by Lori Wick
“Father?” she cried in a pitiful squeak. “Is that you, Father?”
“Jackie?”
It was Clayton’s voice.
“Clay. Oh, Clay.” Her voice was only a little louder.
“Where are you?”
“In the tree,” she said before the tears came and took her voice away. She cried with relief but also pain. Her legs were in agony. Her legs! The words shouted in her head. This was not her father coming, but Clayton, and her white–stockinged legs were exposed like a picture she’d seen one time of a dance-hall girl.
In the midst of all these tumultuous thoughts, she heard the horse draw near. Clayton must have come inside the fence. A moment later she looked down and saw him below her.
“Are you all right?” he asked.
“No, I’m not,” she told him, sniffing. “It’s getting dark, and I can’t get free.”
“Here.” Clayton had moved until he was directly below her feet. “If I push your feet up, maybe you can grab the branch above you. Can you try?”
“Yes.”
Clayton caught the sole of a shoe in each palm and pushed. The position was nearly impossible for leverage, but it gave Jackie just enough room to work. One foot lifted away from him to step on a strong branch and then the other followed. Clayton backed Miner off so he wasn’t directly below her and then looked up to see her progress. She was standing easily now, but she was so far off the ground that he knew she shouldn’t jump.
Clayton moved in yet again. “Here, Jackie, come down to this branch and then step down to me.”
“Where’s the bull?” Her voice wobbled.
“I can’t see him right now.” Clayton ducked his head to look around the field. “He must have wandered off. Go ahead and jump to me.”
Jackie finally heard what he had said to her.
“You mean onto the horse?”
“Yes. I’ll catch you.”
“Oh, Clay …” Jackie’s voice was trembling again.
“It’s all right,” he coaxed, and after several minutes’ worth of soothing words she jumped. Clayton caught her just as he’d promised and settled her across the front of the saddle. She was trembling violently, and for a moment he kept his arms around her.
“Are you okay?”
“I just wanted to see the birds,” she stuttered. “And then the bull came and my dress caught and they couldn’t eat!” She was gripping his hand hard now. “They couldn’t even eat while I was there, and they sounded so hungry.”
It was too much for Jackie. She buried her face in her grubby hands and sobbed. Clayton knew it was time to get home. He heeled Miner forward to the gate and left the pasture. Jackie’s shoulder was against his chest, and she was still crying into her hands. He didn’t know what to say. Horrible images had flashed through his mind as he’d ridden to find her. He had been tortured with thoughts that she might have met some young man who tried to hurt her, and here she had only innocently come to see a bird’s nest and ended up being chased by a bull.
“It’s all right, Jackie,” Clayton said when she began to calm. He looked up to see a rider coming toward them. “I think your father is coming.”
Jackie’s head snapped up. It was indeed Morgan.
“Please let me down, Clayton.”
Clayton stopped immediately and helped Jackie to the ground. Her legs nearly buckled, and he leaned to keep hold of her hands, but a moment later he watched as she flew toward her father. The older man had come off his horse, and Clayton could hear her cries from dozens of yards away as Morgan held and comforted his daughter.
“It was getting dark,” he heard her gasp as he drew near.
“I know, but I’ve got you now, Jack.” Morgan looked up at Clayton. “She seems unhurt—just upset.”
“Yes. The bull chased her, and then she couldn’t get out of the tree.”
Morgan nodded, but darkness was falling fast now, and Clayton could see him only dimly.
“I’ll get home now,” Clayton said, “before anyone worries any longer.”
“Thank you, Clay,” Morgan said simply. Because Jackie’s legs still hurt, Morgan lifted her onto the horse. He led the animal home rather than sit with her, talking in calm tones as they moved. As soon as they arrived, Addy put Jackie to bed. She hovered over her for a long time and left a light burning in her room until she had fallen asleep. Addy still didn’t know exactly what had happened, but at the moment it didn’t matter. Some of the lace on Jackie’s dress was torn, but she was home safe, and they could all start to breathe again.
