by Raquel Belle
That made Ashley laugh. “I hope he isn’t too chatty now. The strong, silent thing he had going was working for him.”
“He makes everything work,” Jenna said, dreamily. “I don’t care what we are. As long as we’re together. I love him. I want to marry him. I want to get his name tattooed on my ass because he owns it.”
Ashley erupted in a fit of coughing. “Damn it, Jenna, not when I’m drinking.” She wiped her eyes and giggled. “You are so much more fun now that you’re getting laid.”
Jenna giggled like a schoolgirl. Admittedly, she was a lot more relaxed and carefree. She didn’t stress about work as much. Thanks to Adam, her ridiculous insecurities about herself had taken a seat way in the back, and she doubted they’d ever resurface once she was with him. Her smile faded when uncertainty crept in. Would she always be with him? They had eased into an easy relationship, which was a huge step for Adam, but he hadn’t once said he loved her. And there was no way in hell she was going to say the words and scare him off … though …she’d come dangerously close a few times.
“Okay …,” Ashley said. “You were just smiling so hard that my face hurt, and now you look like a candidate for Prozac.”
“It’s nothing.”
“Nice try. You might as well spill now, since I’ll get it out of you eventually.”
Leaning back in her chair, Jenna let out a long sigh. “My love may very well still be unrequited, which means I’m in the same position I was as a kid. How pathetic.”
Draining her cup loudly before slamming it down on the counter, Ashley grunted. “You’re adorably naïve. Has anyone ever told you that?”
“Uh, no, and ouch, not a nice thing to say. I’m not naïve … anymore.”
“Sure. Of course the sailor loves you. He did a total 180 where relationships and commitment are concerned for you and only you.”
Jenna nibbled her lower lip. She wanted to believe Ashley, but until Adam said the words, she would continue wondering. “I don’t know.”
“I’m four years older, and hence, four years wiser,” Ashley said. “Your love isn’t unrequited. You’re not on the outside looking in. I see the way he looks at you.”
Jenna’s lips curved upward into a sad smile. “Oh, wise one, you may have gotten us together …”
“You two would have happened eventually without my little plan, I’m sure.”
“But, you may be wrong about his feelings for me. I know he cares about me, and he always has, but I’m not entirely certain if his feelings run as deep as love.”
Ashley’s lips quirked, and she grunted. “I guess time will tell.”
“Time will tell,” Jenna said, with a tight knot forming in her gut.
Chapter Twenty-One
Adam
“Alright, listen up old man because I’m only going to say this once.” You really don’t deserve this …”
“Adam,” Jenna hissed from one corner of the room.
Adam stopped and turned to look at her, confused by her outraged expression. He lifted a shoulder. “What?”
“A word outside, please,” she said sweetly though the smile she directed at Adam’s father.
He turned to peer down into a pair of metallic eyes, much like his own and sighed. “Give me a minute, old man.”
His father blinked once, and he took it as an “Okay.”
Jenna wrapped her hand around his wrist and attempted to drag him out of the room. He grinned down at her much smaller frame, amused by the fact that her fingers barely circled his wrist. “What’s the problem?”
“Adam …”
Once they were outside his father’s room, he leaned closer to her with a grin. “Don’t tell me you couldn’t wait until I talked with the old man to jump by bones, Jenna.” He attempted to grab her earlobe between his teeth.
She pushed him away with a palm on his chest. “Ha, you wish, and you won’t be getting any tonight or any time soon if you’re not nicer to your father.”
Genuinely alarmed, he pulled back to look at her. “I said I was coming here to let him know I forgive him. Not that the old bastard deserves it, and that’s exactly what I was doing before you interrupted. How much nicer can I get?”
Slapping her forehead with a palm, she hung her head and groaned. “What am I going to do with you?”
“I can think of a few things,” he said.
“Adam.” She let out a breath and reached up to palm his face. “Tell you what, if you can tell your father that you forgive him without glaring him, calling him old man or old bastard, and if you can crack at least one smile or even a half a smile,” she dropped her tone to a seductive octave that made his dick instantly stir, “I’ll make it worth your while.”
