Heartless King

by Hughes, Maya

  “Did you come to any conclusions?”

  “I did. Fern and Charlie offered to sign the Surf Shack over to me. And I got a job at the Speedman Clinic, a new rehab and physiotherapy clinic in Ocean City. But—”

  “If you’re planning this great escape from the city, then why are you here proposing?” My heart stuttered. And I wish I hadn’t asked the question.

  “You didn’t let me finish.” The corner of her mouth lifted.

  “Finish.” I crossed my arms over my chest, trying to keep my heartrate under control. It was pounding like we were in a sudden-death shootout after running for three periods straight.

  She looked down at her gloved hands. “I had a choice to make about what kind of life I wanted to live and who I wanted to let into my heart. I could follow the path I’ve always been on and do everything I could to protect myself. Continue to keep my circle small, never letting myself live out of fear of what I might lose.”

  Her throat worked up and down. “Or I could take a chance that the man who’d made me feel alive for the first time in years would be worth the risk. That opening my heart to you wasn’t opening me up to more potential loss, but to a love I hadn’t experienced before. You’re the most challenging, infuriating, stubborn, kind, caring, loving, and sexiest guy, I’ve ever met.” The way her voice softened with those last ones, and the lick of desire when she said ‘sexiest’ made a thrill rush up my spine.

  “I could say a lot of the same things about you.” Stepping closer, I tugged her gloves off her hands. “Losing you was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. Letting you walk—well, almost run away from me—it scared me, Imogen.” I cupped her cheek. “Because I knew you were it for me. This hasn’t been like any relationship I’d had before. We weren’t even official, but spending the rest of my life with you was everything I’d ever dreamed of, and the thought of losing that scared me even more than never playing hockey again.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  I silenced her with a kiss. All the sadness and hollowness melted away with the touch of her lips against mine. The tip of her nose was still cold, but I’d sure as hell warm her up. She looped her arms around my neck and held me close, like she never wanted me to let go, and I wouldn’t now that she’d shown me that our hearts sung the same tune.

  A round of applause and whooping broke through our moment.

  We turned our faces and met the gazes of the coffee shop customers. They’d had a front row view of the outdoor proposal through the large glass window, and we’d given them a much more satisfying encore.

  Imogen buried her face in my chest, holding onto the lapels of my coat.

  “You’re embarrassed by this? You were outside with a full choir singing our song and you weren’t this embarrassed.”

  “Does she still get the ring?” a woman called out through cupped hands.

  “That depends.” I spoke to the woman, but kept my eyes on Imogen.

  “On what?” Imogen looked up at me with her full pink lips still flushed from my kisses.

  “How long do you plan on wearing it?” I slipped the box out of my pocket.

  “And what if my answer is for as long as you love me?”

  “Then I hope you’re okay with forever.”

  I sank down to my knee and opened the box. “Imogen Marie Walsh—”

  “Yes!” She flung herself at me, peppering my face with kisses.

  “I didn’t even get to dramatically open the box or anything. I didn’t ask the question.”

  “And I didn’t want to wait another second.”

  “You got me there.” Standing, I slipped the ring onto her finger.

  Applause filled the coffee shop. The door behind us opened and everyone piled in. Declan, Heath, Emmett, and Ford. Liv, Mak, Kara, and Avery came in behind them, exchanging hugs and kisses with everyone.

  The choir arranged themselves in the doorway and along the front of the shop to sing our song again. I covered coffee for everyone for the rest of the day.

  Imogen and I slow danced surrounded by our friends and family. Holding onto her hand, I loved the solid edge of the ring pressing against my fingers, and I couldn’t wait to have one of my own as a reminder that my heart was out there walking, living and breathing in the world and lying beside me each night.

  It was non-stop laughter, talking, and music. We received congratulations from strangers, hockey fans, music fans, and people who loved good old-fashioned public displays of affection.

  In the taxi, Imogen’s eyes drooped and she rested her head against my chest. Resting my head on top of hers, I’d never been happier. We were going home.

