Holiday Wishes: Christmas of Love Collaboration

by S. L. Sterling

  "Anyway, I am going to go back to my room. Get some rest and seriously talk to him."

  Kenzie leaned over and hugged me tightly and headed off toward her room.

  "Kenzie, wait a minute."

  Kenzie walked back over and sat down. "What is it?"

  "Um, if you caught Devon kissing someone else, what would you do?"

  "I don't think you'd want to know." Kenzie laughed to herself.

  "I'm serious. I don't mean now. I mean when we were younger."

  "I'd confront him."

  I nodded, growing quiet again.

  "Is that what happened?"

  I blew out a breath and nodded, clasping my hands together in my lap.

  "That's why you ended things with him, because you caught him kissing someone?"

  "Yes. It was on Columbus Day weekend. I arrived at his dorm and he was there with another girl. I watched the entire thing."

  “You never asked him about it?”

  “No, I ran, he didn’t even know I was going to be there.”

  "Girl, you need to talk to him. You should have talked to him years ago, but it’s not too late. Don't take your second chance away."

  Kenzie leaned in and pulled me in for a hug, then she got up and headed back to her room. I sat there for another half hour thinking about what she said before I decided to head back to my room.

  I'd quietly entered my room and ducked into the bathroom where I took a hot shower, and now I stood in front of the mirror, wrapped in my bathrobe, looking at my reflection. I had just finished putting on a couple of coats of mascara when I heard a knock on the door. He really should have left already, I thought to myself. I put the cap back on my mascara and threw it in my bag and pulled the door open.

  Declan wasted no time. He pulled me in for a good-morning kiss, and my body told me to go for it. My head, however, didn't. I wasn’t angry at him any longer, but angry at myself because I had acted on emotion instead of confronting him and giving him a chance to explain. As soon as our lips parted, I pulled away and looked at him.

  "I thought you would have left already," I bit out, looking down at his half-dressed body. He still had the body of that eighteen-year-old football player, only more muscular, and I blushed when I realized he had followed my eyes.

  "Well, good morning to you too," he said as I pushed my way past him and walked to my suitcase, neatly folding my dress from yesterday and placing it on top of the rest of the clothing.

  "As much as I enjoyed last night, something is on my mind, and I need to know, do you still want this to be closure?"

  I looked into his blue eyes, all the hurt coming right back to the surface. "Yes, Declan, I really think that would be for the best."

  "Harper, I don't understand. Why?"

  "Don't play stupid, Declan. You know. Don't pretend that you don't."

  "Harper, I have no idea what you are talking about. I don’t understand what happened all those years ago that caused you to walk away from me."

  "Let me give you a hint. Do you remember Columbus Day weekend, 2014?"

  "Yeah, how could I not? I was missing you so, and honestly thought we were closer than ever. We had spent all that time calling, texting, and face timing, and even though we were thousands of miles apart, I felt as if you were with me every day. I remember suggesting that I come to you or you to me or even that we meet up between our schools, but you insisted you couldn't. You had some project due."

  “That’s right, but let me enlighten you. The last time I spoke to you before that weekend, you sounded so down on the phone. It worried me. I mean, you were an all-star football player in high school, but only third string in college. I knew you were not only suffering with that but with your classes, and you hated that guy you had for a roommate. I had just read a few articles related to suicide and was so afraid for you. So, after I got off the phone with you on the Wednesday, I decided I would surprise you. I took a cab to the airport, hopped on a plane, and booked a hotel for us for the long weekend, all with the money I had saved up from tutoring.”

  “What? You were there?”

  “Yes, I showed up at your dorm that Friday to surprise you, only the surprise was on me. I found you in the common room, kissing another girl.”

  “You saw it?”

  “I did, and I didn't make a scene. I didn't say a word. Instead, I left with my heart in my throat and spent the rest of the weekend in the hotel trying to decide what I should do. After a good long cry, I spent my time sightseeing alone, until my flight left on Sunday night. When I got home, I unfriended and blocked you on all social media.”

  I watched as a look settled on his face, a look that told me he knew the exact moment that I was talking about.

  "So, you remember?"

  "Yeah, but it wasn't what you think."

  "Really?"

  “Yes, really. There were parties, all kinds of activities to take part in that weekend. I wasn't interested in any of them. That Friday, I tried calling you in the afternoon, but your phone went straight to voicemail. You never didn't answer, and I imagined the worst.”

  “I was on a flight, how was I going to answer you?”

  “I didn’t know that, and I was angry that you hadn’t responded. Somehow, my roommate and his girlfriend talked me into going to some frat party. I ended up doing a couple keg stands and stumbled back to dorms, landing in the common area and not my room, like I had planned. There I met this girl, and we exchanged dating stories. She was going through something like us and was feeling down. I thought that perhaps talking with her would help not only her but me, but the next thing I knew, she leaned in and kissed me. It was the beer mixed with sheer stupidity. Regardless, I stopped it pretty much as soon as it started and explained to her I had a girlfriend whom I loved.”

  "Yeah, that is easy to say now."

