A Fresh Start

by Lexi Bissen

  “Don’t look all sad over there because your boy toy is gone. His uncle came and picked him up this morning. Apparently, Gibson had somewhere to be,” Allen says, breaking me out of my little funk.

  Damn him for knowing me so well. “There is no sadness and he is not my boy toy. I was just wondering if Gibson was still here. I would have felt bad if he had to walk all the way home.”

  Allen doesn’t bother hiding the smirk that says he knows I’m lying. “Mmhmm, sure. You were hoping he was here and don’t try denying it. I know you too well. His uncle was pretty upset that Gibson didn’t come home last night and was late for something this morning. Which, by the way, did you know his uncle is Officer Dan? I was pretty surprised about that one.”

  “I was, too. I didn’t even know Dan had any family. No one ever visits and he never travels anywhere to see anyone. All he does is work.” Mom has felt bad for him ever since he moved here. She’s always introducing him to the single women in town in hopes of setting him up and helping his hermit status.

  Allen looks at me like I’ve hurt his feelings. “You knew about their relationship and didn’t tell me? Ronnie Ethel Hamilton, I thought I was your best friend. You find out anything about anyone in this town, you tell me. I’m a gossip whore, you know this. I have to be in the know.”

  I reach over and smack Allen on the arm. “What have I told you about using my middle name? We don’t speak of that.” I hate that my parents named me after a great-grandmother I’ve never met. No one misses out on a chance to make fun of me for that one, especially Sean. “And it wasn’t like I didn’t tell you on purpose. I figured it out this week when I dropped him off one day. It must have slipped my mind.”

  Allen looks over at me laying on his legs. “Fine. I will forgive you…this time. You better not let it happen again though, missy. The moment you find anything you think is worth telling me, you text or call me ASAP. Got it?”

  I laugh at his ridiculousness. “Yes, sir, Mr. Gossip Whore. I will make sure to get back to you with every thrilling news about our upbeat town. You know, I do believe Mrs. Stephan’s was thinking about getting another goat to add to her farm.”

  “You know that is not what I am talking about,” he says, giving me a pointed look.

  I lay my head on the back of the couch, grateful the medicine is working and my headache is almost gone. “I know, and I will keep you in the loop from now on with future interesting information I find out.”

  Allen lays back on the couch so his head is next to mine and takes my hand in his, giving it a pat. “That is all I ask. Now, I think I waited long enough for you to give it up yourself, so now I’m going to ask. What was that I walked up on last night?”

  All traces of my hangover vanish and my body tenses. “What are you talking about?” I ask, even though I already know.

  Allen clicks his tongue. “That’s how you’re going to play it, huh? All right then, I see someone is a little ashamed they were caught lip-locking with the new boy. I may have been drunk, Itty-Bitty, but I definitely remember some fogged up windows and you rocking ‘just fucked’ hair.”

  “There was no fucking. We only kiss—” I slap my hand over my mouth before I even finish the word. That sneaky bastard.

  Allen is awake and bright eyed now, sitting there with a smug smile on his face. “I must say, I am really good. That was easier than I thought it was going to be.” He sits up and lifts his legs onto the couch so he’s facing me. “Now that that’s out of the way, you better not leave a single detail out. I want everything, and don’t forget to mention the lip ring.”

  I spend the next ten minutes telling him about the kiss and everything leading up to it, leaving out what Gibson told me about his past. I didn’t want to break his trust by telling Allen a story that isn’t mine to tell. Talking about the kiss has me remembering everything I felt during it. The way Gibson grabbed me with force, yet was soft when our lips touched. I’ve only kissed two other guys in my life. Alex, my middle school crush who Jerry beat up when he found out, and Rodger, but I never felt anything with either of them.

  It felt like more with Gibson, like I didn’t want to stop—couldn’t stop. I needed more, even now, just thinking about it. But he turned strange after our kiss. Maybe he doesn’t feel the same. Maybe it was along the lines of what I felt with Rodger and Alex: attraction. He has made no qualms over hiding the fact that he finds me good-looking. That’s probably all it was to him…either that, or I’m a bad kisser.