Despite the seriousness of the situation, Adam found that he wanted to laugh. Jenna made him happy no matter what, and he was sure that meant something great. “Why, Ms. Benson are you bribing me to be nice to my own father with sex? You bad girl.”
As anticipated, her face flushed, and her eyes widened. “Oh no, am I terrible?”
His soft laughter was reassuring, as he tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. “Not at all. Tell me something. Why do you care how I treat the old ba- Michael?”
“Well, I feel so sorry for him. He just seems so lonely in that room and so sad. Most importantly, I care because of you. I want you to resolve things with him and be okay.”
Adam sighed and rested his forehead against hers. “You have a heart of gold. You know that? Fine, I’ll make the effort to be nice. Hell, I’ll throw in a dad along with a smile.”
She laughed and batted his arm. “Good. Now get in there. But only if you really forgive him. You do, don’t you?”
“Of course,” he said, without hesitation. “What my father has done in the past no longer affects me. I’ve decided to let everything go.”
With an approving smile, Jenna let go of his hand. “I’ll stay out here this time. Give you two some privacy.”
With a single nod, he went back into the room and closed the door. He glanced back at Jenna through the window, and she sent him an encouraging smile and two thumbs up. Adam let out a laugh and glanced at Michael. “Beautiful isn’t she? She gives me the support I never even knew I needed.”
This time, he sat in the chair beside Michael’s bed. “Alright old … dad,” he corrected with a tight smile. “Let’s try this again.”
Michael stared at his son with apparent regret filling his eyes, and Adam smiled sadly. “There was a time when I hated you, Michael, and I’m sure you’re aware of that. I mean, I blamed you for my mother death’s and even Kevin’s.” There was a slight hitch in Adam’s voice when he mentioned his brother. He had worshiped Kevin, and he had joined the Navy just to honor his fallen brother and to somehow feel closer to him. “He wouldn’t have left if you hadn’t driven our mother to her death, literally, and he would still be alive. But, I don’t hate you anymore Michael. I don’t have the energy to hate you anymore because …”
Adam pulled in a breath. It was his first time saying it out loud. “Because I’ve found somebody to love.” He glanced over his shoulder. Jenna stood in the hallway, leaned against the wall. She wasn’t looking at him, so he was free to admire her for a while. Turning back to his father, he sighed. “She doesn’t know it, though. I’m an idiot, aren’t I?”
Michael’s finger twitched and he blinked twice.
Adam shrugged. “I’ve run head on into gunfire and explosions, and I’ve taken on men twice my size in hand-to-hand combat, yet I’m afraid to tell one woman that I love her.” He shook his head. “I’ve never done it before, Michael, professed my love to anyone. I want the moment to be perfect, but I don’t know how to make it perfect. What do I do? Buy flowers? Jewelry? It’s been driving me crazy.”
He stared into Michael’s eyes. “I’ll have to figure it out soon because I can’t afford to fuck things up the way you did.” With a wince, he apologized, “I’m sorry. Jenna wouldn’t consider that nice. She insisted I b
e nice, and I’m willing to give her anything she wants.”
Adam cleared his throat. “Where was I? Right. I don’t hate you Michael. I’m in a good place. I’ve adjusted to civilian life quite nicely, and the young lady standing out there had a lot to do with that. I’ve got a home. Finally. And a new job. Cyber security. It’s fitting for me, don’t you think? I was lucky to get in touch with a former Navy buddy who runs a security firm. I like the job. I get to use that degree I had on the shelf for years, and Jenna’s impressed so that’s a plus. She says I’ve always been a genius. Did I mention she’s good for my ego?” Adam laughed. “Anyway, I forgive you, dad. If a woman like Jenna can love a man like me, surely, I can find it in my heart to forgive you, and I do.”
He stared at Michael silently for a while. “Jenna doesn’t know that I know she loves me. I can read her like an open book even when she tries to hide things. She’s been holding back on my account because I’m too much of a coward to take the plunge.” Shoving a hand through his hair, he huffed. “Before, I let her know how I feel, I’d like to make things right with her brother.”
