Sex Material

by Ashley, Victoria

  Her eyes scan mine for a moment, before she yanks me to her and kisses me hard on the lips. When she goes to pull away, I grab the back of her head before she can get too far. “How much is left at Douglas’? I want to be there for the next trip.”

  She shakes her head. “None. I don’t want anything that was ours. I want a fresh start that doesn’t remind me of the five-year mistake I made. I have my clothes and everything that is important to me and that’s all I need. Veronica has already offered to give me some things she doesn’t need for the kitchen. Everything else I can just buy along the way.”

  “Are those things packed?”

  She nods. “The box is sitting in her kitchen.”

  After pressing my lips to hers, I walk away to get the things she needs from next door. I want to help her get as settled in as we can right now, and since her bedroom set doesn’t arrive until tomorrow, unpacking the kitchen is a start.

  “I hate that you did this, Jensen. But…” Cami smiles at me from her new couch when I walk inside holding the box of kitchen utensils. “This couch is incredibly comfortable. Wow. It truly is amazing.” She runs her hands over the dark fabric as if she can’t get enough. “I’ll pay you back every cent. Even if you have to charge me extra for rent. I promise.”

  “You paying me back is the last thing I’m worried about, Cami. That shit isn’t happening until you’re all settled in and this house is completely furnished.” I set the box down on the kitchen island, before ripping the tape off. “Then we’ll discuss it.”

  She joins me in the kitchen and we both dig into the box to start putting things away. It feels natural to do this with her, and I’m not sure how to feel about that. It’s not like we’re going to live here together, but maybe in some fucked-up way I know I’ll be spending a lot of time here.

  “How was work?” she questions from the silverware drawer. “Busy day?”

  “Every day is a busy day. I can’t remember a day that I’ve been able to relax and just say fuck everything. But I wouldn’t have it any other way. Guys like me need the distraction.”

  “What do you mean guys like you? Good guys that go out of their way to help people? Because that’s what you did today.”

  My chest tightens. It’s been a long time since I’ve been referred to as a ‘good guy’. “I’m not all good, Cami.”

  “You’re not all bad, either.” She grabs the plate I’m about to put away from my hand, grabs my shirt, and pulls me to her. “Even if you want me to believe that. I can’t. It’s bullshit, Jensen. And you know it.”

  “Is it?” I ask stiffly. “What makes you so sure?”

  “I can feel it,” she whispers against my lips. “I feel it in my heart and soul every time you kiss me. Stop hiding from me, Jensen. Stop being afraid to break me. You’re not a monster.”

  My heart races from the way she’s looking at me, and before I stop myself, I’m yanking her to me so I can kiss her long and hard and claim her as mine.

  Fuck, I love kissing her.

  GOING TO DOUGLAS’ HOUSE TO grab the rest of my things yesterday was harder than expected. Not because I miss Douglas. That’s definitely not it. There’s not one thing I miss about that jerk.

  It just felt weird knowing that after living there with him for five years I’ll no longer be going back to that place. Not even to visit. It became familiar to me. It was my place of comfort, and now I have to start all over again somewhere new.

  If it wasn’t for Veronica being right next door, I’m not sure how long it would take me to get used to living in a new place, and alone on top of that. It’s going to be lonely at first, but I know with the help of my best friend and her husband I’ll get over it pretty quickly. She even offered to stay with me for the first few nights, but I told her no, because I don’t want to take her away from Peter. They’ve both done more than enough for me already.

  I owe them both so much. Even if it means cooking tacos for them every day for a whole year, I’ll do it.

  Stepping out back, I hurry toward my car, anxious to get to my new place and wait for my bedroom furniture to arrive. I know it won’t be there for a few more hours, but that doesn’t stop the excitement I feel at knowing that today is officially moving day. Jensen promised to be there with the contract, and even offered to help put the bedroom set together since the furniture store doesn’t offer assembly.

  “How about some ice cream?”

