Gun Shy

by Lori L. Lake

  “Thanks. I’ve been working on that. You sounded good, Dez. It’s nice to sing with someone who stays on key and on their line. Lots of people can’t manage it.” Sara picked up a book. “Here, I’ve got one for you. See if you can sing this —if you remember it—but I bet you will.”

  “A real oldie but goodie. Christopher Cross, huh? I know this.” The piano intro began, and Dez let it wash over her. She marveled at how much tone Sara could coax out of the old piano. And then they started to sing “Arthur’s Theme.”

  Jaylynn stood in the kitchen and listened as Sarah and Dez finished that song and moved into another and another. She was so thrilled, she hardly breathed. Right now they were singing Mary Chapin Carpenter’s raucous romp, “Down at the Twist and Shout.” Jaylynn felt like a voyeur, but she knew if she went in the living room, they’d stop. She didn’t want that. Sara had sung so little all year, and when she did, she tended toward mournful tunes. She was pleased to hear her friend belting out a song like she was thoroughly enjoying it.

  The screen door creaked open, and Luella entered carrying an empty chicken platter. Jaylynn smiled at her and put her finger to her lips. Luella set the plate down carefully and moved to stand next to her. Propped up against the counter, side by side, Jaylynn leaned into her and let her head drop to rest on her friend’s shoulder.

  Luella whispered, “I love it when she sings. She doesn’t do it enough.”

  “Same with Sara. And listen to how great they sound together.” They finished “Down at the Twist and Shout” and, without stopping, Sara segued into “Fast Car.” Dez was singing now by herself, her voice deep and expressive. Jaylynn felt the hairs on her arms stand on end, and even in the heat of the kitchen, she shivered. Oh my, she thought. Oh my. What I wouldn’t give to hear that voice singing quietly in my ear, even just whispering a song.

  Soon, she knew, she’d have to have a heart-to-heart talk with Dez. She couldn’t go on like this much longer, her feelings constantly boiling to the surface. Any time soon she could lose her head and say or do something to freak out her partner. She couldn’t afford for that to happen, but it scared her to think of all the risks involved in revealing her feelings. Still, she knew something had to change.

  She felt an odd sense of hope though. The entire atmosphere between them had changed since the bodybuilding show. Though not a single word had been exchanged, her intuition was running on high, and what she was sensing was something profound going on with Dez—and between the two of them. She didn’t know what prompted it, but she wasn’t going to argue.

  The screen door clattered opened and in came Erin. As soon as the girl heard the piano, she was out of the kitchen like a shot. Jaylynn peeked around the corner and watched the bundle of squirmy energy insinuate herself between the piano and Dez. She shifted back on the bench so Erin could sit on the edge of the bench between her legs and lean into her. Long arms circled around the little body. Jaylynn couldn’t hear the conversation that went on for a minute as Sara hunted through the various books and papers on the piano. She looked over at Luella who whispered, “Just go in there. They won’t stop now without disappointing the little pipsqueak.”

  Jaylynn rounded the corner as the piano started up again. It took a moment of puzzling before she recognized the old Beatles song. She heard her sister’s quavery voice, displaying the family penchant for singing slightly off key, as she warbled the Beatles’ “I Wanna Hold Your Hand.” Dez sang quietly behind Erin, keeping her on track, and advanced the pages of the music for Sara.

  They were so into the song that neither of the women nor Erin seemed to notice as, one by one, all the guests made their way into the hot living room and camped out behind them. At the end of the song Vanita clapped and said, “Let’s hear it for the latest new star, Erin Lindstrom.” Erin peeked back, her face squeezed between Sara and Dez.

  Sara leaned over and whispered something into Dez’s ear, and Jaylynn saw the two women nod at one another and break into conspiratorial grins before they turned away again. Sara got her hands set on the piano and started a bass rhythm Jaylynn immediately recognized. She and Dez hollered out the opening words to Steppenwolf’s “Born To Be Wild.”

  Jaylynn looked around the room. Everybody, even Luella, was singing the chorus, bellowing it out so loud that the neighbors must be able to hear it. She couldn’t seem to get the silly grin off her face, and she hoped no one was paying attention to her. She felt this bubble of joy gurgle up from deep inside her, and she wanted to run through the room screaming with delight. Instead, she lowered herself onto the arm of the couch near Vanita and joined in, shrieking at the top of her lungs with the rest of them.