  "Harper, I planned on telling you. I went back to my room and texted you for the entire weekend. I felt so guilty, but you never gave me a chance. I called you every day for weeks, but when I figured out you had blocked me, I resorted to texting, and still nothing. I had no clue why you weren’t speaking to me."

  “Well, now you know why.” I closed my eyes, fighting back tears and then turned to him, “Just so you know, I received every text you sent, but every time one appeared all I could do was cry. Declan, when I saw you with her, my heart shattered into a million pieces. I didn’t know what to do.”

  "Harper, can you ever forgive me?"

  Declan kneeled in front of me and brushed a loose strand of hair out of my face, his hand resting on my cheek.

  I had wished for this, wished silently that I could find it in my heart to forgive him, but my heart still hurt. I had never thought I would walk in on him with another girl. I had thought we would be together forever.

  "These kinds of things take time."

  "But you've had five years. Actually, it been a little over five years since that night. Surely, it’s easier now."

  I looked into his blue eyes—blue eyes that were begging me for forgiveness and another chance. I could tell that whatever had happened that night hadn't been done with ill intent, but still I couldn't just cave.

  "Really, you think it’s easier now. It was easier until you showed up here. I don't know, Declan. I didn't know the entire story. I just got the apology. I need time. Fresh time to digest everything."

  I watched as Declan nodded, then stood up and looked down at me again. "I will let you have all the time you need. We have brunch in an hour. I am going to get ready. I'll come back and pick you up."

  “Really, it’s unnecessary. I can just meet you and everyone else downstairs.”

  "Give me forty minutes," he said, glancing at his watch and heading for the door.

  As soon as the door clicked shut, I lay back on the bed and searched my heart. I needed to search myself to see if I could forgive him for everything, and I was leaning towards yes, considering how I felt last night in his arms.

  Chapter 8

&nb
sp; Declan

  "Thank you for the mimosa," Harper said as we walked back from the restaurant.

  "You're welcome."

  "And thank you for the dessert. How did you ever remember that apple crisp was my favorite?"

  Harper had been sitting looking over the dessert menu for almost ten minutes. I knew she had been eying that. She hadn't changed one bit. She had told me once that she always ordered the yogurt and fresh fruit because it made her feel less guilty after having a carb-laden meal. So, instead of allowing her to torture herself, I slipped the menu from her hands and ordered for her. Her eyes had lit up when the server set the full bowl of apple crisp, complete with vanilla ice cream in front of her.

  "Are you going to tell me how you remembered?"

  "The same way I remembered that mimosas were your favorite. There really isn't anything that I don't remember about you, Harper. You were my first genuine love and, honestly, if I had my way, you'd be my last."

  "Declan..."

  I held my hand up to stop her from saying anything. "No, Harper, listen. I know I've messed up, but now I at least know you saw me mess up. I accept that I am going to have to earn back your trust and your heart. It's not going to happen overnight, so no matter how long it takes, I won't give up, and even if it never happens, well, at least I can say that I tried."

  I was fairly sure I saw a tear in Harper's eyes as she looked in the opposite direction. I said nothing more on the subject. Instead, I took her hand in mine and we walked through the gently falling snow back to the hotel.

  We stepped inside the lobby and I glanced at the clock. It was almost one. "Did you want to share a cab to the airport?

  Harper nodded. "What time does your flight leave?"

  "I fly out about six. It was the only flight I could get after Devon and Kenzie were already gone. Otherwise, I wouldn't have gotten to say goodbye. What about you?"

  "Same."

  "Okay, so we will have an airport dinner together then. Sound good?"

  Harper nodded. "I'm going to get my things." She had walked halfway across the lobby and then turned and made her way back to me. She leaned in and kissed me gently on the cheek without saying a word and then wandered off toward her room.

  We both stood and watched Devon and Kenzie board their plane for their honeymoon. The other guests in the wedding party had gone, which just left Harper and me. She wandered over and sat down beside her luggage; the smile disappearing from her lips.

  "What is it?" I asked, sitting down next to her and looking at my watch. We still had almost three hours until our planes were to begin boarding.

  "I just hope they have a good time."

  "I'm sure they will. We will too. I spotted an Island Grill back there."

  "Oh really. That used to be—"

  "You're favorite. It was mine too, in case you've forgotten."

  "Well, let’s go. I haven't had their food in ages. They closed their restaurant in Seattle a little over two years ago." Harper said, grabbing the handle of her bag and standing up.

  We sat up against the window in the restaurant, sipping on a drink, when the server dropped our dessert down in front of us.

  "So, what are your plans when you get back home?" I asked, digging his fork into the lava cake in front of me.

  "I guess I will have to get a Christmas tree before all the lots sell out. I also have a series of meetings to get through at the ad agency before the holidays. I had to reschedule everything because of the wedding. What about you?"

  "I get to find out if I got my promotion. I've been waiting to hear from the airline, but nothing has come in yet."

  "So, what is this promotion?"

  "I'd be based out of a different location. I'd have a direct schedule. Right now, I fly wherever and whenever the airline needs me. It would make having a life a little easier."

