Three Times Torn

by Felisha Antonette

  I’m sorry. You can leave, but I can’t leave her. I saw her and the attraction I had toward this woman was undeniable. Her heart became mine. She’s my beautiful creature. I won’t let her stay prisoner here. We can’t leave her.

  Fuck. She’s your mate. Our heads fall with realization coming over us.

  She is. I need her. We see the desperation in his eyes. The plea for us to not walk away but help him rescue his mate too.

  Do you know where she is? we ask.

  Yes.

  Throwing our left arm out, we edgily instruct, Lead the way.

  Olar runs to our left, and we follow him down the celled wall.

  Where are we going? Scott barks.

  To find Olar’s mate, we answer.

  He mated with someone in here? How the hell is that even possible?

  Not now, Scott, we fire back.

  Crowded by the double flow of irritation, my hands shake. I grab Nathan’s hand, and I’m able to feel my hand through his touch. Washed in confidence, I push forward, sure we have everything under control.

  We come upon an empty, open cell. A small hole sits in its back wall. We crawl through it, making it to a cramped space with a hatch Olar pulls back. We drop down, barging into a small room that only holds a bed. A thin girl jumps up from it. At first, she looks afraid, then shows excitement when her sight rests on Olar. They kiss and then she nods. She pulls a ladder down from the hatch, and we climb it out of the room. First Olar and Lana.

  Going back the way we came, we go as fast as we can, bursting from the crawl space, fleeing from the cell, racing across the floor with the brown, wooden door in sight.

  Scott! Glen’s voice shrills in our mind.

  We skid to a stop, twisting around.

  Three bulky men stand before us. The one in the middle has his arm wrapped around Glen’s neck, holding her hostage. Terror spills tears from her eyes and reddens her cheeks.

  “Kegic, let her go,” Olar demands.

  Scott’s shaking next to Nathan, morphing and changing color.

  “If he takes one step, I will drop her,” Kegic warns, gesturing toward Scott. “You’re surrounded.”

  We don’t tear our eyes away to check our surroundings. Chewing on her lip, Glen squints her eyes as her brows draw in tight. Her begs loud but she’s learned to stay quiet. Her gaze never breaks away from Scott’s. With trembling lips, she mouths, Please. Scott steps forward. . .

  My life moves in slow motion.

  Before a thought can process, before we can take our next breath before we can blink.

  Fast as a strike of lightning, Kegic reaches his free hand to the top of Glen’s head and then yanks it away, taking the top of her head and brain with it. Her eyes roll to the back of her head at the removal, and I watch my best friend slowly drop to the floor—lifeless.

  I’m numb. I turn to my right, looking past Nathan to Scott. Disbelief sears his face as his pupils and irises cloud with a darkness that empties me. He pales, dropping to his knees, and falls over on his shoulder.

  The world sucks the air from my body. My agony fights against my focus on Nathan. He grabs my hand, and my attention redirects back to Kegic, who’s smiling at us. Who took the life of my friends in less than a second.

  “Are you trying to escape—” He evaporates. No ash.

  The other two charge. I dust one and Nathan vaporizes the other.

  The room’s silent as we turn back around to make a run for it. Three men rush through the door we need to leave through.

  “I have them, you two keep running,” Olar yells. The three guys drop down, clawing at their head, and ripping out their hair.

  We rush through the rooms to the dark hall. I carefully but quickly lead us back through, out of the steel door. We round the corner, fence in sight. I’m stumbling, unable to keep up. Nathan’s car has reappeared, and the moment we make it to the sidewalk, I’m dropping to my knees, choking.

  I can’t. . . I can’t hold it in. Nathan lifts me from the ground, pulling me with him into the backseat. He separates himself from me, and I feel every inch of my chest cave in, my heartbreak, my lungs constrict. The scene replays over and over and over again.

  “Not yet, Sparks.” Nathan grabs my hand, pushing calm through me that doesn’t do it.

  The feelings fight against each other, and I grit my teeth, trying to manage.

  Hold on, Sparks. I know. Just hold on. He pulls me to lay my head in his lap, and I black out.

  I PEEL MY EYES open, peering into the night. I breathe deeply. Phlegm forces a cough. It’s then I remember.

