“I guess.” Alexis wanted to be mad at them, but she knew they were right. “I screwed all this up and ruined my chance with Blake.”
“Don’t say.” Emily raised an eyebrow at her. “Try apologizing to her first.”
“You’re right.”
Emily smugly smiled. “I know.”
Content with that, Emily nodded before heading back down the hallway to help Harper dry her hair. Sophia sat smugly on the chair and crossed her long legs slowly and elegantly. When Sophia’s eyebrow raised, Alexis stuck her tongue out at her, making them both laugh. Alexis let out a content sigh as she pulled the blanket off the back of the couch and wrapped it around her arms.
Alexis didn’t need Blake to make her life complete; that would insinuate someone or something was missing, and Alexis had everything she needed in her life already. But there was no denying the ache in her chest over the fact she wished she had what Sophia and Emily had with each other.
Chapter 15
Blake paced back and forth in front of the apartment building for so long she was surprised a crevice hadn’t appeared on the sidewalk. She hated to bail on the game night offer Emily had extended. If Blake was going to be in town for a while, it would help if she had actual friends that wanted to include her because they wanted to be her friend and not because they wanted her money. But Blake couldn’t help but wonder if Alexis would even want her there in light of the way things had transpired between them the night before.
Alexis had shut down and shut Blake out so quickly that Blake hadn’t even realized it was happening until it was over. She was scared; Blake could see it in her eyes as the panic had taken over her body. Blake had wanted to pull her into a hug and let her know it was ok. But Alexis hadn’t wanted anything to do with her when she discovered Blake knew something about her past.
“Me and my big fucking mouth,” she mumbled to herself as she started to press the doorbell before stopping herself and pacing some more. If she could do it all over, Blake would never have pressed Isla to tell her about Alexis’s past. That way, she wouldn’t have been tempted to bring it up to Alexis. She’d been stupid to do that; Blake knew that in retrospect.
There was no denying that she was falling for Alexis, and until the night before, Blake was sure Alexis felt the same way. Her sweet personality mixed with her slight awkwardness made her thoroughly irresistible to Blake. She found herself wanting to get to know her better, and she also wanted to get to know Harper, which surprised her more than anything. She’d never been a fan of kids; she was more likely to avoid them like the plague.
“Screw it.” Pressing the doorbell, Blake tussled her hair as the intercom buzzed.
“Hey,” the voice was Emily’s, “I’m buzzing you in. Come on up.”
Blake headed up the stairs with the door unlocked and followed the sound of laughter to the apartment. It was deceptively larger than Blake had expected and featured a gorgeous spiral staircase in the center that led to an open second-floor balcony that overlooked the first floor. There was a large kitchen past the dining area where everyone had gathered in the apartment’s left-hand corner. Blake recognized Sophia, Emily, and Mason among the small group gathered around the kitchen island. There was another woman and two men that Blake didn’t recognize, and she waved at them all as she walked across the elegant hardwood floor to them.
“I brought this for you.” She extended the bottle of wine she’d picked from the liquor store on the way over to game night.
“You didn’t have to do that but thank you.” Emily quickly rounded the island and was at Blake’s side as she entered the apartment’s kitchen area. She took the bottle of wine before pulling Blake into a quick hug. “Everyone, this is Blake. Blake, this is Maddie, Patrick, and Jordan,” she pointed to each of them as she said their names, and they each waved at her. “And, of course, you’ve met Sophia, and you know Mason.”
“Bonjour, Blake.”
“Bonjour, Sophia. Comment allez-vous?” She prayed her high school French was still up to par. Sophia looked impressed as she picked up a glass of wine and handed it to Blake.
“Je vais très bien, merci de demander.”
“Bien sûr.”
“I like you.” A round of laughter from the group met the comment from Sophia.
“High praise for the newcomer.” One of the men, whom Blake thought was Patrick, tipped his glass toward Blake. He walked over and wrapped her into a bear hug as Blake held the wine glass out of the embrace. She was shocked by his overt friendliness, but something about it felt oddly comforting as well. “It’s great to meet you, Blake.”