“Hello.” The word came quietly from Clayton as he came soft–footedly into the Fontaines’ living room.
It was the afternoon of the next day. Jackie had heard her mother open the front door but hadn’t heard the voices. She should have been working at the store this day, but her father had insisted she stay home.
“Hello, Clay,” Jackie returned, putting her book aside.
“I came to see how you were doing.” He sat in the chair across from her and thought she looked a little pale.
“I’m all right, but I managed to scare the life out of my father. He wants me to take it easy for a few days.”
“That’s not a bad idea,” Clayton agreed, but Jackie only shrugged.
“What are you doing today?”
“Not much. My dad is due in any time, and when he comes back we’ll be headed back out.”
“You don’t usually wait for him, do you?”
“No, but unless he needs me, I won’t be going at all. I leave here in three weeks, and I want to spend as much time as possible at home.”
“Three weeks?” Jackie questioned him quietly. “I thought you would be here until the end of August.”
“No. I’ve decided to go earlier.”
It was a good thing that Jackie’s face was already pale, or Clayton might have questioned her more than he did. His simple words were enough to make her want to howl with dismay. He was going away. Not in six weeks, but in three. What in the world would she do?
“Are you sure you’re all right?” Clayton asked.
“Yeah,” Jackie lied, forcing a smile. “Thanks for coming to the rescue last night.” She was pleased with her quick recovery. “I wasn’t certain if I’d thanked you. It was so silly to be caught in that tree, and well, thanks, Clay.”
“You’re welcome,” he told her warmly, relieved that her strained features were from thoughts about the night before. For a moment his mind dwelt on the whole incident.
“Why does the darkness frighten you?”
Clayton watched her frown and look a bit irritated. He wished he had kept the question to himself. “Were you hurt?” he asked to fill the breech.
“Only some scratches on my legs.” Jackie’s face was expressionless, the irritation gone.
“I’m glad it was nothing worse.”
The conversation was trailing off, and Jackie simply didn’t have the stamina to keep things going. Usually all she had to do was ask Clayton about school and he would start talking fifteen to the dozen, but if she even thought about his schooling right now or how she’d felt the night before, she was going to burst into tears.
It wasn’t a surprise that Clayton rose to leave just a few minutes later.
“I think I’d best get on my way, Jackie. You still seem a little tired.”
She managed to smile. “Yesterday was a long day.”
“Well, take it easy. I’ll see you later.”
“Bye, Clay.”
Jackie sat for a long time after he left. In fact, she was so quiet that Addy forgot she was even home. She wandered past the living room a little later and started in surprise.
“Jackie,” she said with a hand on her heart. “You’re so quiet that I forgot all about you.” It was then she saw the tears in her daughter’s eyes.
“What is it, honey?”
“He’s leaving, Mother. In three weeks he’s leaving. I thought it was six, but it’s only three.”
&nbs
p; Addy came close now and sat on the arm of Jackie’s chair. She couldn’t find any words, but it didn’t seem to matter. Jackie buried her face in her mother’s lap and sobbed.
The next day began like any other for the Taggart family, except that Elaine was a little quieter than usual. Both of the children noticed but didn’t comment. They missed their father as well, and talking about it wouldn’t bring anything more than tears. They both went about their daily chores with quiet efficiency.
Elaine was thankful for their lack of intrusion, because in truth she did not want to share what was on her heart. She had woken early, around 4:00 A.M., with an awful sense of pain. She wasn’t actually hurting, but her breathing felt constricted and her body ached all over. She rose very quietly and checked on Clayton and Milly. When she found them both sleeping soundly, she returned to her bedroom to pray. She was well, and her children were unharmed, so it had to be something else.
Elaine had experienced this feeling once before—it was over five years ago now. Kevin had been late, and when he’d finally arrived home, she learned he’d been bitten by a rattlesnake. His leg was still swollen, and he was laid low for more than a week. Now the feeling was on her again. Elaine knelt by the bed she shared with her husband and let her head fall on his pillow.
