True to Me

by Kay Bratt

  Elizabeth Senna—or Elizabeth Makena, whatever her name was—was just someone Carmen and Helen had talked into doing their dirty work. A paid criminal who took Nama—took her—to the mainland to hide her. According to Carmen, Beth was a good girl from a bad family, the only child of a couple embroiled in a dysfunctional marriage too chaotic to think much of the daughter they were neglecting.

  When Carmen and Helen presented the idea to Beth, they told her she’d never be able to contact her parents again.

  No love lost there, she’d told them. They wouldn’t know it if I fell off the earth and my ashes blew back in their faces.

  What they hadn’t planned for was Beth falling in love with Nama and the role of motherhood. Carmen said that the day she’d handed Nama over to Beth, there had been an uncanny affection between the two.

  Nama had nestled into Beth’s softness, preferring it to Carmen’s more matter-of-fact way of handling her.

  In the days leading up to their departure, Beth’s complete attention to Nama showed Carmen she’d made the right choice. When she conveyed this feeling to Helen, the woman arranged for new identification documentation, set up a healthy, anonymous account for them to live off, and then tried to push it to the back of her mind and help her daughter deal with the tragedy.

  Carmen took care of getting Beth and Nama off the island. It was a stressful situation, as at any moment they expected Beth to be arrested for kidnapping, but they looked the part of mother and daughter and made it through security without any trouble.

  As Carmen talked, Quinn let her head lie back on the headrest, watching the road ahead of them. Maggie asked a few questions here and there, but Quinn was too drained. After the first few miles, she felt like she was outside of her body, listening to a horrifying story being unraveled but not really being there. For some reason, the thought came to her that it was no wonder Carmen hadn’t married or had children. She probably thought she didn’t deserve them after what she’d done.

  According to Carmen, she was the only one to keep in touch with Beth, since Helen was too afraid to be connected to her. Helen had hoped that they could all move on and her deed would prove best for everyone.

  But after only a year, Helen had second thoughts when her daughter Jules couldn’t overcome her grief. She talked to Carmen, who relayed to Beth that she should bring the girl back. They created a scenario in which Beth would leave Nama somewhere safe and then make the call for the family to find her. They gave Beth a month to come to terms with it and make the drop. She was promised that no one would ever know she had taken the girl and told there’d be another deposit of a substantial amount of money—a gesture of gratitude for keeping Nama safe.

  “Beth told me she needed some time to think about it,” Carmen said. “But when it came down to the last days, I only got one more call from her. She’d completely panicked. You would’ve thought I was asking her to give up her own flesh-and-blood child. She said she didn’t want Helen’s money. She wanted to keep Nama.”

  “How did she think she’d get away with it?” Quinn asked.

  “She did get away with it,” Maggie answered.

  Carmen nodded. “Yes, she did, didn’t she? At least until now. I assume she knew Helen wouldn’t involve the law. She packed you up and just dropped off the radar. Disconnected her phone number and moved to an unknown address. She also drained the bank account Helen had set up for Nama’s ongoing care, though she’d claimed not to want money.”

  Quinn thought of her inheritance and now knew how her mother had accumulated such wealth and hidden it for so long. It must’ve been Helen’s money, invested from the time Quinn was a small child.

  “I don’t think she used much of it,” Quinn said.

  Carmen said they tried with all they had to find Beth and Nama. Carmen even went to Beth’s family. She didn’t tell them their daughter had Nama, just said she needed to get in touch, but they claimed they hadn’t heard from her. Her mother had the letter that Beth had left them, saying she was going out to make her own way, and then nothing else. Her father said he hoped she never came back, that she was just a drain on his bank account.

  Helen hired investigator after investigator, but they couldn’t find any trails leading to Beth or Nama.

  “Obviously, since now we know you’ve been in school and work, and even have a driver’s license, she did away with the documents that Helen provided her and arranged for new birth certificates and social security numbers,” Carmen said. “So she definitely used some of the money.”