“You too.” Blake took a step back as he released his embrace. “You’re Patrick, right?”
“Yes, and Jordan’s my partner.” He pointed to the shy-looking blonde sitting on the countertop. Jordan offered her a quick wave and a smile. “And Maddie is my twin sister.” Patrick grabbed Maddie’s arm and pulled her close. “Don’t we look just alike?”
“Oh, totally.” Blake played along as Maddie rolled her eyes.
“We’re fraternal twins, not identical.”
“I can see the resemblance.” She extended her hand out to Maddie, who firmly shook it. “It’s nice to meet you.”
“Yeah, you too.”
“Nonna!” Behind them, the front door opened, and Blake turned around in time to see Harper whiz right by her and go straight for Sophia’s arms. Sophia twirled the young girl around in a circle before kissing her cheek and putting her on her hip. It was clear their relationship was strong, and it made Blake smile.
“Hey,” Alexis smiled quickly at her before averting her eyes.
“Hey.” As Blake turned to face her, Alexis kept walking into the kitchen and greeted everyone with a hug and a kiss on the cheek. Alexis poured herself a glass of wine as they all made their way to the living room. Everyone had an assigned seat, it appeared, and Blake let them all find their spot before taking one on the ottoman pushed off to the side of the couch. Sophia, Emily, and Alexis sat on the sofa while Maddie and Mason curled up on the cozy-looking chair. Patrick and Jordan sat on the floor across from Blake. Harper walked over to Sophia and put her hands on her knees.
“Nonna, can I watch Frozen?” Harper tilted her head to the side.
“Of course, ma petite.” She picked up the remote off the end table and turned on the TV. After a few button clicks, the musical’s opening notes filled the air as Sophia adjusted the volume, and Harper made herself at home on the sizeable bean-bag style chair between Blake and the television.
“She’s obsessed with Frozen.” Alexis rolled her eyes as she picked up the dice off the Monopoly board game set up on the coffee table and rolled before handing the dice to Maddie on her left to see who would go first.
“Well, I mean, who isn’t?” Blake feigned confusion on who wouldn’t like the movie, which pulled a laugh from Alexis.
The game started with Sophia rolling the highest number – something that apparently happened often, if the groan that made its way through the group was any indication. It was easily the most intense game Blake had ever played. Houses and hotels covered nearly the entire board game, and people were beginning to throw money at each other after every turn angrily.
“Geez, you all don’t mess around.”
“No, we don’t.” Rolling the dice, Sophia let out a loud groan. “Fuck!”
“Language!” Alexis, Emily, and Mason snapped at her in unison.
“Geez, Soph.” Shaking her head irritably, Alexis pointed at Harper as she lowered her voice. Sophia held up her hands in protest as Patrick elbowed her in the shin. “Not in front of your goddaughter.”
“Sorry.” She stuck her tongue out at Alexis, who did the same in return.
“Can you children stop your bickering so we can finish this game?” Patrick held out his empty wine glass across the board game as Sophia picked up the bottle beside her and refilled it.
In a move that caught Blake off guard, Harper walked over to her
and held out her arms. Blake slightly hesitated as she looked at Alexis, who nodded in response. She picked Harper up and sat her on her lap as she handed the dice to Harper.
“Do you want to roll for me?”
“Sure.” With a nonchalant shrug, Harper tossed the dice onto the board game. Blake pretended not to notice the look that Alexis and Sophia shared. She also tried not to catch the way Alexis couldn’t stop smiling every time she looked their way.
Although Harper had little knowledge of the game’s strategy, she enjoyed ‘spending’ her money every time she got to ‘visit a hotel.’ Blake found her insanely precious and was thankful she’d chosen her to be her partner. As the game wound down, Harper fell asleep in Blake’s arms with her head resting on her shoulder.
“Do you want me to get her?” Alexis started to stand up, but Blake held up her free hand that wasn’t around Harper’s small back and shook her head.
“No, it’s ok. I got her.”
