Amber was a woman used to getting her way, and with that face and body, he could understand why. He doubted that many men could say no to her. A few years ago he might have been one of those men. But now there was more than just himself to think about. Now there was Joachim’s heart on the line. He already knew his son was becoming attached to their houseguest. He’d accepted her from the first time she picked him up. Of course, there was always the obvious answer….
He could make it clear to Amber that it was time for her to leave. Even if she wanted to stay, her pride would force her to go. But the truth was, he didn’t want her to go. Although she made him feel all the wrong things, the point was, she did make him feel. It had been so long since he’d felt anything other than anger and jealousy where a woman was concerned.
So, if he wasn’t going to ask her to leave, the only other alternative was exactly what he was doing. He was pretty sure he could keep his hands to himself—even if it killed him. But would he be strong enough to resist if she touched him first?
Maybe, just maybe, if he could keep his distance, she would give up, and they could go back to the way it was before he saw her—all of her—in that sexy little thing.
Stop it! He shook his head in a desperate attempt to get rid of the visual image. He stood and wiped his damp hands on his jeans. He’d sequestered himself all day, but now it was time to face the music.
He headed toward the door, hoping Amber had cooked again. Her roast the night before was delicious, even after he’d mauled it with the knife in frustration.
Don’t think about her gorgeous smile, or those golden bedroom eyes. And whatever you do, don’t think about the way her cute little bottom looked in that negligee! He reached the door, put his hand on the knob and his mind was overwhelmed with a dozen images of Amber, most of which were erotic.
Amber in his bed. Amber standing at his stove cooking dinner. Amber on the kitchen table. Amber shopping in the mall. Amber against the glass store window, with her long legs wrapped around his waist. Amber, Amber, Amber.
Paul braced his head against the door. I’m doomed.
He went from room to room, looking for Amber and Joachim with no luck. The kitchen was quiet, not a single pot on the stove. He climbed the stairs to the second floor and found Joachim sleeping in his crib. But no Amber.
He went down the hall to her bedroom and knocked, but there was no answer. He wondered if maybe she was napping, too. He felt a chill run down his spine, as another thought occurred to him. What if she had been so discouraged by his rejection, she’d decided to leave? But she wouldn’t have left without saying something, right? Would she? He decided she would’ve never left Joachim alone. Somehow, he just knew this.
He was about to go back downstairs and check outside when he noticed the crawl space ladder at the other end of the hall. He looked up and saw that the door was open.
Paul went to the bottom of the ladder and called, “Amber?”
“I’m up here!” she called.
Paul frowned in confusion and started up the ladder. At the top, he found an open invitation. Amber was bent all the way over in a large cardboard box. He stopped, his eyes widening as he took in the little bottom pointing at him. Paul moaned.
“Did you say something?” she asked, never lifting her head from the box.
“What are you doing?”
With a flip and a turn, her tempting bottom disappeared beneath her as she sat with her legs crossed, glaring at him. “Do you realize Christmas is less than a month away?”
Paul had not thought about it. Not that it would’ve made a difference. He’d hadn’t really celebrated Christmas since he was a little boy in his parents’ home.
“Um, no, I hadn’t noticed.”
The frown on her face said that was not the right answer. “Not noticed? How do you not notice the birth of Jesus?” Her eyes widened in sudden realization. “Unless you’re not Christian.”
He smiled. “Yes, born and raised a good Catholic, but let’s just say it’s been awhile since I visited the confessional.”
Her pretty face relaxed. “Then, as I was saying, how can you not notice the birth of Christ? And this being your son’s first Christmas!”
Now it was Paul’s turn to frown. “He’s an infant.”
“He’s still a child, and this is still Christmas. Anyway, I found a few boxes of lights and ornaments.”
“Those aren’t mine,” Paul said, pulling the box over to examine the contents.
“They’re not?”
He shook his head in answer, surprised to see that some of the lights were still in new boxes. “No, I’ve been here less than a year, and I’ve never bought Christmas decorations. The previous owners must have left them.”
“See? It’s a Christmas miracle!”
He gave her an odd look, but said nothing.
“Well, we have enough lights for the windows, and we’ll need more ornaments, but the most important thing is the tree. We really need a tree.” She arched an eyebrow.
“What?”
“You have to go out and get a tree.”
“Oh, no.” He shook his head. “I’m not going anywhere tonight. I just spent the whole day catching up on case files. I’m tired, I’m hungry.”
She flashed her brilliant smile. “Great, me, too. Why don’t you pick up some burgers on the way back?”
“No, you’re not hearing me, Amber. I’m not going anywhere.”
Her playful grin turned seductive as she began to move across the floor.
Her golden eyes locked on his face, and Paul felt as if he were trapped in the gaze of a hungry tigress. “What are you doing?”
“Please, Paul,” she begged in a near whisper.
He felt his iron will dissolve into vapor in a matter of seconds. Even after spending a full day fortifying himself against her charms.
“Don’t do this to me.”
She was almost on him before he gave in.
“Okay, I’ll go get the tree! Just please, please don’t touch me.”
