One Thousand and One Nights

by Richard Burton

  Say to the lovely maid, i’ the veil of azure dight, “By Allah,

  O my life, have pity on my plight!

  For when the fair entreats her lover cruelly, Sighs of all

  longing rend his bosom day and night.

  So, by thy charms and by the whiteness of thy cheek, Have ruth

  upon a heart for love consumed outright.

  Incline to him and be his stay ‘gainst stress of love, Nor let

  what fools may say find favour in thy sight.”

  Then the damsel set wine before the Khalif and taking the lute, played a lively measure and sang the following verses:

  Wilt thou be just in thy love to others and deal with me

  Unjustly and put me away, while others have joy in thee?

  Were there for lovers a judge, to whom I might complain Of

  thee, he would do me justice and judge with equity.

  If thou forbid me to pass thy door, yet from afar To greet thee

  and to bless, at least, I shall be free.

  The Khalif bade her ply Abou Nuwas with wine, till he lost his wits; when he gave him a full cup, and he drank a draught of it and held the cup in his hand. Er Reshid bade the girl take the cup from him and conceal it; so she took it and hid it between her thighs. Then he drew his sword and standing at the poet’s head, pricked him with the point; whereupon he awoke and saw the Khalif standing over him, with a drawn sword. At this sight the fumes of the wine fled from his head and the Khalif said to him, ‘Make me some verses and tell me therein what is come of thy cup; or I will cut off thy head.’ So he improvised the following verses:

  My tale, indeed is hard to tell: The thief was none but yon

  gazelle.

  She stole my cup of wine, whereof My lips had drunken but one

  spell,

  And hid it in a place, for which My heart’s desire’s

  unspeakable.

  I name it not, for awe of him, In whom the right thereof doth

  dwell.

  ‘Confound thee!’ quoth the Khalif. ‘How knewst thou that? But we accept what thou sayst.’ Then he ordered him a dress of honour and a thousand dinars, and he went away, rejoicing.

  John Payne’s translation: detailed table of contents

  THE MAN WHO STOLE THE DISH OF GOLD IN WHICH THE DOG ATE.

  There was once a man, who was overborne with debt, and his case was straitened upon him, so that he left his people and family and went forth in distraction. He wandered on at random till he came to a high-walled and splendidly built city and entered it in a state of wretchedness and despair, gnawed with hunger and worn with the toil of his journey. As he passed through one of the streets, he saw a company of notables going along; so he followed them, till they entered a house like to a royal palace. He entered with them, and they stayed not till they came in presence of a man of the most dignified and majestic aspect, seated at the upper end of a saloon and surrounded by pages and servants, as he were of the sons of the Viziers. When he saw the visitors, he rose and received them with honour; but the poor man was confounded at the goodliness of the place and the crowd of servants and attendants and drawing back, in fear and perplexity, sat down apart in a place afar off, where none should see him.

  After awhile, in came a man with four hunting-dogs, clad in various kinds of silk and brocade and having on their necks collars of gold with chains of silver, and tied up each dog in a place set apart for him; after which he went out and presently returned with four dishes of gold, full of rich meats, one of which he set before each dog. Then he went away and left them, whilst the poor man began to eye the food, for stress of hunger, and would fain have gone up to one of the dogs and eaten with him; but fear of them withheld him. Presently, one of the dogs looked at him and God the Most High inspired him with a knowledge of his case; so he drew back from the platter and beckoned to the man, who came and ate, till he was satisfied. Then he would have withdrawn, but the dog pushed the dish towards him with his paw, signing to him to take it and what was left in it for himself. So the man took the dish and leaving the house, went his way, and none followed him. Then he journeyed to another city, where he sold the dish and buying goods with the price, returned to his own town. There he sold his stock and paid his debts; and he prospered and became rich and at his ease.