  My heart jumps when Jensen’s deep voice comes from out of nowhere. It’s not until I turn around that I realize while lost in thought, I walked right by Jensen’s truck. He’s standing there with his arms crossed and Benny at his side. They’re both looking at me as if they’re up to no good.

  “Ice cream?” I ask with a smile.

  “Yeah, Miss Reynolds. This new ice cream place is the best! Jensen took me there when it first opened. You have to come. You won’t regret it.”

  I cross my arms and focus my attention on Jensen, who now has a full-on grin on his face. “Is that right? I won’t regret it?”

  “You definitely won’t regret it. Especially since you get to go with us. We’ll make sure you pick out the right stuff.” He messes up Benny’s hair.

  “Hey!” Benny laughs and fixes his hair. “I worked hard on this style today. Just like how you taught me.”

  Jensen laughs and opens the backdoor of the truck for Benny to jump in, before opening the front door and nodding for me to join them. “Get in.”

  I uncross my arms and narrow my eyes at him. “Okay. But only because Benny asked,” I tease. “He’s too cute to refuse.”

  “Cuter than me?” Jensen questions, brow raised.

  “Yes. Even cuter than you.” I give his chest a light push and prepare to climb into the truck, but he grabs my waist and pulls me in for a kiss. My heart soars the moment his lips capture mine, and when he pulls away my legs feel shaky.

  “I’ve been waiting all day to do that. Now you can get in.”

  I can’t stop the smile on my face as I climb into the truck, and Jensen closes the door behind me. Things have changed between the two of us, and the more time we spend together, the more it starts to feel like we’re a real couple. I should be scared of getting my heart broken by him. Especially with the way he keeps saying he’s going to. Terrified in fact, but it’s not enough to keep me away. I’m drawn to Jensen unlike I’ve ever been to anyone else in the past. He somehow found a way to have me thinking about him from the very first day we met to now, no matter how hard I tried not to. And boy did I try.

  The ice cream place is only a few blocks away, so within minutes we pull up and Benny jumps out in a rush, yelling for us to hurry as he runs toward the door. With a carefree smile, Jensen grabs my hand and guides me across the lot with him.

  “About time. Jeez! All the good stuff is going to be gone soon.” Benny uncrosses his arms when we finally make it to him, which is only seconds later, but he makes it seem like it’s minutes. “Come on. Let’s go!”

  Jensen shakes his head and opens the door for us. “You better save me some brownies this time, Benny. Don’t be stingy this time.”

  “Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.” Benny is at the counter ordering his ice cream before the door even has a chance to close behind us.

  We all order the same thing and spend the next twenty minutes or so laughing and joking around while we eat it. Seeing the way Jensen is with Benny only has me falling deeper for him. Seeing this side of him is truly a beautiful thing, and the fact he is letting me see the two of them together is huge for both of us.

  “…heck yeah. I kick butt at that game,” Benny brags with excitement when Jensen mentions a videogame he bought for Benny a while back. “Grams let me play it the other night and I won three out of four times. You should’ve been there to see it.”

  “I’ll see what I can do next week. Maybe Grams will let you come to my place for the weekend and you can teach me how to play. How does that sound?”

  “That would be so awesome!” Benny
high fives Jensen from across the table before turning to me. “Are you good at basketball, Miss Reynolds? I don’t know if girls are any good or not. I’ve never seen one play before.”

  I laugh and shake my head. “I can’t say that I am. But maybe I’ll have to learn someday. Some girls are good at it, though.”

  “I can teach you like Jensen taught me!” Benny jumps up and starts pretending like he’s dribbling a basketball before throwing it into an invisible hoop. “Nothing but net.”

  “Don’t be a show off,” Jensen teases. “Or I’ll eat the rest of your ice cream.”

  Benny quickly sits down and grabs his bowl, pulling it to him. “I don’t think so. I’ve been waiting all week for ice cream. I’ll show off some other time.”

  I can’t help but smile at Benny and Jensen as they continue to joke with each other. A smile hasn’t left Benny’s face the entire time, until Jensen pulls up to his Grams’ house to drop him off. It’s easy to see the disappointment on both of their faces when Benny climbs out and walks to meet his Grams in the driveway.