  “But when Beth wouldn’t bring her back, why didn’t Helen tell Jules her daughter was still alive?” Maggie asked Carmen right before they arrived at Maria’s house. “She could’ve at least given her that.”

  “Yes,” Quinn added, still unable to connect with Jules as her mother but feeling pity for the woman anyway. “Why make Jules suffer even more?”

  “Because unless Helen could deliver Nama back to Jules, her daughter would hate her forever. She’d helped her disappear and now was nowhere to be found. It was better to let her think the girl drowned. Not only that, but I was complicit. I had found the girl—you, I had found you!—and I tried to end the battle with the Rocha family, only to become part of something that could get me thrown in prison forever. Helen thought her family had done enough damage to ours without adding more to it. She was also convinced that the curse was the reason we couldn’t get to you, and it was stronger than our will to find you.”

  “You were afraid of involving the authorities,” Maggie said. “Of going to prison.”

  “I was more afraid I’d never see you alive again,” Carmen said, taking her eyes off the road to look at Quinn.

  “Please don’t. That girl isn’t me. She was Nama,” Quinn said. She felt as though she were awake in a dream—or some sort of nightmare. She wondered about Jules, the woman who was her first mother, and felt a small rush of guilt that she didn’t feel any sort of longing to see her or know her.

  “Maybe they should take a DNA test,” Maggie said. “What if Quinn isn’t even Nama?”

  Carmen was shaking her head even before she answered. “What are the chances I would find a girl the same age and identical to the daughter Jules and Noah lost at sea? You don’t need a test. If you take one look at Jules and her other daughters, you’ll know. And she has the birthmark.”

  Other daughters. Quinn had sisters. And a brother. The one on the boat with her. Jonah. “What about their son? Surely they were glad at least one child was recovered,” she asked.

  Carmen nodded. “Of course they were. But that’s a whole other story. Jonah never forgave himself because he was supposed to be looking out for you. He was already a sensitive boy, and his childhood was ruined. He enlisted and came back from Iraq a broken man. Got tangled up in drinking and drugs too. He lives on the streets most of the time.”

  Quinn was taken aback. “He comes from a family with the resources to put him in any kind of program, and he’s on the streets? I don’t understand.”

  “The human mind deals with tragedy in different ways,” Carmen said. “Jonah decided to walk away from those who can help him. He chose to fight his demons alone. But he comes around his family occasionally. Just like any Hawaiian, the tie to family is a hard one to cut permanently.”

  Was that the reason Quinn had always felt a pull to go to Maui?

  “Quinn, their home is only a few miles away. You could see your mother and father tonight.”

  Father. Quinn couldn’t believe she’d started this crazy journey simply to find her real father and possibly some of her mother’s family. If she’d known her mother’s deathbed confession would lead to all this . . .

  “No, I want to go back to Maria’s right now,” Quinn said. She couldn’t even think about meeting anyone else right now. It didn’t feel right yet. It felt . . . disloyal, she supposed. Not that Elizabeth was really her mother, but then, she was. And despite the complete wrongness of what she’d done, she’d given Quinn
a good life and had loved her with every fiber of her being. Whatever her reasons for doing what she did, Quinn knew that love was at the root of it.

  “This is enough for one day,” Maggie said. “Please just get us back so that Quinn can rest.”

  Quinn was glad that Maggie was there and that she wouldn’t have to face the empty cottage alone with her thoughts.

  Both Helen and Carmen had promised not to say anything until Quinn was ready. It might not be soon, either, because she needed to take some time to process everything. If they were expecting a big, joyful family reunion, they were going to be sorely disappointed.

  Helen warned her that she might not be there if she waited too long. Her health was bad, and she admitted that she always hoped she’d be long dead before Nama was found. She dreaded facing her daughter when she learned what she had done, and Quinn couldn’t blame her. If Helen wasn’t already dead, she might be after Jules and her husband learned the truth.