  “The strange thing was, after the kiss, Gibson was acting…indifferent. Maybe even a little angry. I thought it was a good kiss…well, until you showed up. I could have done without a drunk Allen involved.”

  Allen’s eyebrows pinch together and he tilts his head. “Why would he be angry about getting hot and heavy with a smoking chick? Any guy would be jumping up and down about some lip action with you.”

  Allen sits there and thinks about it for a minute. Hopefully he comes up with something, because my only guess is I suck at kissing. “I’ve got it. Maybe Gibby was hoping to get lucky and was angry about getting interrupted. The poor guy was probably fighting a hard-on.”

  I shake my head at his crazy thought. “There is no way he would have thought that. It was only an impromptu kiss that ended soon after it began.” I hope he wouldn’t assume something like that anyway. “The only reason I can think of is I’m a bad kisser.”

  Allen looks shocked. “I’m going to say no on that one. There is no chance you are a bad kisser. Look at those lips, they can practically do everything for you.” I pull my lips into my mouth to hide them from his statement. I have larger lips than some, but it doesn’t make me a fan of them. “I would say we could kiss and I can give you some critiques, but I think I’ve kissed enough women this weekend.” He shudders.

  “Speaking of kissing Anna, what was that about? The last person I would have expected you to kiss would be Anna. Sean would have been higher on that list.” He’s tried that before, but Sean wasn’t a fan of a drunk Allen trying to plant one on him.

  “Banana was feeling a little down about Sean cheating on her. It’s been a year and that little chica is still heartbroken. I thought I could cheer her up by making her feel wanted. I guess that didn’t work out so well.”

  I want to laugh at his idea of trying to make her feel better, but I’m sad for Anna. When Sean cheated on her at an away game last year, Anna was devastated. He crushed her with one photo and nothing he said could get Anna to forgive him.

  “I think Sean still is too, even though he’s the one who cheated. He loved Anna. Plus, he hasn’t dated since her. That has to show for something.” Sean has never admitted to anything, but I know he still loves her.

  Allen gets up from the couch and stands in front of me. “No more talk of the unspoken kiss and those ex-lovebirds. We have a movie and junk food day we must prepare for. Now, go upstairs and shower or do whatever you need to do so we can go to the store and stock up.”

  After we each shower and dress, we drive to Walmart and buy all the junk food we can think of. We don’t get movie days often, so we like to take advantage, even if it means extra time in the gym. Once we get back to Allen’s house, we lounge around watching Netflix until his mom comes home at nine. I head home after that, since I have to work the next day.

  It’s not until I get home that I realize I hadn’t thought about Gibson or the kiss most of the day, but now that I’m alone, it’s the only thing on my mind.

  It’s Monday morning and today is the day I plan on asking Ronnie out. It’s a first for me, so I’m nervous. What if she says no? I’ll look like an idiot. I made the decision after talking with Allen Sunday morning. To say he was happy I was planning on asking Ronnie out would be an understatement. The guy’s hangover was gone the moment I asked him for advice.

  I didn’t ride with Ronnie and Allen this morning and opted to catch a ride with Dan when he offered. I’m happy to not ride with them today, though. I know Allen would have m
ade it awkward with Ronnie and me around each other. He’s probably going to tip Ronnie off that something is going on.

  We’re all sitting together at our table in English, with Sean and Rodger both giving me death glares and Ronnie flipping through her No Fear Shakespeare book with Allen as they take notes. I wish our classes were already over. I don’t want to deal with Ronnie’s brother and his shit-for-brains friend. At least Sean has an excuse not to like me. If I had a little sister, I’d be acting the same way. No one with a dick would be allowed within thirty feet of her. Rodger, however, has no excuse not to like me. Sure, I want to fuck the chick he apparently has feelings for, but the guy needs to get the hell over it. The guy’s weird. He never stops staring and seems territorial over Ronnie.

  I’m flipping through what little notes I have when Allen calls my name. I look over to him and he gives me a devious smile. “Ronnie and I were thinking about getting together this weekend and studying for the test Monday. You want to join in? Unless you have plans or something...”