  Screaming at the top of my lungs, I drown in an unbearable sorrow. A sorrow of which I try to relieve myself by my cry.

  Nathan pulls me onto him as he sits up, holding my head in his neck. He squeezes me tight, trying to suppress the crowding hurt, the staggering stab of loss. Burying his head in my neck, he breathes, breaths warm and heavy as he cries.

  My moans are muffled against his skin, and I wish the boa-constricting grip I have on him—he has on me—did something for this sting.

  Like this. We sit for hours. It never lifts. We don’t break apart but break more and more.

  Eventually, he lays us down. Our collars of our shirts are wet. My nose and lips are raw. My throat and eyes are sore.

  Her voice is a whistle in my ears. Her laugh, a croon to my soul. I shiver when I see her as a movie in my mind, a time when we were kids, and she passed me her pink princess eraser to the hug we shared before leaving this afternoon. My best friend, happy only hours ago, now a memory. The things I’ll never get to enjoy with her again, gone. I cry until I’m drained, and my drying sobs echo against my human wall.

  Nathan’s hard as a brick, jaw tight, and still as stone, never removing his arm from being thrown over his eyes. When he loosens, a soft sob escapes him, and that worsens my pain. Scott was to him as Glen was to me. Reminded of that, the role Scott played in both our lives, my tears return and I cry myself to sleep.

  I wake, later, to a sleeping Nathan. Discomfort rested heavily on his face. I kiss the corner of his mouth twice. The apparent distress in his sleeping expression lessens, being replaced by tranquility. I kiss him again. “Nate?” His brows twitch. I kiss him again. “Nathan?”

  His eyes open to thin slits. “You’re right, that is a good way to wake up,” he says, deep and sleepily.

  “Can we take a walk? I can’t lay here awake on my own.” And my thoughts and this misery. . .

  Black eyes meet mine. “Yes.”

  I get up, going to the closet. Blocking out the memories, I change my clothes, feeling weary. Nathan comes in behind me and changes too. We slide on our running shoes and leave the house, passing Olar and his new mate sitting in the gazebo. I grab Nathan’s hand as we stroll to our usual walking path. The breeze cools the settled heat that’s made my body a discomfort for the last few hours. The air smells of arriving summer, and the relief I hoped to feel is short.

  Nathan pulls me to his front and rests his head on mine. I tilt my head back and kiss the bottom of his chin. “Thank you, Sparks.” He exhales, straitening.

  I rub his arms. “Thank you, Nate.”

  We stride, trying to ease off today. I rest my head on his shoulder, wanting a relief greater than the graze of his hand.

  Stopping, he twists me around and hugs me to him. I sigh, returning it. We’re both needing each other. Beyond the extra ability to physically comfort one another, but to just be here and be held. Pulling back a little, he lifts my chin. “I’m sorry, Tracey. I let you down.”

  Looking into black, non-swirling eyes, I assure, “It’s not your fault, Nate. Don’t apologize. Neither of us knew it was going to happen.” A pool of tears forms on my bottom lids. He touches my cheek, sucking away the pain. I clear the growing lump from my throat. “I appreciate that,” I gurgle, and clear my throat again.

  “I can’t take it.”

  “I know.” Needing the high, I pull him down, and press my lips to his.
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  His caress is gentle, requesting my comfort.

  “Nate, I don’t like you kissing my woman like this.” My hand heats at the sound of Roehl’s voice. He’s with two other men taller than him.

  “Now is not a good time,” Nathan snarls in a low, venomous voice, taking on his demon. My head tilts back, watching him grow larger than his previous size.

  Roehl’s eyes widen then he squints. Sobering, he cajoles, “Tracey, I’ve come to take you home.” The whimsical tone of his voice lightens my mood. “I love you, and I need you at my side, Cey.”

  A smile tickles my cheeks as his bright eyes capture me. Letting go of Nathan, I leave for Roehl. Nathan snatches me by the crux of my arm.

  “Let her choose, Nate. Not like you can do anything to me based on her choice.”

  I remove my hand from Nathan’s again and regain the step I’d taken.

  Roehl reaches out to me, palm up, ready for my hand to slide over his. “Come here, Tracey, I’d like to talk to you.”

  I nod, taking another step toward him, looking into his golden eyes as they travel over me. He appeals to me, entices me.

