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by Linda Kay Klein


  Fitzgerald, Francis. The Evangelicals: The Struggle to Shape America. New York: Simon & Schuster, 2017.

  France, R. T. The Gospel of Matthew, NICNT. Grand Rapids, MI: Eerdmans, 2007.

  Freitas, Donna. Sex and the Soul: Juggling Sexuality, Spirituality, Romance, and Religion on America’s College Campuses. New York: Oxford University Press, 2008.

  Freud, Sigmund. Totem and Taboo: Resemblances Between the Psychic Lives of Savages and Neurotics. Translated by A. A. Brill. New York: Moffat, Yard and Company, 1918.

  Giesbrecht, N., and I. Sevcik. “The Process of Recovery and Rebuilding Among Abused Women in the Conservative Evangelical Subculture.” Springer Journal of Family Violence 15, no. 3 (2000): 229–241. https://doi.org/10.1023/A:1007549401830.

  Gleeson, Hayley. “#ChurchToo: Christian Victims of Abuse Join Social Media Outpouring.” Australian Broadcasting Corporation News, November 23, 2017. http://www.abc.net.au/news/2017-11-24/church-too-christian-victims-of-abuse-join-social-media-twitter/9188666?pfmredir=sm.

  Goldstein, Valerie Saiving. “The Human Situation: A Feminine View.” The Journal of Religion 40, no. 2 (1960): 100–112. http://www.jstor.org/stable/1200194.

  Haffner, Debra W., and Kate M. Ott. A Time to Speak: Faith Communities and Sexuality Education, Third Edition. Bridgeport, CT: Religious Institute, 2011.

  Harris, Joshua (@HarrisJosh). “@elizabethesther I’m sorry. And I’m planning to dig into that in the next year or two. Again, I’d love to chat.” Twitter, May 10, 2016. https://twitter.com/search?f=tweets&q=I’m%20sorry.%20And%20I’m%20planning%20to%20dig%20into%20that%20in%20the%20next%20year%20or%20two.%20Again%2C%20I’d%20love%20to%20chat&src=typd.

  ———. “@jessicakathryn @elizabethesther Sorry about that, Jess.” Twitter, May 10, 2016. https://twitter.com/search?f=tweets&q=%40HarrisJosh%20Sorry%20about%20that%2C%20Jess&src=typd.

  ———. “Kristine, I don’t know what to say. I’m sorry for the loss you’ve experienced and ways my book contributed.” Twitter, May 17, 2016. https://twitter.com/search?f=tweets&q=Kristine%2C%20I%20don’t%20know%20what%20to%20say.%20I’m%20sorry%20for%20the%20loss%20you’ve%20experienced%20and%20ways%20my%20book%20contributed&src=typd.

  Harris, Joshua. “Feedback List.” Accessed July 27, 2016. http://joshharris.com/feedback-list/?pagenum=11&sort=date_created&dir=DESC.

  ———. Sex Is Not the Problem (Lust Is): Sexual Purity in a Lust-Saturated World. Sisters, OR: Multnomah Publishers, 2003.

  Hill, Zahara. “A Black Woman Created the ‘Me Too’ Campaign Against Sexual Assault 10 Years Ago.” Ebony, October 18, 2017. http://www.ebony.com/news-views/black-woman-me-too-movement-tarana-burke-alyssa-milano#axzz53R5Ng574.

  Hooker, Rachel (@tangleknits). “Pastor to husband: ‘May Igive her a hug?’ ” Twitter, April 20, 2017. https://twitter.com/tangleknits/status/855114214742020096?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.huffingtonpost.com%2Fentry%2Fchristian-women-on-twitter-unload-about-misogyny-in-the-church_us_58f8f71ce4b018a9ce592e05.

  Hope, Lana (@wideopenground). “@HarrisJosh @jessicakathryn @elizabethesther This tweet made me cry. Had to see if I read that right. Thank you.” Twitter, May 11, 2016. https://twitter.com/search?f=tweets&q=This%20tweet%20made%20me%20cry.%20Had%20to%20see%20if%20I%20read%20that%20right.%20Thank%20you&src=typd.

