by E. M. Leya
Jeremy couldn't stop crying. He'd held everything in for so long, almost scared to let the feelings out. He hated that he was doing this to D, but he'd been the one to trigger it all by even asking the question. It was as if he'd known that that was the one thing that he hadn't dealt with, hadn't come to terms with. He took a deep breath, trying to calm himself, sniffing hard as he pulled back from D's embrace. "I'm sorry."
D smiled softly. "Don't be sorry. I'm glad you finally let it out. It's not going to heal you, but it's the first step. I want to be here for you when you need a shoulder, when you need to talk or let out the emotions you've got building up inside you. Not just as your team member, but I'd like to do it as your boyfriend too."
Jeremy's eyes widened. This wasn't what he expected.
"I've gone nuts the last few nights with you leaving and not saying more than a quick goodbye. Like you, I enjoy what we have. I'm not good at all this relationship stuff. I think the last real boyfriend I had was just after I got out of the Army, and that only lasted a few months. I might not always say or do the right things, but I want to try. I don't have any interest in going out to clubs, picking up anyone else. I want what we have. I admit fully I have an addiction to sex, and someday, maybe I'll be able to tell you why, but it's not the partners I desire, it's the physical need of sex. If you can handle that, if you can handle me, I'd like to give this a go." D tilted his head to the side. "What do ya say?"
Jeremy nodded as he wiped the last of the tears from his cheeks. "Yeah, I'd like that."
"Good. No more rushing to leave me every night?" D grinned.
"No more. I still want some nights alone, but I'll talk to you when I want those, but even more, maybe I just need some nights away from the house. I feel like when I'm there, I should be working. We can stay here or at my place. I don't care which." Jeremy shrugged. "I just can't shut it off when I'm there. There's always more I can do."
D cupped Jeremy's cheek against his palm. "I know. Carter and Trenton are the same way. Bryon has to kick them out to get them to stop, and even then, they argue. We'll get out of there more, and once we start doing stings, we'll feel more productive, like we are doing something to actually help. We'll meet with Jessica tonight and if all goes well, there's no reason we can't start doing stings in a week or two. Plus, more than anything, we need to find you help. I know Rani is helping, but I mean someone serious about making this a career, someone who can hold the fort down when you need to get away."
"I'm okay, honestly. We'll find someone, but it's not our biggest worry right now." Jeremy didn't want to hold the team back from starting just because he was the only one really digging for info. "I've already got four cases ready to go. I'll just need to make sure nothing has changed. Plus, I started digging into one today that looks like he makes a lot of videos. I'm trying to track where he finds the kids he's using. We have to get going on things."
D nodded. "But don't let it get to you, okay? Shut it down when you need to, and I'm here for you to talk to. I know what Carter and Trenton go through. I want you to come to me if it gets to be too much. Even if it's just a bad day. And when it comes to what happened with Chad, I'm here to listen. It's something that will take time to come to terms with. Years maybe. Don't try and deal with it alone."
"I won't. It helps to have said something. Things happened so fast, I never took the time to really deal with it all. Talking to you helps." Jeremy took a deep breath. "I'm sorry I ran from you."
"It's okay. I'm just glad we worked it out. Tonight, after Jessica leaves, we'll head back here or to your place and spend some time together. I'd like to say we could go out on a date, but we'd need to be careful. Too much being in public isn't good for either of us right now."
"I've got a solution for that. How about this weekend we take some time off and grab food to take with us and go out looking for dump sites? We can check out the lakes in the area, have a picnic or something, but still be away from the crowds." It was something Jeremy was going to suggest anyway as a business need, but making a date out of it made it more enjoyable.
"Perfect idea." D brushed a soft kiss against Jeremy's lips. "I hate to leave, but we better get back. I get the feeling Jessica is one of those who expects everything to run on time."
Jeremy laughed. "She's a tough woman. I love how she calls them pedofucks."
D grinned. "Yeah, me too. She's going to be interesting to work with, but I have no doubts that she's going to be great once we teach her what to do. My only worry is can she separate her hostility and not take things too far. Whatever is in her past haunts her. She could break at any minute."
"We'll watch her, and hopefully, this will take the edge off whatever is haunting her. Like you've said, we're a family. We look out for one another." Jeremy nodded. "Let's go. But someday soon, I want to come back and see the rest of the house."
D grinned. "Tonight, and I'll show you the best room in the house, my bedroom."
Glad they'd talked and things weren't so up in the air anymore between them, Jeremy followed D out to the Jeep. He'd woken up this morning trying to figure out how to face D each and every day, but now, being in a relationship, he was more secure and comfortable to let his feelings grow. D wasn't going to dump him for the next easy lay. He hoped what they had could last, but if his past taught him anything, the unexpected could tear everything away.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
The energy in the house was thick as they all prepared for the sting they were doing in about an hour. They'd spent nearly two weeks training, and everyone in the house, including Jeremy and Rani, had learned how to do everything from make sure a site was secure, prepare a countermeasure kit for their car and use it, and also how to secure and punish both male and female pedophiles. They'd spent hours on the gun range practicing, which D loved. Colorado was much more gun friendly than California and the resources and range options were great in the area. He'd also sat down alone with each team member and talked to them about what they were feeling. Until he could find a therapist to work with the team, he would have to take the job. He wanted to make sure everyone was handling things okay.