  My steps halt. I look over my shoulder at Nathan and then back to him.

  “Come on, Sparks, let me love you,” Roehl encourages with a sweet smile.

  A roughened pound attacks my heart as I’m continuing to him. Every step, it gets worse.

  Nathan’s at my side, grabbing me again. With nothing more than a foot between Roehl and us, my arm rises, reaching out for him. The space between he and I grows as the warm hands wrapped around my arm and waist pull me back.

  I turn up my nose, ordering, “Nathan, release me.” I snatch my arm from him, inching toward Roehl. “You said you loved me?” I ask him.

  “I do love you, Sparks.”

  “But you don’t know me.”

  “I do. Everything about you. From your need of freedom to your desire to be cared for. Your wish of comfort. Even the admiration you crave. Not only do I love you, but I can give all of that to you and more.”

  “Really?” My heart thumps hard in my chest. I place the hand I removed from Nathan to it, feeling its hollow beat. It’s eager. Maybe eager for me to chase the freedom I crave.

  “Really.” He smiles at me, and I return it.

  I close the remaining distance to him, and he grabs my waist. A great void is filled with his touch. I’d indulge in it, but I’m not allowed the opportunity. I’m snatched away, and a different comforting touch replaces Roehl’s. Nathan’s. . . This is confusing and frustrating.

  Roehl struts forward. “Don’t interfere, Nate.”

  “I’ll interfere, and you’ll have to go through me to get her. And she’ll have to go through me to choose you,” Nathan swears.

  “Do you doubt her, Nate? Your mate?”

  I watch their exchange, studying them. Both worthy of my time. I’ve been with Nathan, and it has been one hell of a rollercoaster ride. He’s made me touch the stars, but he’s also taken me to the core of the Earth with some things we’ve experienced. Roehl, he offers a life I want. . . If I could find peace and freedom in him— No. . . Is that right? Roehl promises things. . . Things I already have. Are my peace and freedom not in my mate. . .? I move Nathan aside, stepping in front of him. Going back to Roehl, he welcomes me in his stocky arms, and I gaze into his striking, gold eyes. Studying. . . Considering.

  As he’s leaning in to kiss me, I’m yanked away.

  “Nathan! Stop! Let me go,” I spit, jabbing the air with the point of my finger. Going back to Roehl, I wrap an arm around his neck, feeling the coolness of his skin. I rest my free hand against his chest, feeling the softness of his muscles, unlike Nate’s is firm.

  “I told you, she’d be mine.” Roehl glides his hand across my arm, and we’re free of any shock. His kiss against my cheek also doesn’t burn.

  Playing with the thought of kissing him, I brush my thumb across his lips. Not yet ready to go that far, I kiss this side of his cheek where the body of the sun rests against his face.

  His head turns, and our lips graze.

  Roehl’s wrenched away from me, thrown on his back. He’s quickly back on his feet, rushing Nathan. The men he came with stand back, not concerned with their fight. Nathan gets Roehl by his neck and tries to rip his head off.

  “Nathan,” I shout. “Don’t!” Roehl shoves Nathan, forcing him away. I run between them with my back to Roehl and a hand thrown out toward Nathan. “Back off,” I threat with a push that doesn’t move Nathan.

  “Sparks,” he growls venomously in his red-tented skin, sharp teeth, and spiked hair. But it doesn’t intimidate me; his call is a request. “Don’t be influenced.” He reaches for me, and I swat his hand away. “It’s written Sparky, in the beat of your heart. . . In my chest.”

  Roehl’s arms push around my waist. He kisses my cheek, lips smooth and air sweet. “Tell him to leave, Sparks. He’ll have no choice but to listen,” he whispers in my ear.

  “Leave, Nathan. Get out of here. Go home,” I shoot off, shooing him.

  “Good girl,” Roehl kisses the cuff of my ear. “I love you for that.”

  I peek over my shoulder at him, and then face him full-bodied.

  “C’mon. Let’s go home,” he tells me.

  I nod, feeling a smile tug at the corners of my mouth.

  “Told you, brother, she’d choose me,” Roehl taunts as we’re turning away.

  “Sparky . . . don’t,” Nathan utters from behind me.