Anyone else hearing those words might have been offended. But Amber only smiled, because looking in his eyes she understood what was terrifying him. It wasn’t her touch, but his own reaction to it. Amber couldn’t help finding a certain satisfaction in knowing that he was suffering as much as she was.
Three hours later, the couple was in the living room, moving furniture around and trying to accommodate Paul’s trophy tree.
Exhausted, Amber sat down on the sofa, looking at the monstrosity he had dragged into the house a few minutes ago. “What were you thinking?”
The live tree was over eight feet tall and at least four feet wide, and had it not been for Paul’s double door entryway and cathedral ceilings, it would never have fit in the house.
Paul lifted the glass coffee table out of the way. “You said get a tree, so I got a tree.”
“Where did you go to find that thing? The redwood forest?”
“Very funny. Look in that bag—” he nodded over his shoulder “—and hand me the base.”
Paul was not about to tell her that he’d driven over fifty miles to find a tree he thought would impress her. It wasn’t until the tree lot workers began to load it onto his SUV that he began to have his doubts. The tree dwarfed his vehicle, and his was no small vehicle.
The strange looks he got from other drivers on the way back intensified those doubts, but there was no turning around. He tried to convince himself that he was doing it for Joachim, but in his heart he knew why he’d gone to such lengths.
Christmas was a time when people wanted to be with their families. But it was almost a month away. A month was a long time. Time enough for Amber to work up the courage to face her family, and time enough for him to convince her to spend Christmas with them.
Some part of him hoped that maybe, just maybe, if he could give her an incentive to stay…maybe he could have a Christmas like the ones of his early childhood. A fun-filled time with the people he loved.
Paul frowned to himself as he assembled the base. Love? Where did that come from? No, he decided, love had nothing to do with it. It was just with everything that had occurred that year, he didn’t want to be alone this Christmas.
“Do you think you need all this?” Amber asked, holding a doll-sized dancing Santa on the palm of her hand. She pressed a button and he began to shift his hips back and forth. She chuckled. “Kinda provocative for Santa, don’t you think?”
Paul smiled, and shook his head. Just then, Joachim’s mournful cry came through the baby monitor.
Paul went to get up, and Amber put up a hand. “Don’t bother, I’ll get him.”
He watched her leave the room. He loved the sassy way she moved. There was even energy in her walk.
It took him a few minutes to assemble the tree base. Afterward, he sat back looking at the mountains of bags spread in every direction.
Okay, so maybe he’d gone a little overboard. He just wanted to make sure he had all the making of a winter wonderland—California style. So, there would be no snow like a Detroit Christmas, but who missed freezing temperatures?
Amber came into the room, carrying a smiling Joachim in one arm and dragging his walker behind her.
Paul gave his son a wistful smile. Joachim’s little arms were wrapped around Amber’s neck. He looked so peaceful. Paul knew it was already too late for both of them. In a matter of days, she’d managed to wrap them around her little finger.
Amber settled Joachim in his walker, and he began to protest until his big brown eyes fell on the tree. They widened and widened, and his little mouth opened to form a perfect O.
Paul’s smile widened. How could he have almost missed this? Of course, Joachim needed a tree and decorations for Christmas. But he knew that if Amber had not mentioned it, he would’ve never thought of it.
Deciding he’d had enough rest, Paul went over and attempted to lift the heavy tree. He’d had a hell of a time getting it into the house, before remembering that it had taken two of the tree lot workers to wrestle it up onto his SUV. Now all he had to do was get it into the base, and it would stand on its own.
With sheer determination, Paul dragged the tree several inches and stopped to catch his breath, before dragging it a few more feet. He noticed Amber standing nearby. Her top row of teeth was biting into her bottom lip, and she had a strange look on her face. It didn’t take him long to realize she was holding back laughter.
“Think you can do better?” he asked.
Amber exploded in laughter, unable to hold back any longer. “No, no, you’re doing a wonderful job. Keep up the good work.” She gave the thumbs up, and he wanted nothing more than to wipe that smug expression off her face.
He dragged the tree some more until he reached the base, where he wanted to position it.
Amber cleared her throat. “Um, Paul, can I ask a question?”
“What?” he asked, standing upright and rubbing the sweat off his forehead with the bottom of his T-shirt.
Amber was temporarily distracted by the muscular expanse of smooth, olive skin exposed to her.
“What’s your question?” Paul asked, still annoyed by her humor.
“What?” Her guilty eyes shot to his.
“Your question. What’s your question?”
“Oh, um, why didn’t you just take the base to the tree, instead of bringing the tree to the base?”
Paul’s eyes narrowed on her face, but he felt his mouth tugging up at the end. “Now you tell me.”
“I would’ve suggested it sooner, but I was so enjoying watching you play the big, strong lumberjack.”
“You’re a brat, you know that?”
“So I’ve been told.”
“Okay, I’m going to set it on the base, but I need you to hold the tree steady while I maneuver it in.”
Paul lifted the tree onto the base, and Amber came over to take his position while he got down on his belly to check the alignment. “No, not quite.”