  I narrow my eyes at the little shit for playing games. “I have absolutely nothing going on. But didn’t you mention something about a doctor’s appointment for the strange thing you have growing on your foot? I wouldn’t wait to get that checked out, man.”

  His jaw drops as everyone at the table looks at him. Ronnie even shifts a little to the left, away from him and closer to me. Sean and Rodger both look at Allen like he has some kind of disease.

  “What the fuck is wrong with your foot? Doesn’t matter. Whatever it is, go get that taken care of. I don’t want to catch anything,” Sean says to him.

  Allen holds his hands up. “Hang on, I don’t have anything growing anywhere. I have no clue where he got that from. Look, I’ll even show you.” Allen reaches down to take off his shoe, but Ronnie stops him.

  “That really isn’t necessary, sweets. I’m sure a doctor will get rid of…whatever it is.” I lean my elbows on the table and place my hands in front of my face, covering my smile and trying to hold back the laugh that wants to escape.

  Before Allen can say anything else, the bell rings. Sean and Rodger make a quick escape. When I look over to Ronnie, she seems to be keeping her distance while getting her backpack. Allen glares at me, then runs a finger across his throat.

  Before Ronnie can get away from the table, Allen stops her, “Don’t believe him, Itty, he’s lying.”

  Ronnie stares at him, biting her lip and glances to everyone else at the table. “There’s nothing to be ashamed of, hun. Just get whatever it is checked out this weekend. We can study during the week at work.”

  “He only said that because he was going to ask you out,” Allen blurts, stilling Ronnie and me. Thank God no one else was in the classroom to hear that. I would have had to kick his ass.

  Ronnie stands there, staring at me with wide eyes. When I turn to Allen, he slaps his hand over his mouth. Ronnie looks down at him, and asks, “What are you talking about?”

  Allen shakes his head at her. “Nothing. It just slipped. It didn’t mean anything.” Like she’s that stupid.

  “You wouldn’t have said it if it didn’t mean anything. Now, what are you talking about Gibson was going to ask me out? He doesn’t even like me.” The fuck she just say?

  “What do you mean I don’t like you?” I ask her.

  When Ronnie turns to look at me, she keeps her head down and tries to avoid eye contact. “Well, after this weekend, I figured you weren’t interested.”

  Leaning forward, I catch the scent of Ronnie’s fruit shampoo. It wraps around me and I have to shake off the feelings it entices. I look into her eyes. After this weekend, I knew she would have thought I wasn’t interested, but I need to make her realize that wasn’t why I acted strange. “You talking about after our kiss?” I ask her.

  A little shade of pink runs across her cheeks. I love making this chick blush. It lets me know I affect her.

  “Yes,” Ronnie answers.

  I step closer to her, trapping her against the table. “You thought I was upset?”

  “More like angry,” she says, dropping her chin so she’s facing the ground. The only times I’ve seen Ronnie act shy is when I get close to her, like now. Shows a different side of the girl who walks around with confidence and shoots the shit with her best friend.

  I take my hand and lift her chin so she has no choice but to look at me. Staring into her blue eyes is distracting and when she starts biting that full lip of hers, I want nothing more than to pull it into my mouth. I need to focus. I’m doing things differently this time. Date first, kiss later…then hopefully a little more than kissing. “I wasn’t angry, Ronnie,” I whisper.

  She looks shocked and tries to pull her face out of my hand, but I don’t want to let go just yet. Instead, I move my hand to cup her cheek.

  “You weren’t? Then why were you acting so strange?”

  I move my head a little closer to hers, still cupping her cheek. “You want me to be honest or make up something that doesn’t sound so lame?”

  Ronnie laughs. “The truth, always the truth,” she says.

  I take a deep breath and move my hand from her cheek to the back of her neck. “I was a little scared.” Damn, that was hard to say.

  “Scared? What do you mean you were scared?” she asks.

  “I said a little scared, first off. Second, you scare me a bit. I’ve never had feelings for a chick before,” I tell her.

