by Rona Jameson
I’m the only one who should get to see his junk.
“Stop being a prude. You got a load of Chase’s junk, so it was worth it, right? We both got to see what we shouldn’t.” Julia grinned. “I hate that we’re sixteen. I want to be eighteen.”
“We’ll be eighteen in just over a year,” I told her. Our seventeenth birthdays were quickly coming up.
My heart pounded at what I’d seen. I’d never seen a naked boy in the flesh before—my cheeks were hot with embarrassment. It didn’t help that Julia wouldn’t stop peeking at Rogan. I really didn’t want to hear about what he had or how hugely hung he was. Julia saved herself when she added that Chase was a very close second while licking her lips.
“Next time we’re staying home, because that can’t be unseen.”
“I certainly don’t want to forget what I’ve seen this afternoon.” Julia smirked. “There is nothing wrong with looking at a hot guy.”
I rolled my eyes. “We weren’t only looking at a hot guy, Julia. We spied on them while they got naked.”
“Mm-hmm, I know.” Julia fanned herself. “I bet they wouldn’t have a problem spying on us girls if the opportunity arose.” Julia cocked a brow.
“We need to leave before they get out,” I suggested. “And Rogan would kill anyone who spied on me skinny dipping.”
“No way. I want to get a look at Leon,” Julia said, ignoring my comment about Rogan. “Being on the football team, he’s built like Rogan and Chase. I bet he’s just as big.”
My face felt as though it was on fire.
Hearing Julia sigh, I complained, “I want to go.”
“Don’t ruin my fun.” Julia gasped. “Oh…you have to look.”
She grabbed my wrist and tried to haul me up off my butt, which she eventually did. It was either that or have bruises along my arm.
“What?” I mumbled and my eyes popped wide. “Oh…”
“That’s Leon.”
“I recognize him.”
Julia snickered. “Is that so?”
“You know what I mean,” I snapped but found I couldn’t take my eyes off of him. Leon was all muscle, just like Rogan and Chase, but what held our attention was his right hand, and what he was doing with that hand.
Encouraging shouts erupted from the river, drawing my gaze away from Leon. I wished I hadn’t looked because when I did, I met Rogan’s gaze. With the distance between us, I wasn’t sure he actually saw me, but he was certainly looking directly at where I watched from.
Rogan went quiet in the water and slowly started moving toward the bank. When he rose out of the water, it glistened on his skin. I did the first thing that entered my head; I grabbed Julia by the arm and tugged her up and ran back toward the house—totally busted.
By the time we reached the house and locked ourselves in my bedroom, I thought I was having a full-blown panic attack.
“He saw me watching, Julia.”
Julia was no help as she had curled up on my bed and laughed. Tears ran from her eyes while she offered me an amused grin, wiggling her brows. “You have to admit that it was so much better than spending the afternoon studying.”
I flopped down beside Julia. “What am I going to say to him?”
“The truth.” Julia turned onto her stomach and held my gaze. “That I wanted to spy and you went along with me to get a load of—”
I slapped my hand over Julia’s mouth and nudged into her. I groaned as I stared at my best friend with her blond hair and china doll white skin beside my dark hair and tanned skin.
“I think Rogan would go nuts if he knew I’d caught sight of his friends naked and horsing around. You know how protective he is.”
Julia gave me an odd look before she rolled to her back.
In truth, I hated that Julia watched Rogan all the time, and I was sure Julia liked him a lot more than just to make Leon jealous.
Rogan appeared amused when Julia really tried to get his attention, but that was all I had ever seen on his face. Chase was another matter altogether. The way he stared at me when Rogan wasn’t around made me uncomfortable and embarrassed. Sometimes I even wondered if Chase knew about Rogan and me—our feelings, our love.
Rogan had his pick of girls, but he never took them up on the offers I would see in their eyes. I may not be experienced, but I was old enough to know what the look meant. If I weren’t so embarrassed about anything to do with sex, I’d ask Rogan about it. But I’d decided I didn’t want to know how experienced he was. It would hurt too much.
