Remember Fate

by Ginny Sterling

  Once daylight came, things would be different. Jamie would have had time to think about what had just happened, the rebels could find them, or they might escape. Either way, the change was coming fast to her world, and she wanted to hold on to this unreal fantasy she was experiencing as long as possible before reality intruded once again.

  Chapter Nine

  Lucy awoke to light beginning to stream into the cave entrance. She heard Jamie’s soft breath nearby and knew he was still asleep. She wasn’t ready for this; she wasn’t ready to face reality. It had been so magical to kiss him, something she’d always dreamed of and never imagined would happen. Hearing a noise that sounded entirely too close, she froze, listening.

  Someone was climbing the rock face!

  Her heart pounded as she immediately shook Jamie’s sleeping form. It was hard not to focus on the way his body felt under the clothing and her fingertips. She couldn’t afford to imagine things could go further. She was the rebound girl and about to get captured—both horrifying things!

  “Jamie!” she whispered in a hushed voice, shaking him again. She knew immediately when he came to because he jumped and tensed under her hand. Ohhh my gosh, she thought wildly, abs for days!

  “Jamie—listen!”

  They were still lying there towards the back of the cave under the cover of darkness but it was fading fast. The sun was rising over the hills and she was pretty certain their location would be almost fully illuminated for a short while in no time fast before it continued on its ascent. Seconds passed before they heard it again. The sound of pebbles skittering across rock—and it was close.

  Jamie crept slowly away from Lucy and she felt an overwhelming chill rock her to the core as she heard the click of his gun in the inky shadows that were dissipating. She could almost make out his steely expression as he stared forward towards the opening.

  “Don’t move,” he breathed quietly, not looking at her. “I will go check—if I don’t return, go back further into the cave as far as possible.”

  “Let’s go together,” she argued.

  “No!” he bit out and then glanced at her, surprising her. His eyes actually looked concerned and for a moment she thought maybe there was something there. It couldn’t be—could it?

  “No, stay here.”

  Nodding, she watched as he slowly moved towards the front of the cave. Each step he took, her heart sounded like a hollow drum in her chest. The soldier in him had taken over, hiding the smiling man she had known for years. The tense, cold, calculating look in his expression was daunting as he crept towards the opening. Jamie held aloft his gun near his head, his profile deadly.

  James Bond eat your heart out, she mused idly, unable to tear her eyes away. He was captivating and she was a darn fool to allow herself to dream something was even there between them. Oh, there was something there all right—it was Annabelle and would always be! The moment the other woman snapped her fingers or pleaded her case, things would be different with Jamie. She saw him aim the gun towards the opening, bracing herself for the sound of it firing, just before Jamie’s posture suddenly relaxed.

  “Luka?” he questioned, glancing back towards where Lucy hid. “What are you doing here? Are the rebels gone?”

  The head of the man she’d briefly met at the airport suddenly appeared over the edge of the ledge, grinning like an idiot. His face was pale, and he looked to be sweating profusely.

  “You two are sure hard to find,” he blustered, pulling himself upwards. “I’ve tried to keep things quiet looking for you two knuckleheads while we spread out to search the hillside. FYI – the truck is gone and Logan will have your butt in a sling for that one.”

  “I just did what he ordered.”

  “Spend the night in a cave?”

  “No,” Jamie extended his hand as Luka got to his feet, “Lucy—we’re safe. You can come out.”

  Luka suddenly grinned again, elbowing Jamie. Her face flushed red as she knew what the other man was thinking had happened by his approving smile.

  “Dude, she’s so worth it then,” she heard him whisper only to see Jamie’s frown as his expression darkened.

  “It’s not like that.”

  “No, it’s not,” Lucy blurted out hotly. “We were inspecting the area for my story and heard a drone just before the rebels found the truck.”

  “Suuuure,” Luka drawled weakly, winking at Jamie. “Afghanistan is a perfect place for a stroll. I take all my dates here. Now, can we go?”