He stood again, and came up behind her. “Here, like this.” He put his arms around her and knew that he’d made a mistake. With her soft bottom pressed against his crotch, she felt so good, so damn right. Just like he knew she would.
Unable to stop himself, he leaned forward and pressed his lips against the soft, sweet-smelling skin of her neck, and Amber tilted her head to the side, giving him full access.
Paul felt as if his hands had taken on a life of their own as they snaked around her waist, pulling her back hard against him.
Amber released a sigh of satisfaction as she settled back against his chest.
The slight movement served as a trigger, and Paul’s whole body tensed as he realized what he was doing.
“Don’t fight it, Paul. Why shouldn’t we have this time together?”
His strong hands flexed and released over her flat stomach several times, as he tried to build enough strength to let her go. He had to let her go, if not tonight, some other night in the not so distant future. He wouldn’t lie to himself, he knew it would be much harder later than sooner.
Amber reached up and wrapped her arms around his head, pulling his lips down to hers. Her golden eyes were half-lidded, and he could almost read her hunger in them.
He just wasn’t strong enough.
He took what she offered, pressing his warm lips to hers until her lips parted beneath his, and her tongue came out to meet his with eagerness.
Paul twisted her body, needing to feel her pressed against him. Neither noticed the loud swoosh of the tree falling to the floor.
He pressed her body to his, shoulder to hip, noting that she was even the perfect height for his hands to rest comfortably on her small waist.
Paul devoured her mouth, reveling in her intoxicating taste. She smelled like a rose garden in the summer time, with skin softer than the softest rose petal.
Amber placed her arms over his shoulders. Her head lolled back as he ran his hands over her face and neck, following every inch of explored skin with a soft kiss.
His whole body was aching, and knowing there was a couch a few feet away made it worse. Wrapping his hands around her bottom, he pressed her up against the rising bulge of his pants.
She rubbed against him, and he felt the tremor through his whole body. Without another thought he bent, scooped her up in his arms and with five long strides reached the couch.
Laying her on the cushions, he came down on top of her, bearing his weight on his braced arms. He could’ve lifted himself some more, but he wanted to feel every inch, every shapely curve, every part of her. His mouth continued the exploration of her face and neck, even as his fingers worked to undo the buttons of her blouse.
Amber had no objections to anything he was doing. She wound her fingers through his loose curls and held tight, hoping she would last long enough to enjoy the entire experience. She already felt so alive, so vibrantly ready, so on the edge, one kiss in the right place would send her over the top.
Wrapping her slender legs around his waist, she felt him sink farther into her body. Even the coarse feel of the denim fabric could not disturb her euphoria, as her mind raced ahead and imagined the feel of him inside her. Every part of her body was ready for him.
Paul managed to get the blouse open, and wanted to thank the heavens when he realized she was wearing a front-latching bra. He smiled. He laughed out loud. And then with one flick of his hand, the bra fell apart revealing bronze mounds tipped in caramel.
His eyes came up to her face, and she returned his smile. It was all the go-ahead he needed. Paul swooped in, taking one full breast into his mouth. Amber gasped and arched her back, caught unaware by his intense passion.
Bracing her back with both hands, Paul held her to his mouth, feasting like a starving man. She was like warm honey on his tongue.
Without conscious thought, his hips gyrated against her, simulating what was to come. He released her breast, licking up his own juices around the outer edges and down into the valley between.
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He pressed his nose to her skin, breathing in the scent of roses everywhere. Paul felt as if his heart were bursting with joy, and all he wanted to do was hold her. He wrapped both arms around her waist and squeezed her tight, wordlessly expressing his longings, his need, his fear.
Amber understood him. As much as she hated what she must do, she knew if she did not speak up, she would be a liar and a hypocrite. She wasn’t sure what pain was in Paul’s past, but she would not add to it. Forcing herself to break the spell, she pulled back from him.
The sudden space between them felt cold and Paul started to pull her back to him, wanting her body against his.
But she put her palm against his chest to hold him. “Nothing is changed, Paul. You know what I want.” Her soft eyes asked the question before her lips. “Can you accept that?”
In the distance, on the outer edges of his lust, Paul could hear Joachim making happy, musical noises as be bounced up and down while playing with the toys attached to the tray of the walker. He didn’t seem the slightest bit interested in the grown-ups’ activities.
Paul looked into Amber’s eyes and read the truth of her words. She was right, nothing had changed. Regardless of whatever happened between them tonight, she would see it as nothing more than a holiday fling. When the time came she would leave without the slightest regret, and he would be left to the silence once more.
And what about Joachim? He’d already accepted her as a permanent part of his world. How could his young son understand when her sweet-smelling warmth abruptly vanished forever?
It was too much, too soon, but Paul could not stop the words from tumbling from his lips.
“Stay with me, Amber. I promise you will never want for anything.”
“Paul, I’m still in school—”
“You can go to school here! California has some of the best colleges and universities in the country, and there are annexes all over Orange County.”
“I hardly know you.”
His lips formed a thin line. “Hardly know me?” His dark eyes mercilessly examined her bare chest, and Amber became conscious of her vulnerability.
His Holiday Bride Page 10