Fall Knee-Deep In It

by Monica Walters

“Okay, baby. Call the police.”

  “Okay.”

  I ended the call. Rocco wasn’t a threat. I already felt horrible about calling the police on him the first time. Not wanting to deal with him didn’t mean I was afraid of him. I just didn’t wanna have to continue to break him. As I drove, I thought about Maverick and all the intense lovemaking I’d been getting. The way his dick had been caressing me and rocking me to sleep, I knew that it had to be made specifically for me.

  Before I got to the complex, I checked my rearview mirror, but didn’t notice anyone following me, thank God. As I was looking for somewhere to park, my phone rang. It was Maverick and I knew he was checking on me. I hadn’t told him that Rocco was still following me, which probably wasn’t a good move, but I didn’t want him to worry. “Hello?”

  “Hey, baby girl. You made it to your apartment yet?”

  “I’m looking for a parking spot now.”

  “Okay. Pay attention to your surroundings and call me back once you’re inside.”

  He was already worried. “Don’t worry. I will.”

  “I can’t help but worry. You’re my everything. As soon as I finish supervising this job, I’ll be there.”

  “Okay. See you then.”

  “A’ight.”

  Once I parked, I grabbed my purse, and no sooner than I’d gotten out of my car, I saw Rocco turn into the complex. I quickly hurried across the way to my apartment and unlocked the door. Thankfully, I lived on the first floor, so I didn’t have steps to worry about. Just as I was rushing inside, he yelled my name, “Yuri! Wait!”

  I closed the door and made sure to put the chain on just in case. While the complex had changed the lock, I couldn’t be too careful. Huffing, I fell to my couch. Shortly after, he knocked on the door. “Yuri! Please, just give a few minutes. I love you, girl. Please.”

  My heart was soft as hell and while I wanted to give in to him, I knew I couldn’t. I didn’t know where he was living or how he was making it, but I had to get through my thick skull that it was no longer my concern. Maverick was my concern. I stood from the sofa and let the sounds of the O’Jay’s fill the room. “For the Love of Money” was one of my favorite upbeat tunes by them. So, I knew I would get plenty done while that was playing.

  I made my way to the bathroom and got started, boxing towels and toiletries. I hated that I’d procrastinated packing. The only things I’d managed to get out of here were my clothes and the hygiene items I needed. Everything else, I should have packed since I wasn’t staying here. Ugh. However, by the time the song had played a few times, I was completely done with the bathroom. As I went to my bedroom, I noticed that Rocco still had a lot of stuff in here and that only irritated me. That was okay, though. I’d pack his shit and if he was still outside when I finished, I would give it to him.

  As I started, my phone rang. Shit. I’d forgotten to call Maverick. I answered, “I’m sorry, baby. I came in and immediately got started.”

  “That’s okay. I just wanted to make sure you were okay. Was he there?”

  “Yeah. He’s outside.”

  “Did you call the police?”

  “No. He isn’t bothering me. The door is locked.”

  “You sure? Call the police before you leave the apartment, Yuri, if I’m not there yet. Don’t try to talk to him. Call them.”

  “Okay.”

  “A’ight. I gotta go, babe.”

  “Okay.”

  I wasn’t going to call the police. Again, Rocco was harmless. If anything, he needed mental help and friends. Then maybe he could let me go… realize that our season was over. I went back to packing and hoped like crazy that he wouldn’t still be there whenever Maverick got here.

  Chapter Ten

  Maverick

  When I got to Yuri’s apartment, I was angry enough to spit nails. Immediately after parking, I saw her outside talking to Rocco. There were no cop cars in sight, which let me know that she hadn’t called them. Did she still wanna be involved with this dude? I watched them for a good five minutes before getting out of my car. He’d grabbed her hand and looked to be pleading with her. I couldn’t take just watching anymore. I got out and walked toward them. When her eyes met mine, they widened. I was two hours earlier than I thought I would be, so I assumed she thought she had time.