No matter what, Rogan was my best friend, even before Julia, not that I’d admit that to Julia.
Rogan was my brother, something I struggled with calling him these days, but he was someone I could always count on to be there for me. Except, I wasn’t sure how I was going to face him knowing he’d seen me at the river. If I knew Rogan, he’d already know it was Julia who’d dragged me after them. It didn’t make it any easier because I’d seen him. Naked! That was something I was never supposed to see. What a sight though—all that beautiful, bronzed, masculinity on display.
I was no longer clueless about how the male species looked in the flesh.
6
Fallon
It was dark outside and Julia had finally gone home, but only after her mom had called. She hadn’t wanted to leave but, to my relief, Julia’s mom hadn’t given her any other choice.
After the embarrassment of the afternoon, I had thought it best to stay hidden in my bedroom. Unfortunately, my stomach had other plans as it rumbled unhappily. The protein bar I found in my school bag didn’t quite cut it. I tried to study for the test I had in the morning, but even that couldn’t distract me. I should have eaten dinner, then maybe I wouldn’t be so hungry.
Glancing at the alarm clock, it read twenty past ten. With luck, Rogan would already be passed out. I heard him come up to his room over an hour ago. Our parents were out with Dad’s brother, Uncle Frank, so they wouldn’t be back until late. Maybe I could sneak downstairs and make a sandwich. I’d made plenty of midnight snacks in the dark over the years, so avoiding Rogan shouldn’t be a problem.
Slowly unlocking my door, I snuck downstairs and sighed when I made it without disturbing him. There was enough moonlight filtering in through the window that I left the light off and moved to the fridge. I quickly grabbed some leftover chicken and the jar of mayonnaise to make a sandwich. Turning, I let out a piercing scream as I shoved the door closed with my hip.
How Rogan managed to catch both the dish of chicken and the jar of mayonnaise, I didn’t know, but he had. He put them on the kitchen table and then turned to face me. I was frozen in place. My eyes looked anywhere but at him as I remembered watching him and his friends that afternoon—all that naked skin.
“Look at me, Fallon,” Rogan demanded.
“I can’t.”
He chuckled. “Serves you right for spying on me this afternoon.”
Annoyed, I snapped my eyes open and met his gaze. “I wasn’t spying on you. Julia was. My eyes went in a different direction.”
Liar.
I moved toward the breadbasket and took out four slices of white bread. I grabbed two plates and started making us both a sandwich while Rogan silently watched me.
“Who?” he growled, moving closer, breathing down my neck.
“Who what?” I asked, playing dumb.
“Chase or Leon?”
Turning, I shoved against his chest so that he backed away. “What difference does it make? You’ve made it clear that we have to carry on as normal. So I can look at whoever I want!”
His features changed and he looked sad.
Briefly closing my eyes, I sighed heavily and admitted, “I’m embarrassed okay. Seeing you like that was never supposed to happen, no matter how much I wanted to.” My face heated. “I never wanted to see Chase or Leon like that if you must know.”
I shoved a plate with the sandwich over to him and sat opposite, staying silent, embarrassed.
“I ache for
you, Fallon.” He dropped his face to stare at the table. “But it can never happen.”
“Knowing the reason why we can’t be together doesn’t make it any easier,” I admitted softly.
We ate silently until Rogan cleared his throat. He offered me a soft smile. “It’s weird,” Rogan admitted. “You’re sixteen and shouldn’t be seeing anything like that.”
I choked on a piece of my sandwich as my eyes widened, and then narrowed. “I’m not naïve, Rogan. Jeez, we have the Internet, plus you saw me half-naked once.”
“Internet! What does that mean?” he growled, ignoring my naked comment.
“Um, nothing.”
His eyes narrowed. “I’ll find out what you mean. You know I will.”
“Stop threatening me.” I munched on the sandwich and was disappointed when it was all gone.
