Secrets of the Heart (Brie's Submission Book 20)

by Red Phoenix

“Child, what’s wrong?” Nonna asked.

  Nonna can see me…

  The joyous realization made Brie’s face screw up as she fought back the tears unsuccessfully. Choking on her words, she squeaked out, “I’m…just…so happy.”

  Nonno’s low chuckle filled the room. “You don’t look like it, Brianna.”

  Sir wrapped his arm around her waist, explaining, “We’re both feeling a little emotional right now.”

  Nonna beamed up at them, her smile as radiant as the sun. “Isn’t it a wondrous feeling?”

  Sir nodded, mouthing the words, “Ti amo.”

  Nonna laughed with joy, happy tears running down her face as she gently rocked Hope against her.

  In that moment, everything felt right and whole in the world.

  Because Nonna had recovered so quickly, they were able to return home the same day as Tono Nosaka’s performance with Autumn.

  Brie had been looking forward to it ever since Tono invited them at Christmas, but because of Nonna’s condition and her need for surgery, she’d given up any hope of attending.

  As soon as they landed at LAX, she picked up her cell phone. After ringing several times, she heard the message, “You have reached Ren Nosaka. Your call is important to me. Please leave a message. Mata ne.”

  Her heart felt lighter simply by hearing his voice.

  “Tono, we literally just made it back from Italy. Where and what time is your performance tonight? I’m so grateful we haven’t missed it. I cannot wait to see you both!”

  She smiled as she put the phone back in her purse. Tono’s skill with jute was always a thing of beauty to watch, but tonight was extra special because it would be his first public performance with Autumn.

  “What did he say?” Sir asked, walking up to her after grabbing their luggage off the carousel.

  “He didn’t pick up so I had to leave a message,” she answered, worried that he wouldn’t see her message in time.

  “I’m certain he’ll call back soon,” Sir said reassuringly.

  When they arrived home, Brie was surprised to find a big white gift box wrapped with a yellow ribbon waiting for them on their doorstep. Her curiosity piqued, Brie handed Hope over to Sir so she could pick it up. It was incredibly light for its size and didn’t have a tag to let her know who’d sent it.

  Walking into the house, Brie headed straight to the kitchen counter to set it down. “What do you think is in here, Hope?” Brie asked as she untied the large yellow bow. Lifting up the lid, she looked inside to find tons of tissue paper. Giggling, she searched through all the yellow tissue paper before finally looking at Sir in confusion.

  “There’s nothing in the box.”

  “Are you sure?” he chuckled, walking over to take a look inside.

  Brie took out every piece of tissue paper just to make sure she hadn’t missed anything. “Who sends an empty box with tissue paper?”

  “Lea playing a bad joke?” Sir suggested.

  “Let me check.” Brie pulled her phone out and shot Lea a quick text.

  Girl, what’s white and yellow?

  Lea immediately texted back, Your teeth.

  Brie groaned. Very funny.

  Shrugging, she told Sir, “I don’t think Lea sent it.”

  So…what’s the joke, girlfriend???

  With a smirk, Brie texted back, There isn’t one.

  Lea then shot a series of texts, one after the other.

  Are you playing with me?

  Brie…

  Stinky Cheese, don’t leave me hanging.

  GGGIIIRRRLLL!

  Brie put the phone down, laughing.

  “If it wasn’t Lea, then it must have been Anderson,” Sir stated. “Who else would leave an empty box and think it’s funny?”

  “It just seems so random. I would expect whoopee cushions or—”

  “Horse shit,” Sir interrupted her.

  Brie looked at him strangely. “What?”

  He smiled to himself, chuckling. “It’s a private joke between us.”

  She was just about to question him on it when the doorbell rang. It was immediately followed by pounding on the door and Rytsar shouting, “Let me in!”

  Brie giggled as she ran to open it. “Did you miss us?”

  The moment Hope saw Rytsar, she started babbling to him and jumping up and down excitedly in Sir’s arms.

  Rytsar smiled at her. “Just a moment, moye solntse. Let me greet your mother first.”

