by M. Garzon
“Hello.” An accented voice broke into my reverie. “I’ve seen you often caring for your horse this week. Is this a habit of yours?”
I looked over to see a man leaning on the fence next to me. He looked distinguished, with silver hair and neat clothes that seemed rather dressy for a horse show. I felt a familiar crimp of embarrassment, remembering rich girls who had laughed at me when I couldn’t afford a groom. Things are different now, I reminded myself, and gave this stranger the benefit of the doubt.
“No, Hades is special. Sometimes I groom him myself to read his mood. I can tell by the way he acts toward me whether he approves of what we’ve done that day,” I explained.
The man nodded thoughtfully. “You seem to be always here, watching the other riders,” he commented.
I shrugged. “They’re some of the best in the world. I want to learn from them while I can.”
He smiled at me. “That’s quite wise for a girl your age. If you are ever in The Netherlands, come and see me.” He handed me a card and strolled away, whistling.
I looked at the card. It had a name, address and foreign telephone number on it, and I pocketed it without further thought.
“What did Bert want?” Karen asked when I got back to the tackroom. “The grey-haired gentleman,” she specified at my confused look.
“Nothing, he was just making conversation.”
Karen grinned. “Do you know who he is?” Her smile widened when I shook my head. “He’s the chef d’équipe for the Dutch national team. And he’s known for having an eye for talent.”
Jaden called right after I’d ridden Hades that afternoon. “What happened to your voice?”
I was hoarse from speaking over the music the night before. “I guess I overused it a bit,” I said vaguely.
“How’s your head?”
I hesitated, confused. “Fine, why wouldn’t it be?”
“Hangovers are peculiar that way.”
I sat on a trunk to unzip my half-chaps. “How...”
“I have my sources.”
“Karen told you.” I said flatly. I felt a prickle of irritation toward my mentor.
“Don’t be angry with her, she’s concerned. She thought you’d listen to me, although why she would think so is a mystery.”
I finished pulling off my chaps and folded them on the trunk. ““I’m not doing anything you haven’t done at polo tournaments — in fact, I’m way less wild than you were.”
“There’s a difference, Téa. You’re a small, attractive girl; you’re a lot more vulnerable than I was. Going to parties and getting drunk constitutes a greater risk for you. I’m not asking you not to celebrate, but please, be careful. For me.” He was using his most compelling voice, and it was plenty compelling. When he pulled out all the stops like that, there was no way for me to refuse him. I think he knew it, too.
“I promise to be careful,” I said dutifully.
“I can’t believe it’s come to this, but take Alex with you if you have to.” I was so shocked by his suggestion that I didn’t even mention that I doubted Alex would go anywhere with me.
Later that day Sorrel, to no one’s surprise, won her first class at the Master’s.
“Tonight, we celebrate my win.” She grinned at me as she rode out of the ring. Well, it wasn’t as though I had promised not to go out, I reasoned. Just that I’d be careful. And I would be.
I was quickly running out of clothes to wear to places other than the barn. My light blue summer dress would have to do, I decided, paired with a black wrap, the only one I’d brought. The dress was on the short side, but the bar we went to that night wasn’t as fancy as the previous night’s so I didn’t feel out of place. I had one alcoholic drink and after that, I stuck to juice.
The music was loud, and we danced a lot, mostly as a group but pairing off occasionally. I was getting tired when Sorrel and I headed to the bar to refresh our drinks, but loud cheering caught our attention before we ordered. A circle of people were standing around a man who, as I watched, bent backward over the bar. The bartender poured a shot directly into his mouth, and then — I could hardly believe my eyes — someone lit it on fire. Blue flames shot up before the man closed his mouth and straightened with a flourish, his arms raised for the applause that followed. I saw that it was Miguel, one of the Portuguese riders I’d befriended.
“Miguel, you have hidden talents,” Sorrel said admiringly. Miguel grinned and turned his large, soft brown eyes on me.
“It is easy. Would you like to try?” he offered.
