“Why are you so interested?”
I roll my eyes heavenward. “You’ve got a real problem with me trying to be nice haven’t you?”
“No,” he blurts and I’m surprised when his hand grips my arm on the console between us but lets it go immediately after. His way of comforting me I assume. “With our history I’m just skeptical.”
“Our history?” I roll my eyes heavenward again. “Is this about that Love Day thing?”
“That and the years of torment I endured at the mouths of your friends following the Love Day thing.”
I stare at his profile, trying to see where he’s at emotionally. He looks tense but not sad.
I decide at this point it’s best to simply not say anything. Truth be told that day was the hardest day of my life and I don’t want to explain why to him. We’re not in that place yet. We’re not friends yet.
Shit, I haven’t even told my friends about that day. We just don’t talk about it. I don’t talk about it.
“If it makes you feel better, I’ll drop the Love Day thing and pretend it never happened,” he adds. “Even though you humiliated me in front of the entire class and set a precedent for my future.”
“Oh my God,” I hiss and look at my phone simply so I don’t poke him in the eye. “Don’t do me any favors.”
We stop at a red light and he glares at me. “Don’t you feel bad for what you did?”
“Of course I do,” I reply. “I didn’t mean to hurt you. I was… in a bad place!”
He doesn’t say anything else but I know he’s still stewing over it. It’s a ridiculous thing to keep hold of but I can understand why. I was awful to him that day. Positively awful. But it wasn’t my fault, I was just a kid and I was broken, so fucking broken that day and every day that followed.
“Can we stop talking about that day now? It holds bad memories for both of us,” I whisper and look out of the window.
“Fine by me,” he replies and cranks the music up even louder.
As soon as we pull into a space on the school grounds I hop out of the car and hightail it past Duncan and Preston who are waiting for Stepdork. I ignore their waves and meet Bris at the entrance.
“That must have sucked,” she comments, referring to my ride.
I shrug. “Nah, Stepdork’s cool.”
She almost falls over laughing, sensing sarcasm from me that wasn’t there.
“Raven!” Travis calls, and when I turn, he’s holding my bag up.
“Shit,” I mutter. “Be right back.”
I rush over to him to grab it and mutter a thanks. Then I hitch it on my shoulder and look around the crowd of people for Bris again.
“Have a good day,” Travis says sincerely.
I give him a tight-lipped smile over my shoulder and link my arm through my friend’s. She smells sweet like lemons today. I like it.
* * *
I get an apple for lunch, apples are my favorite and truth be told I’ve not been feeling hungry. The weight of my future stresses lies heavily on my shoulders. My GPA is at an all-time low so I’m going to have to improve it. I need to get my homework done, I haven’t handed in a single thing this school year.
I’ve really messed up.
As we’re taking place at our usual table with a few other friends, I notice Travis across the way with his Dungeon dorks. I look at Cella who is still in the line getting food and then at Bris who is straddling the bench, waiting for me to sit.
“I’ll be back.”
“Where are you going?” Bris asks and Molly watches me edge my way through the crowded hall.
This is a statement to them. A statement to myself.
With my apple in hand and a skip in my step, I stop at Travis’ table and straddle a chair backwards, resting my arms on the plastic back of it.
They all look at me, Preston is wide-eyed, Duncan is nervous as though waiting for something bad to happen, and Travis looks as normal as he always does. His expression is unreadable.
“What about a slumber party?” I ask him and finally an expression I can read takes over his features. He’s confused.
“A slumber party?” He looks positively horrified.
“Yeah.” But then another thought hits me. “Or we could go camping?”
“You?”
I scowl at him. “I’ll have you know I’m an avid camper. I go every summer with my dad.”
He doesn’t look like he believes me.
“For real, the real camping, not the glamping. I know this great place an hour away. You can see all the stars, you can take your own alcohol, pitch your own tent. They allow camp fires so long as they’re not too big…”
“That sounds epic,” Preston breathes, looking at me with even wider eyes than before.
“We can make it a group thing or a family thing?” I suggest, really extending that olive branch now.
He thinks on it as I bite into my apple. “What do you mean a group thing? Us three and you?”
“Yeah, and I’ll invite some of my posse. Bris, Cella, and Molly will probably tag along? Maybe you’d like to invite a girl too that I can talk into coming?”
He shakes his head. “It’s a good idea but Mom would never go for it.”
“Travis, you leave home in a few months,” I say around another mouthful of apple. “We can work on Shonda. Live a little.”
“Please live, Travis,” Duncan begs with his hands clasped under his chin. “Pleeeeeaaaasssseeee.”
Travis nods, likely due to how excited his friends seem. “Okay. Camping.”
“Woohoo!” Preston and I cheer at the same time.
I mess up his soft hair with my hand that’s probably sticky from the juice of my apple and skip back over to my friends.
Cella and Bris are both staring at me as though I’ve grown a third head. Molly is eating food, oblivious to everything as per usual.
“We’re working shit out,” I explain. “For Dad and Shonda.”
Bris nods, accepting that. “Makes sense, you do gotta live together until like, college or something.”
“Maybe beyond then if I can’t get in anywhere decent.”