  He pulled Brie to him roughly, then placed a chaste kiss on her forehead. “Da, radost moya. You were missed.”

  Turning to Hope, he spread his arms out wide. “Come to your dyadya!”

  Her babbling grew more excited as Sir approached him and he struggled to keep her from falling as she squirmed in his arms.

  Sir smirked, handing her to Rytsar. “You’d think she missed you or something.”

  “Of course she did,” he said, kissing her on the cheek. “Everyone loves their dyadya.”

  Lifting her up, Rytsar told Hope how beautiful she was in Russian. She stared at him with a huge grin.

  “Wait! You have teeth now?” Rytsar exclaimed.

  Turning to Brie, he asked mournfully, “How can this be?”

  Brie smiled. “That’s babies for you. You can’t stop it. They grow like weeds.”

  Rytsar looked back at Hope, shaking his head. “Don’t listen to your mother. You are no weed, moye solntse. You are a beautiful sunflower…with teeth.”

  Brie giggled.

  Rytsar smiled at Hope and nodded slowly as he told her, “Promise me you will stop growing when I’m not around.” Hugging her to his chest, Rytsar glanced at the box and the tissue paper scattered on the counter. “Did you like my gift?”

  “That was you?” Brie exclaimed, laughing.

  “Da.” He grinned.

  Gesturing to it, Sir asked, “What’s the meaning of it?”

  “It’s my promise to you.”

  Sir gave him a questioning look.

  Rytsar glanced at Brie’s stomach before meeting her gaze. “I know you are trying for another babe.”

  “We are,” she confirmed.

  “I want you to know I will love and protect this new child as if it were a part of me.”

  “Even if it’s a boy?” she teased.

  Rytsar chuckled. “Da. It’s the reason for the yellow paper.”

  Brie looked at the box and the huge amount of yellow tissue paper with new understanding and loved the meaning behind it.

  “How did your trip to Russia go?” Sir asked him, motioning him to the couch.

  When Rytsar sat down, he let out a deep sigh. “It was not what I was hoping for, moy droog, but not as bad as it could have been.”

  “So, you weren’t successful in working things out with your brothers?” Brie asked.

  He let out a low grunt. “We have a long way to go before that, radost moya.”

  “What about Viktor? Is he doing well?”

  Rytsar’s face brightened when he spoke of the boy. “Viktor is doing well, considering he lost his mother so recently. Zoya is truly a woman of worth.”

  He looked at Sir. “She is far too good for the likes of Vlad.”

  Sir nodded, the somber expression on his face revealing his feelings about Rytsar’s older brother.

  “Despite the boy’s complicated history, Zoya truly has taken on the role as his mother. I will never stop singing her praises.”

  “That’s wonderful to hear,” she told him. Brie had been worried that despite Zoya’s good intentions, she would end up treating Viktor differently since he was a constant reminder of Vlad’s affair with Sasha.

  “As for my overbearing brother…he’s become more irritating, overcome with jealousy over the relationship Sasha and I shared. I cut him slack as I know he is still mourning her death, but I won’t put up with it for much longer.”

  “That is unfortunate.” Sir frowned. “How are you handling her loss yourself?”

  Rytsar t
hought on it for a moment before answering him. “Knowing the pain she was suffering, I do not mourn her death, but I mourn the future that the cancer stole from her.”

  Brie nodded, looking at Hope, her heart squeezing in pain. “It’s so tragic.”

  “What about your brother Andrev?” Sir asked.

  “Surprisingly, he reached out to me while I was there.” Then Rytsar snorted in disgust. “But, much like the situation with Vlad, it is not him I respect but his wife. I may have forgiven the bastard, but the rift he created is still too great between us.”

  Brie placed her hand on his arm. “I hope that it grows smaller with each passing year.”

  Rytsar looked at her gratefully. “I will keep chipping at it for Mamulya’s…” He suddenly choked up and had to clear his throat. “…for her sake.”

  The pain in his eyes and the catch in his voice alerted Brie to the fact that he was keeping something back. “What are you not telling us?”

  He shook his head.

  Sir gave Brie a look to suggest she should be cautious, but she was too concerned about Rytsar to let it go. “Please tell us.”