“Well,” Patrick tossed the rest of his money onto the board, “I’m out.”
“Ditto.” Mason followed suit, as did Jordan, Maddie, and Emily. Sophia held out as she looked at Alexis and Blake.
“Harper used all my money to stay at fancy hotels, so I’ve been out for a few rounds.”
“I’m too tired to care anymore.”
“Then I win by forfeit.” Sophia smugly collected all the money discarded on the board game and fanned herself with it. The move caused her to receive an elbow in the ribs from Emily. “You all are jealous that I always win.”
“Winning by forfeit isn’t the same as legit winning.” Patrick snarked off at her.
“That’s what losers say, darling.”
“And on that note.” Standing up, Patrick pulled Jordan to his feet as they all started to say their goodbyes. Blake stayed on the ottoman while they each walked over to her and gave her a quick hug goodbye. Once the room was empty except for Sophia, Emily, Alexis, and Blake, Alexis sat beside Blake and looked at Harper sleeping.
“I’m stunned she’s so taken with you.”
“Why’s that?” Blake tilted her head at her.
“She’s a very outgoing kid, don’t get me wrong, but she’s usually reserved around new people.” Alexis reached out and tucked Harper’s strawberry blonde hair behind her ear. “I can carry her across the hall. It’s past her bedtime anyway.”
“I got her.” Carefully, Blake stood, and her heart melted when Harper woke up enough to wrap her arms around her neck and legs around her waist. “Emily, thank you for inviting me tonight. I had a lot of fun.”
“You’re welcome anytime, Blake.” Emily wrapped an arm around her and Harper as she kissed her cheek. “We usually get together on Thursdays; it’s super casual, so feel free to come over anytime.”
“And it doesn’t have to be on Thursdays.” It was Sophia’s turn for a hug and kiss. “Our apartment is always open for friends, and, after your initiation tonight, you’re officially a friend.”
“Well, I’m happy to be considered friends of such wonderful people like yourself.”
“Oh, Blake,” Sophia’s drunken giggle was such a fun sound, “you flirt.”
“I think it’s time I get this one to bed.” Emily put her arm around Sophia’s waist.
“She wants to fuck me.” The fact that Sophia tried to keep her voice low but failed miserably made everyone but her laugh. Walking toward the front door, Blake felt Alexis’s hand on her lower back as they said final goodbyes to Sophia and Emily. They walked across the small foyer between the two apartments; Alexis led her down the hallway to Harper’s room. Alexis pulled down her sheets and duvet before turning to Blake, who was gently rocking Harper in her arms.
“You’re so smart for putting her pajamas on before game night.”
“A trick I learned after many nights fighting a sleeping Harper out of her play clothes and into her pajamas.” Alexis stood close to Blake as she rubbed her hand up and down Harper’s back. “She’s like her mama; once she’s out, she’s out.”
“Duly noted.” She winked at Alexis and resisted the urge to kiss her. Instead, she sidestepped Alexis and gently laid Harper down in her bed before tucking in the sheets around her. Considering it was her first time tucking in a kid, Blake thought she did a pretty good job. Blake leaned down and kissed her soft cheek before trading spots with Alexis, who did the same before they left the room.
Blake followed Alexis back into the living room, where she sat on the couch, pulling her legs up under her and propped her head up in her hand. Alexis was tired; she could see it in her eyes, but she was fighting sleep to stay awake for her, and Blake wanted to honor that the only way she knew how. Hesitating for a moment, Blake finally gave in and sat on the opposite end of the couch.
“You were great with her tonight.”
“Who, Sophia?” Blake joked as Alexis laughed, and it turned into a yawn.
“Harper.”
“She’s a great kid.”
“Yeah.”
“And has one hell of a mother.”
“Eh, she’s alright.” Alexis’s sad smile pulled at Blake’s heart.
“May I ask you a question?”
“Mmm.” As she leaned her head onto the couch, Alexis’s sleepy eyes studied her.
“Is Michelle Harper’s…” she let her words fall away when Alexis sat up and shook her head. Blake had wanted to know more about Michelle since Isla had mentioned her name, and she’d hoped to bring her up with Harper might help Alexis open up.