  Jules’s husband. Quinn’s father. She still couldn’t believe it. A real, live father, her own flesh and blood—something she’d longed for her entire life. They’d barely said anything about him other than the fact that he’d grown into a decent person who had built his own legacy for his children, a legacy that wasn’t dependent on the Rochas’ money.

  “What’s their family name?” Quinn asked as they drew near to Maria’s house.

  “Monroe,” Carmen said. “Jules and Noah Monroe.”

  So her name was Nama Monroe. Or at least it used to be. What a day of discovery. She had a lot of information—and suddenly she had parents, siblings, and a grandmother—but now what was she supposed to do with it all? She simply wanted to get back to her cottage and find some privacy to make a call. There was one person she needed to talk to right away.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Quinn wasn’t going to find the privacy she needed anytime soon because when they pulled up to Maria’s house, there were at least half a dozen cars parked in the driveway and lining the street in front of the yard.

  “Something’s happened,” she said, feeling nervous as she thought of Kupuna. He wasn’t really a frail man, but he was the oldest person in the home. “This isn’t the night for Maria’s dinner.”

  “It’s probably about Pali,” Maggie said.

  “Do you need me to come in with you?” Carmen asked.

  “No,” Quinn and Maggie said at the same time.

  “Thank you, but just drop us off right here.” Quinn pointed at the corner. She spotted Liam’s truck and felt a rush of relief that he was there.

  Carmen came to a stop.

  “Listen,” she said, and Quinn paused, her hand on the door, “I know you say you aren’t ready to meet your parents. But please don’t leave Maui without letting Helen have closure for what she’s done. I can live with it either way, though I wish I could take it back. But that old woman has suffered for nearly three decades over her deed. The Rochas are a huge name in Maui, and when this gets out, she’ll probably do something rash out of shame, but it’s her last wish on this earth to see her sins undone.”

  “I still don’t see why you care,” Quinn said. “So much for sworn enemies.”

  She opened the door and climbed out.

  “Because I finally learned that revenge tastes bitter,” Carmen said. “Forgiveness is a much sweeter way to live, Quinn. I’m not asking for it from you, but I’ve given it to the Rochas from the Crowes. I’m willing to pay for my part in what we did. But Helen is frail. I beg you not to send her to jail.”

  Quinn shut the door without responding. Let Carmen have a night to worry about it. This wasn’t some practical joke gone awry. It was her childhood. Her life. And it had been taken from her. Even if Quinn felt sorry for the old woman, the emotion was buried under a simmering anger.

  Maggie was already out of the truck, headed up the driveway. Quinn knew she was exhausted too. And she could never thank her enough for sitting through that with her. She followed just as Liam was coming out of the house. When he saw them, he approached.

  “How did it go?” he asked, his voice sincere and full of concern as he examined Quinn’s face.

  Maggie let out a harsh laugh. “Like a Lifetime movie. I’m going to take a shower. I feel dirty.” She continued around the house to the cottage.

  “I have a lot to tell you, Liam, but first, what’s going on here?” Quinn asked.

  “Pali’s been in an accident. He was just released from the hospital.”

  “Is he okay?”

  Liam nodded. “He’s alive. But he’s got some really serious injuries. He tried to surf Jaws alone, and at night.”

  “What’s Jaws?”

  “It’s the most dangerous place to surf on the island. Just paddling through the explosive shore break is a feat in itself. Then riding the mountain of water that moves as fast as Jaws is usually reserved for the professionals, especially now while the swell is huge. Pali isn’t even near ready for something like that, and he might never be. I guess in his first major act of rebellion, that was where he had something to prove.”

  “Well, that was reckless,” Quinn said.

  “Yeah, exactly, but that’s what happens when you have a boy keeping everything bottled up, and that anger, humiliation, and testosterone raging through his veins finally erupt. But he’ll be okay. He’s resting now.”

  They began to walk up to the house.

  “So how did he get injured?” Quinn asked. “And how did he get out there?”

