Her Highland Secret: Steamy Historical Scottish Romance
Page 17
“Not at all,” Ella said as Milly nodded in eager agreement.
“I’ll come and find ye after the meeting and my bath,” Lucas said to Ella. “We have some important matters tae discuss.” Ella’s stomach flipped. She knew exactly what Lucas wanted to speak with her about. She was afraid of her response to him and catching the emotion in his deep emerald eyes, she was glad they wouldn’t have an audience.
“I’ll see you then,” she said, quietly.
“Aye,” came his response over his shoulder, as he, Magnus, and Kelly headed in the direction of the main hall.
As soon as the trio was out of sight, Milly turned sharply on Ella. “Are ye in love with me brother then, lass?” she asked earnestly.
Ella was completely taken aback by her blunt question, and tears began to pool in her eyes.
“Dinnae bother tryin’ tae deny it,” Milly said, grabbing both of Ella’s hands in her own. “I can see it in yer eyes when ye think no one is watchin’.”
“Milly, it’s not that simple,” Ella said. Was she so transparent that a girl she’d only met that morning could tell her true feelings with just a look?
“I dinnae understand, I see th’ way he looks at ye as well, can ye not be happy?” Milly asked. Ella wished beyond anything else that she could be happy and see the world as Milly did. Milly was so confident and optimistic. Before she’d been forced to leave England and the safety of everything she had ever known, it would have been exactly how she saw things as well, and she hoped that Amelia was still able to experience the world with such innocence. She squeezed Milly’s hands tightly. If only what she said were true. If only Lucas did feel the same.
“Lucas will be laird, it is his birthright and he’ll be a good laird for your clan. How can I get in the way of that? He needs a highland wife. Not an English woman,” she said sadly. “My being at Cadney only puts all of that, and all of you at risk, Evans will not stop until he has me, and he will bring a fight to your door.”
“But we will fight for ye, especially if ye were one of our own. Lucas would fight ‘til the death for ye,” Milly pleaded.
“I know, Milly, I know. But ‘tisn’t fair of me to ask it,” Ella replied.
“Milly! Milly!” Young Mattie came running into the garden. Ella was relieved for the interruption. “Mrs. Thomas sent me for ye, she needs help in th’ kitchen. I looked everywhere!” he exclaimed. “She said ‘tis urgent.” He looked up and saw the two women locked in intense conversation and gave Ella a weak smile.
Ella released Milly’s hands, “You should go, I’ll be fine.”
“Are ye sure?” Milly asked. Ella appreciated that she was unwilling to leave her without reassurance, but she wanted to go back to her room and freshen her dress and hair before speaking with Lucas. She was confident she knew the way.
“Aye,” she said giving Mattie a wink using the now familiar Scottish reassurance. “I’ll be fine. Go on, you mustn’t keep Mrs. Thomas waiting.”
Ella followed Mattie and Milly into the keep through the kitchens. The sweet smells of baking breads and puddings filled the air. Ella found that she was once again looking forward to her first evening meal in the keep. She broke off from the pair as they went in search for Mrs. Thomas and headed down a long dark corridor certain it would lead her back to her room.
As she walked up stairs and through corridors, she was impressed by the differences between Cadney Keep and Carlisle Castle. Carlisle was always dark and foreboding no matter the time of day. While Cadney had multiple windows carved into the stone, and light poured in from multiple places giving the keep an open, airy feeling. She found herself in the main hall and was amazed to see how large it was. The multiple long tables throughout looked to be able to fit the entire clan at one time, and comfortably with the two giant hearths already glowing with fire, even in the early afternoon. From the plaids she wore on their journey, and the coverings on her bed, she recognized the MacGille colors hung from large banners from the ceiling. It looked to Ella like a room that had seen much joy and much pain.
She took note of the multiple corridors that led out of the room and realized her earlier confidence with Milly about finding her way back to her bed chamber might have been impulsive. She had no idea in which direction she should head.
“Well you’ve come this far,” she said to herself, choosing a random hallway. Voices carried from further down the hallway, and she thought one sounded very much like Lucas. Deciding to head in that direction, if she came upon Lucas he could point her in the right direction. He would most likely laugh at her for getting lost in the keep, but she wouldn’t mind. If the last few months had taught her anything about herself, it was that she had a horrible sense of direction.
As she drew closer to the voices, she realized they were coming from a closed door at the end of the corridor. She had come upon the council meeting that Lucas and Magnus mentioned earlier. A horrible sense came over her that she had been in this situation before. Flashing back to that dreadful night when she heard her father gambling her rights away, a cool sheen of sweat covered her brow. She should turn back, no good could come from eavesdropping.
“”Tis not safe here for the lass, nor are our men and families as long as Commander Evans lives,” she heard Lucas say. There was no way she would be able to turn back now, she needed to hear what they were saying about her. She leaned closer against the cold stone, listening intently to men’s discussion.
“Aye, Aye, but there are other ways Laird,” the voice sounded weary and tired, Ella surmised it must belong to an elder. He had called Lucas laird, so they must have already voted. Pride welled up in Ella’s chest. She was glad he had accepted his role as the leader of the clan.
