A Daring Journey

by Jeanne St. James

  “Hey,” she said softly.

  “Hey, you. Sorry. Everything good with you?”

  “Why wouldn’t it be?”

  Damon paused too long for Mac’s liking before saying, “Just with everything that happened this morning.”

  “You had a visitor.”

  “You know it wasn’t just a visitor.”

  Yes, she did. Trevor was much more than simply a visitor.

  “How did it go?” She kept her voice light and positive, even though she began to chew on her bottom lip.

  She liked Damon. She more than liked him. And having a man who he loved come back into his life, just when they were getting to know each other, was disappointing.

  But she wasn’t one to get in the middle of two people who loved each other.

  And it wasn’t like either she or Damon were invested in their relationship. It couldn’t even be considered a relationship. It was more of an attraction at this point.

  But still... She had really liked him. The sex had been great. And she did feel a connection with him. Stronger than she’d ever felt with anyone else in the past.

  They simply clicked.

  However, Trevor walking back into Damon’s life at this point was just rotten timing.

  “Does he want you back?” Mac had no claims on Damon, so she had to accept whatever he decided.

  “He’s been through a lot. Things I wasn’t aware of. But that’s not for me to tell, since that’s his personal business. But... He does want me to give him a second chance.”

  Oxygen rushed from Mac’s lungs and she pressed a hand to a tight muscle at the back of her neck, kneading it mindlessly. “I see.”

  “I’m glad someone does because I’m confused as fuck.”

  Mac leaned back in the office chair, still squeezing the area where her neck met her shoulder. “But you love him, right?”

  “I—”

  “Shouldn’t you give him a chance if you do?”

  “I don’t know, MacKenzie. I’m sorry... I...”

  Damon’s struggle tore at Mac’s heart. “You what?”

  “I’m very keen on not keeping things from people who mean something to me. I have a good reason. Because of that, I need to tell you something.”

  They slept together. After she left, Damon had sex with Trevor in the same bed as they had. In the same sheets, not even an hour after their intimacy.

  Mac closed her eyes and kneaded that tight muscle faster.

  “I... We...”

  “I can figure it out on my own, Damon. You don’t have to say it.”

  What sounded like a sigh came through the phone. “We didn’t have sex.”

  Relief flooded Mac, but only for a second until his next words.

  “But we did kiss.”

  “And?”

  “And... I... we... he... Fuck.”

  Out of all the conversations that they’d had, he never was at a loss for words like this. He was holding something back.

  “You were tempted to take it further.”

  “Yes.”

  “But you didn’t. Why?”

  Damon let out a harsh laugh. “Because it’s Trevor. And, more importantly, because of you.”

  Mac frowned into the phone. “Me? You don’t owe me anything, Damon. Not even an excuse. What we had was casual.” Had. Was.

  “It is?”

  “Wasn’t it?”

  “No. I didn’t consider it casual.”

  “Oh.”

  “You did?”

  “Well, apparently it was since you have feelings for someone else. Unless, by kissing him, you realized you made a mistake and it’ll never happen again.”

  “No. I can’t promise it won’t happen again.” Damon blew out a breath, then groaned into the phone. “Trevor and I have a lot of history. He’s been out of my life for five years.”

  “Apparently he’s not been out of your life if you accepted him back in.”

  “I’m not sure what will happen from here. If I accept him back, I have to give him a second chance that I’m not sure I want to give him.”

  “But he explained to you why he left. Was it a valid reason?”

  “I don’t know. It was a reason, but I think he could have stayed and dealt with it better than he did.”

  “Maybe you need to give the two of you a chance by reconnecting with him.”

  “But I don’t want to lose you.”

  Mac wasn’t sure what to say to that. Finally, she admitted, “I’m confused on what you want.”

  “You’re not the only one. Here’s my question to you: After last night, after the last week or so, in what direction did you see us taking?”

  Was he looking for a reason for them to break it off?

  “I’ve enjoyed spending time with you, whether in person or on the phone, Damon. That’s not even a question. Last night... this morning... I wanted more of that. I wanted more of you. So if you’re asking me if I would want us to continue, then yes, I’d want that.”

  “So do I.”

  “Then that settles it,” she said, hoping that was true.

  “I need to work out my issues with Trevor...”

  Him letting that hang made her stomach churn. “In bed.” It wasn’t a question, because she could see where he was heading.

  “Maybe, yes. In bed. Out of bed. In my head. In my heart.”

  “Then there’s no room for me. I don’t want to complicate things for you.”

  “That’s where you’re wrong. There is room for you—”

  “Wait. You want me to continue to see you, sleep with you, and just sit by and watch you ‘work out your issues’ with your ex-boyfriend? I’ve heard a lot of things, but that’s the first time I’ve heard that one.”

  “I know. It’s unconventional. And I’m asking a lot.”

  “To say the least.”

  “But I don’t want to toss away what we have.”

  “We don’t have anything, Damon. Maybe we were heading in that direction, but things took a wrong turn. I’m not saying that’s your fault, but...” She blew out a breath. “Once you ‘work out’ your issues with Trevor... then what? I’ve wasted time and experience heartache when you decide you and he are meant to be together? I don’t want to be a part of some lottery where maybe I’ll win, maybe I’ll lose. Why would I subject myself to that?”

