Ever Faithful

by Karen Barnett

  “So you’re going out with her every day to get some private schoolin’, and she doesn’t know how you feel? That’s got to be rough.”

  “If she found out, she wouldn’t come anywhere near me.”

  “Did you cook this up as an excuse to spend time with her?”

  “No.” Nate sat up. “Not at all. This was her idea. At least at first.” But now, she’d invaded his thoughts so completely, all he could think about was their next lesson. Sitting side by side, talking, laughing, reading. The smell of her hair, the touch of her hand. Nate let his head fall forward into his hands. “I don’t know anymore.”

  His friend was silent for a long time. Finally, he reached over and took the letter from Nate’s lap. “How’s about I read this for you?”

  Nate lifted his head. “I’d appreciate that.”

  * * *

  Elsie whomped the pillow onto the bed with a little more force than was necessary, the action releasing a smidgen of the tension in her arms.

  “I know they call us pillow punchers, but let’s not send any feathers flying.” Mary rescued the rest of the linens. “I don’t want to be stitching seams tonight when I could be out with Red.”

  Elsie ran a hand across the coverlet, smoothing any wrinkles she’d just caused. “Red again? I didn’t think he’d end up as your steady date. Other than Hal, you haven’t stayed with one man this long.”

  A smile darted across Mary’s face. “I’ve never liked one as much.”

  Elsie straightened. “Why’d you choose him over Hal? He’s not better looking. He’s got no prospects to speak of.” The sour words spilled from her lips before she could stop herself. But maybe if she could figure out why Mary chose Red, her longing for Nate would make some sense.

  Her friend’s smile vanished as quickly as it had arrived. “Elsie, I know you’re in a mood today, but don’t take it out on me and Red. You’re the one who keeps insisting the CCC men aren’t a bunch of street thugs.”

  Elsie sat on the corner of the bed, hot tears taking her by surprise.

  Mary froze. “What…what’s wrong? Is it your mother?”

  Elsie covered her face with her hands. “No. Mother’s doing much better ever since they returned from Billings.”

  Her friend crouched in front of her. “What, then? Is it Teddy?”

  After a quick swallow, Elsie nodded. “I…I turned him down.”

  Mary closed her eyes for a moment. “I thought this might be coming.”

  A sob trapped in Elsie’s throat forced its way out as a pathetic hiccup. “He kept saying he wanted me to stay. But I can’t give up college.” Elsie sent her friend a look, pleading for her to understand. “And then there’s Nate.”

  “Nate Webber?” Mary bit her lip, then pulled Elsie to her feet. She made quick work of the room, straightened the coverlet, and grabbed their mop bucket and laundry pile. “Come with me. We’ll take our lunch break. I’m getting you out of here before you get tears on the fresh linens.”

  Elsie set the towels back in the cart, fighting the urge to bury her face in their softness and never emerge.

  Mary walked her out into the yard. “Let’s head to the café. My treat. We’ll have a strong cup of coffee and a piece of cake. Tears deserve cake.”

  “Then we better get a few platefuls.” Elsie dabbed a handkerchief against her eyes. “Because I’ve made mistakes in my life, but this one? Marrying Teddy would have been an Old Faithful–sized mistake. But I still feel awful—like it’s somehow my fault.

  The two women made their way across the road to the café in silence. As they maneuvered through the crowded eatery, Elsie focused on keeping her tears at bay. She didn’t want to look mournful among all the happy tourists celebrating their day in Wonderland.

  When they were seated with coffee and dessert, Elsie forced out the story, including the bits about Nate.

  Mary sighed. “I knew something seemed off between you and Teddy. I shouldn’t have pushed him at you.” She guided a forkful of cake to her mouth, then chewed slowly as if taking time to consider her words. “I think he’s your Hal.”

  Elsie sat back in her seat, studying her friend’s face. “My Hal?”

  “He thought he knew exactly what you wanted, but that’s because he didn’t bother to really get to know you.”