Michael blinked again, and Adam clarified. “Oh, right. I should have told you. Jenna is my best friend’s sister. I told him I’d keep my hands off of her. As you can see, I didn’t keep my word. I feel awful, not about my feelings for Jenna, not anymore, but I feel like I’ve betrayed Noah. It’s a fucking mess, Michael. If you could talk, perhaps you’d have some fatherly advice.”
Adam’s gaze lowered to where Michael’s hand rested over the white sheet covering his lower half. His fingers were twitching, as if trying to reach out. Before, Adam would have snorted and delivered a rude comment, but he reached out and placed a hand over Michael’s. “You’re right. It’ll all work out, whether I lose my best friend or not. I’ll keep you updated, old man.” This time old man was uttered as more of a term of endearment. “It’s a long drive from Virginia, but I’ll make the trip more often. Yeah, I decided to settle there.” He felt Michael’s hand move beneath his. “Of course, it was because of the girl. Let’s keep that between us, huh? Look at her. Don’t tell me you wouldn’t stay in Virginia for that girl.”
For the first time, he saw Michael’s lips twitch, as if he was trying to smile. “I know you like her. Don’t think I don’t notice how much you love when she leans close to fluff your pillow, you old hound.”
Standing up, Adam let out a breath, feeling unusually lighter emotionally. As it turned out, forgiveness was liberating. “I’ll see you soon, Michael.”
Walking out of his father’s room, wearing a smile, he met Jenna’s gaze. She smiled broadly when she saw his expression. “Looks like that went well.”
He nodded. “I had a whole conversation with a man who’s unable to talk, and it was wasn’t in the least bit weird.”
Rolling her eyes, she stood on the tip of her toes to kiss his cheek. “I’m proud of you. Let me go and make sure he’s comfortable before we go.”
“Fluff his pillow. He really loves that.”
She gave him a bemused look, and he laughed. A minute later, Jenna returned. “Ready to go?”
“Yes. I’m ready for your payment for me being nice to my father.”
“Seriously, Adam?”
“I’m quite serious. You said you’d make it worth my while. I expect payment in full.”
She scowled and tried to look stern, but he could see the desire already flaring in her emerald depths. “You’re incorrigible, Adam Hunter.” She feigned a weary sigh. “I suppose it’s only fair of me to keep my word and reward you.”
Lacing his fingers with hers, he tugged her down the hall. “We don’t have to wait. Maybe we can find a bathroom.”
“I’m not having sex with you in a health care facility.”
“Outside in a secluded corner?”
“No way.”
Adam let out a breath. “We’ll find a hotel along the way.”
“That’ll work”
Adam’s pace sped up, and he practically dragged Jenna from the building. She had to jog to keep up with him, and she giggled uncontrollably the entire way to the car. Before Adam drove off, it occurred to him that Jenna might want to visit her parents.
“You haven’t mentioned a word about seeing your parents.”
“I know,” she said.
His brows dipped into a frown. “We drove all the way here, and you don’t want to visit your family?”
The merriment that had been on her face just seconds before disappeared, and Adam’s heart dropped to his stomach. He knew what caused her mood to change before she said a word. “It’s just that if I visit mom and dad, Noah will know, and he’ll have questions. I don’t want to put you in a weird position with him before you tell him about us.” She paused and averted her gaze. “If you ever do.”
“You’re not some dirty secret I’m hiding, Jenna.”
“I didn’t say …”
“ I know that’s what you’re thinking. Look, I’ll talk to Noah.”
“Adam,” she said, “don’t feel like I’m pressuring you into anything. I’m fine. We’re fine.”
“No, we’re not,” he said. His irritation grew, but he was angry at himself not her. “You think you have to walk on eggshells around me because I’ve had an aversion to relationships my entire life. It’s not fair to you and …”
“Please, stop.” It was her eyes that pleaded with him that made him immediately stop talking. “This is supposed to be a good day, and I don’t want to end up arguing.”