  Sara ended the song by playing the same rock chords she started with, to the cheers of everyone assembled. She hit the final crashing chord and let up, then spun around on the bench with a sheepish grin on her face.

  “You got talent, girl,” Vanita said.

  Sara smiled. “It’s an inspiring group, that’s all.”

  Jaylynn saw Dez still had her arms around Erin, with her back to the room. She was whispering something in the nine-year-old’s ear. The two of them nodded and Erin rose. She took Dez’s hand and they moved away from the piano.

  Luella said, “We need to cut that cake now or these two,” she pointed at Mitch and Crystal, “won’t get any. Come on, Jaylynn.” She picked up a large kitchen knife and handed it to the birthday girl.

  “I’m terrible at cutting cake,” Jaylynn confessed. “Really, I am.”

  In a droll voice, her mother said, “She’s not lying. If you want a mangled piece of cake mashed up in a pile on your plate, go ahead and let her cut.”

  In his best prissy voice, Tim said, “C’mon, Kevin.” He took the knife from Luella. “What would you people do without us?”

  Jaylynn was laughing so hard she didn’t notice Dez and Erin heading out the front door.

  “You’re sure you know which room is Jaylynn’s?” Dez squatted down next to her truck and looked up at Erin who held an envelope in her hand.

  The little girl nodded emphatically. “Oh, yeah. Me and Amanda put our stuff in there on her couch. We’re hoping she lets us sleep over with her.”

  You’re not the only one, Dez thought, then caught herself. What am I thinking? She shook her head from side to side as though that would cause the idea to fall out of her head and stop plaguing her. “Will you sneak upstairs and hide this on her pillow so she won’t find it ’til tonight?”

  Erin nodded, a serious look on her face. “What is it?”

  “Just a birthday card.”

  Erin’s forehead wrinkled as Dez stood. “Why don’t you give it to her now?”

  “I want it to be a surprise. Now hide it under your shirt, okay?”

  Erin tucked it in the waistband of her pink shorts, pulled her shirt over it and reached up for Dez’s hand. “Okay, I’m ready.”

  They strolled back in the house, and when they got inside, Dez gave the girl a look and nodded toward the stairs. Erin took off like a firecracker, making such a racket on the way up the steps that Jaylynn looked up from the cake plate she was holding for Tim. “What’s got into her?” she asked Dez.

  Dez shrugged and gave her a bashful smile. Inquisitive hazel eyes rested upon her for a moment longer before turning back to the cake serving, and Dez breathed a sigh of relief. She’d debated long and hard about whether she would actually give the card to Jaylynn, and now it was too late to take it back. Well—she could ask Erin to retrieve it, but she wasn’t going to. She heard the pounding of little feet and Erin was back, breathless and triumphant. She tipped her head up and put her hands around her mouth. Dez bent over so the child could whisper in her ear. “Mission accomp—accomp—”

  “Accomplished?”

  “Yup. Under the covers on top of the pillow.” She looked up with a very proud smile.

  Dez bent to her ear and said, “Good job. I owe you one.”

  Erin wrinkled up her nose. “Okay, you can take
me to the zoo or something.”

  Dez laughed out loud, and again, Jaylynn looked over at her quizzically. “What are you two in cahoots about?”

  Erin straightened up, put her hands behind her back, and assumed an innocent look. “Nothing,” she said.

  “Yeah, I’ll just bet,” her big sister said. “You having any cake?”

  Dez said, “I think Erin should get a piece with lots of frosting, don’t you, Erin?” The girl leaned back into Dez’s legs and hooked her right arm around a strong thigh.

  “Uh huh,” the little girl said as she gazed up at Dez, a look of gleeful adoration plastered across her face.