  “So where would you be moving to?”

  I cleared my throat. I wasn’t sure how she would react to knowing I would move back to Seattle.

  “Is it some enormous secret?” She laughed.

  “I’d be moving back to Seattle.”

  The look that settled on her face was one I wasn’t sure I wanted to see. She picked up her napkin, wiped her mouth, and took a sip of her drink. "We probably should get the bill," Harper said, glancing down at the clock on her phone. "It's getting close to boarding time."

  "You're good for a bit yet," I said, glancing at my watch and signaling our server for our bill.

  "I’m sorry. I just hate being late. I also hate being the last person to board the plane." She let out a tiny laugh and tried to reach for the bill that the server had placed on the table, but I grabbed it first.

  “I've got it,” I said, pulling it towards me and placing my credit card down on the table as and uncomfortable silence fell between us. “Are you not going to say anything?”

  She looked down at the ground and shook her head. "Declan, I can't, please."

  Once the bill had been paid, I walked Harper to her gate. I stood off to the side as she checked in with one of the boarding agents. She smiled as she slowly walked back over to me. "Thank you for walking me here. They are going to board in five minutes."

  "Well, I should probably go then," I said, glancing at my watch.

  "Yes, I guess. I wouldn't want you to be late and miss your flight."

  I shrugged. "I shouldn't be. Still have lots of time."

  "Despite what you may think, it was good to see you again."

  "Wait, what? You mean you actually enjoyed seeing me again?"

  Harper smiled and bit her bottom lip as she met my eyes and nodded.

  "Would it be too much to ask you to stay in touch with me?" I questioned, pulling my card from my pocket and holding it out for her to take.

  She reached out and gripped the card from my hand, her fingers brushing against mine, sending that familiar shock through me. She looked down at the card and then up to my eyes. "I think I could do that."

  The airline made her boarding announcement, and I leaned in and pulled her tightly against me, wishing that I didn’t have to let her go. I felt her arms go around my neck and I closed my eyes, leaned in, and kissed the side of her neck. I whispered, "Don't make me wait too long."

  Chapter 9

  Harper

  My mind had been littered with thoughts of Declan the entire flight home. I replayed over and over everything that had happened the entire weekend, right up to the last kiss we shared and the words he had whispered in my ear before I boarded the plane.

  Once I landed, I stopped at the grocery store and picked up a few things before heading back to my apartment. I showered, cooked dinner, threw in a load of laundry, and cleaned my already clean apartment to keep myself from texting Declan.

  Kenzie was on her honeymoon, so I couldn't call her. I had left my work laptop at work, so I couldn't even check emails. Instead, I made my way to my bedroom, pulled the curtains, flipped the TV on, and crawled into bed. Soon I lay there staring at the ceiling, wondering what Declan was doing at this hour.

  Had they delayed his plane? Was he stuck in traffic? Had he really meant what he said when he suggested that we stay in touch?

  I rolled over and pulled his card off my night table and ran my fingers over the raised printing on the card. I stared at his name printed in black, fighting within myself not to text him. I knew that texting him already would make me appear desperate, so I put the card down and rolled back over onto my back, propping up my pillow.

  I flipped through the channels, finding a movie, and had just gotten into it when my phone vibrated on the nightstand. I reached for it, wondering who was messaging me this late. It surprised me to see Kenzie's name on my phone.

  I opened the message, fearing that something may be wrong, only to be bombarded with a slew of questions as my phone vibrated in my hand.

  Kenzie: Have you forgiven Declan yet?

  Kenzie: Are you guys getting back together?

  Kenzie: Have you spoken to
him since you have gotten home?

  Kenzie: Seriously, could you answer me already?

  Kenzie: I need to know or else I will not enjoy myself one bit.

  Kenzie: I need to know if we are going to celebrate by being pregnant together in nine months?

  I giggled to myself, the last message throwing me into a fit of laughter. I quickly replied telling her not to worry about me, to stop thinking about it and to enjoy the evening with Devon.

  I waited for the next slew of text messages but the only response I received was a message telling me to go and message him, which concluded with a tongue sticking out emoji. I smiled to myself and shut the screen off and went to throw the phone back down on the nightstand when it once again vibrated with another message.

  Expecting it to be Kenzie, I turned the screen back on and was shocked to see a message from Declan. Instantly, I felt warm, and my hands shook as I opened the message.

  Declan: I hope you got home safely.

  I felt myself smile and replied, instantly deleting what I had written.

  Declan: Sweet dreams Harper.

  I felt as if I were fifteen again as I lay there trying to figure out what to respond. After twenty minutes, I kept it simple and typed “you too” and hit send.

  Chapter 10

  Declan

  I stood outside of my boss’s office, excitement running through me. I'd gotten the transfer and the permanent flight schedule. I sure would miss the bustling streets of New York City, but to return to my friends and the place I grew up was exciting. My phone vibrated in my hand, and I looked down at the screen and smiled.

  HARPER: Do you think you will make it for Devon and Kenzie's New Year’s Eve Party?