  Jensen is silent for a while after dropping Benny off, so I don’t question him when he heads to the house instead of back to the school where my car is.

  “Benny is a great kid,” I say when we get to the porch. “You’re good with him. Really good, in fact.”

  He nods and pulls a key from his pocket, handing it to me. “This is yours. I have duplicates inside on the kitchen island.” He crosses his arms and smiles when I do. “Congratulations. You’re officially fucking your landlord. How does it feel?”

  His words cause a surge of heat through my body, but I do my best to play it off. The thought may have me wet, but he doesn’t need to know. “Not as hot as I thought it would, to be honest.”

  “Fuck that.” He pushes me through the door and slams it shut behind us. “Don’t make me have to remind you just how fucking hot it is, Cami. I don’t give two shits that your bedroom furniture is arriving any minute now. I’ll remind you right here against this fucking door if I have to.”

  My face breaks into a smile and he flexes his jaw, clearly annoyed that I’m pretending sex with him isn’t the hottest thing I’ve done in my entire existence. “You’re not officially my landlord until I sign the contract. Maybe it’ll be hotter once that happens.”

  “Fuck, Cami. Sign it and let’s find out.” He grunts and heads to the kitchen as if he’s in a hurry to test the theory. Right when he grabs the pen to hand it to me, the doorbell rings. “Son of a bitch.” He pushes down on his erection, before adjusting it and gripping the counter in annoyance. “Answer the door.”

  With a laugh, I answer the door and stand back as Jensen shows them where everything goes, as if he’s going to be living here too. It makes me feel safer for a moment, until I realize that tonight will be my first night alone in this big house.

  “This is going to take hours for me to put together,” he says, once we’re alone and standing in the master bedroom. I hope you’re ready for a late night. I might not be leaving here for a while.”

  “I’m okay with that,” I admit. “I’d rather you didn’t anyway.” It’s true. I sort of want him to stay. Until it’s time to go to bed anyway. “I’m going to run next door and see if Veronica wants to have some wine and help me unpack. Be right back.”

  I hurry and take off, so I don’t have to see the look on his face at me wanting him to stay. I don’t know how he feels about that and I’m not sure I want to know. I just want to pretend that he wants to be here as much as I want him to be.

  All it takes for Veronica to agree to help is a bottle of wine and two clean glasses to drink them from. “You’re lucky you’re my best friend and you have wine. Lots of fucking wine. Holy shit, you alcoholic. Ten bottles?”

  “I didn’t buy them,” I answer above my glass. “Jensen did.”

  “Well, damn. He asked me what kind of wine you liked. I didn’t expect him to buy you the whole damn case.” She pokes her head out of the walk-in closet, most likely to see if Jensen is listening, before she turns back to me. “He seriously let you paint the bedroom the color you wanted? I’m so damn jealous. I wanted to paint ours maroon and he flat out told me no. Jerk.”

  “Then paint it maroon,” Jensen says from outside the door. “And yes, I can hear every fucking word you two say in that closet. It’s not sound proof and you’ve already finished off a bottle of wine. You’re not whispering anymore. More like shouting about my dick and how good I fuck Cami. I heard that shit too.”

  “Well, shit.” Veronica rolls her eyes, while pouring another glass. “I seem to forget how to be quiet after a few glasses. I need to remember that.”

  We both burst out in laughter when Jensen pokes his head into the closet with a cocky grin. We’re both buzzing and enjoying ourselves, and for once he seems to be enjoying himself too, even though he’s been stuck putting my bed together for the last hour.

  “Bed is put together. I’ll put the drawers in the dresser and nightstand after a cigarette break. Try not to talk too much about my amazing sex skills when I’m not around to listen. Got it?” With his eyes on me, he pulls out a cigarette and places it between his perfect lips. I can’t pull my eyes away until he finally walks away.

  “Holy shit, Cami. You have it bad for him, don’t you?” She sits straight up on her knees, as if she has to get higher to say this next part. “And he totally has it bad for you. Look what he’s done for you. He doesn’t do things like this for anyone. Not anymore anyway.”