He was confident they were ready. He would go with Jessica on the first few stings, letting her learn what to do, then once they were both sure she was ready, he'd rotate nights with her according to her availability.
Rani was as ready as he could be. D had thought that Beau's medical room was impressive, but Rani had gone beyond that. It had everything in it. Some of the stuff D couldn't pronounce, had never heard of, and honestly wondered what they could need it for, but if Rani wanted it, he could have it. Whatever kept them safe and alive. As prepared as he was, Rani was the one person D hoped wouldn't be working all night.
It was impossible not to be excited. Where the new team members were nervous, and he dared say somewhat scared, he was ecstatic to get back out there. He missed the rush of taking these assholes down. Cautious, but not nervous, he focused on making sure they had everything they would need.
"Jessica, did you get everything?" He glanced over at her as she pulled her hair back in a ponytail.
"Yeah, I think so." She glanced at him, unsure.
"Name it off." D glanced down, making sure the burner phone he was about to put in his pocket had a full charge.
"String, knife, flashlight, syringe, zip ties, torch, baggie, lockpick, and tubing." She felt around in her pockets. "My phone is there by you."
D nodded. "Gloves?"
"Shit." Jessica turned and rushed out of the room to grab them.
D smiled. This was why they did things together the first few times. He needed everything to be habit for them, each step natural.
"Here ya go." Jeremy walked in, handing him a thumb drive. "You be careful out there."
"I will be. I'll be home before you know it." D stuffed the drive into his pocket before reaching out and pulling Jeremy close. "I have more reason than ever to come back safe." He kissed him softly, then groaned as Jeremy deepened the
kiss.
"You're going to get DNA all over the place," Jessica teased as she walked back in.
D ignored her, taking his time to kiss Jeremy goodbye. When he pulled away, he took a deep breath. "You know what I need when I get back, right?"
Jeremy smiled. "I'll be ready for you."
D loved that Jeremy was okay with the fact that he wanted to fuck after every sting. He wasn't sure Jeremy understood his need, but he seemed more than willing to go along with it. Since their talk, things had been good. They'd spent most nights together at one or the other's house, only staying at the STK house twice when Jeremy had been up late working on the computer.
D worried that he wasn't going to be good in a relationship. He had no clue what to do. He'd watched his friends date, but this was him. He wasn't anything special. He was just some fucked up kid who'd gotten lucky he hadn't killed himself growing up. The thought had been there, and he'd even tried a couple times. His past was a disaster until Bryon had stopped him and Xander from trying to murder Xander's father. That was the day everything had changed. The day he'd joined STK and found a purpose for his life, a vent for his anger and pain.
"You guys be safe. I'd rather not dirty the med room any time soon." Rani walked into the kitchen.
"Yeah, I'd rather you keep it clean as well." D glanced over at Jessica. "Got your mask?"
"In my pocket." Jessica nodded.
"Okay, guys, we'll message you before we go in and as soon as we get out. You guys know what to do if anything goes wrong, but it won't. You guys have been amazing helping us get all this ready. Without a team, none of this would happen." He looked around the room. "Let's go save some kids."
"And take down some pedofucks!" Jessica grinned.
D gave Jeremy a quick kiss, then triple checked he had everything he needed. With a nod from Jessica, the two of them headed out the door.
D let Jessica drive. She knew the area better than he did. When she'd offered, he was more than okay letting her take the wheel. "You holding up okay?"
"You mean other that wanting to vomit all over myself? Yeah, I'm good." She glanced over at him. "I'll be fine. It's just the fear of getting caught that has my nerves on edge."
"That's easy to solve. We don't get caught."
"Says the man who just busted out of jail after being caught."
D shrugged. "But how many times before that didn't I get caught? I'm the one who should be nervous. They'll bust you out if you get locked up. I've used my one get out of jail free card. Seriously, this is an easy location. The nearest neighbor is over half a block away, and the man is careless about his security. We'll be in and out in no time."
He'd picked a safer location for their first sting together. He wanted to help Jessica get over her first-time nervousness and find a bit of confidence in what they were doing.
The guy they were after had been arrested three times already. Once for raping an older woman who was working alone at a convenience store, and twice for raping young girls under the age of fourteen.
Jeremy had found videos of the man with three other girls, and with a little digging, found out they were his granddaughters. The fact that any parent would leave their kids unattended with a man who'd already been arrested for raping a child was incomprehensible. D wasn't going to let the police slap this guy on the hand again. It was time to put a stop to it once and for all.
"How do you decompress after?" Jessica asked as she focused on the road.
