Friends Who Lie

by Paul J. Teague

  ‘I’d like to dedicate this first song sung in Erin’s Bar to a very special lady in the audience. This is “Babylon” by David Gray!’

  There was another cheer from the audience, bigger and much more enthusiastic now.

  ‘Yes,’ Gina said, after taking a sip of her wine and looking earnestly at her new friends. ‘He knows exactly what he’s doing.’

  Chapter Fifteen

  Kasey and Harriet: May

  ‘You look like you got lucky last night!’ Kasey smiled as he stood up to hug Harriet.

  ‘Well done on getting a table at this time of day,’ she replied, avoiding the subject.

  ‘Don’t try and hide it from me. I can tell. You Brits are so stuck up most of the time, you can spot when you got laid a mile off!’

  ‘I’d rather not talk about it,’ Harriet said. ‘Besides, I was hoping to have a chinwag about Caitlen’s bombshell.’

  Harriet’s Americano arrived, along with a square of brownie.

  ‘I ordered for you when you texted to say you were on your way, perfect timing! I take it you’re still leading with Americano?’

  ‘The irony of this set-up isn’t lost on me, you know. There’s you, an American, with a pot of tea and a scone, and here I am, a true Brit, with my Americano and brownie. We’re never happy with what we’ve got, are we?’

  ‘You’re in a pensive mood,’ Kasey said, pouring his tea. ‘What caused this? Bad date?’

  ‘I’m not telling you who it was. I’d rather hear your thoughts on Caitlen’s news. Do you think that’ll be the end of our little group? It’s been strained enough recently.’

  Kasey folded down the lid of his laptop, placed the device in his bag and moved the items on the table around to create some more space.

  ‘I can’t say I’m not jealous,’ he said after a while. ‘Who couldn’t use a windfall like that at our stage in life? But you can’t knock her for it, it’s a wonderful surprise.’

  ‘I think she’ll leave Terry,’ Harriet picked up, as if desperate to share her take on events. ‘Did you see the way she was looking at him during the meal? I think he’ll be history soon. He’s a nice guy, but he doesn’t really fit in, does he? I never really understood why they ended up together.’

  She bit into her brownie.

  ‘Ah, chocolate, all I need to drown away a dull morning at work!’

  ‘I find Terry’s gay references a bit tiresome. It’s like, get over it, Terry, I’m into men. I don’t get excited about him being heterosexual every five minutes. I know he doesn’t mean any harm by it ... but, you know, it stops me warming to the guy. He keeps putting this thing between us. I wish he’d just forget the gay thing and talk to me as a mate. I should say something ... but I don’t. I can’t.’

  Harriet sipped on her Americano.

  ‘There it is, just the midday kick a girl needs. How long have you been working in here?’

  ‘I got in just after nine. They’re happy to let me sit and work as long as I buy drinks every so often. It’s the joys of not having a boss. You get to sit in Starbucks all day and spend your evenings running backwards and forwards to the restroom because you drank so much tea.’

  ‘Are you going to Spain? It’s a lovely treat for us all, I thought that was really generous.’

  ‘Of course I am! I wouldn’t miss a free trip to Benidorm. I’ve never been before.’

  ‘What?’ Harriet asked. Kasey’s face had changed.

  ‘Nothing. You have a secret, I have a secret. We’re allowed secrets from each other, right?’

  ‘Yes, of course. If you tell me yours, I’ll tell you mine. How do you work in these places by the way, I couldn’t concentrate with all this noise?’

  ‘This is my office darling. Besides, it’s only packed like this at lunchtimes when you office drones file out for your lunch. It’s you lot who make all the noise.’

  ‘Ha, you’re probably right about that, we’re all desperate for our freedom. So, what’s your secret?’

  ‘Promise you’ll tell me yours, Harry?’

  ‘Yes, but it had better be a good one, because you’ve got to keep quiet about mine. Besides, I’m dying to share. But you have to promise to keep it to yourself!’

  ‘You’re like the sister I never had Harriet, I’d trust you with my life. I’ll go first. I have to tell somebody, it’s pushed my blood pressure through the roof.’

  Kasey had that look on his face again. Most of the time he seemed relaxed and approachable. Recently, Harriet had noticed a furrowed brow on more than one occasion.

  ‘Go on then, you show me yours first.’