  After some years had passed, he said to himself, ‘Needs must I repair to the city of the owner of the dish, which the dog bestowed on me, and carry him its price, together with a fit and handsome present.’ So he took the price of the dish and a suitable present and setting out, journeyed night and day, till he came to the city and entering, went straight to the place where the man’s house had been; but lo, he found there nothing but mouldering ruins and dwelling-places laid waste, over which the raven croaked; for the place was desert and the environs changed out of knowledge. At this, his heart and soul were troubled and he repeated the words of him who saith:

  The privy chambers are void of all their hidden store, As

  hearts of the fear of God and the virtues all of yore.

  Changed is the vale and strange to me are its gazelles, And

  those I knew of old its sandhills are no more.

  And those of another:

  The phantom of Saada came to me by night, near the break of

  day, And roused me, whenas my comrades all in the desert

  sleeping lay.

  But, when I awoke to the dream of the night, that came to visit

  me, I found the air void and the wonted place of our

  rendezvous far away.

  When he saw what the hand of time had manifestly done with the place, leaving but traces of the things that had been aforetime, the testimony of his eyes made it needless for him to enquire of the case; so he turned away and seeing a wretched man, in a plight that made the skin quake and would have moved the very rock to pity, said to him, ‘Harkye, sirrah! What have time and fortune done with the master of this place? Where are his shining full moons and splendid stars; and what is the cause of the ruin that is come upon his abode, so that but the walls thereof remain?’ Quoth the other, ‘He is the miserable wretch thou seest bewailing that which hath befallen him. Knowest thou not the words of the Prophet (whom God bless and preserve), wherein is a lesson to him who will profit by it and an admonition to whoso will be guided thereby in the right way? “Verily it is the way of God the Most High to raise up nothing of this world, except He cast it down again.” If thou enquire of the cause of this thing, indeed, it is no wonder, considering the vicissitudes of fortune. I was the master of this place and its builder and founder and owner and lord of its shining full moons and radiant damsels and of all its splendid circumstance an magnificent garniture; but Fortune turned and did away from me wealth and servants, overwhelming me unawares with disasters unforeseen and bringing me to this sorry plight. But there must needs be some reason for this thy question: tell it me and leave wondering.’

  So the other told him the whole story, sore concerned at what he heard and saw, and added, ‘I have brought thee a present such as souls desire, and the price of thy dish of gold, that I took; for it was the cause of my becoming rich, after poverty, and of the reinstating of my dwelling-place, after desolation, and of the doing away of my trouble and straitness from me.’ But the poor man shook his head, groaning and weeping and lamenting, and answered, ‘O man, methinks thou art mad; for this is not the fashion of a man of understanding. How should a dog of mine make gift to thee of a dish of gold and I receive back its price? This were indeed a strange thing! By Allah, were I in the straitest misery and unease, I would not accept of thee aught, no, not the worth of a nail-paring! So return whence thou camest, in health and safety.’

  The merchant kissed his feet and taking leave of him, returned whence he came, praising him and reciting the following verse:

  The men and eke the dogs are gone and vanished all. Peace be

  upon the men and dogs, whate’er befall!

  John Payne’s translation:
detailed table of contents

  THE SHARPER OF ALEXANDRIA AND THE MASTER OF POLICE.

  There was once, in the coast-fortress of Alexandria, a Master of Police, Husameddin by name, who was one night sitting in his seat of office, when there came in to him a trooper, who said to him, ‘Know, O my lord, that I entered the city this night and alighted at such a khan and slept there, till a third part of the night was past, when I awoke and found my saddle-bags cut open and a purse of a thousand dinars stolen from them.’ No sooner had he done speaking than the magistrate called his officers and bade them lay hands on all in the khan and clap them in prison till the morning; and on the morrow, he caused bring the instruments of torment and sending for the prisoners, was about to torture them, [to make them confess], in the presence of the owner of the stolen money, when, behold, a man pressed through the crowd and coming up to the chief of the police, said, ‘O Amir, let these folk go, for they are wrongly accused. It was I who robbed the trooper, and here is the purse I stole from his saddle-bags.’ So saying, he pulled out the purse from his sleeve and laid it before Husameddin, who said to the soldier, ‘Take thy money; thou hast no ground of complaint now against the people of the khan.’ Thereupon the latter and all who were present fell to blessing the thief and praising him; but he said, ‘O Amir, the skill is not in that I came to thee and brought thee the purse, but in taking it a second time from the trooper.’ ‘And how didst thou take it, O sharper?’ asked Husameddin.