  Ingersoll, Julie. Evangelical Christian Women: War Stories in the Gender Battles. New York: New York University Press, 2003.

  Jessica (@jessicakathryn). “@elizabethesther my school wasn’t allowed to have prom. Because @HarrisJosh lol.” Twitter, May 10, 2016. https://twitter.com/search?f=tweets&q=%40jessicakathryn%20Because%20%40HarrisJosh&src=typd.

  Journey Free. “Religious Trauma Syndrome.” Accessed January 11, 2018. http://journeyfree.org/rts/.

  Kahn, Azmat. “What’s Behind ‘Rape Culture’ on Campus?” Al Jazeera, October 30 2013. http://america.aljazeera.com/watch/shows/america-tonight/america-tonight-blog/2013/10/30/what-will-changetherapecultureoncampuses.html/.

  Kirby, Douglas. Emerging Answers 2007: Research Findings on Programs to Reduce Teen Pregnancy and Sexually Transmitted Diseases. Washington, DC: The National Campaign to Prevent Teen Pregnancy, 2007.

  Kreuz, Greta. “Sovereign Grace Ministries, Class-Action Civil Lawsuit Involving Child Sex Abuse.” WJLA News, July 10, 2015. http://wjla.com/news/crime/sovereign-grace-ministries-class-action-civil-lawsuit-involving-child-sex-abuse-88894.

  Kruszelnicki, Kristine (@kruszer). “Add me to ur IKDG victims. 37, never married, now infertile. Set bar too high cause of ur book. Many regrets! @elizabethesther.” Twitter, May 17, 2016. https://twitter.com/search?f=tweets&q=Add%20me%20to%20ur%20IKDG%20victims.%2037%2C%20never%20married%2C%20now%20infertile&src=typd.

  LaHaye, Tim and Beverly LaHaye. The Act of Marriage: A Christian Guide to Sexual Love. Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 1976.

  Larson, Sarah. “ ‘Spotlight’ and Its Revelations.” The New Yorker, December 8, 2015. http://www.newyorker.com/culture/sarah-larson/spotlight-and-its-revelations.

  Lee, John. “Minister Allegedly Enticed Child, 12.” Post Crescent, June 9, 1997.

  Lenz, Lyz. “Recovering From I Kissed Dating Goodbye: A Roundtable.” The Toast, June 8, 2016. http://the-toast.net/2016/06/08/recovering-from-i-kissed-dating-goodbye-a-roundtable/.

  LifeWay. “History of True Love Waits.” Accessed August 4, 2017. http://www.lifeway.com/History/True-Love-Waits/c/N-1z0zq7rZ1z13wiu?intcmp=TLWMain-Hero-History-20131216.

  Lybeck, Jennette, and Cynthia J. Neal. “Do Religious Institutions Resist or Support Women’s ‘Lost Voice?’ ” Youth & Society 27, no. 1 (September 1995): 13–21.

  Malone, Luke. “Virginity’s Unwitting Casualties.” The Sydney Morning Herald, May 25, 2012. http://www.smh.com.au/lifestyle/life/virginitys-unwitting-casualties-20120525-1z8ti.html.

  Marcus, Lilit. “Josh Duggar and the Sexual Abuse Allegations Rocking 19 Kids and Counting.” The Guardian, May 22, 2015. https://www.theguardian.com/tv-and-radio/2015/may/22/josh-duggar-sexual-abuse-19-kids-counting-tlc.

  Milwaukee Journal Sentinel. “Youth Minister Charged with Child Enticement.” June 10, 1997.

  Moslener, Sara. “Don’t Act Now! Selling Christian Abstinence in the Religious Marketplace.” In God in the Details: American Religion in Popular Culture, Second Edition. Edited by Eric Michael Mazur and Kate McCarthy. London: Routledge, 2011.

  ———. Personal Interview. Conducted August 25, 2017.

  ———. Virgin Nation: Sexual Purity and American Adolescence. New York: Oxford University Press, 2015.

  Otto, Rudolph. The Idea of the Holy. Translated by John W. Harvey. London: Oxford University Press, 1923.