“Decent like where?” Cella questions, looking curious. “Where are you applying?”
“New York, maybe? I don’t know. I’ve been thinking about it a lot lately. School’s almost over. I’ve got to get my shit together if I want to graduate and go to a decent place.”
They all nod knowingly because I know they’ve been worrying about it a lot too.
All but Molly who grins at me. “We could totally room together.”
“You’re legit going to NYC?” Bris looks so upset.
“Hell yeah, I want to experience another place before coming home to work my ass off.”
“But what if you never want to come home?”
“You could always come with me?” Molly suggests and Bris looks forlorn about it all. “You know how much it means to me to go to New York, Bris. It’s where my dad grew up. I want to experience it all.”
“I’ll go if you’re going, maybe I’ll become an actress on Broadway and never have to work again,” Cella sighs.
Molly throws a potato chip at her. “Broadway actors work harder than anybody, Cella. You’re so dumb sometimes.”
“Whatever. You know what I mean.”
I laugh under my breath at them all. They’re so funny.
“So.” I rub my hands together after dropping my apple core onto Molly’s tray. “We’re going camping this weekend.”
“Ew. Why?”
“I was trying to find shit to do when I came across this in class.” I show her my phone screen which has an image of a poster from corner to corner. “There’s a festival going on up at Diamond Waters camping ground. Parties on the beach, camping in the trees, it’s perfect for a weekend winddown.”
“It does look good, it’s mostly cover bands too, maybe they’ll be super-hot and because they’re only cover bands, not unattainable either,” Bris looks as excited a
s I feel. Though I’m not excited at the prospect of bedding a guitarist or whatever. I’m just excited for the fun.
“There’s one catch,” I say, glancing at the dork group across the way. “It’s for Travis’ birthday.”
Cella cringes and tries to open her mouth but I cut her off before she can spew forth any insults.
“He’s my stepbrother. As horrid as he’s been, we’re trying, okay? So no more saying mean shit to him and his friends,” I explain as calmly as I can so it doesn’t create beef between us.
She huffs as though it’s a massive hardship.
“Listen to you laying down the law,” Lake says directly into my ear when he appears behind me. I hadn’t heard him approach. “It’s sexy.”
I tilt my head back to look at him and he steals a kiss from my prone lips.
I scowl at him. “Behave yourself, Lake.”
“Yeah, Lake, she doesn’t know where those lips have been,” Cella snarls and I know that she’s not upset with me.
“I do,” Molly puts in, finally paying full attention. “He was making out with Mae behind an easel in art class last period.”
I scrub my lips with the back of my hand as my girls and I all stand up. I prod Lake in the chest, forcing him back and out of my bubble.
“Thanks a lot, Molly.” Lake grunts.
“You’re gross, man,” she replies, giving no fucks. “She’s way too good for you.”
“I know, I’m working on it,” Lake grumbles taking the seats we just vacated. Ronnie and Depp sit either side of him.
“See you around, ladies,” Depp calls after us, wagging his pierced brow.
“Best asses on campus coming through!” Ronnie declares with cupped hands and we continue strutting away like we own this fucking school.
Unfortunately thanks to Stepmom and Daddy Douche, my plans have hit a snag. I knew Shonda would be reluctant but not this reluctant.
“Even though I’m leaving in a few months anyway?” I yell petulantly at the parental unit. “It’s not fair! You told us to get along and now that I’m trying you’re being major sibling blockers!”
My dad, who a year ago without Shonda would have said yes in a heartbeat, declares, “Well, what if we make it a family thing? All four of us?”
“My friends are already making plans to go! So are Travis’.”
Shonda looks at Travis who is standing to my left. “You really want to do this? You want to go camping? At a crazed festival full of drugs, alcohol, and God knows what else?”
“The festival is miles away from our campsite,” I reply for the millionth time.
“Two miles,” Travis corrects.
“Whose side are you on?” I hiss at him and his lips quirk. Then I put on my best puppy dog eyes and aim them at Dad’s bae. “Please, Shonda, Travis hasn’t ever experienced anything like this. We’ll be safe. We’ll call you every hour if we have to!”
Shonda is still waiting on Travis’ answer.
He takes off his glasses and casually cleans them using the bottom of his T-shirt. When he looks up again, we are all staring at him expectantly.
“It sounds like a good time. Guys are excited, I’m excited.” He shrugs his shoulders. “I haven’t done anything like this, I guess it’s better to experience it now? With you guys only an hour away?”
“I don’t know,” Shonda mutters and looks at Dad. “What do you think?”
“You know I’m with you whatever you decide.” Dad has become such a pussy-whipped man.
“But you don’t have a problem with it?”
He shakes his head. “I trust them.”
“You do?” I breathe, taking back my mind statement about him being pussy-whipped.
Shonda pouts and looks at her son. “It’s so hard knowing you’re growing up.”
“Mom,” he moans when she starts kissing his cheeks like a toddler.
I snicker until my dad grabs me and starts biting my cheeks and neck like he used to do when I was little.
When Travis and I escape, hitting the kitchen first for body fuel, I hear Shonda say, “It’s just so nice to see them getting along.”