  “He hitched a ride with some older boys who were going out there to drink some beer and watch the waves. When they were ready to go, he borrowed a board, and they left him there, probably thinking he’d never have the guts to really try it. But he did. And according to him, he got dumped off while attempting a barrel.”

  “A what?”

  “Hard to explain, but it’s the most violent part of the wave where you have the least control. Think of it like a rag doll catapulting through the air. He’s damn lucky he was leashed, but during his spiral he injured his shoulder, broke his right leg, and dislocated his left kneecap. I’m surprised he didn’t amputate a finger with that leash too.”

  Quinn felt sick to her stomach. They approached the front porch and sat down on the top step. At first their knees were touching, but the sensation was so unsettling that Quinn moved over a few inches to put some space between them.

  “How was he rescued?” she asked.

  “That’s the miracle. He still had his board, but with his injuries he couldn’t get to shore. Jaime got word that Pali was missing, and he went to every beach, searching for hours. By the time he found him, Pali was clinging to the board hundreds of feet out.”

  Of all the people to find Pali, Quinn had to think it was divine intervention for his dad to be the one.

  “To beat all, Jaime can’t swim,” Liam said. “He’s probably the one man in our family who wasn’t obsessed with the ocean growing up. At least that I know of.”

  “Then how did he get him in?”

  “He had to learn real quickly.”

  Quinn felt goose bumps crawl up both arms.

  “It’s true,” Liam said. “He saw someone clinging to a board out there and knew in his gut that it was Pali. He said there wasn’t time to call for emergency services. He jumped in and floundered for a minute or two; then his reflexes kicked in, and it was either swim or drown. He made it out there and pulled Pali to the beach.”

  “That’s absolutely amazing,” Quinn said. “Where is he now?”

  “Jaime?” Liam nodded toward the house. “Inside. Probably trying to pry Alani off the back of his neck, where she’s been hanging like a monkey for the last half hour.”

  “How’s Maria taking his sudden return?”

  “They aren’t talking about it right now. Pali is their priority. He’s going to be incapacitated for a while.”

  Quinn felt ashamed that her next thought was that she’d never get them out of the house now. But it fell to the b
ottom of her pile of troubles when she remembered that she wanted to tell Liam about Carmen and Helen and the discovery about her identity.

  “I’ve got a lot to tell you, but do you think I should go inside and see Pali first?”

  “No,” Liam said. “He’s sleeping. Everyone else is about to head out. I don’t know if Jaime is staying or what. Let’s give them some time to talk. Want to go to the beach?”

  “That sounds good. Let me just pop in and tell Maggie.”

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Liam grabbed a beach towel off the line as they walked through the back courtyard to the beach path. Quinn followed, staying close to him since he knew the trail and it was dark.

  Five minutes before, she’d felt absolutely physically and emotionally exhausted, but now she felt a burst of energy. Since Maggie had arrived, she hadn’t seen much of Liam, and she had to admit she missed him.

  They settled close to a dune, adjusting the towel so they could recline and either look at the waves or the stars. At first they were quiet, and that was something she appreciated about him. He never wanted to miss the beautiful things. Sitting there with the breeze coming off the ocean and the moon shining down on them definitely qualified as a special moment.

  “So where do we start?” he finally said.

  “It’s probably going to be the craziest story you’ve ever heard.”

  “It’ll do you good to repeat it, then. Get it out of your system before it begins to poison you.”

  “I agree, but first, I’m dying to know about Jaime. Where’s he been? Why’d he leave?” Quinn knew it was none of her business, but she felt such a fondness for Maria that she just had to know. “Or did he tell you anything?”

  “He did. We had some time alone together after we got Pali situated. Remember I told you Jaime worked at the lumberyard for decades?”

  She nodded.

  “Well, it was sold last year when it started losing business to the big-box stores. First it was just Lowes, but when Home Depot came in, the lumberyard owners jumped ship and sold to a family that owns a lot of stuff on this island and could afford to bring it up to scale to compete.”