  Rytsar said nothing, smiling at Hope instead. Brie assumed he’d chosen not to respond to her until he stated, “You know all my mother’s things were burned in the fire?”

  “Yes,” she answered gently.

  “While at Andrev’s home, I noticed he had a photo of Mamulya. When I mentioned it, he instantly became defensive, taking the picture away from me and stating that I was not allowed to touch it.”

  He looked at Brie sadly. “I miss her smile.”

  Rytsar then snarled angrily, glancing at Sir. “So, I did the one thing I said I would never do.”

  It was as if Sir already knew what Rytsar was about to say. “You went to see your mother’s parents again, didn’t you?”

  “It was bad, brother,” he answered, his voice hoarse with pain.

  Knowing Brie had no idea what had happened before, Rytsar explained to her, “My grandparents were complete strangers while I was growing up. They never approved of my mother’s marriage and refused to have anything to do with my father or our family.”

  “That’s so sad,” Brie whimpered, shocked that they would abandon their own daughter and grandchildren.

  He shrugged. “How could I really blame them? Meeting my father was the worst thing that ever happened to my mother.”

  “But she had five children—their grandchildren. You weren’t to blame. You were innocents.”

  “It didn’t matter,” he chuckled sadly. “But, despite my grandparents’ estrangement, when Mamulya died, I felt a strong need to connect with them. I was lost in a world without her and needed to be with people who loved my mother as much as I did.”

  Rytsar’s frown deepened when he shared, “The moment my grandfather opened the door and saw who I was, he started shouting, calling me the Devil’s spawn before he slammed the door in my face.”

  Brie burst into tears, feeling the pain of that rejection as if she had been there with Rytsar that day.

  “There is no reason to cry, radost moya,” Rytsar scoffed. “Because he was right.”

  “No, he is not!” she cried.

  Rytsar hushed her, pressing her against his chest. “Da, he was. After that day, I decided I would never have children. In fact, if it were up to me, none of my brothers would be fathers. Why should they risk creating a monster?”

  “But you would be a wonderful father, Rytsar,” Brie protested.

  Rytsar looked down at Hope and smiled as he kissed her head. “I would much rather be a dyadya and die knowing I had protected future generations from the Durov taint.”

  “But what about your mother? Doesn’t she deserve to have her family lineage continue through you?”

  Rytsar grunted as if her words hurt him.

  Sir spoke up. “That is a decision only Anton can make. I know, because I’d dealt with a similar issue concerning my mother when I decided to father a child with you.”

  Brie looked at their beautiful daughter and told Rytsar in a strangled voice, “It’s like you are saying that Hope shouldn’t exist.”

  Rytsar hugged the baby tight against him, shaking his head. “Nyet. I would never wish that. I love this little girl.”

  Brie ran her finger through Hope’s brown curls. “But, don’t you see? Hope is proof that something good can come from evil.”

  “True,” he said somberly. “But I know there is always the chance I could spawn a replica of my father. After seeing the countless lives he destroyed, I am not willing to do that to the world.”

  Brie looked up at Rytsar sadly, knowing there was nothing she could say that would change his mind.

  “Do not mourn for me, radost moya,” he chided gently. “I have you, and moye solntse. I am content.”

  “But you deserve so much more!”

  Rytsar gazed at her with those intense blue eyes. “I know I am luckier than most. I found my soulmate and I am certain that Tatianna waits for me beyond. As long as I am still breathing, she and my mother will not be forgotten, so I forge on.”

  He reached out and stroked Brie’s cheek. “But that isn’t enough to make a life, is it? God knew I needed someone I could love but never own, and so He brought you into my life.”

  Brie fought back the tears.

  Rytsar’s gaze softened. “What we share is a beautiful thing.”

  She nodded, her bottom lip quivering.

  He grazed his finger lightly over her lip. “Because you are Thane’s devoted submissive, loving you does not dishonor my loyalty to Tatianna.”

  Looking down at Hope, his smile broadened. “And this little babe…I have never known such love.”