  Pagitt, Doug. Personal Interview. Conducted June 21, 2016.

  Parker, Rebecca Ann. “Prelude.” In Proverbs of Ashes: Violence, Redemptive Suffering, and the Search for What Saves Us. Rita Nakashima Brock and Rebecca Ann Parker. Boston, MA: Beacon Press, 2001.

  Pew Research Center’s Religion & Public Life Project. “Religious Landscape Study.” May 11, 2015. http://www.pewforum.org/religious-landscape-study/.

  RAINN. “Perpetrators of Sexual Violence: Statistics.” Accessed October 26, 2017. https://www.rainn.org/statistics/perpetrators-sexual-violence.

  ———. “Scope of the Problem: Statistics.” Accessed October 26, 2017. https://www.rainn.org/statistics/scope-problem.

  Regnerus, Mark. Forbidden Fruit: Sex & Religion in the Lives of American Teenagers. Oxford: Oxford University Press, 2007.

  Rich, Phil. “Recognizing Healthy & Unhealthy Sexual Development in Children.” MN Adopt. Accessed October 29, 2017. https://www.mnadopt.org/wp-content/uploads/2014/03/Recognizing-Healthy-Unhealthy-Sexual-Development-in-Children.pdf.

  Rowling, J. K. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. New York: Scholastic, 2000.

  Ryan, Richard M., and Edward L. Deci. “Self-Determination Theory and the Facilitation of Intrinsic Motivation, Social Development, and Well-Being.” American Psychologist 55, no.1 (January 2000): 73.

 
; Sales, Nancy Jo. American Girls: Social Media and the Secret Lives of Teenagers. New York: Alfred A. Knopf, 2016.

  Schermer Sellers, Tina. “A Biblical Scholar and Clinical Sexologist Debate Christian Sexual Purity.” June 22, 2012. Accessed October 31, 2017. http://tinaschermersellers.com/2012/06/22/a-biblical-scholar-and-clinical-sexologist-debate-christian-sexual-purity/.

  ———. Personal Interview. Conducted August 10, 2016.

  Sexuality Information and Education Council of the United States. “A History of Federal Funding for Abstinence-Only-Until-Marriage Funding FY 10.” Accessed August 5, 2017. http://www.siecus.org/index.cfm?fuseaction=page.viewpage&pageid=1340&nodeid=1.

  ———. “Curriculum Review: Choosing the Best SOUL MATE.” 2008. http://www.communityactionkit.org/index.cfm?fuseaction=Page.ViewPage&PageID=1184&stopRedirect=1.

  ———. “Dedicated Federal Abstinence-Only-Until-Marriage Programs.” May 2017. Accessed August 5, 2017. http://www.siecus.org/index.cfm?fuseaction=document.viewDocument&documentid=663&documentFormatId=772&vDocLinkOrigin=1&CFID=12509806&CFTOKEN=4418cba96dc27fc-FE7F5F9E-1C23-C8EB-80A628AD05F95DE2.

  Silver Ring Thing. “Silver Ring Thing.” Accessed August 4, 2017. https://www.silverringthing.com.

  Smart, Elizabeth. “Child Trafficking Symposium: Elizabeth Smart.” Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health video, 13:26, September 10, 2014. https://www.jhsph.edu/research/centers-and-institutes/moore-center-for-the-prevention-of-child-sexual-abuse/news/symposium-on-meeting-needs-of-child-trafficking-survivors/child-trafficking-symposium-elizabeth-smart1.

  Smith, Christian, and Lisa Pearce. National Study of Youth and Religion, 2002–2003. Chapel Hill, NC: University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, 2003.

  Tennant, Agnieszka. “Dating Jesus: When ‘Lover of My Soul’ Language Goes Too Far.” Christianity Today, December 6, 2006. http://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2006/december/17.56.html.

  The Flawless Project. “About the Flawless Project.” Accessed October 29, 2017. http://theflawlessproject.org/about/.

  Thompson, Curt. The Soul of Shame: Retelling the Stories We Believe About Ourselves. Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press, 2015.