I can feel something is amiss, Lord, she prayed in her heart. I am not given to flights of fancy, but I know Kevin is hurt. He may even be with You right now. I trust You, Father. Give me the grace to make it through whatever You have for us. I would want him back, You know this, but You also know what’s best. Help the children in this, Lord. Help them to keep trusting You no matter what.
A tear slid down her face, a tear of pain for the man she loved. She hated the thought of his being alone and hurting, so she prayed that if he was injured, someone would find him soon.
I would like to see him one more time, Lord. I admit this freely to You, but again I ask You to help me to trust and believe. Touch Kevin now, Father. Help him to keep his eyes firmly fixed on You, no matter what the pain or circumstances.
When it was time for breakfast, Elaine rose stiffly from the floor to dress for the day, but she prayed often as the day progressed. In fact, she prayed constantly. It was just after lunch before she had any real idea as to why she felt so burdened.
Cormac O’Brien pulled into the yard with his longbed wagon. Kevin’s horse was tied to the back, and Kevin lay in the wagon bed. There was no color in Elaine’s face as she took in the sight of her husband’s body, but seeing him didn’t paralyze her. Cormac was talking, and she was listening to every word and already moving to do what had to be done.
“They brought him in in the back of a wagon.”
“Is he dead?”
“I think he might be. Clayton was uptown, and Paddy came running into the bank to find him.”
The sound of Clayton’s name brought Jackie’s head around. Fontaine’s General Store was filled with almost as much gossip as the barber shop, and Jackie had already learned to block out most of it. However, Clayton’s name was another matter.
“What happened?” Jackie broke a firm rule and intruded into the conversation.
“Kevin Taggart’s been hurt, or maybe killed. They’ve sent for the doc.”
“How?”
“I don’t know, dear, but land surveyors live a dangerous life. He could have fallen or been attacked by a wild animal.”
The older woman who was speaking finished her sentence, but Jackie didn’t hear. She was already moving to find her father.
“Father, I have to go to the Taggarts’. Mr. Taggart has been hurt, and I have to see if they need me.”
“Your mother was just here and told me, Jack. She’ll go and see what needs to be done.”
Morgan started to turn away, but Jackie grabbed his arm with bruising strength.
“Father,” she spoke, her heart in her eyes. “I have to go.”
Morgan looked down into her face and saw that it was true. She looked ready to come undone if he turned her down. And anyway, if she was that determined to go, she would be of no use in the store.
“All right, Jack.”
The words were barely out of his mouth before Jackie ran for the door. Her father called something after her, but she never heard. Her mind was already at the Taggarts’ wondering how she could be of the most help.
19
Jackie knew better than to knock at the front door and disturb the goings-on within, but neither was she comfortable just walking inside Clayton’s house. It was for this reason that she stood outside for quite some time and prayed.
“Please, God,” she said softly. “Show me how I can help here. Show me what to do or say.”
Doubts began to assail her. Reaching out to others was so new to Jackie that she didn’t know where to start. Eddie and her mother always knew what to do, as did Danny, but Jackie was a complete novice. Jackie didn’t know if she’d have made it inside at all, but Paddy’s father chose that moment to come out.
“No need to knock, Jackie,” he spoke kindly to her in his thick brogue. “Just go on in.”
“Thank you, Mr. O’Brien.” Jackie smiled with genuine relief and slipped inside.
The living room was empty, and surprisingly, so was the kitchen. Jackie could hear voices in the rooms upstairs, but she couldn’t make herself go up those steps. She was casting her eyes around the room, still praying for help, when she spied the coffeepot. It was cold to the touch and not very full.
Jackie fought back tears of relief. This she could do. This she could handle. With simple movements and an efficiency born of years of practice, she made the coffee. From there she searched for food and began to cut vegetables for a soup. She had just started it in a big pot on the stove when she heard someone on the stairs. Milly came partway into the room and stopped in surprise when she saw her.