  ‘O Amir,’ replied the thief, ‘I was standing in the money-changers’ bazaar at Cairo, when I saw yonder man receive the gold and put it in his purse; so I followed him from street to street, but found no occasion of stealing it from him. Then he left Cairo and I followed him from place to place, casting about by the way to rob him, but without avail, till he entered this city and I followed him to the khan. I took up my lodging beside him and watched him till he fell asleep and I heard him snoring, when I went softly up to him and cutting open his saddlebags with this knife, took the purse thus—’

  So saying, he put out his hand and took the purse from before the chief of the police, whilst the latter and the trooper and the folk drew back, watching him and thinking he would show them how he took the purse from the saddle-bags; but, of a sudden, he broke into a run and threw himself into a reservoir hard by. The chief of the police called to his officers to pursue him, but before they could put off their clothes and descend the steps, he had made off; and they sought for him, but found him not; for the streets of Alexandria all communicate one with another. So they came back, empty-handed, and the chief of the police said to the trooper, ‘Thou hast no recourse against the folk; for thou foundest him who robbed thee and receivedst back thy money, but didst not keep it.’ So the trooper went away, having lost his money, whilst the folk were delivered from his hands and those of the chief of the police; and all this was of the favour of God the Most High.

  John Payne’s translation: detailed table of contents

  EL MELIK EN NASIR AND THE THREE MASTERS OF POLICE.

  El Melik en Nasir once sent for the chiefs of the police of New Cairo, Boulac and Old Cairo and said to them, ‘I wish each of you to tell me the most remarkable thing that hath befallen him during his term of office.’ ‘We hear and obey,’ answered they. Then said the chief of the police of New Cairo, ‘O our lord the Sultan, the most remarkable thing that befell me, during my term of office, was on this wise:

  John Payne’s translation: detailed table of contents

  Story of the Chief of the Police of New Cairo.

  There were once, in this city, two men apt to bear witness in matters of blood and wounds; but they were both given to wine and women and debauchery; nor, do what I would, could I succeed in bringing them to account. So I charged the vintners and confectioners and fruiterers and chandlers and bagnio-keepers to acquaint me of these two, when ever they should anywhere be engaged in drinking or debauchery, whether together or apart, and that, if they or either of them bought of them aught for the purpose of carousal, they should not conceal it from me. And they replied, “We hear and obey.”

  One night, a man came to me and said, “O my lord, know that the two witnesses are in such a house in such a street, engaged in sore wickedness.” So I disguised myself and went out, accompanied by none but my page, to the street in question. When I came to the house, I knocked at the door, whereupon a slave-girl came out and opened to me, saying, “Who art thou?” I made her no answer, but entered and saw the two witnesses and the master of the house sitting, and lewd women with them, and great plenty of wine before them. When they saw me, they rose to receive me, without showing the least alarm, and made much of me, seating me in the place of honour and saying to me, “Welcome for an illustrious guest and a pleasant cup-companion!”

  Presently, the master of the house went out and returning after awhile with three hundred dinars, said to me, without the least fear, “O my lord, it is, we know, in thy power both to disgrace and punish us; but this will bring thee nothing but weariness. So thou wouldst do better to take this money and protect us; for God the Most High is named the Protector and loveth those of His servants who protect each other; and thou shalt have thy reward in the world to come.” The money tempted me and I said in myself, “I will take the money and protect them this once; but, if ever again I have them in my power, I will take my wreak of them.”

  So I took the money and went away; but, next day, one of the Cadi’s serjeants came to me and cited me before the court. I accompanied him thither, knowing not the meaning of the summons; and when I came into the Cadi’s presence, I saw the two witnesses and the master of the house sitting by him. The latter rose and sued me for three hundred dinars, nor was it in my power to deny the debt; for he produced a written obligation and the two others testified against me that I owed the amount.