"Everyone has a different way. For me, it's sex. I fuck until I can't feel anything else but the pleasure. Others drink, some exercise or run it off. It just depends on you. You'll find what you need. If it's something like drinking, just keep it controlled. No one is going to get on your case for having a few drinks after a sting, but if it gets out of hand, the team will intervene. Your safety comes first always. It might take some time to figure out what works for you. Until then, scream in your pillow, buy a punching bag, or take up weightlifting."
"Yeah, I think I'll probably opt for the run." Jessica glanced at him. "We're about two minutes away."
"Park down from the house a bit, but not enough to draw attention from the neighbors. You just don't want to be directly in front of the house in case they hear your engine." He was glad it was a new moon and there wasn't a lot of light out.
"Okay, once we park, we'll sit for a second and watch the area. If there are a lot of lights on at the neighbors' homes, you wait. If there are people around, you pull away and leave and come back in twenty minutes and try again. If anything feels off, you make sure you know what it is and don't take any risks. Your gut is almost always right. Learn the difference between how it feels to be nervous and how it feels when you're being warned. Don't ignore your gut."
Jessica pulled up near the location, cutting the lights and killing the engine.
"What do you see?" D asked.
"All visible houses are dark. I don't see anyone walking or around the area, but there is a dog in the fenced yard two houses down that I noticed when we passed by."
"Good thing to notice. This time we are far enough away it shouldn't matter, but normally, when the houses are close, that's a warning. You need to make sure the owner isn't just letting the dog out, and you also need to make sure if the dog sleeps outside, that he isn't going to bark when you get out of the car. Approach from the other direction if you can, but if there is no way around it, cancel the sting. A dog barking will wake people and put you at risk. We'll have homes and yards we go into with dogs. We usually take several team members on those so someone can tranquilize the dog while the others get into the house and deal with the humans." D looked around, confident they were safe, but he left it up to Jessica to decide. "What do you think?"
"We're good. I say we go in." She took a deep breath.
"Okay, take the burner phone out and text Jeremy."
She took out her phone and sent the text. "Now we wait for them to respond, right?"
"Yep. They have the police scanner and also all control of any cameras in the area. You don't move until they confirm." D focused on everything around him.
The text came back almost immediately.
"Okay." Jessica glanced at him. "Ready."
D nodded. "Keep your hood over your head, but don't pull your mask down until we are at the house. Keep your head down so if we missed any cameras, they won't get a good view of you." He pushed the door open. "Meet me at the back of the car and keep walking. Don't stop until we get to the house."
She followed instructions perfectly, careful to not slam her door as she got out and met him at the back. They walked side by side, confident, but not quickly, hoping to appear like two friends going home. It didn't take long to reach the house and slip into the shadows.
They'd already talked over everything and she decided she wanted to use her new lockpicking skills to get inside. D pulled down his mask now that they were in the shadows and watched her do the same. When they got to the door, he tried the handle, not shocked when it didn't open. He nodded to her and stepped aside.
Lockpicking wasn't easy, and it took a trained and steady hand to do it quickly. It was one of the skills he was best at, but others were slower. He'd learned to be patient when out with others, and that came in handy now. Jessica took several tries to get it open, but she did it, and that was all that mattered.
They both had guns on them, but he hoped not to have to use them as he quietly opened the door and stepped inside. The house wasn't completely dark. The light from the clock on the kitchen stove was bright enough to allow them to see the area, and D took the lead. They'd memorized the layout of the house, and headed for the master bedroom. They were almost there when a cat shot out in front of them meowing loudly.
Jessica gripped his hoodie from behind as she made an audible gasp.
They both froze as the cat disappeared into another room. D took a breath, calming his nerves, listening for any sound that the cat had woken the man.
Hearing not
hing, he continued forward until they stood beside the bed where the man slept. He moved to the side, allowing Jessica to get closer.
Just like they'd trained, she had the syringe out and ready. She didn't hesitate as she thrust it into his neck and pushed the medicine in.
The man jerked awake, but just as quickly went limp.
"Good job." D smiled at her as he reached over and turned on the lamp.
The man stared up at them, confusion filling his eyes.
"Don't worry, we won't be staying long. We're just here to make sure you don't hurt your granddaughters anymore." D smiled as he watched what Jessica would do.
The confusion in the man's eyes turned to fear as Jessica looked around her. "Best to move him to the floor. Nothing to tie him to up here." She reached out without hesitating and pulled the man off the bed, smiling as he slammed to the floor. "Much better."
D smiled, glad Jessica seemed to be handling this okay. There were no signs of nervousness, though he was sure she was feeling plenty of it.
Jessica got on her knees and started to tug the boxers off the man's legs.
A whoosh of air came from his mouth, sounding like a moan, causing Jessica to pause.
"That can happen. The medication paralyzes them and keeps them from talking, but some can manage a cry or gasp. It's never much." He smiled at the man. "Don't worry, it only lasts a little while. You can still feel the pain through it all, and that is the important part."
Jessica laughed. "You're horrible, but right. I guess this pain is nothing like the pain his granddaughters felt." She had his boxers off and pushed his legs apart. "Okay, first string, right?"