Speaking of getting along. I look at Travis when we reach our bedrooms silently, my only company is the glass of OJ in my hand. I ask, “How do you feel about helping me improve my GPA?”
He blinks slowly, his hand on the door handle to his room. “You want me to tutor you?”
“No, not that, I just need somebody to help me complete my homework.”
Frowning, he folds his arms over his chest and asks, “What homework?”
“Every piece dating back to the beginning of the school year. Basically.”
“Jesus Christ.” His lips part. “Are you kidding?”
“Nope.” I try for a mischievous smile. “I got busy.”
Groaning, he hits his forehead on his bedroom door and closes his eyes.
“Come on, it’s the brotherly thing to do,” I beg. “Please?”
“Lead the way, you absolute nightmare,” he says and we both step into my half-decorated room. “Do you ever finish anything?”
“No, but I’ll try harder.”
He rolls his eyes but he’s smiling. “You’re the biggest procrastinator I know. Yet everything always seems to work out for you. What are your plans for after we graduate?”
“You mean if I graduate?” He grunts a laugh. I continue, “I don’t know what I want to do. I’m not really good at any particular thing, you know? Not like you with your science stuff.”
I show him the list of all of my assignments, and he picks up a pen and starts crossing some of them off while speaking. “Well then, what about nursing or something? You’re good with people?”
Shrugging my shoulders, I look at the amended list and frown at all of the crossed-out assignments.
“Those don’t count toward your GPA. I’m just narrowing down the list.” He helps me organize my books and we start with calculus.
He talks me through a few things I don’t understand with the patience of a saint and I wonder how I ever found it confusing to begin with.
“What about you?” I ask.
“I’ve been offered a place at Stanford. They have an amazing science program that could guarantee me a job at NASA one day.”
“That’s amazing.”
His cheeks pink. “I’ve worked really hard for it, you know?”
“I know you have, you should be so proud.”
We share a smile and the pink in his cheeks spreads across his nose. It’s kind of adorable. “I heard you talking to Mom in the kitchen before the movie last weekend.”
“Oh.” I swallow nervously. “And?”
“And you were wrong.”
Confusion sets. “About what?”
“I do like you. You said I didn’t, but I do.”
My heart warms as my skin tingles with his acceptance. “You’re not so bad yourself, Trav.”
We share a smile until he clears his throat and looks at the list. “We’re going to need more than a night for this, and more people.”
“Yeah, I know. I suck.”
“You certainly have your moments.”
I look at the extensive list. “Think I can have it all done before finals?”
“Definitely.” He doesn’t mince words, let me tell you. “You’ve just got to push yourself, and maybe stop partying so much.”
“Yeah, yeah, I know.”
“You’re smart enough, don’t underestimate yourself. You can do anything you put your mind to.”
“I’ll take your word for it.”
I glance again at the extensive list and slap my hands to my thighs. “So… off topic… have you kissed the science geek yet?”
“I haven’t seen her since the party and she’s not a science geek. She’s a math geek.”
“My bad,” I laugh and cross my legs.
He levels me with another look, and I have to fight the urge to reach over and brush his hair from his forehead. It’s so soft. I
still recall the feel of it when I mussed it yesterday. My fingers tingle from the memory. “You’re procrastinating again, Raven.”
The way he says my name… was his voice always this deep?
Of course, I ignore his question and ask my own, “Are you sure you’re okay with going camping this weekend? I kind of put you on the spot.”
Shrugging, he leans back onto his hands and clicks his neck. “Beats anything else I had planned.” Then he smiles, a rare sight and I marvel in it. “Which was absolutely nothing.”
I bring my forgotten OJ to my lips and take a small drink, it’s freshly squeezed by Shonda. There are some major perks being in this family. “I’m sorry your dipshit dad let you down. What’s the deal with him anyway? I know he cheated on your mom but…”
“It’s more than that,” he admits, glancing at the glass in my hand. I take a sip which pulls his attention to my mouth and I notice his eyes linger on my lips for a few seconds. It makes my heart skip a beat. I don’t know why, I don’t try to explain it either. “About a year before the breakup I caught my dad cheating on my mom.”
I cringe. “Shit.”
“Yeah, and I didn’t say anything.”
I’m not as surprised by this admission as I should be considering he’s a bit of a momma’s boy. “Why?”
“Because I believed my dad when he said it was a onetime thing.”
“Oh boy.”
He takes my glass from my hand and takes a sip, humming at the taste. “Mom’s OJ is the best.”
“Agreed. Continue.”
He takes another sip and clears his throat. “It tastes great with vodka.”
He’s trying to change the subject, so I put on the charm.
Wagging my eyebrows, I take my glass back and swallow a large gulp as a gentle breeze caresses my bare shoulders and pulled up hair. It feels nice. “I said continue.”
“Bossy.”
I give him a look and he smiles, which reveals such perfect, straight, white teeth and dark pink lips that crease at the edges. He soon sobers though and finally goes on, “If I’d told Mom then, it wouldn’t have hurt as much when she did find out.”
“I don’t understand.”
“His mistress got pregnant, Mom didn’t find out until she was eight months along and he left her for his new family.”
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