight.” He lifted the game up as Ace nodded, his smile back on his face though his arms lay folded across his chest.

  Preacher tucked all of his gifts back into the bag, swallowed, and bent to pick up his gift. “I got Arizona.”

  The room inhaled together, and it felt like everyone held their breath. Preacher was holding his as he crossed the room to where Zona sat on the hearth with her fiancé, Duke. She released his hand and stood up, her eyes searching Preacher’s.

  His mouth felt like someone had wiped it out with cotton. The box had been wrapped in gold paper with a metallic snowman print, with a red bow tied around it. He paused a couple of feet from her.

  “I know we haven’t always gotten along real well,” he said, his voice low and scratchy and barely able to leave his throat. “I’m real sorry about that, and I’d really like to make things right and move forward.”

  “Me too,” Zona said, reaching to take the gift as Preacher extended it toward her.

  He took her into a hug and held her tight, saying, “I’m sorry, Zona. For whatever I’ve done that has hurt you.” He knew one of the biggest things he’d done, and he hoped this gift would make it right.

  “I’m sorry too, Preacher. You’re a good man, and I’m the one to blame for everything.”