  Ronnie lifts her eyebrow. “Out of all the women you’ve been with, you never had feelings for any of them? I find that hard to believe.”

  If she only knew. “Trust me when I say this,” I lean in so our noses are almost touching, “I have never felt what I felt when we kissed with any other girl. You’re different, Ronnie. I like you—a lot.”

  Ronnie lets out a small gasp and that does me in. I grip her hair and lean in to put my mouth on hers. Just as our lips touch, Allen clears his throat. How could I have forgotten he was here?

  I release Ronnie’s hair and let my hand drop. She leans back to distance herself from me. I get the message and move back myself. Allen is still sitting in his seat with some kind of loving look in his eyes. It’s sort of freaking me out the way he’s looking between us.

  Before I realize what’s happening, Allen wraps his arms around Ronnie and me. I stand with my arms at my sides, wondering what is wrong with him. Dude whimpers, sounding like he’s trying not to cry next to me.

  He holds the two of us for an uncomfortable amount of time before saying, “I am so excited my besties are in love. You two just better not make me the third wheel when we’re together.”

  Ronnie and I both push Allen off us. “What in the hell are you talking about?” Ronnie asks. “The-there’s nothing going on here.” Way to bring a guy’s ego down. I thought there was a little something going on. You know, with me about to kiss her and everything.

  Allen wags his pointer finger at Ronnie. “Don’t you give me that crap. I know chemistry when I see it, little missy, and that right there was hot chemistry.”

  It would have been hotter if he weren’t here.

  When Ronnie doesn’t say anything to Allen, I grab her hand and pull her out of the classroom. Allen calls our names, but doesn’t follow. I want to get this over with and just…ask her. The hallway is pretty clear since the students are either at lunch or in their classes, so I pull her toward the bathrooms at the end of the hall where I can talk to her in private. Once we reach the women’s restroom, I open the door and pull Ronnie inside. The moment the door shuts, the bell rings. We’re both late for class, but I couldn’t care less.

  She still looks confused, and hell, even I am. Allen just messed up all the shit I had planned. Asking a chick out is harder than I thought it would be. Now that I’m alone with her, I have no clue what to say, which has never happened to me. I’m usually the life of the party, always the center of attention, but then, I was around people who looked at me like I was a person of importance. Ronnie doesn’t
see any of that. She doesn’t see the rock star’s son, the guy who can out chug a beer against anyone, or the guy who will take someone else’s car for a joyride. Ronnie just sees Gibson.

  I lock the door and turn around to find Ronnie standing there with her arms crossed over her chest. She’s glaring at me and I’m sure I won’t be a fan of what she has to say next. “What is wrong with you? You can’t just drag people around like that, you know. You’ve made me late for class now.”

  Of course, she’s be upset about missing class. I walk up to her and put my hands on her shoulders, hoping to ease some of her frustration. “I’m sorry you’ll be late to class. I just had to clear some stuff up.”

  Ronnie takes a deep breath. “Fine. I don’t like my next class anyway. What did you want to talk about?”

  Since she already has an idea, this should be easy. Like ripping off a Band-Aid. The only problem is I have no clue what to say to her. Should I just come out and ask her if she wants to have dinner with me this weekend? Would that work?

  I look into her blue eyes. “Are you okay? You look like you’re thinking too hard over there.”

  Fuck it. “You have plans this weekend?” I ask her.

  Ronnie jerks her head back and I drop my hands from her shoulders. “Well, I work Friday night. Other than that, I was just going to work on the essay.”

  “Go out with me,” I blurt, without thinking.

  Ronnie’s eyes get huge and she takes a step back. I would if I were her, too. I practically shouted at her. “I’m sorry. Let’s backtrack for a second. Will you go out with me this weekend? Saturday maybe?” I ask, a little less stressed this time.

  She raises an eyebrow and tilts her head. “You’re asking me out? Like…on a date?”

  Was I not straightforward enough? I lean forward so our faces are close, and enjoy Ronnie’s eyes as they widen slightly. “Yes. A date. Dinner or a movie. Something along those lines I’m guess—”