  Roehl laughs, open-mouthed, with his sharp, golden teeth displayed. I stop to watch him, seeing his teeth dripping my blood with a faint memory of pain in my shoulder. Studying his eyes, taking in the feel of his hand, watching the moon dance on his face, and being this close to him feels . . . wrong. A heavy resentment for the man squirms my stomach. Deranged memories of his flaws rise in my thoughts. Eyeing him, in his humored laughter, I brush my thumb over his bottom lip. He calms, kissing it. With deep admiration, he gazes at me as if I were a trophy he’d just battled for and won.

  Roehl leans forward for my kiss.

  Drawing back, I smile, being that unattainable trophy. “I will never choose you.”

  His smile fades. He bursts into ash, joining the dirt beneath my feet. Staring at the remnants, I back to Nathan, almost missing the two men charging for me. I thrust out my hands, blasting a warp of fire at their heads. They drop, decapitated. I finish them off, blowing over my hands to set their bodies on fire.

  Turning away, I leave back down the path. Not a second later, a relief only heaven can provide showers down on me. I exhale, feeling Roehl’s hold lifted off me, feeling my confusion fade, feeling no desire for that stranger lie in me whatsoever. My knees weaken.

  Nathan swoops me up in his arms, carrying me as we walk. A smile lightens his once grief-stricken face. I throw my arms around his neck, and he adjusts me so I can wrap around him.

  Back in his regular form, he drops to his knees. “I love you so fucking much, baby,” he promises. I let my knees fall to the ground, leaving my arms wrapped around him, letting him hold me until he’s ready to let go. “We had some bad shit happen to us today, but I need to bask in this moment for a second.”

  His hold loosens, and I pull back to look at him. “I know the feeling.”

  Warm, orange-brown eyes gloss over as they bore into mine. His head falls against my shoulder, and I place mine beside his. There are no words for this moment. To feel relieved by my freedom but be burdened by losing two people we love. This moment in our life is bittersweet. Pain in our loss, pleasure in our triumph.

  I grab Nathan’s head, lifting it. “You’ve gotten really big.”

  He smiles, lifting us from the ground. “I didn’t notice.”

  I hook my arm around his and let him reel me into his side. “You have. You’re huge in that form of yours.”

  He breathes. “You want to go back to the house or continue walking?”

  “We may run into people if we go back in, let’
s continue. My emotions are clashing. I’m heavy and light and prefer just us.”

  “Cool. Let’s go to the beach.”

  Olar and Lana cross our path. “You two okay?” Olar asks, taking Nathan’s other side.

  Nathan shrugs. “I can’t say. Yes and no.”

  “I’m sorry about what happened.”

  “Don’t be,” Nathan remarks. His feelings toward Olar are little off, wanting to but not wanting to blame him for what happened. I feel the same way. We can’t blame him for wanting to save his mate, but we were in the clear, had him and could’ve run right out the door to our freedom. The five of us could’ve escaped with our lives, but we had to stay there longer, allowing our enemies the opportunity to catch up with us. It’s not his fault. It’s no one’s fault, but we could’ve, maybe, found another way to get his mate. “Yeah, babe, that’s how I’m trying to avoid thinking,” Nathan counters, looking down at me from the corner of his eyes.

  I crinkle the left side of my face, shamefully apologizing. “Just made it worse?”

  He chuckles. “It’s okay.” He pulls me closer than the close I was, and I lay my head on his side as we stroll. I know I can’t, but somehow, I’m trying to relieve him, wanting his happy to overrule his misery. It’s not working.

  “You mind if we join you?” Olar asks.

  “Feel free,” Nathan answers, sweeping his hand out in front of himself.

  After walking in silence for a bit more, we settle in the sand, some feet from the water. The moon dances on its surface to the sound of the rustling trees. I flick my gaze to the sky. The moon rests stationary. As it should. It’s lonely up there tonight. Half full and without a star in sight. Almost like this moment in my life. If I shift my gaze down to the night sky in the water, it’s joyous; glistening lights are dancing with the excited moon. But up there, in the still firmament, it’s repentant.

  Hey, I know you may blame me for what happened, and I’m sorry I got us into this mess. But I’m grateful you risked your lives to save my mate and me, Olar intrudes the silence of my mind. “I’d like to introduce you,” he says to Lana, then looks at us, making sure it’s okay.