  Their evidence satisfied the Cadi and he ordered me to pay the money; nor did I leave the Court till they had of me the three hundred dinars. So I went away, in the utmost wrath and confusion, vowing vengeance against them and repenting that I had not punished them.’

  Then rose the chief of the Boulac police and said, ‘As for me, O our lord the Sultan, the most remarkable thing that befell me, during my term of office, was as follows:

  John Payne’s translation: detailed table of contents

  Story of the Chief of the Boulac Police.

  I was once in debt to the amount of three hundred thousand dinars, and being distressed thereby, I sold what was behind me and what was before me and all I could lay my hands on, but could raise no more than a hundred thousand dinars and abode in great perplexity. One night, as I sat at home, in this state of mind, there came a knocking at the gate; so I said to one of my servants, “See who is at the door.” He went out and returned, pale and trembling in every nerve; so I said to him, “What ails thee?” “There is a man at the door, seeking thee,” answered he. “He is half naked, clad in skins, with a sword and a knife in his girdle, and with him are a company of the same fashion.” So I took my sword and going out to see who these were, found them as the boy had reported and said to them, “What is your business?” “We are thieves,” answered they, “and have made great purchase to-night and appointed it to thy use, that thou mayst pay therewith the debts that oppress thee and free thyself from thy distress.” “Where is it?” asked I; and they brought me a great chest, full of vessels of gold and silver; which when I saw, I rejoiced and said in myself, “It were ungenerous to let them go away empty-handed.”

  So I took the hundred thousand dinars I had by me and gave it to them, thanking them; and they took it and went their way, under cover of the night. But, on the morrow, when I examined the contents of the chest, I found them gilded brass and pewter, worth five hundred dirhems at the most; and this was grievous to me, for I had lost what money I had, and trouble was added to my trouble.’

  Then rose the chief of the police of Old Cairo and said, ‘O our lord the Sultan, the most remarkable thing that be
fell me, during my term of office, was on this wise:

  Story of the Chief of the Old Cairo Police

  I once had ten thieves hanged, each on his own gibbet, and set guards to watch them and hinder the folk from taking them down. Next morning, when I came to look at them, I found two bodies hanging from one gibbet and said to the guards, “Who did this, and where is the tenth gibbet?” But they denied all knowledge of it, and I was about to beat them, when they said, “Know, O Amir, that we fell asleep last night, and when we awoke, we found one of the bodies gone, gibbet and all, whereat we were alarmed, fearing thy wrath. But, presently, up came a peasant, jogging along on his ass; so we laid hands on him and killing him, hung his body upon this gibbet, in the stead of the missing thief.”

  When I heard this, I marvelled and said to them, “Had he aught with him?” “He had a pair of saddle-bags on the ass,” answered they. “What was in them?” asked I and they said, “We know not.” Quoth I, “Bring them hither.” So they brought them to me and I bade open them, when, behold, therein was the body of a murdered man, cut in pieces. When I saw this, I marvelled and said in myself, “Glory be to God! The cause of the hanging of this peasant was no other but his crime against this murdered man; and the Lord is no unjust dealer with [His] servants.”’

  John Payne’s translation: detailed table of contents

  THE THIEF AND THE MONEY-CHANGER

  A money-changer, bearing a bag of money, once passed by a company of thieves, and one of the latter said to the others, ‘I know how to steal yonder bag of money.’ ‘How wilt thou do it?’ asked they. ‘Look,’ answered he and followed the money- changer, till he entered his house, when he threw the bag on a shelf and went into the draught-house, to do an occasion, calling to the slave-girl to bring him an ewer of water. So she took the jug and followed him to the draught-house, leaving the door open, whereupon the thief entered and taking the bag of money, made off with it to his companions, to whom he related what had passed. ‘By Allah,’ said they, ‘this was a clever trick! It is not every one could do it: but, presently, the money-changer will come out of the draught-house and missing the bag of money, will beat the slave-girl and torture her grievously. Meseems thou hast at present done nothing worthy of praise; but, if thou be indeed a sharper, thou wilt return and save the girl from being beaten.’ ‘If it be the will of God,’ answered the thief, ‘I will save both the girl and the purse.’