  It crushed Brie’s heart that he was purposely choosing not to experience the joys of fatherhood. That there would never be a miniature version of Rytsar in the world because of what his grandparents had said.

  It hurt her so much that she burst into tears.

  Rytsar laughed gently, wiping the wetness from her eyes. “Stop, radost moya. This is not a funeral. I came here to welcome you home.”

  Even though he was trying to hide it, she felt his suffering.

  Sir felt it, too, and asked the question she was afraid to. “What happened when you went back to see them this time?”

  Rytsar winced, sucking in his breath. “I’d hoped time had softened their hearts toward me.” He shook his head. “I couldn’t have been more wrong.”

  “Why?” Brie demanded. “You are just as much a victim as they are.”

  Rytsar’s blue eyes met hers. “Before my grandfather slammed the door in my face this time, he informed me that my grandmother was dead and told me to go to hell.” His voice broke when he added, “My grandmother died of a broken heart shortly after Mamulya’s death. She’s been dead for years.”

  Brie heard him mutter in regret, “I never got the chance to meet her…”

  When she reached out to touch him, Rytsar suddenly laughed, shaking his head. “No more of this sadness, radost moya. I am here today to welcome you home.”

  She nodded, forcing a smile.

  Rytsar needed closure. She could feel it emanating from him, even if he wanted to deny it.

  She didn’t know how or when, but Brie was determined to find a way to give that closure to him.

  Flying in Rope

  Thankfully, Tono called her back in plenty of time for them to make it to the performance.

  “I’m so happy you got my message,” Brie said when she picked up the phone.

  “I am, too. We’re both grateful you are able to make it, since Lea can’t attend.”

  Brie was disappointed to hear that. “I didn’t know she wasn’t coming.”

  “She came down with the flu a couple of days ago.”

  “Oh, no. Poor Lea!”

  “But she has promised to join us for our performance in Colorado next month.”

  “Good! Hopefully, I can tag along with her and watch it again. How
is Autumn doing, by the way?”

  He answered with a slight chuckle, “She’s nervous about performing in public, but I’ve assured her that once we begin, all her angst will fade away.”

  Brie envisioned Autumn swinging gracefully above the stage, bound in colorful jute, and squeaked. “Oh, my goodness, Tono! It’s finally happening. I can’t believe I’m going to see the performance you’ve been planning since you collared Autumn.”

  “Actually, it’s been even longer than that,” he told her. “I had a vision of it shortly after meeting her.”

  “So, this performance was fated.”

  “It was,” he agreed.

  Brie could hear the smile in Tono’s voice, and it made her heart feel lighter. She sighed internally as she imagined herself bound in his jute.

  “I didn’t quite catch that.”

  She giggled when she realized she’d let out an audible sigh. “Umm…I was just thinking about the magic of your jute.”

  “Ah,” he replied warmly. “If it’s fine with Sir Davis, we can arrange for a scene before I leave LA.”

  Brie felt pleasant chills on hearing his suggestion. “I will definitely speak to Sir about it. Hey, Tono?”

  “Yes?”

  “In case I don’t see you before the performance starts—break a leg.” She broke out in laughter. “It just sounds wrong, doesn’t it?”

  “It is an odd saying. However, I understand the sentiment behind it and will do my best to break both tonight.”

  Brie laughed, loving how easy their connection was. “Give Autumn a hug for me.”

  “I will. Until tonight, then.”

  Brie hung up her phone, smiling so hard that her cheeks hurt.

  Sir walked back into the room with Hope. One look at her had him asking, “I take it Tono returned your call?”

  “He did, Sir. I now have the time of the performance and the directions. We are good to go.”

  “Perfect. Unc told me we could drop off Hope anytime.”

  She wrapped her arms around him. “The only thing left then is to get ready.”

  While they were changing for the evening, Brie asked Sir, “Tono offered to scene with me while he’s here. Would that be okay with you?”

  Sir stopped buttoning his shirt and walked over to her. “I think that would be an excellent idea.” Putting his hands on her shoulders, he began to rub them. “I believe a centering session in his jute would benefit you greatly before your meeting with Holloway.”