“No, absolutely not.” Alexis crossed her arms over her stomach and pulled them in close. “Harper’s all mine. Well, unless you count Sophia, because sometimes I question which one of us gave birth to her because those two are so much alike.”
“They seem really connected.”
“They are.”
“I love that.”
“Me too.” Yawning again, Alexis lowered her eyes as a sad smile formed on her lips. “And on that note, I wanted to apologize about last night.” She tilted her head to one side. “I may have overreacted.”
“Why?” Blake shifted her position so she could see Alexis better. “I mean, you knew that I liked you when I kissed you. Why was it such a big deal for me to say it?”
“Because hearing you say it confirmed it.” Alexis popped her knuckles. “With the kiss, I could chalk it up to a fleeting moment.”
“It wasn’t.” She firmly shook her head. “It’s not.”
“When you said it out loud, it all became real, and that scares me. But it was wrong of me to freak out on you like I did. You didn’t deserve that and I am sorry.”
Blake let the silence settle between them for a moment as she tried to think of what to say. The last thing she wanted to do was push Alexis. If anything, she realized that wasn’t something Alexis responded to. Scooting over to the seat between them, Blake covered Alexis’s hands with her own and waited for her eyes to meet hers once more.
“Do you like me, too?”
“You know I do.” Alexis’s voice was soft, low.
“Then what’s the problem? Can’t we see where this goes?”
“I have Harper.”
“I know.”
“And I don’t want people flittering in and out of her life.”
“We don’t have to tell Harper anything right now. I can just be Mommy’s new friend.”
“But what happens when you leave?” Alexis pulled one hand free from Blake’s grasp only to place it right back on top of Blake’s hand. “What happens when you get the call to go back for the show, or a movie, or whatever else they may want you to do? What then? Where would that leave,” her eyes searched Blake’s, “us?”
“I wish more than anything I could give you an answer to that, but I don’t know what the future holds.” Blake gently rubbed circles into the back of Alexis’s hand with her thumb.
“Do you think our lives are too different to ever work?”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean,
your life is very Hollywood, and my life is very much here. In the Cove.”
“Well, I hate to tell you, Lex,” she noticed the slight twinkle in her eyes as she used the nickname she’d heard her friends use, “but I’m going to be in the Cove for a while. I mean, I have a play I’m helping with, after all. Yes, our lives are different, but that doesn’t mean we can’t make this work if we both want it to work. After all, I like you, and you like me, and it would be a disgrace to both of us if we don’t at least see where this can go.”
“A disgrace, huh?” The shy smile on Alexis’s lips melted Blake’s heart even more.
“Yeah. We can just live in a state of grace where we understand that we don’t have things figured out but that we like each other and should see where this goes.”
Closing the space between them, Blake placed a soft kiss on her lips and was thankful that Alexis kissed her back. Blake ran her hand through her hair as she cradled the back of her neck. Alexis made soft humming noises that turned Blake on more than she would have expected under her touch.
Although every fiber in her body wanted to stay lip-locked with Alexis, Blake knew she needed to go. She needed to let Alexis get some sleep and process what they’d discussed. Pulling away slightly, Blake rubbed her thumb across Alexis’s lower lip.
“I should go.”
“So soon?”
“I have to leave you wanting more.” After one more kiss on the lips, Blake stood to leave. Alexis pouted as she crossed her arms like a kid having a temper tantrum. “Maybe I’ll see you tomorrow?”
“That can be arranged, I suppose.”
“Good.” Blake winked at her as she took a few steps backward toward the door.
“Why me?” Blake could see Alexis’s insecurity had made its way to the surface as she stood and walked toward her. She was nervously popping her knuckles and swallowed hard as she stopped a few feet from Blake. Her inability to see how gorgeous and deserving of happiness she was broke Blake’s heart. Blake wanted to slap whoever had broken her and tell them how wrong they’d been about Alexis.
State of Grace: A Moonflower Cove Romance Page 14