  Maybe this was why relationships never worked out for me. I picked the wrong women. But my gut told me that she was the one. That feeling was strong and I went with it, only to be let down later. As she watched me approach, her dude turned around and looked at me. His eyes narrowed as he said, “That was you watching when she called the police. So, this who you moved on to, Yuri? This who you with? How can you just forget about our love like that?”

  I didn’t say a word. I only stared at her. The longer she took to speak… to say something, the angrier I was getting. Rocco grabbed her arms, bringing her attention to him. “This who you left me for? Talk to me, baby. I’m sorry.”

  “No. I didn’t leave you for him, Rocco. I left you because of how you were treating me. I met him afterwards.”

  She looked back at me and said, “I’m sorry. My heart was just… I couldn’t call them.”

  “So you agreed with me to shut me up, then.”

  I nodded repeatedly. She lied to me, knowing she was gonna do what she was gonna do anyway. I started backing away as she said, “Maverick, don’t leave. Please.”

  I had to leave. My anger was starting to consume me. If it was one thing I couldn’t stand, it was being lied to. When I told her to call the police, she’d said okay. To me, that meant she was gonna call them. I turned on my heels and was heading to my car when she said, “Maverick!”

  “Let that nigga go. What kind of name is Maverick anyway? I’m here for you.”

  I turned back to them and walked right up on him. “This was a conversation that you weren’t a part of. Shut the fuck up before I shut you up.”

  He frowned at me, then smirked. I was sure he thought I wouldn’t back up my words, but he didn’t know me, and Yuri didn’t know this part of me, either. I’d hoped she never had to see it, but it was too late for that now. She pulled at my arm. “Maverick, no! Please don’t entertain him!”

  I swiftly turned to her. “You mean like you were doing when I got here? Like you’re doing right now? This was what I was worried about. To me, it seems like you’re not done with him. I don’t share shit, Yuri, and I’m not about to start. I pulled away from her as ol’ dude chuckled. When that happened, I couldn’t restrain myself. I punched him right in the jaw. “Let that shit be therapeutic for yo’ ass.”

  I walked away while Yuri looked stunned. My face was twitching with irritation and anger as I walked away. This was my fucking fault for getting involved with her, knowing she still had a nigga she was trying to get away from. But why couldn’t she just do what I asked of her? All of this could have been avoided. I swung in the air, trying to get the aggression off me. Too much anger had filled me and now I had a headache from hell. After getting in the car, I yelled, “Fuck!”

  Looking back in her direction, she was still staring at me. It was too late to be remorseful. She had to know that something like this would eventually happen if she didn’t do anything about him. He would have been arrested had she called the police. She’d already filed a restraining order against him, or at least, that was what she said. Starting my car, I peeled out of the parking lot and headed to Spec’s to get me a bottle of something. I hadn’t been this angry in a long time and the last time I was, I almost ended up in jail.

  My ex was fucking around on me and I walked into her house to find them coming out of the bedroom. Of course, she tried to lie her way out of it, but what made it worse was that it was my own uncle. He was only a few years older than me, so we were cool… like close. We used to hang out together. But my mama had always told me to watch his ass because he was underhanded. I didn’t find out what she was talking about until that day. I fucked him up in that house and Tika had called
the police.

  I was a hair away from grabbing her by the fucking neck, too. That was when I knew I had to learn to subdue my anger. I never wanted to do bodily harm to a woman until that moment. Cedric and I hadn’t spoken since that day. My dad was pissed. He came to the police station and picked me up. Thankfully, neither of them pressed charges. Cedric had gone on to become a college professor and Tika ended up moving back home to Houston. As far as I knew, my dad didn’t fuck with him no more, either.

  Walking through Spec’s, I grabbed a bottle of Tequila and another bottle of vodka. It was Friday and I was gonna get fucked up. I didn’t have shit to do this weekend, since Yuri would be busy and had someone of greater interest. When I got to the register, my phone vibrated in my pocket. After paying for my things, I made my way to the car, then pulled it from my pocket. I knew it would be from Yuri. Maverick, I’m so sorry. I don’t want Rocco. I just didn’t wanna see him go to jail. I want you. It was never my intent to hurt you. Please call me. Please…

  I threw the phone onto the passenger seat. My anger was still hanging around, even though I knew she was soft-hearted and that she was most likely telling the truth. Embarrassment was starting to creep its way in as well, because I was starting to feel like I overreacted. I couldn’t respond to her. My next move was to go home and drink all this shit away.