  The fragrant smell of the hot coffee overwhelmed Elsie’s senses. She cradled the cup in her palms, the warmth of the porcelain soothing. “I want to teach. I can help students learn about all the wonders in the world. It’s what I’ve worked toward for years, but he thought I’d toss it aside as if my plans meant nothing.”

  Mary leaned forward, pinning Elsie with her gaze. “He was in love, but not with you.”

  “He said he was. He wanted to marry me.”

  “He just thought he was in love with you. But any man who cares about you will care about your dreams too. Your dreams are a part of who you are. A big piece. If he wouldn’t take time to see that, then he was in love with some girl he cooked up in his own imagination.”

  Elsie considered her words. “He wanted a woman who would be content living out his dreams.”

  “Yes! Elsie, you need a man who truly loves all of you, including the hopes God has given you. A man doesn’t get to pick and choose certain pieces of you so you fit the mold he has for a perfect mate.” Mary ran a hand over her hair, the strands picking up the sunlight filtering through the front window. “Hal thought I wanted a clean-cut, wealthy guy who owned a hotel.”

  “That’s what you said you wanted.”

  “True.” She laughed. “But I was wrong. It took me a while to realize my true dreams were for someone who would laugh with me. Crack silly jokes. Treat me like a million bucks instead of trying to make a million of his own.” She made a face. “I got a letter from Hal yesterday. He’s got a new girl, some pearl diver at the lodge. Even when he’s boasting, he’s as dry as paper.”

  Elsie ran her fingers around the edge of her plate. “I feel badly for hurting Teddy.”

  “So apologize to him and let it be water under the bridge.” Mary leaned forward. “But here’s a question for you. What will you do next—about Nate?”

  That thought had kept her tossing and turning late into the night. “Nothing. I made one enormous mistake by allowing a romance to usurp my dreams. I’m not doing it again. I’m just going to concentrate on getting ready for school.”

  Her friend took a sip of her coffee and made a face. “Why do I always think I’m going to like this stuff? I want to be all modern and sophisticated with my black coffee, but I still prefer iced tea.” She tapped her fingernails against the table. “How can men hope to understand us? We don’t even understand ourselves.”

  A warmth settled in Elsie’s chest. She sat back in her seat. “Isn’t that the truth.”

  Mary grinned. “Now that you have everything figured out, can I stir the pot a little?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “If you believe God gave you the dream to go to college and become a teacher—to help kids learn more about this big, beautiful world—is there a chance He put Nate here to play a part in it?”

  Elsie set her cup on the table. “You’re always the romantic, aren’t you?”

  “You know it, sweetie.”

  Nate followed a large group of the men down the road to the Canyon Hotel for a history lecture, only half-aware of their joking and laughter drowning out the evening birdsong. His thoughts were elsewhere. Even Red and Val seemed to recognize his mood and steered clear.

  Nate couldn’t figure it out. In the past two weeks, his lessons with Elsie had gone from encouraging and friendly to encouraging but distant. She’d asked him to move their lessons to the classroom, but after much discussion he’d convinced her to meet in a meadow just out of sight of the camp.

  She paced around the clearing
while he stumbled through the words. He still made progress, but at a crawl. Was she tiring of the extra work?

  He supposed it had something to do with what Red had told him—that Elsie had finally dumped the arrogant ranger. Nate was proud of the college girl. She deserved someone who could see her talents and encourage her to use them, the way she did for everyone else. Red’s second piece of news had been less heartening. Mary wanted him to know her roommate wasn’t interested in having a beau. She had her sights set on college, and nothing would change that.

  Nate had tried to cast off his infatuation like the bark and debris they tossed on the burn piles. But like everything else in nature, his feelings were persistent. The more he uprooted them, the faster they seemed to grow.

  He followed Val into the elegant hotel, the open windows capturing the cool breeze sweeping up from the rim of the canyon. Chairs were spread out in rows facing a small screen. Guests, savages, and CCCs mingled, eager voices talking about the upcoming program. Small children darted around the aisle, their excitement at staying up beyond their bedtime creating an air of silliness and wild abandon.