“Hello, Milly.”
“Hi, Jackie.” Her voice told of her wonder.
“I… um… just came to see if I could help. I took it upon myself to make some coffee and start some dinner. It’s just soup, vegetable soup.”
“Thank you.”
“Would you like some coffee?”
Milly could only nod before she sank into a kitchen chair. Jackie poured her some coffee and sat across from her.
“Is your father going to be all right, Milly?”
“They don’t know,” she whispered. “His horse stumbled and rolled. It rolled right on top of him.” Tears filled her eyes. “He can’t feel his legs.”
“Oh, Milly.”
“He says he wishes he were in pain. He said it wouldn’t be so scary that way.” With that, Milly buried her face in her hands and sobbed. Jackie fought her own tears and pulled a handkerchief from the pocket of her skirt. She pressed it into Milly’s hands. Milly worked at controlling herself, but it took a moment. After that they sat in silence with their coffee, a bit uncomfortable, but not as strained as usual.
Addy and Elaine came down the stairs a little later. The girls heard them talking as they came.
“He hasn’t eaten for two days, but the doctor says to take it easy. No meat, and maybe a little bit of soup.”
“I’ll start that for you, Elaine,” Addy offered.
“Jackie put soup on,” Milly said, breaking into their conversation. Both women stopped and looked at Milly first and then Jackie. Jackie felt herself go red.
“It’s not very fancy.” Her hands moved nervously.
“Thank you, Jackie,” Elaine told her sincerely.
Jackie looked over to see her mother smiling. It was a proud smile, and once again Jackie fought her tears. She hadn’t felt this emotional since Eddie and Robert’s departure or Uncle Mitch’s death.
As soon as the Fontaine women were certain that everything was under control, they left. Addy explained to Jackie on the walk home that all they could do was wait. It was everyone’s prayer that Kevin would regain some sensation in his legs, but right now, they waited.
Jackie
fretted about how she could help, but almost of its own course, a pattern had been started. Jackie could be found at the Taggart home morning, noon, and evening. If she found dishes, she washed them. If coffee was needed, she made it, along with breakfast, lunch, or dinner. And when she wasn’t in the Taggart kitchen baking or cleaning, she was home in her own kitchen baking cookies or bread to take to them. If she arrived and there was nothing to be done, she left as quietly as she had come. The Taggart family rarely saw her, only evidence that she’d been there.
One evening, about ten days into this schedule, Jackie was still finishing up in the kitchen when Elaine and Clayton arrived on the scene. They’d both been upstairs, and Jackie was a bit flustered in Clayton’s presence. She was glad to be able to say she was on her way out the door.
“Please walk Jackie home, Clay,” Elaine said after she’d thanked the young woman.
“Oh, no,” Jackie protested softly. “I’ll be fine.”
But Clayton was already reaching for his hat, and Jackie did not want to make a scene. They walked silently out the front door. Jackie felt a little silly. It wasn’t even dark yet.
“There really isn’t a need, Clay. I know you want to be close to your family, and I can get home alone.”
Clayton suddenly stopped on the road, and Jackie stopped beside him. He looked down at her. Jackie wished she could read his thoughts.
“I haven’t thanked you,” he said with surprise.
“For what?”
“For all your help at the house.”
Embarrassed, Jackie shrugged and started to turn away. Clayton caught her arm. He held it for just a moment, and then let his hand drop. His eyes now lifted to the craggy, snow–topped mountains.
“I never dreamed of how it might feel to see my father laid up. I mean, he’s always been the strong one.” He looked back at Jackie. “My world has become that bedroom, Jackie. I sit in there most of the day, and when I go downstairs to my bedroom I think about being in there most of the night.”
Jackie saw for the first time how tired he looked.
“He teaches me so much. He may never walk again, but he still has a smile on his face and praise for God when he speaks. Do you know what he said to me last night?”