“Oh, I don’t know...” I said.
“It does not hurt,” he assured me.
“I’ll go first,” Sorrel offered. Our new entourage cheered as she leaned back over the bar and opened her mouth for the shot. Miguel himself touched a match to the liquid, and with a gasp I watched the blue flames flare. It seemed more shocking now that it was Sorrel doing it.
“Now, close your mouth quickly,” Miguel instructed. She did, then straightened up, grinning madly.
“That was awesome!” Sorrel exclaimed. She grabbed my arm. “Téa, you have to try it!”
I hesitated, but I didn’t want to be a spoilsport, and I especially didn’t want to set myself apart from this crowd. I was gratified at how easily I’d been accepted and I wasn’t going to risk marring things.
I bent backward over the bar. From above my head the blond bartender plied her bottle.
“Ready?” Miguel appeared at the corner of my eye with a match. And just like that, blue flames filled my vision. I closed my mouth, wincing in expectation of heat, but I felt nothing but relief as I gulped down the alcohol, gasping at its potency.
Another cheer went up, and multiple hands patted me on the back. I looked up to find Jo watching with interest.
“How did you do that?” he asked. We explained, but it was easier to show him, so I demonstrated again. Then Sorrel went, then Jo tried, then it was my turn again... until, suddenly, the room spun. Miguel caught me as I swayed.
“This one needs to go home,” he remarked.
I’d arrived with Sorrel, who wasn’t ready to leave yet, and I needed to go. Not only was the room spinning but I felt decidedly sick. Without quite knowing how it happened I found myself being led outside by Jo. The cold night air felt good on my sweaty face, but my head didn’t get much clearer. I groaned.
“Come, you will go to bed and you will feel better,” Jo promised.
He had to pull over once so that I could throw up, to my intense embarrassment. After that, I felt marginally better, although I staggered as we entered the motel. Jo put an arm around me to steady me.
“My coach is going to kill me,” I whimpered as we got in the elevator.
“Then you will stay in my room,” he said, pulling me against his body.
Twelve
Morning came all too soon, and with it too much brightness, too much fury from Karen, and not enough coffee. Karen made some in the little coffee maker in our room while I got changed.
Her phone rang as I took another grateful sip of coffee. I could hear the angry buzz even before she held it away from her ear, and I tensed in apprehension. Karen held out the phone, her face pale. I took it reluctantly.
“Hi, Dec,” I said with false cheerfulness.
Even though he was across the country, I winced repeatedly during the tirade he unleashed on me. Years of conditioning caused me to cower at that booming voice, but after a minute I made myself straighten mentally. I briefly considered reminding him that I was nineteen and legally entitled to drink anywhere in the country, but luckily thought better of it. I did want to go home eventually, after all.
My own cell rang shortly after I’d hung up with Dec.
“Ouch.” The smile in Jaden’s voice came through clearly despite the miles.
“Don’t tell me you didn’t enjoy that a little.” I sighed.
“Querida, you know I could never enjoy your pain. But I do feel, in this one instance, it may be deserved.”
“I know,” I said quietly. “I was stupid. I got carried away.” I shuddered to think what might have happened if someone less honorable than Jo had taken me home, and realized with panic that Jaden could never know how close I’d come to danger. I fuzzily recalled my reaction when Jo had offered to take me to his room.
I had stared at him, aghast. “No! I mean, thanks, but...”
He had laughed. “Just to sleep, I promise. You are so small, I would break you if we did more.”
I tried to shake my head and immediately regretted it. “I have a boyfriend.”
He hadn’t seemed put out, and gallantly walked me to my door and helped me open it since I couldn’t seem to get the card into the slot.
I came back to the present. “Who told Dec?” I spoke into the phone, but my eyes went to Karen. She shrugged.
“Don’t you know?” Jaden sounded surprised.
“No.” A throbbing pain was burgeoning behind my eyes.