  “Are you all right?” Lucy suddenly blurted out, seeing the sweat pouring down his face. Jamie looked from Lucy back at the other man, chiming in.

  “Luka, are you sick?”

  “No. Just feeling a little peckish.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “I don’t know,” he said, wiping his brow. “I’m actually feeling pretty rough and just want to get out of here. I think I need to eat something.”

  “We need to go while it's clear,” Jamie agreed quickly, waving Lucy forward. They quickly scrambled out of the cave and began their descent. She could see other soldiers on either side of them, moving slowly towards the large convoy truck that sat abandoned in the hill's valley.

  “How many are out here?”

  “Just our squad—no brother gets left behind,” Luka said.

  They’d just gotten to the valley floor when Luka’s eyes suddenly rolled back in his head as he collapsed. Lucy sprang into action almost at the same time that Jamie did. He caught Luka as he fell, laying him onto the sand. Lucy touched his face and glanced up at Jamie. Several other soldiers knelt down beside them and helped pick up Luka. They carried him quickly to the truck and deposited him into the shade.

  “Is he sickly?” Lucy asked, climbing into the truck and feeling Luka’s forehead again. He wasn’t overly hot but something wasn’t right.

  “Not that we know of,” Jamie admitted. Lucy felt Luka’s pulse in his throat; it fluttered wildly under her fingertips. She wasn’t a doctor by any means but it didn’t take a degree to know something was terribly wrong. Problem was, she didn’t know what.

  The truck lunged forward, engine roaring, as it raced forward. She heard several men talking around her as she picked up Luka’s head and put it in her lap to keep it from bouncing around on the hard truck bed where she had knelt. Jamie sat beside her and gathered up Luka’s limp hand in his, his body swaying with the movement of the truck in the sand. It felt like it took forever to get back to base.

  In the meantime, other soldiers were checking over Luka looking for any signs of a snake or spider bite. They had the med kit out trying to determine what to do, arguing over the repercussions of attempting anything else. They scattered the contents of the first aid kit around the truck. Gauze, bandages, burn cream, iodine, and water purification tablets seemed to be utterly useless on the unconscious man. Two soldiers were holding Luka’s legs up in the air, trying to keep the extremities above heart level. They’d loosened his belt, untucking his shirt in an effort to cool him down in case it was heat stroke.

  Luka was breathing.

  His heart was beating.

  He was just unconscious, and no one knew why.

  “Going straight to Med,” the driver yelled back. Lucy looked at Jamie’s stricken face as he sat there clenching Luka’s hand. His beloved tan face was pinched and his eyes haunted. She lay her hand on his arm, causing him to jump. He was completely focused on his friend and she’d disturbed whatever thoughts were going through his mind.

  “Jamie, are you okay?”

  “It hurts to do this again,” he whispered painfully. “It’s too soon.”

  Lucy thought he was talking about Annabelle until she heard several other soldiers around her chime in, in unison. The team had someone in their group that had gotten injured or died at some point recently.

  This was another side of them she’d never thought to experience and wasn’t sure she wanted to share this private moment with the rest of the world. They were at their lowes
t and rallying around one of their fallen. Unsure what to say, she wanted to let him know he was doing the right thing by being there for him but Jamie seemed to sense that already.

  “No brother gets left behind,” Jamie whispered as the truck came to a stop. A massive roar of approval went up around where they sat, as the other eight men chanted ‘brothers at arms’ in response loudly. The back gate of the truck was flung open and the quick movement stunned her.

  Men were filing out of the truck like water pouring out of a faucet as other soldiers grabbed Luka’s legs, pulling him quickly out of the vehicle. They put his limp body on a nearby gurney and disappeared out of sight as quickly as the soldiers moved from view.

  Lucy sat there for a moment, utterly alone in the utility truck. Forgotten once again but this time she understood why. Luka needed attention. It stunned her at what had happened in the last twenty-four hours, not to mention the last few minutes. Jamie’s dark head suddenly appeared, his expression harried.