  Traister, Rebecca. “The Single American Woman.” New York Magazine, February 2016. http://nymag.com/thecut/2016/02/political-power-single-women-c-v-r.html#.

  Trenholm, Christopher. Impacts of Four Title V, Section 510 Abstinence Education Programs: Final Report. Princeton, NJ: Mathematica Policy Research, 2007.

  US Census Bureau. Annual Estimates of the Resident Population for Selected Age Groups by Sex for the United States, States, Counties, and Puerto Rico Commonwealth and Municipios: April 1, 2010 to July 1, 2015. Retrieved October 26, 2017. factfinder.census.gov/bkmk/table/1.0/en/PEP/2015/PEPAGESEX?slice=GEO~0100000US.

  US Department of Health and Human Services. Impacts of Four Title V, Section 510 Abstinence Education Programs, April 2007.

  US Department of Justice, Office of Justice Programs, Bureau of Justice Statistics. Female Victims of Sexual Violence, 1994–2010, 2013.

  ———. National Crime Victimization Survey: 2010–2014, 2015.

  ———. Sexual Assault of Young Children as Reported to Law Enforcement, 2000.

  US House of Representatives, Committee on Government Reform, Minority Staff Special Investigations Division. The Content of Federally Funded Abstinence Education Programs: Prepared for Rep. Henry A Waxman, December 2004. http://spot.colorado.edu/~tooley/HenryWaxman.pdf.

  Valenti, Jessica. The Purity Myth: How America’s Obsession with Virginity Is Hurting Young Women. Berkeley, CA: Seal Press, 2009.

  Wheeler, Barbara G. “You Who Were Far Off: Religious Divisions and the Role of Religious Research.” Review of Religious Research 37, no. 4 (1996): 289–301. doi:10.2307/3512010.

  Williams, Layton E. “Who Owns a Pastor’s Body: The Roots of Inappropriate Comments and Congregational Entitlement.” Sojourners Online, May 3, 2016. Accessed October 29, 2017. https://sojo.net/articles/who-owns-pastor-s-body.

  Williams, Paula S. “A Touchstone for Sexual Health.” Highlands Church Denver. Recording audio. April 17, 2016. http://highlandschurchdenver.org/audio-items/a-touchstone-for-sexual-health-paula-s-williams/.

  Wilson, Pamela M. Our Whole Lives, Grades 7–9, 2nd Edition. Boston, MA: UUA, 2014.

  Winell, Marlene. Personal Interview. Conducted November 10, 2015.

  Wuthnow, Robert. After the Baby Boomers: How Twenty- and Thirty-Somethings Are Shaping the Future of American Religion. Princeton, NJ: Princeton University Press, 2007.

  Zacharek, Stephanie, Eliana Dockterman, and Haley Sweetland Edwards. “2017 Person of the Year: The Silence Breakers.” Time Magazine, December 18, 2017. http://time.com/time-person-of-the-year-2017-silence-breakers/.

  Permissions

  Excerpts from I Thought It Was Just Me (But It Isn’t): Making the Journey from “What Will People Think?” to “I Am Enough” by Brené Brown. Copyright © 2007 by Brené Brown. Used by permission of Gotham Books, an imprint of Penguin Publishing Group, a division of Penguin Random House LLC. All rights reserved. Any third party use of this material, outside of this publication, is prohibited. Interested parties must apply directly to Penguin Random House LLC for permission.

  Excerpts from “Confronting Campus Rape” by Nina Burleigh. Copyright © and Trademark ® Rolling Stone LLC. All rights reserved. Used by permission.

  Excerpts from “The Ten Commandments” by David Ellis Dickerson. Copyright © This American Life, PBC. Used by permission.

  Excerpt from The Brain That Changes Itself: Stories of Personal Triumph from the Frontiers of Brain Science by Norman Doidge. Copyright © 2007 by Norman Doidge. Used by permission of Viking Books, an imprint of Penguin Publishing Group, a division of Penguin Random House LLC. All rights reserved. Any third party use of this material, outside of this publication, is prohibited. Interested parties must apply directly to Penguin Random House LLC for permission.