  “You’re right. You shouldn’t. Can you just give me a little time?”

  “How much time and are you going to sleep with Trevor during that time?”

  “I won’t.”

  “What about me?”

  “What about you?”

  “Do you want me to sleep with you during this ‘time’ you need to figure things out?”

  Once again, there was quiet on the other end of the phone for longer than necessary. “I would like that, but only if you agree.”

  “But is that fair to Trevor?”

  “Trevor knows you are in my life.”

  “Barely.”

  “What?”

  “I’m only barely in your life. We’ve only begun to know each other.”

  “MacKenzie—”

  She cut him off. “I guess I should be glad this happened now instead of later when and if we established a relationship.” Now the tension in her shoulder was creeping up her neck. She needed to dig out a heating pad. “How about this, Damon? You let me think on it this weekend, while you do the same. Then we’ll speak sometime next week. We’ll see where we both stand and go from there.”

  “I have flights scheduled for most of the week starting tomorrow night.”

  “Your schedule hasn’t stopped us from talking before.”

  He didn’t respond for a long moment. “I’ll call you later.”

  Mac closed her eyes and bit back a groan. He was making this more difficult for her. “Why?”

  “Because I enjoy talking with you. I enjoy our conversations. Don’t you?”

  “Yes.”

  “Then I’ll speak with you later. W
e can keep the topic neutral. Not about Trevor or anything of that nature.”

  “Fine.”

  “I look forward to it, Mac.”

  Unfortunately, so did she.

  The phone went dead in her hand.

  The easiest and smartest thing for her to do would simply be to cut ties with him right now and go on with her life.

  She pulled up her photo gallery app and found the picture of him that he’d sent her. The one of him in his captain’s uniform. She brushed a finger over the screen as she studied it, thinking back on this morning and last night. She remembered how he looked naked, his dark skin glistening with a light sheen of perspiration as they had sex. That sex had been amazing, and she wasn’t sure if she wanted to give that up. Or give up on him.

  At least not yet.

  Chapter 11

  He knew he shouldn’t be doing this. It was wrong. But he couldn’t help it. He needed to know what Damon saw in her. He needed to get to know her. He wanted to know why Damon was struggling with his decision.

  Well, what Trevor had done was one reason, obviously. But they could’ve had sex earlier and maybe began to heal their relationship if this Mac wasn’t standing in the way.

  Even Damon had confessed this thing with MacKenzie was new.

  Maybe he’d discover that she was perfect for Damon and Trevor would end that decision for him. Who knew Damon better than him? Wouldn’t he be able to recognize if Mac was better for Damon than himself?

  He wasn’t lying when he said he wanted Damon to be happy. He did. Damon deserved it. And if Mac would make Damon happy...

  Then he’d walk away.

  He didn’t want to see Damon pulled in two different directions. Trevor had already caused him enough turmoil. He also didn’t want to hurt a woman who found herself in an unexpected situation not of her own doing.

  Damon would be pissed if he knew Trevor was at Mac’s front door, getting involved in something he shouldn’t.

  But he didn’t want Damon to regret any decision he made, whether it was deciding to give Trevor a second chance or telling him to get lost, that he was ready to continue his journey on getting to know Mac.

  Fuck. He shouldn’t have come here.

  However, it was too late since he’d already pressed the doorbell and heard footsteps from inside heading in his direction. He couldn’t ring and run like a kid.

  He found it difficult to swallow as he pinned his sweaty palms to his thighs in an attempt to hide the tremble. He blew out a breath only a second before the door swung open.

  They stared at each other for an uncomfortable moment, then Trevor let his gaze wander to the heating pad she held to her shoulder.

  “Are you all right?”

  His concern must have confused her, because her eyebrows knitted together. “Just a crick in my neck. Too many hours sitting at the computer, I guess.” She tilted her head, then winced. “But you didn’t come here to ask me that.”

  His fingers itched to ease her discomfort. “No.”

  “Why are you here, Trevor? To size up the competition?”

  “Is that what we are?”

  “I hope not.”

  “Truthfully, I hope not, either. I came for a few reasons—”

  She cut him off. “How did you know where I live?”

  Shit. While plugging his number into Damon’s phone earlier, he had taken note of Mac’s last name and did a Google search once he got home. Now he felt like a stalker.

  “I Googled your name.”

  Her brows rose up and her face paled. “And you found my address that easily?”

  “Yes. You weren’t hard to find with your unique name.”

  “Damn,” she murmured. “Good thing I don’t have enemies.”

  “Just me.” He raised a hand when her bright blue eyes went wide. “Just kidding. Sorry, that was in bad taste.”

  “Am I your enemy, Trevor? Am I a threat to you? Am I standing in the way of you having what you want?”

  Trevor took a couple deep breaths before saying, “No. While I love Damon, I only want what’s best for him.”

  “Such a pat answer.”

  “It is, but it’s true.” When she said nothing, he continued, “Damon likes you.”