“Jenna, we’ll have to deal with it sooner or later.”
She turned to him, attempting to hide her sadness, but she failed miserably. “I know, but it just hit me how awful I’d feel if I came between yours and Noah’s friendship, and what if we don’t …” Jenna swallowed. “I don’t want to deal with it today.”
Adam gazed at her for a long time, taking in her forlorn expression and feeling his own mood plummet into the dumps. He knew what she was going to say. What if they didn’t last? What if he lost his best friend only for them to go their separate ways? Without another word, he started the car.
***
It was one of the many peaceful nights Adam had gotten accustomed to. Months ago, if he’d been lying in bed, awaiting sleep, his mind would have been racing, torturing him with memories he’d rather keep away. It wasn’t like that anymore. Now, his mind was mostly at peace, and sleep came much easier, especially when he spent his evenings and nights with Jenna. He was usually much too worn out after several rounds of love-making to not sleep. With the additional comfort of Jenna’s warm body beside his, his eyelids drooped.
She was pressed so tightly against him, that he was afraid to move for fear of crushing her. It was a habit of hers, to cling to him while she slept. He teased her about it, but secretly, he loved it and found it hard to get comfortable when she wasn’t extremely close. He’d almost failed to sleep when she stirred and pulled away. She went still, and he listened for a few heartbeats before speaking.
“It doesn’t make sense that you pretend to sleep, Jenna. I always know when you’re awake.” He smiled and waited for her to erupt.
With an aggravated growl, she flipped over. “Ugh! How do you do that? A girl can’t hide anything from you.”
His shoulders shook with laughter, then he tried to suppress it. “Now, why would a girl try to hide anything from me? I thought we were beyond that.”
Jenna shuffled again and grumbled. “I hate that you’re a light sleeper. If Angel takes a step on the freaking carpet, you know.” Hearing her name, the cat meowed before closing her eyes and going back to sleep. When Jenna spent the night at his place so did Angel. In fact, Angel was now both their pets instead of just Jenna’s. “If I breathe differently, you know. If my eyes open, you know. What are you, Adam? You can’t be human.”
Lacing his fingers behind his head, he smiled serenely. “I know your bout of anger isn’t about me being a light sleeper. I’ll just wait until you decide to tell
me what’s bothering you. And be reminded that you can’t lie and tell me that nothing is bothering you. I know when you’re lying, too.”
“If you weren’t so good-looking, I’d strangle you in your sleep,” she said, making him smile harder.
“Good thing I have a pretty face then,” he said. He could practically feel her glaring at him in the semi-darkness. “I’m still waiting for you to tell me what’s wrong.” Her silence was cause for concern because usually, by his second insistence that she talk, Jenna would have started talking. So, he flicked on the bedside lamp to get a better look at her. His unease escalated when he saw tears clinging to her lashes. He sat up, eying her cautiously as if she were an IED waiting to go off. Her annoyance and anger, he could deal with. He didn’t know what to do in the event of tears.
“Jenna,” he said helplessly. “What’s wrong?” She refused to meet his gaze, and that’s when he really panicked. “Jenna, talk to me.”
“I don’t think I can do this anymore.”
He’d never been broken up with before or had his heart broken in the romantic sense, but he was sure the sharp pain zipping through his chest was a sign of his heart breaking. “What do you mean?”
“I hate lying to my brother, Adam. He called me the other day, and he was asking about you, and I panicked and lied to him. I told him not to ask me about you because we don’t talk, and when he asked why I couldn’t come up with another lie fast enough … I snapped and told him to stop interrogating me, and then I hung up.” The words tumbled out so rapidly it was a wonder he was able to keep up. “When he called back, I answered like an idiot, and he only had more questions that I couldn’t answer, so I hung up again. I know he’s wondering what’s going on. Oh, God. I’m going to be that girl, the girl who put a wedge between her brother and his best friend.”
Adam let out a breath, relieved that maybe she wasn’t breaking up with him. Maybe. “So when you say you can’t do this anymore you only mean lie to your brother? Right?”