  “So, what have you been up to, son? How’s work? Life in general?”

  “Everything’s cool. Work is work and life is life.”

  I was tired as hell. There had been some kind of glitch in the timing of the traffic lights near the interstate and it had caused a wreck that the city would most likely be responsible for. We’d been working on repairs in the hot ass sun all day. I wasn’t so lucky to supervise this repair. My expertise was needed because it had the newbies and some of the veterans stomped. I’d earned my paycheck today. It had taken a total of twelve hours to get that shit fixed and if I had to repair another traffic signal next month, that would be too soon.

  My dad had called as I was on my way home for the weekend. I hadn’t talked to either of my parents in almost two weeks, but that was somewhat normal for us. We loved one another, but we weren’t really that close-knit of a family. I hadn’t spoken to my sister in almost two months. “Maverick, you sound bothered. What’s going on?”

  “It’s just been a really long day, Pop. I just wanna shower, eat, and go to bed.”

  “Mav don’t insult my intelligence. Your voice sounds emotionless. I know that sound. Is there a woman involved?”

  “Not one that I wanna talk about right now.”

  “Okay. If there comes a time that you do, I’m here. We’re about to go to dinner ourselves. We love you, son and we’ll talk to you soon.”

  “I love y’all, too. Be careful.”

  “We will.”

  I ended the call and was grateful for silence. It had been an entire week since I’d spoken to Yuri and I was depressed. So much so until I couldn’t stand to listen to the music I loved. My car rides had been filled with silence. My massage appointment was tomorrow, but I’d called the office and canceled it without rescheduling. I was doing my best to just get her out of my system, convincing myself that Yuri had the man she wanted.

  I’d been eating out all week and had gone out for drinks with Cameron a couple of times. He’d peeped game immediately. The entire two weeks that Yuri and I had been up under one another, I hadn’t tried to spend any time with him. We only saw one another at work, and he’d made fun of me in passing, calling me a sucker. Those two weeks, Yuri and I had been inseparable. We’d only been apart to go to work. She was practically living at my house, only going to her mom’s a couple of late nights to re-up on clothes. We couldn’t get enough of one another.

  This shit was the devil. I couldn’t drink it away and like Solange, I tried to put one in the air. Nothing helped. I prayed but that didn’t even feel sincere. To ask God to take her away from me… out of my spirit, was crazy as hell. I felt like the Lord gave me the side-eye. Despite the bullshit, I still wanted her. She’d called up until Tuesday, then everything stopped… no text or voice messages. God, I missed her.

  When I got home, I went straight to the shower. I was a funky-ass mess. If I could smell myself that strongly, I knew I had to be rank. After washing my body at least three times, I got out and headed to the kitchen in my towel, realizing there wasn’t a thing in the fridge to eat. Shit. The last thing I wanted to do was leave again to get something to eat, but that sun had worn my ass out today. Going back to the room, I got dressed and headed to Sertino’s for a sandwich and a smoothie. They had the best roast beef sandwich in town and that tropical passion smoothie soothed my taste buds every time.

  Once I got there and had made my way inside, I went straight to the counter to order and pay for my food. Another thing I loved about the place was its coziness. It had that coffee house feel to it and offered a relaxing atmosphere. As I waited for my sandwich, I heard a chuckle that sounded all too familiar. Sure enough, glancing to my right, I saw Cedric standing at someone’s table, talking. I rolled my eyes and planned to take my food to go, hopefully undetected.

  As the lady behind the counter handed me my order and I prepared to leave, a woman’s voice halted my footsteps of progression. It was Yuri’s voice. When I glanced toward my uncle again, I saw he’d taken a seat, but I couldn’t see with whom. I couldn’t have been hearing things. However, Yuri was so deep in my spirit, I possibly could have imagined it. But my curiosity got the best of me. I walked over towards the condiment counter so I could see better, and our eyes met. Yuri Danielle Joseph… all six-foot-one of her.