  ‘You have to promise not to tell. This is serious, Harry. It’s not gossip. I need your advice.’

  ‘Promise,’ Harriet replied, forgoing a second bite of her brownie because Kasey now had her undivided attention.

  ‘You know I was moaning about Terry earlier? Well, it’s worse than that. The gay thing, I mean. He just uses that to tease me. Did you know he’s bent?’

  ‘What, gay? Or like a bent copper?’

  ‘A bent copper, you of all people should know I wouldn’t use that word!’

  ‘That’s what I thought. How is he bent?’

  ‘You have to promise not to say anything, Harry.’

  ‘I told you, I promise.’

  ‘I’m not supposed to be in the UK. I came over here to study and never went back.’

  Harriet sat there and just looked at her friend. She’d never even thought about it. She’d known Kasey for several years and knew that he’d been a student. But she had no knowledge about visas or any of the technicalities.

  ‘How can you even do that?’

  ‘Well, I’m not proud of it, but it turned out to be quite easy. It’s why I stay in that damned flat though. The identity checks are so strict these days, I daren’t risk a move. Or it might be game over.’

  ‘So how do you do anything? Banks and travel and stuff like that?’

  ‘That’s how I got in too deep.’

  ‘Christ, Kasey, I can’t believe you’re telling me this! My little secret is nothing compared to this. Can they deport you?’

  ‘I have forged documents. It was the most stupid thing I ever did. My name isn’t Kasey, it’s David. Davy when I lived in the US. It’s why I work online, I keep my money in PayPal, you can work around most things.’

  The brownie was now unlikely to get eaten.

  ‘Say something,’ Kasey said, ‘I need to know you don’t hate me.’

  ‘I don’t hate you, I’m just worried about what might happen to you. Does anybody need to know? There’s not a problem until you get caught is there?’

  ‘That’s why my blood pressure is so high. Terry knows. And he’s holding it over me.’

  ‘How the fuck does Terry know? What business is it of his?’

  ‘Well, it turns out that he uses that police computer of his to check us all out. He says they all do it. And he realised that Kasey Gaimer suddenly appeared from nowhere. I think that he found a loose thread and couldn’t stop unravelling it.’

  ‘What did he say? Is he going to report you?’

  ‘Worse. He’s blackmailing me.’

  ‘You’re kidding me Kasey! How’s he doing that? That’s illegal, isn’t it?’

  ‘Well, I’m an illegal alien, so that makes us even. I don’t know what to do, Harry. If I keep paying up, I can stay in the UK. I can afford it, he’s not bleeding me dry.’

  ‘Have you paid him anything yet? How long has this been going on?’

  ‘No, first payment is due just before we go to Spain. I’m hoping Cait’s money will make the problem go away. Hopefully, he won’t need the cash now.’

  ‘Does Caitlen know about this? She’d be furious with him.’

  ‘He told me if I shared it with anybody, he’d have me sent back to the States. And he said it’ll never come back to him, because he’d fake a report from one of my neighbours, so he would never be implicated. Imagine the shame of it, Harry. I don’t ev
en know what I’d do in the USA now, I’ve been gone years. I feel like a Brit now. I don’t want to go.’

  ‘I can’t believe you’re telling me this, Kasey.’

  She took his hand and gave it a squeeze.

  ‘We should have it out with him in Spain. There’ll be plenty of time to split off into groups when we’re out there. We should tell him that I know what he’s doing and that if he tries to blackmail you, we’ll snitch on him. If one of you falls you both fall. Mutually assured destruction. How much money does he want?’

  ‘That’s the thing. It’s not that much. He called it a contractual arrangement. He makes sure I stay in the UK, in exchange for which I contract his services. He wants £200 a month. I can pay that, my shitty flat is so cheap. I’m thinking about it. It’s worth it.’

  ‘Kasey, he’s supposed to be your friend! He’s supposed to be a friend to all of us. You can’t let him behave like that!’

  ‘When Caitlen told us about her money, I thought, thank God, Terry won’t need my cash anymore. But he’s not said anything to me yet. And I don’t want to bring it up. To be honest with you, I’ve just been burying my head in the sand.’