“There’s a picture of you leaning backward — in a very short dress, I might add — while a man pours alcohol straight from a bottle into your mouth.” His voice was grim. “It’s making the rounds online. There have been several comments about the show circuit’s new party girl. You.”
I was shocked into silence. Embarrassment that my family had seen the image, shame that I’d failed Jaden, and the vestiges of nausea combined to make me feel atrocious.
“Still there?” Jaden asked after a moment.
I swallowed back bile. “I... I’m sorry.”
He let out a long breath. “Look, I’ve been there. You don’t want to be the lone abstainer, and it’s a heady feeling to be accepted into a group you admire. Combine that with legitimate reasons to celebrate and it’s hard to resist.”
Tears stung my eyes. Jaden being so understanding made me feel both better and, though it hardly seemed possible, worse.
“Yes,” I sniffled.
“So learn from this experience. Even better, learn from Karen’s experience.”
“I can’t believe there’s a picture. I feel like I have no privacy anymore.”
“It’s only going to get worse as your reputation grows,” Jaden warned. “Let’s face it, Téa, it’s not only your talent that’s smoking hot. The press is naturally going to love you... and it doesn’t hurt that you’re giving them plenty of fodder, either. You need to stop this before it gets out of hand. Or do I have to fly out there to get my point across?”
“Why, is there a chance you could?” I exclaimed, instantly excited.
He chuckled. “That was meant as something of a threat, actually.”
“Oh. Well, I promise to act suitably chastened when you get here. But please try to come. I miss you so much.”
“I miss you too, baby.”
I was surprised; it was an endearment he rarely used.
We stopped at a restaurant on our way to the show, where I sat and watched Karen eat breakfast while I drank more coffee.
“Did Dec put the fear of God into you?” she asked between bites. It was the fear of Dec, more like, but I nodded.
She slammed her hand on the table, making me jump and drop my cup, which luckily didn’t spill.
“Well, you don’t look scared enough! Do you know how many talented riders have ended their careers with the kinds of stupid stunts you’ve been pulling?”
I twisted my napkin, not meeting her gaze. Karen’s own career had been severely limited by her drinking, and I realized with a sudden, sick shock that she might have been sitting right where I was at one time, listening to lectures and feeling irritated with people for overreacting.
I dropped the napkin and looked directly into her worried brown eyes. “I know, Karen. I’ll be much more careful in the future. Really.”
Hades didn’t have a class that day, and I waited until late in the day to ride him, giving my headache time to subside. My phone beeped as I was riding back to the barn.
Look behind you.
Confused, I glanced over my shoulder. Then I spun Hades around and pushed him into a gallop. He had barely stopped before I threw myself down and into Jaden’s arms.
“I can’t believe you’re here,” I gasped when he finally let me go. Hades had backed up to the end of his reins as though distancing himself from our display. Jaden chuckled and patted him as we walked to the barn arm in arm.
I gave him a tour, introducing him proudly to everyone we met. Karen seemed relieved to see him.
“Um, I’m pretty tired,” I told her. “I don’t think I’ll stay for the evening classes tonight.”
She gave me a knowing smile. “Well, I’ll be here for hours yet.”
Jaden had rented a car, and we were at the motel room in minutes. I dropped my bag on the bed before facing him.
“Shall we get the unpleasantness over with first?” he asked, his face serious.
“What unpleasantness?”
“Have you forgotten the small matter of your excessive partying? Staying out until all hours worrying Karen to death? And my personal favorite, strange men pouring shots into your mouth?” he demanded.
I sighed and looked up at him. “If I say sorry and promise not to do it again, will the unpleasant part be over? ’Cause I haven’t seen you naked in a really long time, and I’d like to get to that part as soon as possible.” I ran my hands over his chest as I was talking; he caught my wrists. A smile was fighting to break through, but he controlled it.
“Are you trying to distract me from your punishment?” he asked with mock severity.
“Yes.”
“It’s working.” The smile finally broke free, and I felt myself go weak in response. I never had been able to resist his smile. He pulled my wrists behind his back, drawing me against him, and my stomach quivered as his lips found mine.