  Jaylynn’s mother watched her youngest daughter with amusement, then caught Dez’s eye. Dez smiled at her and winked.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

  After midnight, Jaylynn’s sisters finally fell asleep on the downstairs couch while watching “Balto,” a kid-vid Sara brought home. Her parents went to their hotel before dinner, Tim and Kevin were out, and Sara had hit the hay much earlier. Tired but satisfied, Jaylynn headed up the stairs to her warm and stuffy room. She got ready for bed, stripping down to a T-shirt and briefs, and brushed her teeth with a goofy smile on her face. She peered in the mirror in the bathroom, stared herself in the eye, and thought she looked like a real dolt with the dumb, lovesick expression on her face. But she couldn’t help it. With a sigh she put out the bathroom light and padded over to her room.

  She sat on the couch and examined the new camera. She’d snapped an entire roll of film at the Minnesota Zoo and couldn’t wait to get it developed. She still couldn’t believe Dez consented to go along with her sisters to the zoo late in the afternoon after the party, but then again, who could resist Erin or Amanda when they begged? She couldn’t—which was why, against her better judgment, they’d eaten hotdogs and popsicles for a late dinner. The zoo was fun, and taking the girls there gave her parents a chance to get away for a while by themselves.

  Jaylynn, Dez, and the two girls walked miles, ate cotton candy, and looked at mammals and fish and birds and reptiles. Amanda and Erin screamed with delight on the kiddie rides, and they all petted scores of animals at the petting zoo—except for Dez, who was allergic to them. Jaylynn had to explain to the girls what that meant. For a few moments, they were disappointed that Dez kept her distance, but she was soon forgotten in the rush from one animal to the next.

  Jaylynn picked up the new CD and painstakingly unwrapped the cellophane. She put the disk in her CD player next to the bed. Closing her eyes, she listened to the mellow tones of piano and Gloria’s sultry voice, letting the song roll over her and soothe her. The song’s tempo picked up and she wanted dance. Nice beat. She curled her feet under her and read the words in the libretto. With increasing excitement, it dawned on her that the disk was an entire CD of salsa love songs. Wow. I can’t wait to hear this whole thing.

  Jaylynn adjusted the volume to a low level, clicked off the bedside lamp, and stood. She whipped back the covers and something pointy flew at her, poking her in the thigh before it fell. She clicked on the bedside lamp and stretched a hand down, half under the bed, to find a plain white envelope. With a frown on her face she picked it up and ripped open the flap. The picture on the card inside was a black and white photo of the back of two small girls, hand-in-hand and barelegged. They wore old-fashioned jumpers that she imagined were probably corduroy. One was a curly-haired blonde, the other had short black hair and sported a beret. She opened the card and read:

  Jay,

  Thanks for sticking by me through thick and thin (literally!) This last year has been hard for both of us in a lot of ways.

  You’ve been a good friend and have come to mean a lot to me.

  Hope you have a great birthday on Tuesday and that everything today was memorable. I’m glad I was a part of it.

  Love,

  Dez

  Jaylynn’s heart was beating so fast she almost couldn’t breathe. She read the card through once more. How? When? She narrowed her eyes and remembered back to the early afternoon when Erin and Dez seemed to be conspiring, and now she knew what that was about. Well, well, Miss Big Shot Cop, you got the drop on me repeatedly today. Hmm, we’ll see about this.

  She got up, still carrying the card, and slipped out to the hall, hunting around for the phone cord. She found it trailing along the wall near the attic where it disappeared under the door that led upstairs. She opened the door to Tim’s nest and grabbed the cord, pulling it toward her as she climbed the stairs. She heard the telephone sliding along the floor, and before she got to the top of the steps, it appeared, teetering on the edge. She grabbed it up and skipped back down the stairs, hauling the heavy, old-fashioned phone into her room and shutting the door behind her before setting it on the bed with the card. She crawled up on the bed, cross-legged, and leaned back against the pillows. Gloria’s voice, in Spanish, sang to a peppy salsa number, and Jaylynn couldn’t keep still. She rocked from side to side, happiness pulsing through her.

  Jaylynn dialed the number she now knew by heart but rarely called, and when a familiar husky voice answered, she said, “Hey, you.”

  Dez paused. “Uh, hi.”

  Grinning from ear to ear Jaylynn said, “You think you’re pretty clever, huh?”

  “Some days.”

  “Today is definitely a day I’d have to agree with you.”

  “Oh?”