“I’m not threatening you, but I bet all I would have to do is give Julia some attention and she’d tell me what you’ve both been looking at online.” He raised a brow.
“Don’t you dare!” I went quiet. “It would crush me to watch you flirt with her.” I tilted my head. “She’s really after Leon.”
“I’m aware. So is Leon.” He shrugged. “If she’d stop trying to get into my pants to make Leon jealous, we could all hang out together sometime, but no way am I encouraging her. I won’t be used for any reason.”
“So, if I get her to stop and convince her you’re not interested, we can forget about today and hang out?”
“Yeah,” he immediately agreed. “I really miss hanging out with you. It’s been a while.”
“I miss that too.” More than I’d ever let him know.
Leaning forward, amusement clouded his gaze. “Did you watch what Leon was doing?”
My embarrassment was now complete.
“I know you did,” he continued. “I do that too, but in the privacy of my bathroom. So when you’re remembering what you saw, I want you to picture me.”
My heart was ready to jump out of my chest as I held his gaze. “Don’t.” I averted my eyes and begged, “Please tell me Leon and Chase don’t know we were there?”
Rogan stayed silent.
“They know?” I whispered.
Nothing from Rogan. I wanted to shake him, or kiss him, and then his face split into a grin.
“No, they don’t know. I had you for a minute.” He laughed.
“Ugh!” I stood and shoved him with my hand. “That was unfair.”
“You deserved it after watching me skinny dip.”
“I told you,” I groaned, as we headed upstairs, “I wasn’t watching you.” I stopped for a second, heat already on my face before I teased, “But I’m going to be imagining you from now on.” I managed to smirk before I rushed into my room and locked the door.
I slid down the door amused that, for once, I’d gotten the last word. The look on his face was certainly worth my embarrassment. He hadn’t been expecting the teasing. I was the one who blushed and stayed silent. Smiling, I put my ear to the door. Five minutes later, I heard Rogan’s bedroom door close.
Knowing I was going to have to face him in the morning over breakfast, I questioned the wisdom of my parting words, especially since he knew I’d meant them.
Rogan
I grinned as I entered my bedroom, aching with want after Fallon’s parting shot about thinking about me. My smile slipped as I remembered my reaction to Fallon as she watched me naked in the river. I’d climbed out and stood on the bank with my body tight, a desperate need to be with her rocking me to my very core. She ran and I dived back into the water to hide the throbbing between my legs before Leon and Chase caught sight of me. It took me a while to calm down enough to climb out and dress. We went back to Leon’s house until it got dark, and I decided I could no longer hide out at my friend’s house.
I dropped on to the end of my bed knowing I had to be the one to keep Fallon away from me. After today, it had to happen. It was the last thing I wanted, but it was the right thing to do. I wasn’t sure I could handle seeing the spark go out of her beautiful eyes, and it would go out if I crushed her.
I swallowed hard and fell backward to my bed as tears burned my eyes. They slipped free and trailed down into my hair. I’d never been so mixed up before. My heart told me to stay with Fallon, but I knew deep in my mind that nothing but trouble would come of my love for her.
Confused and unsure if I could go through with hurting her, more tears fell. My heart knew with every breath I took that Fallon was mine and always would be.
7
Fallon
Mom, Dad, and Rogan talked over their breakfast while I poured some juice into a glass and Lucky Charms into a bowl. Milk sloshed over the rim and ran along the counter before I captured it with a paper towel. I hated that. I always spilled milk when pouring from a full carton.
From the corner of my eye, I caught Rogan watching me with a smirk on his lips. Sighing heavily, I forced my embarrassment from the day before back down where it belonged and took my seat opposite him at the table. He knew I was embarrassed and he was trying to get me to lift my face and meet his gaze. That was so not happening. Then he nudged his foot against mine under the table.
I snapped my head up in his direction and narrowed my eyes. Rogan grinned and laughed in response.
Mom stopped in the middle of conversation with Dad and looked between the two of us. “Is there something going on between you two?”