  The smell of popcorn took him back to the days when he and Sherm would sneak into Ebbets Field to watch the Dodgers. They never had money for seats, much less popcorn, but the scent triggered a wave of memories, regardless.

  Red elbowed him. “There’s my girl over there. You two be all right on your own?”

  “I’m not sure, Red. We might get lost.” Nate dug for his sense of humor. “Or maybe the kid here will get his pocket picked by one of these gentlemen.”

  Val straightened his tie. “More likely, they’re going to think I’m a grifter. What are we doing here?”

  “We were invited, remember? The hotel invited the whole crew.” Nate glanced around. Most everyone had taken them up on the offer too. The CCCs outnumbered the hotel guests two-to-one.

  One of the rangers stood at the front and gestured for folks to take their seats.

  Nate found a place for him and Val near the door. As the man spoke, Nate tried to focus on the lantern slides and retelling of Yellowstone’s history, but instead he found himself gazing at the back of Elsie’s head. She shifted about in her seat, as if to scan the room. Was she looking for him? He brushed away the thought. Just as likely, she was checking on her students. Or maybe her cousin.

  He settled back in the chair, giving himself over to the stories of Indian wars and army rule. His sisters would eat this stuff up. He’d need to remember the tall tales for when he got home. Home. His sisters’ letters had been filled with stories too. Apparently Charlie had another brush with the law, but their father had gotten hold of him and straightened him out. The thought had sent Nate’s mood into a tailspin. He should be there looking out for the boy. Their father’s methods were little better than those of the soldiers who pursued the Nez Perce through Yellowstone.

  Nate closed his eyes, letting the story wash over him. He was busy imagining himself on the run with Chief Joseph, when Val bumped his leg with the side of his fist and jarred him back to reality.

  Val hooked his thumb toward the aisle, shooting Nate a pointed look.

  Nate turned his head in time to see Elsie disappear out the side door. What did Val expect him to do, chase her down?

  The kid leaned close and whispered out of the corner of his mouth. “Go after her.”

  “And do what?” What did a sixteen-year-old know about women? Nate shifted against the stiff back of the wooden chair. Then again, did he have any better understanding at twenty-four?

  Apparently his legs agreed with Val, because within five minutes every muscle was twitching. There was no way he could sit still to the end of the lecture with this much energy coursing through his system. “I’m going out for some air,” he whispered to Val.

  The youngster’s grin held a little too much enthusiasm for Nate’s tastes.

  Nate eased his way down the aisle and then stepped through the doors and into the cool, dark night. Elsie was nowhere to be seen. Just as well. He wasn’t sure he trusted himself not to say something stupid. He walked a circuit around the parking area in a vain attempt to burn off his jitters.

  He was sure he’d seen desire in Elsie’s eyes a couple of weeks ago, the day he’d nearly kissed her in the woods, and that image had burned itself into his memory. But she was right to focus on school. She didn’t need Vaughn or him—or anyone else—messing up things for her. He needed to honor her decision, even if it left a gaping hole in his heart.

  Nate stopped by one of the yellow buses parked near the hotel for the night. Leaning against it, he stared up at the stars, the display of lights draping him with a newfound sense of peace. He and Elsie could still be friends, right? In reality, they’d never been anything more than that. If she were here right now, they’d talk about geology, teaching, and Yellowstone. And then I’d kiss her.

  He pressed fingers against his brow. Don’t be an idiot. It might take more than one lap around the lot to clear his head.

  “Nate?” Elsie’s voice carried down the sidewalk.

  He swiveled, the clear-headed words he’d thought just moments ago now jumbling in his mind like they often did on the page.

  “Are you leaving?” She walked toward him, then stopped a few paces short.

  “No. Just needed some air.”

  “Me too.”

  How was it he could still see the blue of her eyes here in the dark? Nate locked his knees to prevent himself from walking over and taking her into his arms. It didn’t help matters when she stared at him like that.