  ‘We have to tackle this, Kasey. He’s just being a bully. He knows that you’ll do anything to stay in the UK and he’s pitched his blackmail money at a level that you’ll be happy to pay forever. It’s perfect for him. He knows you won’t tell, because you’ll get sent back to the States if you do. But he’s breaking the law, Kasey. He shouldn’t have been snooping on you in the first place and he certainly shouldn’t be blackmailing you. Promise me, we’ll talk to him about it in Spain? We’ll let him know that I know. That way he’ll be forced to keep your secret and nobody ever needs to know what you did. But promise me Kasey, if we manage to sort out Terry, you have to work with me to try and get your situation resolved. We have people connected to the council who can help, you can contact them in confidence and see what your options are. You’ve got to dig yourself out of this lie. You’re from the USA, we like you guys a lot, it can’t be that difficult to sort out. Imagine what our attitude would be like if you came from Europe!’

  Kasey didn’t look like he was convinced, he needed time to think it through.

  ‘Anyway, what’s your secret? You promised you’d trade. It had better be good after what I just told you.’

  ‘You promise me that you’ll let me come with you to talk to Terry? Promise me that at least.’

  ‘I promise. Now come on, tell me your secret.’

  ‘Okay, but you can’t tell anybody, okay? It could cause a shitstorm.’

  ‘Promise. What’s so secret?’

  ‘I’m still in love with Matt. He still loves me, he doesn’t want to marry Becky. And we’ve been sleeping together again’

  Kasey looked at her and smiled.

  ‘You’ll have to do better than that for a secret, Harry. I knew it was Matt you’d slept with the moment you walked through that door. He’s the only person who can put that smile back on your face.’

  Chapter Sixteen

  Benidorm: June

  ‘Anybody up for karaoke?’ Gina suggested. ‘There’s a bar up the road that does it. Very British, it’ll suit Terry when the others re-join us.’

  ‘What’s it called?’ Caitlen replied, ‘I’ll text Rhett, he looked like he was still capable of answering his phone.’

  ‘It’s Curly’s Tavern. All the Brits know it, they’ll find it easily enough.’

  The moment Wes had started to play Harriet’s song on the stage, they’d decided to move on. Maybe he was being friendly, maybe not. He hadn’t asked any of the men about their favourite song.

  ‘Will Kasey get back from the hospital tonight or is he stuck with Porter?’

  Harriet checked her phone for messages, but there was nothing.

  ‘Emmy’s going to be in the dog house,’ Naomi said, ‘She just abandoned Porter. I reckon they’ll be having words about that when Porter gets back. Once Emmy has sobered up, of course!’

  ‘I’m not sure if I’ve ever seen her like that before,’ Harriet replied. ‘She likes her drink, but she’s really letting her hair down. Terry doesn’t help, they seem to bring out the worst in each other.’

  Caitlen said nothing, but quietly clocked the comment. Her phone vibrated. She noticed that she was still set on UK time. She resolved to get a newer phone with her new cash, she’d thought it was supposed to adjust to Spanish time automatically.

  ‘At least Rhett is reliable Naomi, they’ll meet up with us there. Apparently Emmy and Terry have overstayed their welcome at the heavy metal bar, they’re both doing some pole dancing on the podiums at the moment. Can you imagine Terry pole dancing? I hope it’s anchored into the ground properly, the whole building will come down!’

  They exited Erin’s Bar with Wes still strumming away on the stage. Gina guided them along the street. There were raucous sounds coming from all directions, with couples, groups and individuals in various states of inebriation walking up and down the road.

  ‘You should try the Old Town tomorrow,’ Gina laughed ‘It’s a bit more sedate if you like things that way. This is crazy Benidorm ... it’s fun though.’

  Curly’s Tavern was in full swing. There didn’t appear to be a time when Benidorm wasn’t in full swing.

  ‘Kasey just texted me,’ Harriet announced, just as a tsunami of amplified music and beer odours washed over them. ‘He’s heading for the Old Town to find a gay bar, he’ll meet us back at the apartments. He’s dropped Porter off at the apartments, they’ve patched him up. Nothing too serious, just some superficial burns. He’ll recover, apparently.’

  The music track ended, giving them sufficient respite to get some drinks at the bar. Reluctantly Caitlen lined up another three bitters for Terry, Emmy and Rhett. There would be some bad heads the next day, they were all old enough to know better.

  ‘Ladies and gentlemen, it’s karaoke time!’

  There was a big cheer in the bar.