The kiss stretched into timelessness. His hands moved leisurely over my body, and I hardly noticed how I found myself undressed and in bed. Our reunion was sweet, and after it I lay with my face tucked into the juncture of his neck and shoulder, breathing in his scent. I drew one leg over his body.
“I was afraid you’d be angrier,” I confessed.
“It’s not me you should worry about. Dec wanted me to read you the riot act when I got here. If you don’t calm down, he’s going to haul your little butt right back home.”
I nodded against his skin and rested my palm on his chest.
Jaden stroked my hair silently for a moment. “There was another picture, Téa.” His voice was strained. “A tall blond man had his arm around you, and you were... pressed against him.”
I rolled away from him, my heart thumping. That someone had taken a picture of me with Jo at a time when I’d been so vulnerable made me angry. And scared.
“He brought me home when I was drunk,” I admitted. I met his eyes directly, feeling an urgent need to convince him. “He was a perfect gentleman. I... needed help walking.” Shame caused my face to flame, and I turned it into the pillow.
His quiet breaths sounded for a few minutes. “Okay,” he murmured finally.
I raised myself onto an elbow. “Jaden, I’m so crazy about you, sometimes I feel like you should know how impossible it would be for me to look at another man. But maybe that’s not a fair or reasonable assumption for me to make.” I placed my hand on his cheek and looked him in the eye. “Just so we’re clear — I adore you, Jaden Foster, and regardless of my sometimes inconsiderate and thoughtless antics, you have nothing to worry about. You’re the only man that exists for me. I hope you know that.”
He pulled me on top of him, then held my face in his hands and kissed me so thoroughly that we were soon rolling around the bed again. After the week I’d had, I was really going to be sore everywhere.
We had to be at the showgrounds early the next morning, but I left the bed reluctantly. I wanted to stay lost, submerged in the warm rich honey of Jaden’s love. Despite everything that had happened, I felt a deep sense of contentment. When we were together, shelter was his arms
around me and sustenance came from whispers passed in the dark. I was more at peace than I had been in weeks.
We walked to the barn hand in hand. My hair, still wet from the shower, was covered by my favorite light blue cap and I shivered as the occasional droplet rolled down my back. Sorrel came ambling down the path toward us, accompanied by two other American riders and Alex.
“Hey.” Sorrel stopped and smiled at Jaden before sliding her eyes over to me. “I was wondering where you were last night.” Her smile turned sly.
“Sorrel, this is my boyfriend Jaden,” I introduced them.
They were shaking hands when Alex spoke. “Your cousin, you mean.”
Sorrel gave me a brows-raised look, but I was staring at Alex. The scorn in his voice hurt, and I couldn’t believe he was being so spiteful.
“Step-cousin,” I specified. I was about to say more when Alex’s eyes widened and he backed up half a step. My hand automatically shot out and grabbed Jaden’s arm. When I looked at his face I could see why Alex might’ve found his expression alarming.
“Look, Alex, I’m sorry we haven’t talked about-” I began.
“Whatever. You should try dating someone who isn’t a relative,” Alex spat. He marched down the path, leaving Sorrel and her friends shifting uncomfortably.
I crossed my arms over my chest. I genuinely liked Sorrel, and lord knew I wanted to fit in here, but I was well and truly fed up of this happening.
“There’s no blood relation between Jaden and me,” I said firmly. “Alex... well, he wanted more from me than I could give.”
Sorrel shook her head. “Jealousy makes people crazy.”
After they’d gone Jaden examined my face. “Do you want me to beat him up for you?”
I frowned at him. “If I said yes you’d do it, wouldn’t you?”
“The way he’s hurt you? I’d do it quite happily,” he said, grim.
I slumped. “I don’t want to hurt Alex. I just wish he didn’t want to hurt me,” I whispered.
We went on our way. I held Jaden’s hand tightly, keeping my head down so my cap covered my face. Jaden pulled me to a stop and chucked me gently under the chin.