“No,” I answered quickly.
“Yes,” Rogan answered.
“Which is it?” Dad asked, frowning.
“Fallon and Julia followed us to the river yesterday,” Rogan blurted and my eyes widened in surprise and panic. “I think Julia saw more than she should have.”
I gasped and kicked him under the table.
“Ouch! No need to get violent,” he muttered, trying his hardest to keep his laughter inside. “I’m heading to school,” he announced. “Want a ride?”
Mom stared with a smile on her face, but Dad continued to frown. The only answer to Rogan’s question was, “Yes.”
Before I could change my mind, I quickly grabbed my backpack and followed Rogan out the front door to his car.
“You do realize that no matter how hard you shoot daggers into my back, nothing is going to happen?” Rogan drawled, getting into the blue Mustang he loved.
“I can’t believe you told Mom and Dad,” I complained, dropping into the seat beside him. “They know you guys skinny dip out there…and after the talk, I think you should have stayed silent.”
“I admit I shouldn’t have said anything, but I’m sick of watching what I say in front of them.” He shook his head. “I’m sorry, but it was worth the look on your face.”
I narrowed my gaze. “I probably wore the same look you did when I told you I imagined you the way Leon was.” Smirking, I turned and watched the houses as we passed them by on the way to school.
Rogan simmered all the way to school, his knuckles white, clenching the steering wheel. He didn’t speak or acknowledge me until he pulled into his usual parking space. Exhaling heavily, and with a blank stare out of the front window, he said, “Yesterday, at the river, never happened.”
I blinked as I watched him get out of the car and run over to greet Leon and Chase with only a glance back at me before he headed inside.
There was a lot of “never happened” adding up.
I was still sitting in the car five minutes later when Julia appeared.
“Why do you look like you’ve seen a ghost?”
“Um, what?” Grabbing my backpack, I got out of the car and slammed the door closed. “Rogan is being an asshole.”
Inwardly, I cringed at the word I used to describe him, but it was the only one that came to mind. After our conversation last night, I wasn’t sure how to take him. He wasn’t usually so moody and forward.
“Does it have anything to do with yesterday?” Julia whispered, a dreamy look on her face.
Nudging into her, I admi
tted, “It has everything to do with it, and I really would rather forget all about it.”
“Are you serious?” Julia tugged me to a stop. “How can you ever forget seeing what we did?” She smirked. “Your brother is…big.”
I groaned and sagged against my locker. “That’s it. He’s my brother and I interact with him all the time. It’s embarrassing knowing that he knows I saw his junk.” I turned to my locker. “It’s awkward and I hate it.”
Julia watched me closely and agreed. “Okay. I’ll stop mentioning it.”
“I’d appreciate that.” I sighed. “Rogan said if you stop trying to get into his pants to make Leon jealous, we can hang with them again.” I watched Julia from the corner of my eye. “I miss being part of their group. I also miss making Corinne and Amber—to name two members of Rogan’s fan club—jealous.”
Julia closed her locker and slouched against it. “I really have to stop going after Rogan to get at Leon, huh?”
“Yeah, you do.”
“Does that mean you have to stop making goo-goo eyes at Chase?”
I rolled my eyes. “I do no such thing.”
“Whatever,” Julia uttered as though she didn’t believe me, but when Julia stilled and watched over my shoulder, I knew it was either Corinne or Rogan approaching.
“Out of favor with your brother, I see,” Corinne let the words drip off of her tongue with relish.
One day, I was going to put Corinne in her place, and I’d take great pleasure in doing so. “There is nothing wrong with my brother and me.” I turned and faced Corinne. “He’s always grumpy in the morning.”
She sniggered. “He wouldn’t be grumpy in the morning if he’d spent the night with me.”
Feeling the anger and, dare I admit it, jealousy rising inside of me, I snapped, “That’s my brother you’re talking about. Stop it!”
Corinne’s eyes widened and Julia grabbed my wrist. “Let’s go,” Julia whispered.