  “Not since Katherine?”

  Veronica clears her throat, before standing to her feet. “Yeah. Has he told you about her yet?”

  “No. It’s like he doesn’t want to talk about her. I just don’t understand what could be so bad. I mean he’s still there for her kid even though she doesn’t seem to be around. Clearly, she’s the bad guy, right?”

  Veronica’s face turns white and my heart drops. “You need to ask him about her again. You have the right to know what happened, but it’s not my story to tell, Cami. Make sure he tells you before you get in too deep with him. I’m not saying he’s a bad guy, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t think differently. That can keep him from being a good one. Just… just talk to him. Okay?”

  “Okay… I’m really nervous now. Should I be nervous?” I stand up and grab the wine from her hand when she hands it to me.

  “I don’t know, Cami. But I think I should go. I’m suddenly feeling queasy.”

  I feel queasy myself the moment I’m standing alone in my new closet. The one I was very much enjoying before the conversation I just had.

  “Everything good?” I look over to Jensen standing in front of me now. “I ordered a pizza. Hope you like pepperoni.”

  “I do.” I force a smile and tell myself to forget about what Veronica said for the night. Jensen has worked his ass off for me today, and I don’t want to ruin the night by forcing him to talk about his ex. “It’s my favorite.”

  By the time the pizza arrives everything is together and put away. Veronica and Peter said I could borrow the TV they had in their guest room until I can pick one out, so Jensen hooked it up and I connected it to Veronica’s Wi-Fi, so I at least have Netflix to keep me entertained until I can set up cable service.

  We’re in the middle of eating pizza and watching TV when Jensen pulls out the contract for me to sign. “Here’s what you’ve been waiting for.”

  I sign it and push it back to him, excitement filling me. “Looks like you’re finally my landlord.”

  “Maybe I want to be more,” he says, surprising me. “But I need to know what you want, Cami. I need to know that you can handle it if things get ugly and don’t work out. I can’t…” He exhales and runs a hand through his hair. “I just need to know that I won’t break you.”

  “You won’t,” I say without thinking. “I won’t let you.” I say it, hoping to believe it myself, but I’m not very convinced. “All I know is that I want you too, Jensen.”

 
“Good. I was hoping you’d say that.” He pulls me into his lap and pulls the blanket that I borrowed from Veronica’s guest bed down on top of us. Tomorrow I plan on shopping for a few things. Like I told Jensen, I didn’t want anything I shared with Douglas. Blankets included.

  I don’t know when it happened or how, but next thing I know I’m falling asleep beside him, and the last thing I remember before everything goes black is how good and safe it feels being in his strong arms.

  WAKING UP BESIDE CAMI FEELS so much better than I imagined. I never planned to spend the night last night with her, but knowing it was going to be Cami’s first night alone in a big house, the thought of her sleeping alone bothered me.

  I had this need to protect her and make her feel safe. It’s a feeling I haven’t had with a woman in a long time, and one I was afraid I’d never have again. But Cami is different. Fuck, how she is different. She has me feeling alive again. It’s terrifying, yet something I want more of. So much fucking more.

  “You stayed the whole night?” Cami sits up and tiredly looks around. “When did we get to my bed?”

  “About three in the morning. I thought you’d be more comfortable here.” I climb out of her bed and grab for my jeans. “Want some breakfast? I have to run to the office real fast. I can drop some off afterward.”

  She shakes her head and joins me beside the bed, wrapping her arms around my waist. “Or you can just grab some on your way back here? I’d rather eat breakfast with you, Jensen. Unless you’re busy.”

  I had a whole day of work planned, and skipping out on it isn’t something I usually do, but when she looks at me the way she is right now, like she wants me around, my fucking chest aches at the thought of leaving.

  “I don’t have shit to do. Not shit that can’t wait, at least.” I cup her cheeks and pull her in for a kiss, feeling the need to kiss her. I’ve been feeling it a lot lately I’m learning. “What are you in the mood for… other than me?”