  “He hardly knows me.”

  “I don’t mean to screw things up for the two of you.”

  “Don’t you?”

  Trevor let his gaze slide over Mac from the top of her red hair, past the heating pad this time, and over her slender curves tucked into a loose white tank top and an equally loose pair of black cotton shorts, all the way to her bare feet.

  “Now you’re sizing me up.”

  He raised his gaze and gave her a small smile. “I see why Damon is interested.”

  “Is he that shallow?”

  “No. And I’m sure you know that by now.”

  “Like I said, we hardly know each other.”

  “Enough to sleep together.”

  She pursed her lips for a few seconds before asking, “Are you judging me for that?”

  “Not at all. I’m hardly a prude, believe me.”

  “You’ve been out of his life for five years and you wanted to have sex with him this morning.”

  Damn. Had Damon tattled to Mac as soon as he’d left? “He talked to you.”

  “Yes. He told me he loves you.”

  Trevor’s heart skipped a beat just hearing those words. The fact that Damon would tell Mac that, a woman he was interested in, surprised him. “Just because he does, doesn’t mean he wants me back.”

  “But you want him to take you back.”

  “Can I come in?” He didn’t want to continue this conversation on her front stoop.

  “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

  “I just... I... I’m sorry. You’re right. This is a bad idea. I’ll go.”

  As Trevor turned to leave, Mac called out, “Wait. I can make us tea or coffee... or a stiff drink.”

  “A drink is something we both need after today,” he half-joked.

  “Yes.” She stepped back from the doorway and lifted her arm, inviting him in. “Please. There’s no reason for us to be enemies. Or even jealous of each other. We can be civil. I’ve never fought over a man before and I never plan to.”

  Trevor stared at her for a moment. She was genuine. Nothing fake or pretentious about her. Coupled with the girl-next-door looks, Trevor could see why Damon had an instant connection with her.

  When it came to women, he and Damon discovered they had the same taste. While they never shared a woman before, there had been many times when they’d been out in public together—at a restaurant or bar or even the mall—and they’d pointed out women or men who they found attractive. Not surprisingly, they gravitated toward the same types.

  It had become a little game with the two of them, seeing if they’d pick out the same person who they’d both choose to take home with them. If they had been into that.

  They’d never followed through on it, but it was fun to fantasize.

  The longer he stared at Mac, the more he saw what Damon did.

  Her question, “Are you coming in?” shook him from his thoughts.

  He followed her into the house and, after she shut the door, down the hallway of her two-story condo toward what looked like a kitchen.

  Her kitchen was small, but charming and from what he could see so far, her home was clean and organized. Something Damon would appreciate since he was the same way. Trevor tended to be on the sloppier side and Damon had always been after him to clean up and stop leaving things here and there around their apartment.

  She opened her fridge and peered inside. “I don’t have any beer...”

  “That’s fine since I don’t drink beer.”

  Her head rose above the open door. “Wine?”

  He shook it. “Truth is, I don’t drink.”

  Her mouth made an O.

  “It’s not that I can’t, I shouldn’t.”

  “Are you on medication?
” She winced. “No, don’t answer that. Ugh! I work in a field that I should know better than to ask a question like that.”

  “What do you do?”

  “I’m a medical fraud investigator. I work from home.” She pointed to the heating pad still on her shoulder. “Unfortunately, I sit in front of a computer too much in a horrible office chair that needs to be replaced. But the one I want costs a small fortune. I think I might have a pinched nerve or something.”

  “I can help with that.”

  Her brows raised, but she ignored his offer. “Iced tea, then?”

  “That would be great. Thanks.”

  “Do you mind if I have a glass of wine? I think I need it.”

  “No, please do. It might relieve some of the tension you’re holding in your shoulders.”

  “I am?”

  He gave her a knowing smile. “Yes.”

  “How do you know?”

  “I’m a massage therapist.”

  She made another O with her mouth. It was cute. Especially with the freckles that crossed her nose and were sprinkled over her cheeks. “That’s why you said you could help.”

  “Yes. I have no intentions on strangling you,” he teased then approached her after she closed the fridge. He pointed at the heating pad. “May I?”

  He watched as a conflicted look crossed her face. Without a word, she nodded. She put the iced tea pitcher down on the counter and Trevor gently pulled the heating pad off her shoulder, placing it on the counter as well.

  “I’m going to touch you,” he warned her softly.

  She nodded. “I figured you didn’t have X-ray vision.”

  A laugh slipped from him, but he quickly sobered as he pressed his hand to her shoulder and let his fingers move around the area. Trevor tried to ignore the goosebumps that broke out over her fair skin. “A knot. Just what I figured. And you’re holding a lot of tension in your shoulders as I suspected. Is the pain in your neck, too?”

  “Yes,” she whispered.

  “Since you sit a lot, do you go to a chiropractor?”

  “Occasionally.”

  “You should do it regularly.” He ran his fingers up her neck, lightly probing. She shivered and sucked in a breath. “I can work that knot out, if you’d like. I have my massage table in the car.”

  “You carry it around with you?”

  “Yes, I do home visits since I don’t have an office yet.”