“For the life of me, Calum, I cannae think of any.”
“Laird, I think if ye care what happens th’ lass, ye can offer her the protection of the clan,” the elder said. Ella heard murmurs of agreement. She wondered how large the council was. How many families of the clan were represented?
“Calum, ‘tis why I wish tae send her tae the MacGilles in France. She’ll be safe from the bastard there.”
“Will she? Can th’ Englishman nae travel across th’ channel? Does she wish tae go?” This time Ella recognized Magnus’s voice. Of course she didn’t want to go. Oh, how she wished she could speak for herself in such matters. She shut her eyes tight to hold back tears of anger. These men, most of whom had never laid eyes on her were systematically and coldly discussing her fate. It was terribly unfair.
“She doesnae, but in time she’ll come around tae it,” Lucas said. Why was he arguing so hard against her staying? It was becoming clear to Ella that the feelings she had for Lucas were only her own. If he shared them, would he be fighting so hard to send her away?
“And if th’ clan approves and she stays?” Magnus asked.
“I cannae ask the clan tae fight for the lass. It doesnae matter what I want, nor what she may want. As a clan we have suffered enough loss at th’ hands of these men,” Did Ella detect a note of sadness in Lucas’s voice. She’d never meant for her presence to cause so much turmoil for him or the clan. She was torn between her anger at being discussed in such a way and her concern at the need to discuss her. This truly was an impossible situation.
“Yer arguments against, are nae strong enough, Laird. Ye have travelled well with th’ lass, and by yer own word she is good and kind, not tae mention ye wouldnae be standing here afore us, were it not for her skills in healin’ ye. Time for debate is over. As an elder of this council, I find it in me power tae order the marriage decree,” the older man shouted, and what sounded like wood hitting stone followed his words giving them a finality that made Ella’s head spin. Marriage, to Lucas. A murmur of agreement went through the room. Ella held her breath. Another marriage order instead of a proposal.
“Marriage decree!?” Lucas shouted.
Ella’s vision began to narrow, and blood rushed her ears. She didn’t hear anything further of the men’s
conversation. She should have been elated that Lucas would be able to marry her, and it sounded like the clan approved. Instead, she felt an overwhelming urge to flee. Once again Ella found herself at the mercy of men she didn’t know. Having no choice of her own in the matter.
Did she want Lucas to marry her because it was his choice or because he felt obligation, to her or to his clan council. She once again found herself listening in on a group of men more intent to treat her like chattel, property. There was no choice for a woman on her own in this world. Anger welled inside her. The door to the room opened and the voices grew louder. The meeting was ending. Nervous to get caught eavesdropping and too enraged to face Lucas, Ella needed to get out of there fast.
Accepting the title and role of Laird of Clan MacGille, was the easiest part of the council meeting. It was his concern for Ella and her well-being that had Lucas dreading his appearance before the council. It was the MacGille way for the laird to argue all of the sides of an issue that faces the whole clan. A laird could not be seen as driving the clan into danger based on his own wills or desires. What was best for the laird was what was best for the entire clan. He had to argue all of the sides of an argument before making a decision, even though ultimately the decision was the laird’s and the laird’s alone. When the oldest and wisest member of the council challenged him by declaring a marriage decree, Lucas felt a white-hot rage.
He knew it was true when old Calum told him his arguments were weak, but he was still forced to make them. He would not allow his people to fight to the death against Evans and his men unless they knew what they were agreeing to. But he would be damned if he would allow anyone to determine Ella’s fate without the lass being present to speak for or defend herself.
“Calum ‘tis not in yer power to make such a suggestion,” Lucas said, willing his voice to keep an even keel. “I’ll not force a marriage upon the lass. Ye made me Laird, and I accepted. I honor my duty by this clan, and if the council agrees, Ella Pearson will have our protection, without force or condition.” he shouted back. The men in the room, including Calum and Magnus smiled in knowing agreement. Hands began to clap. It was agreed. The new Laird had spoken, and the clan agreed. Lucas began to feel as if he had been played by his two most trusted advisors.
The meeting broke and he found himself trying to make his way through the men and their well wishes and congratulations for their new Laird, in order to get to the door. He needed to go to Ella, tell her she didn’t have to go to France, and the clan would protect her from Evans. He imagined her angelic look of relief. He also looked forward to breaking down the last barrier that stayed between them. He knew she still held onto hurt at his suggestion of being sent to France. He wanted her to know he didn’t want her to go.
Familiar blue skirts rushed away from the door to the council room and around the corner, heading in the direction of the main hall. He would recognize the move of the lass’s body anywhere. It was Ella. What the devil was she doing in the council corridor? She must’ve heard the talk that concerned her, and the talk of marriage. Dammit, he thought. She must’ve only heard part. Of course, she would be upset. It would’ve been easy for her to assume she was the victim of yet another forced marriage plot, when the reality couldn’t have been further from the truth. If she heard his anger, she would think he didn’t want to marry her; or worse, if she didn’t hear his anger she would think him no better than her father and Evans for choosing her fate for her. Realization dawned on him as he made his way after her. He wasn’t opposed to Calum’s suggestion of marriage to Ella. He wanted to marry her more than he wanted to draw breath, but he wanted her to want to marry him of her own choice. Hopefully it wasn’t too late.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Lucas was able to follow Ella through the keep until they reached her bed chamber door. There was no mistaking her mood, as she slammed the wooden door behind her. Torn on how to proceed, he swallowed the last bit of his fear and knocked on the door. No answer came.