  “Do you need help to get down?”

  “No.”

  “Then c’mon and let’s get inside.”

  “You go on.”

  “Lucy—I’m not leaving you, but I’d rather be inside the clinic right now. Can we please go?”

  Surprised, she saw how torn his dark eyes were as he glanced between where she was in the truck and back towards the building. He wanted to be with his friend but was waiting on her. Instantly feeling guilty, she got up and quickly moved to get down from the truck.

  Jamie’s hands picked her up by the waist and put her down on the ground almost abruptly as if she wasn’t moving fast enough for him. He clasped her hand and practically pulled her inside of the small clinic. The group of soldiers stood outside of a room and their grim expression told her that there were no answers as of yet. Coming to a stop, she tugged on Jamie’s hand.

  “Jamie, go be with them,” she said quietly to him as she realized he was a part of this group, this team. They had a bond, and she wasn’t part of it. She was an outsider, an observer, and they needed privacy at this tense moment while they waited for word. Jamie’s haunted expression shocked her as his dark eyes met hers.

  “Can you stay here for a bit… with me?” he whispered, looking away. “I… this is reminding me of when another soldier was injured. It’s too much and makes me remember how dangerous it could be here.”

  “What happened before?”

  “One of my friends lost his leg on patrol. A mine detonated, and we barely got him back here in time… now Luka is…”

  Jamie took a deep ragged breath and swallowed, looking up at the ceiling silently. Lucy watched his Adam’s Apple work several times before she laid her hand on top of his. He still held her left hand in his and hadn’t released it yet. He needed this tether from his friend—and she could happily be that for him, if nothing else.

  “You don’t have to, but I would appreciate it,” he uttered, glancing back over his shoulder at the men that waited.

  “Friends stick together,” she prompted softly, “Luka will be fine, Jamie. I’m sure of it. When he wakes up, we’ll be here—all of us.”

  He nodded without a word and walked over to where the other men were taking their seats along the benches nearby. Lucy gingerly sat the furthest on the bench, feeling like an outsider almost. They were all talking together as if to keep their worries at bay. The men discussed anything else, cracked several lewd jokes, and commented on what was on the menu for dinner tonight in the mess hall.

  It seemed like an odd conversation to be overhearing, but then she realized that it was a ploy to keep their unspoken fear at a manageable level. No one wanted to point out the pink elephant in the room. They knew where they were - and the fact that their unconscious friend was undergoing a series of tests to see what exactly was wrong. The camaraderie between the soldiers was humbling for Lucy, making her realize now more than ever just how alone she was in her own world.

  Just then, the door opened, and a doctor stepped out. The soldiers all jumped to their feet at once in unison, making Lucy gape at the way they snapped to attention. She rose quickly to her feet, her face flushing with embarrassment that she’d been the last to stand when the doctor spoke.

  “He’ll be fine and is resting right now.”

  “What happened?” Jamie blurted out anxiously. Lucy reached for his hand, knowing how worried he’d been and that the doctor couldn’t say much because of privacy.

  “I’ll discuss it with him once he’s rested.”

  Several of the men began to speak at once, asking questions, as the doctor held up his hand.

  “Look. I know you are worried but I cannot say anything without discussing the matter with the patient first. He will be fine and you can visit with him tomorrow once.”

  “Jamie,” Lucy began and was shocked to see another soldier step forward.

  “I can take the reporter back to Kabul and pick up the camera guy for you, if you want to stay,” he said, overlooking Lucy completely and meeting Jamie’s eyes. Jamie hesitated, and she felt her soul deflate.

  That was it?

  She was about to get brushed off to the side like a piece of nothing? What happened to being friends – and that kiss? Was that just nothing? Inside her soul, Lucy was screaming against the idea of being separated from Jamie once again. She didn’t belong there, and it was obvious by the expression on the other men’s faces. They weren’t rude about it. It was more of a questioning look in their expressions. The only reason she was there was to do a job – and that job was over.