  “Nate, I feel like our lessons have been a little…stiff lately.” She hesitated. “Like you’re ill at ease with me.”

  He swallowed the urge to laugh. “Funny, I thought the same about you.” Oh, how he missed her. The way she smiled and laughed at things he said. The way her eyes lit up when he learned a new word. Could he tell her that? He swallowed. “Red told me about you and Vaughn.”

  Her gaze lowered. “We weren’t a good match.”

  “No.” The reply slipped too quickly.

  The briefest of smiles touched her lips when she looked up again, meeting his eyes. “He cared nothing about learning who I am and what is important to me. I intend to go to college and become a teacher. He only wants a sweet little wife.”

  “You have to become a teacher. Look what you’ve done for the men. For me.” He stopped himself from reaching for her hand. No matter how badly he wanted to touch her, he missed her friendship more. “How about we walk for a while? Unless you wanted to hear the rest of the talk?”

  “I know how it ends.”

  As they walked, her silence provided plenty of time for his thoughts to run rampant. He reminded himself to give her space. Give himself space. She was his teacher, after all. I have a crush on the teacher. He almost chuckled. I guess there’s a first time for everything.

  After several minutes Elsie spoke. “I told Mary I should concentrate on college.”

  “I think that’s wise.”

  “Only, I’m having trouble with that.”

  “With college?”

  “With concentrating.” She slipped her hand under his arm.

  The touch sent a rush of heat surging through him.

  How had he already fallen behind in this short conversation?

  “You’ve been on my mind, Nate Webber.”

  He stopped in his tracks. “Are you saying—”

  “But the summer is nearly over. You’ll go home to Brooklyn, and I’ll be heading to Missoula.” She tipped her head, a question shining in her eyes.

  “I see.” Only, he didn’t. Was she talking about friendship?

  “It would be a little crazy, wouldn’t it—us?”

  Us. Nate reached down to cover her fingers with his own. Her skin was cool to the touch. “Definitely crazy.”r />
  She bit her lip, her gaze not breaking from his.

  He stepped closer and cupped her jaw with his hand. What had he just been thinking about friendship? “You know what would be even more nutty? A college girl stepping out with an illiterate laborer.”

  Instead of backing away, as he’d feared she would, she tightened her grip on his arm. “Or a well-respected foreman with a lowly pillow puncher.”

  Nate couldn’t resist her any longer. He drew her completely into his arms, lowering his face to the top of her head. Her hair smelled like lavender and…and something else. Popcorn from the hotel?

  She slid her arms around his waist, her body surrendering to his embrace even as she nestled her cheek against his shoulder.

  He could feel her breath against his neck, the sensation driving any sensible thought from his mind. “I’m not sure this will help your concentration,” he murmured into her hair.

  “I’m concentrating better than I have in weeks.” She lifted her head and smiled, looking straight into his eyes.

  The sight of her smile weakened any resolve he had left. He bent down and pressed his lips to hers, as he’d dreamed of doing since that first day at Norris Basin. Soft at first, he didn’t dare move away for fear that she’d come to her senses. Her lips tasted of popcorn too. He was pretty sure that smell and taste would never make him think of baseball again.

  She leaned into his kiss, and by the time they drew apart, he’d forgotten how to breathe. Elsie kept her palm against his cheek. “This is crazy.” Her words barely stirred the air.

  Nate rested his forehead against hers. “If this is crazy, college girl, I’m not sure I want to be sane.”

  * * *

  Elsie tapped a pencil on her knee as she graded papers at the small desk she shared with Mary. A lot could happen in twenty-four hours. She’d learned that lesson at a young age, but it still surprised her every time.

  I kissed Nate Webber.

  The delicious memory sent a shiver across her skin, just as it had all day while she scrubbed toilets, changed sheets, and helped tourists find their rooms. She’d decided not to date, and then two weeks later she was kissing the man. This was so unlike her. But evidently her sensible side had checked out some time ago. She swept a hand through her hair, the stuffy air in the room making it difficult to think. Elsie went to the window and propped it open.