“Ella, please, let me explain,” he begged, knocking again. “Lass tell me what troubles ye? Please?”
“Lucas, just leave me be,” she said through the door.
“I willnae, lass. Now let me in…” he said, nervously looking back and forth down the corridor. The last thing he needed was a maid to see the new Laird begging at the lass’s door. “Ella…” he said. “Yer being daft, lass, let me explain.”
Magnus came down the corridor catching the moment and shaking his head, “What troubles the lass?” he asked.
Lucas ran his hand through his hair, shrugging he looked at his friend. “Th’ lass isn’t familiar with our ways, she must’ve heard me arguing with ye and Calum against havin’ her stay.”
“What th’ hell was she daein’ in the council hall?” Magnus asked.
Truth was Lucas wasn’t sure if she was even aware of what she was doing in the council hall, but he couldn’t for the life of him think of any other reason she would run and lock him out of her chambers.
Ella whipped the door open. She looked up at him, her eyes rimmed in red and filled with fury. Och, she was definitley in the council hallway and heard incorrectly, he thought. “Ella, ‘tis not what ye think lass.” He tried reaching for her, but she swatted his hand away, turning instead to slam the door in his face. He stuck his foot in stopping her and she backed away, reluctant but allowing him entry.
“What do you want Lucas? To force me into a loveless marriage where once again I have no say as to my fate!?” she said.
“Ella, ye don’t understand. That’s exactly what I dinnae want. It wasnae like what ye heard, ye have to let me explain.” He looked at her, wanting nothing more but to take her into his arms, and explain everything. He wanted to take away all the hurt and betrayal she felt, wiping it away with his kisses. But her anger was unrelenting. Damn she was stubborn, he thought.
“You might as well send me back to Evans, at least then I would be able to go back to my own country and people,” she said, and Lucas had had enough. The mere mention of the bastard’s name was enough to send him into a rage, let alone the suggestion that he would send her the man, willingly. He fully entered the room and slammed the door hard behind him, locking the latch. He would have his say without disruption.
“I’ll not have ye even think such a thing!” he shouted at her, blind with rage. Evans was not an option. He would wage war with the entirety of England before he would consent to leave Ella in the control of the man who killed his father and would force her into an unwanted marriage, into an unwanted bed. She was his and his alone. No other man would touch her, while he drew breath, least of all Evans.
“What would you have me do then Lucas? I’ll not be treated like property and that is exactly what you and that blasted council were doing. Making decisions that affect my life without my input. I deserve to have a say in my own future. I would’ve never believed you would be speaking against that. It makes you no better than my father or Evans!” she shouted, as she backed away from him toward the back of the room and the bed.
No better that her father? Is that what she thought? His blood boiled. He struggled to bring his anger under control. Everything move he made, every thought he had since they arrived at the keep was what was best for Ella. Nay, every waking thought he’d had since waking in that blasted barn had been consumed by her.
“I’ll show ye lass, that I’m nothing like yer da or that bastard commander,” he said, walking toward her. He moved her against the stone wall by sheer force of his nearness. He looked into her eyes and watched her defiance as he pulled her face toward his. He brought his mouth down onto hers in a damning kiss, determined to show her exactly what he thought of her comparison. She fought him, using her hands to push against his chest, but he refused to let her go.
He felt the wetness of her tears and thought better of continuing the kiss. Anger or no, he wouldn’t force her into anything. She relaxed her hands against his chest, and his breath caught. No other woman had ever
caused his passion to flair like Ella. He used a free hand to caress the tears from her face, his own anger fading as desire rushed in to replace it.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, lass. I’ll never force ye intae anything,” he whispered. “I need tae explain what ye think ye heard.”
“The old man said…”
“Nay, I’m the Laird, lass, your ways and ours are not the same. A MacGille willnae force a marriage. There is no decree. Calum was tryin’ to force me tae make the right decision by ye and the clan is all.”
“You won’t force me to marry you?” she asked.
“Nay, ’Tis true, I want to marry ye, ‘twould be the strongest way to protect ye from Evans and his men. But I’ll nae force ye, ever. I want ye tae want to be mine of yer own free will.”
He leaned in and kissed her again, this time softly, searching for not just her lips, but also her acceptance. He felt the heat between them build the longer his lips were on hers. Her breathing became ragged, and surprising him she used her tongue to pry his lips open. Urging him to deepen the kiss. The relief she felt at knowing he would not force her into anything drove her passion. Her taste was rousing, and his throbbing cockstand was proof he couldn’t get enough of her nearness. He used one arm to stabilize her between his body and the wall.