  ‘Told you,’ Gina said, ‘This is fun. Have you ever done karaoke ladies?’

  Naomi, Caitlen, Harriet and Becky looked at each other.

  ‘Never!’ they all agreed.

  ‘You haven’t lived,’ Gina smiled. ‘How about we do a Spice Girls number just to warm you up? There are five of us. “Wannabe”?’

  ‘You’ll have to remind me about the zig-a-zig line, it’s been a while!’ Naomi laughed.

  ‘They put the words on the screen. All we have to do is to decide which Spice Girl we’re going to be.’

  There was lots of laughter and, for the first time since they’d been in Spain, Caitlen began to get a feel of the fun they might have out there. This was why she’d invited everybody out for the trip. And Gina was proving to be an excellent guide.

  As an old guy got up onto the stage and began singing, Gina wrote their names on the list.

  ‘We’re in between Neil Diamond and Britney Spears,’ she laughed when she got back to the main group. ‘Sounds like the one-night stand from hell!’

  They’d divided out their Spice Girl names. It wasn’t lost on Matt that Becky had ended up with Scary Spice. Harriet got Baby Spice, Gina was Sporty Spice, Caitlen was Posh Spice by virtue of her newfound cash windfall and Naomi got Ginger Spice. As it turned out, things couldn’t have been divided up more fairly, Naomi was even able to oblige on hair colour.

  ‘I’m auburn, not ginger!’ she protested.

  ‘Yeah, but there isn’t an Auburn Spice,’ Caitlen had teased.

  There was much amusement about the roles and the laughter grew to fever pitch as they shared their embarrassing Spice Girls memories.

  Terry walked into the bar with Emmy and Rhett just as the Neil Diamond sound-a-like stepped up onto the stage to start performing ‘Love on the Rocks’.

  ‘Jesus, Emmy, you look pissed!’ Caitlen said, concerned about the amount of alcohol her friend had consumed. ‘Not everybody has a beer gut to store it in Terry, take it easy with her, okay?’
/>   ‘I’m fine,’ Emmy reassured them, her speech slurred but still intelligible. ‘I’ll have a couple of soft drinks now, I’ll be okay in no time.’

  ‘That leaves a spare pint for me!’ Terry said, downing one of the bitters that Caitlen had bought. She didn’t know where he put it.

  ‘Rubbish!’ Terry shouted at the man on stage. ‘Get him off!’

  ‘Keep your voice down, Terry!’ Matt urged. ‘You’ll cause a riot.’

  There had been some backward glances from the crowd, it was clearly not the done thing to berate the acts, even if they were tone-deaf.

  ‘Neil Diamond should sue this guy,’ Terry said, a little quieter this time around. ‘It sounds like he just sat on a cat.’

  ‘Hey mate, keep it down!’

  A guy twice Terry’s size and with sleeve tattoos running up and down his muscular arms looked annoyed.

  ‘Terry, best keep it down eh, we don’t want any trouble.’

  It was Rhett who was appealing to him now. Rhett knew that Terry had dealt with his fair share of arseholes during his time in the police. The guy’s size was unlikely to deter Terry if it came to that. But Rhett was not so pissed that he couldn’t see who was to blame. Terry needed to pipe down.

  Although the rendition of Neil Diamond’s hit was unlikely to be a chart-topper, its melodic nature did, at least, permit a few minutes of conversation without having to shout over the noise from the PA system.

  Caitlen was drawn by Matt’s gaze. Becky seemed to have perked up. Being a part of the group that was going to have a go at karaoke had lifted her spirits and she was happily laughing with Naomi. Matt was pleased for the break. But he was now watching some guy chatting up Harriet at the bar. He could feel the rage and frustration rising in him as the man gave her his patter and she laughed out loud at his jokes. Caitlen hadn’t clocked that before. Was Matt still in love with Harry? That could make life difficult.

  It was all over soon enough as the Neil Diamond song came to an end and the DJ announced that it was the turn of the ‘Old Spice Girls’ to perform ‘Wannabe’. A polite clapping turned into an enthusiastic welcome as the inebriated audience realised that they were being treated to the sight of five, non-pensioner women who, by and large, were in pretty good shape. They were certainly enough to give Neil Diamond look-a-like, seventy-year-old Len Davies from Leeds, a run for his money.