  When Cedric turned in his seat to see me, his eyes widened some and he looked back and forth between us and lifted his hands in surrender. I supposed he was trying to tell me that this encounter was innocent or that he had no idea he’d overstepped. Of course, he couldn’t have known. Technically, since I refused to speak to her, I’d freed her to do as she pleased. I couldn’t be angry, but I was. Seeing her entertaining someone else bothered the hell out of me because I missed her. I wanted her to be as miserable as I was.

  Seeing her smile and sound happy while talking to Cedric had left a bad taste in my mouth. “Maverick. How are you?” Cedric asked, standing to his feet.

  Yuri and I maintained our gazes and it looked as if she was barely breathing. She held a piece of me in her hands and for some reason, I couldn’t seem to reclaim it as my own… like it no longer belonged to me. I glanced at Cedric as he approached with his hand extended, then walked away. That was like pouring salt in the womb. He knew I couldn’t stand his backstabbing ass. Whether he changed his life or not… somehow matured from the bullshit of his past or not. I didn’t have time for him and at this moment, I couldn’t bear being in the same café as her.

  When I got in my car, I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, begging myself to just get over her already. Trying to convince myself that I was done with her proved to be hard as shit. My body wouldn’t allow me to forget how she made me feel. Just seeing her had paralyzed me for a moment, like I was stuck in wet cement. She’d worn her hair down today and all I could think about was how I’d grab a handful of her hair when I was knee-deep in her shit… her moans when she sucked my dick. I’d put her hair in all sorts of ponytails to watch those beautiful lips slide down my erection.

  Her perfect, pink-glossed lips had parted, reminding me of the times she’d been too greedy to wait for me to take my drawers off. There had been a few pairs of boxers that were stained with her lipstick. The straps of her tank top that went over her collar bone reminded me of the many times I’d kissed her there. The visions playing through my mind like a movie had my breathing on pause and for the first time since we’d been apart, I wished I would have said something to her. Told her how she’d hurt me… how I trusted her more than I had trusted any woman… even Tika. In a short amount of time, Yuri had exceeded my standards only to have it slap me in the face. I needed her to know
the damage she’d done and how effortlessly the shit seemed.

  When I got home, I threw my sandwich to the countertop and flopped on the couch with my smoothie. After another sip, I sat it on the coffee table and grabbed the remote to watch TV. With all the bullshit on the news lately, it would definitely keep my mind engaged. As I tuned in to it, I could only shake my head at the happenings. Senseless killings seemed to be taking over the city of Beaumont and as my mama would say, it seemed the entire city was going to hell in a handbasket.

  Grabbing my smoothie again, I took another sip. My mind tuned the news right out and went back to the gorgeous woman in Sertino’s… the woman that was once mine, that seemed to be enjoying the company of someone who wasn’t me.

  Chapter Eleven

  Yuri

  “I have to go.”

  “I’m sorry, but do you know my nephew?”

  “Nephew?”

  “Yes. Maverick is my nephew. His dad and I are brothers.”

  “Then why are your last names different?”

  “We don’t have the same dad. His dad died and our mom remarried the man that became my dad.”

  “Oh. Yes. He and I were involved.”

  “Oh, shit.”

  “What?” I asked.

  I could see that he and Maverick didn’t have a good relationship. Shit, Stevie Wonder could see the tension between them. When Mr. Harper had reached out to him, he’d walked away like he wasn’t standing there. “Some years back, I had an affair with his girlfriend. It was stupid and cold-blooded. He was maybe nineteen or twenty and I was twenty-three. We haven’t spoken since, but clearly, he hasn’t forgiven me for the lapse in judgment.”

  Oh, God. He probably thought I was talking to Mr. Harper romantically. Lady luck had not been on my side the past week. First Rocco, now Mr. Harper. Losing Maverick had been much harder than leaving Rocco could have ever been. My week had been filled with work, not only giving massages but organizing my new place. Even with all the work that filled my day, I couldn’t keep my mind off him.