  Excerpts from Sex and the Soul: Juggling Sexuality, Spirituality, Romance, and Religion on America’s College Campuses by Donna Freitas (2008) 200w from pp. 80, 84. By permission of Oxford University Press, USA.

  Excerpts from “The Process of Recovery and Rebuilding Among Abused Women in the Conservative Evangelical Subculture” by N. Giesbrecht and I. Sevcik. Copyright © 2000 by Plenum Publishing Corporation. Used by permission of Springer Nature.

  Excerpts from Evangelical Christian Women: War Stories in the Gender Battles by Julie Ingersoll. Copyright © 2003 by NYU Press. Used by permission.

  Excerpts from The Act of Marriage: A Christian Guide to Sexual Love by Tim and Beverly LaHaye. Copyright © 1976. Used by permission of Zondervan. www.zondervan.com.

  Excerpt from “ ‘Spotlight’ and Its Revelations” by Sarah Larson. The New Yorker Copyright © Condé Nast. Used by permission.

  Excerpts from Forbidden Fruit: Sex & Religion in the Lives of American Teenagers by Mark Regnerus (2007) 588w from pp. 12, 57, 63, 73, 107, 153. Copyright © 2006, Oxford University Press, Inc. Used by permission of Oxford University Press, USA.

  Excerpt from Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire by J. K. Rowling. Copyright © 2000 by J. K. Rowling. Used by permission.

  Excerpt from “Dating Jesus: When ‘Lover of my Soul’ Language Goes Too Far” by Agnieszka Tennant. Copyright © Agnieszka Tennant. Used by permission.

  Excerpts from The Soul of Shame: Retelling the Stories We Believe About Ourselves by Curt Thompson. Copyright © 2015 by Curt Thompson. Used by permission of InterVarsity Press, P.O. Box 1400, Downers Grove, IL 60515, USA. www.ivpress.com.

  Excerpts from The Purity Myth: How America’s Obsession with Virginity Is Hurting Young Women by Jessica Valenti. Copyright © 2009. Reprinted by permission of Seal Press, an imprint of Hachette Book Group, Inc.

  Excerpt from “Who Owns a Pastor’s Body: The Roots of Inappropriate Comments and Congregational Entitlement” by Layton E. Williams. Copyright © Sojourners Online. Used with permission.

  Por
tions of chapters 1, 5, and 16 were originally published in the Our Inner Lives division of Feminist.com.

  Index

  A note about the index: The pages referenced in this index refer to the page numbers in the print edition. Clicking on a page number will take you to the ebook location that corresponds to the beginning of that page in the print edition. For a comprehensive list of locations of any word or phrase, use your reading system’s search function.

  A

  abstinence-only education, 8–10, 21–22, 25, 76, 276n, 278

  failure of, 25–26, 27, 195n, 278

  federal funds for, 22, 22n, 26

  Abstinence Study Bible, 23

  Act of Marriage, The (LaHaye and LaHaye), 135, 137–39, 137n

  Acts 29 Network, 19

  addictions and substance abuse, 172, 211

  Adolescent Family Life Act (AFLA), 22n

  AIDS epidemic, 22

  altar call, 18, 18n, 38, 58, 280

  Anti-Christ, 63–64

  anxiety

  anxiety disorders, 171, 219

  church’s messages on gender and sexuality and, 7, 33, 183–84, 186, 187–88, 191–92

  panic attacks and, 169–70, 177–78, 218–19, 240

  panic attacks and sexual activity, 197

  Assemblies of God churches, 19

  Aune, Kristin, 116

  B

  Bakker, Jay, 156

  Bakker, Jim and Tammy Faye, 156

  Bar Church (experimental church), 155–56

  Bible

  literal interpretation of, 162

  reading of, 39

  on sin, 158

  stumbling blocks and, 3, 29–30

  See also specific passages

  Bible Institute of Los Angeles (Biola), 104

  Bible study, 6, 39, 145, 164, 271

  Bob Jones University, 281, 281n

  body shame, 4, 8, 91–92, 153, 217, 234, 235

  embodiment gratitude practice, 289–90

 

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