  Dropping Jamie’s hand, Lucy stepped back, drawing herself up. She was better than the nothing that she felt right now—and she would never allow someone to make her feel less than her worth. She wouldn’t be the rebound for Jamie, nor would she be a burden.

  “Please?” Lucy said in a strong voice that hid her inner turmoil. If she didn’t get herself out of this situation, she might just break down and cry. Why had she allowed herself to hope for more? “I’m in desperate need of a shower and a decent meal. If we can go soon that would be terrific. I can get started on my notes.”

  “Are you sure?” Jamie whispered, his eyes searching hers. Lucy swallowed and plastered a fake smile on her face, hoping that her true inner turmoil didn’t show through her façade.

  “Positive. Your friend is going to be okay. I seem to keep crossing your path and it’s always good to see a friend, Jamie. Take care of yourself, okay?”

  “Don’t we need to talk?” he whispered, his expression unfathomable. The look on the other men’s faces weren’t. Several knowing looks and telling glances made her feel cheap over something completely innocent. It was a kiss—that was all.

  “There’s nothing to discuss,” she said brightly, smiling politely.

  “I’ll email you.”

  “No problem.”

  “Lucy…” his voice was nearly her undoing. Could there have been something to the kiss they’d shared? It wasn’t possible, she thought deep down inside. He couldn’t hop from one great love to another so soon.

  Their single kiss was nothing—wasn’t it?

  If fate had given her a chance to meet Jamie once again, wouldn’t their paths cross again? She’d met him as a girl, wanted and waited as a teenager, and now as a woman she was strong enough to recognize that the time wasn’t right. Jamie had to get beyond his own demons from his past in order to move forward.

  Lucy recognized that she wasn’t the first choice right now for Jamie—and might never be. She had been a convenient friend and that hurt so very much. He’d needed comfort and had kissed her. He’d needed support here at the clinic and she’d been there. He hadn’t looked to her in the past when they were growing up—nor did he put her first in front of his friends. Lucy was important when no one else was around. She deserved better than that… no matter how much realizing it hurt her.

  “Let’s get going.”

  Chapter Ten

  January 2017

  Lucy,
<
br />   I wanted to reach out as soon as I spoke with Luka. He will be all right - but won’t be here much longer. He’s being discharged for medical reasons and won’t talk about it. I’m shocked almost as much as he is. I can see it in his face and the silence is unnerving from him. He just looks lost. So much has changed and I feel like I’m struggling to keep up with it all. He was such a help when I was going through everything with Annabelle and after Ethan Minter’s horrible accident—and now I can’t help him with his own problems! I feel like I have so much that I need to talk about, that I need to share, but I don’t even know where to begin.

  Write when you can,

  Jamie

  Jamie,

  I’m glad you wrote and sorry to hear that your friend Luka is going through a tough time right now. Did you ever find out what is wrong or why he’s being discharged medically? Where is Luka from? Does he need help to start out again in the States—or does the military do that already on their own? Share my email if he needs a friend to talk to—people can always use an extra friend.

  I know you said you were struggling to keep up with the changes in your life and can understand that completely. You’ve had a few big doozies hit you within the last year and need time to heal or process what is going on in your life. If you don’t know where to start—that means you need a little longer to get your bearings, my friend.

  Breathe.

  The world goes on around you regardless of if you feel panicked or if you can handle what cards you are dealt. It’s handling your inner circle that gets you through the day. You must realign those boundaries of that inner region and center yourself.

  It will be okay—I promise.

  You’ll always have a friend to talk to—even if it’s via email.

  Lucy

  February 2017

  Lucy,

  Luka is diabetic and apparently it’s an automatic discharge from the military. I’m not sure to what extent and he’s leaving Friday for the States. I don’t mean to sound rude but I don’t know if I am ready to share your email with him. I know you mean well and have a big heart but it’s a little hard to let another guy talk to the girl I’m interested in.