  “Oh, yeah. Thanks for this card, and I’m listening to Gloria right now.”

  “You didn’t have that CD? I thought you might have gotten it already.”

  “Nope. I’ve wanted it, but I didn’t get around to it yet. It’s fabulous.”

  In a low voice, Dez said, “I’m glad you like it.”

  Jaylynn imagined Dez’s face, knowing she’d be blushing a bit right now. “You were great today with my sisters. They like you a lot.”

  “They’re a lot like you,” Dez said gruffly.

  “You mean energy-wise?”

  “That—and they don’t listen to anything anyone tells ’em to do if they don’t want to.”

  “What? I don’t do that!”

  “Yeah, right.”

  Jaylynn heard a low chuckle in the phone. “I believe I’m getting a bad rep here.”

  “Well-deserved is what I say.”

  Jaylynn laughed, a warm, throaty sound that traveled through the phone line like a shot of adrenaline. With great intensity, Dez wished she were there with the laughing woman. She swallowed and asked, “Where are you?”

  “In my room, sitting on my bed. Where are you?”

  “Standing in the middle of the apartment. Where are the little squirts?”

  “They fell asleep on the couch downstairs, so—unless they wake in the middle of the night and search me out—I get a peaceful night of sleep.”

  Dez nodded. She picked up the phone and carried it over to her bed then, tucking the receiver against her chin, lay down, crossed her legs at the ankles, and put her hands behind her head. “What’ll you do with ’em tomorrow?”

  “I don’t know. My stepdad has only been here once before, so we’ll probably do some sightseeing. They won’t be here that long. Dez, I still can’t believe they’re here!”

  Dez smiled. “That was a pretty good surprise party. You really were surprised, weren’t you?”

  Jaylynn made a snorting sound into the phone, “Are you kidding—blown away! I was totally clueless, though I did think you and Crystal were acting kind of odd. As far as I knew, you two were being your same weird selves.”

  “Who you calling weird? You’re the one who thinks a reporter can talk to Dolly the Sheep.”

  “Ha! That’s rich,” Jaylynn said in a taunting voice, “from someone who breaks out in a sweat when a little petting zoo sheep strolls by.”

  “Can I help it if I’m allergic?”

  They talked on, joking and teasing, until Dez glanced over at her bedside clock to see it was almost one a.m. They’d been on the phone almost half an hour. �
�What time are the midgets getting up tomorrow?”

  “Why?”

  “ ’Cause it’s getting late, and before you know it, they’ll be jumping on your bed. You better get some sleep.”

  “Good point.” Jaylynn let a wave of fatigue wash over her. Much as she wished she could keep talking, she was feeling as tired as she ever had. She yawned. “If we go to the movies tomorrow, you want to come?”

  “Not if it’s to Pokéman or one of those Disney movies.”

  A bark of laughter burst out of Jaylynn. “At least I know where you stand.”

  “Probably couldn’t go anyway, Jay. I have to work, remember?”

  “Well, that sucks.”

  “Enjoy your family. Call me after they leave Tuesday—if you feel like it, that is.”

  “Okay.” She yawned again. “Good night, Dez.”

  “ ’Night, rookie.”

  Jaylynn put the receiver back on the cradle and set the phone on the floor. Fluffing up the spread, she covered her legs and lay on her side, her arms clasped against her chest and the card still next to her on the bed. With a sigh of contentment she closed her eyes, listening to the full, lilting voice on the stereo. She felt herself drifting, and “. . . don’t make me wait much longer . . .” were the last words she heard before she fell asleep.

  Sunday and Monday flew by. Jaylynn’s family constantly kept busy hiking, shopping, going to the movies, eating meals with various combinations of Sara, Tim, and Kevin, and even riding on a paddlewheel boat from Saint Paul down to Hastings. All too soon, Tuesday and the time to say goodbye arrived.

  At the airport, Jaylynn parked the totally overloaded Camry, and the five occupants extricated themselves and suitcases and bags and backpacks. They had so much stuff Jaylynn finally set off to find a cart. As she strode away, leaving her folks with the girls by the car, her mother caught up with her.

  “Lynnie, wait up.” They walked side by side through the parking ramp and over to the cart rack by the elevators.