  42

  Imo

  We said goodbye to everyone and promised to come by Emmett and Avery’s house for a double baby shower. It was time I stopped putting so much distance between myself and the people I loved and who loved me right back.

  In the back of the car, I leaned against Colm, feeling his steady heartbeat under my touch. There was still so much life to live and I needed him to know everything about me and my past.

  “I know you’re going to say you don’t need it, but I want to explain what happened that day at the rink. It wasn’t just about us. It was also about Preston.” I entwined my fingers with Colm’s.

  His body stiffened slightly before relaxing under my touch. “You were both each other’s first and only. I get that.”

  “I wasn’t his first and only.”

  “I thought you guys dated since middle school?”

  “We did.”

  “Was he sleeping around in elementary school? Sweet talking girls with juice boxes?”

  “No. It was in college.”

  “He ch—”

  “We were taking a break.”

  I laughed at the look he gave me.

  “A real one. Right after his diagnosis. He lost it and I get it. The life he thought he was going to live died when we left the cardiologist’s office. Everything he’d worked for disappeared in an instant. And I was a reminder of that.”

  He ran his thumb across my cheek. The tiny circles of the rough pad of his thumb anchored me in the present.

  “He was crazy to let you go.”

  “People do crazy things when they’re hurting and afraid. They sometimes hurt the people they love most. It’s not ever okay, but I understand it.”

  Colm kissed the side of my head and held onto my shoulder.

  “But things were great after that. He did everything he needed to do to keep playing and do the surgery after the season ended. They were still running tests and making sure they had it all right.”

  “Then he had his accident.”

  “Yes, and on the night of the accident,” my voice cracked. “He proposed.”

  Colm’s eyes widened. “No one ever said anything.”

  “No one knew. Only Avery, and I swore her to silence.”

  “That night on the beach?” I tilted my head to look at him through my watery gaze. “After you asked me and I freaked out? The police were at the Surf Shack earlier. They’d found my ring. I hadn’t wanted to wear it that night because it was so cold and my gloves were on, so I sat it on the dashboard to admire it. I didn’t even see the car that hit us coming. I was staring at the ring.”

  “Why didn’t you tell anyone?”

  “What would’ve been the point? Everyone was worried initially. The time never seemed right and he was getting better, so we thought we’d wait until we could tell everyone without the cloud of the accident hanging over us. And then—” I lifted my shoulders and breathed through the burn in my nostrils. “I didn’t want to take another piece of his future away from his parents by telling them.”

  “So you kept this with you all this time.”

  “I’m not the best when it comes to burdening other people with my issues. When you knelt in front of me on the ice—”

  He wrapped his arms around me from the side, hugging me to his chest. “You don’t owe—”

  “I do
, Colm. I need you to know everything. It was like I was back at the rink when he proposed, and all I could see was how he looked when I woke up upside down surrounded by glass and metal. Blood in his nose and the dashboard crumpled against his legs.”

  Colm dropped his cheek to the top of my head. “That had to be jarring for you. I know we were only talking about moving in. I’m sorry.”

  “Don’t be sorry for showing me what was in your heart. I’m sorry I couldn’t accept it.” I pulled away from his chest and ran my hand over his cheek. “I was so scared and the thought of losing you like I lost him, it hurt so much, but Fern and Charlie sat me down and asked me what kind of life I wanted to live. And I found the answer.

  “I’m ready now. That’s why I did everything I did today. I needed you to know that I love you.”

  “I know you do. And I’m okay with things now. I’ve never loved anyone like I love you. I can’t imagine what it would be like to lose—” He pinched his lips together. “I don’t even want to say the words. But I can’t imagine what it was like for you. And I know he was first in your heart, but I hope I can be the last.” Tears welled in his eyes.

  “How did I ever get so lucky to be so well-loved by two incredible men?” I brushed back a short lock of hair behind his ear and gazed into his eyes. “This isn’t about places. There is no first or second. No winners and runners up. Preston was my love who knew me better than anyone. And you’re my love who will be with me for the rest of our lives, and we’ll learn everything we can about each other and make even more memories. There’s room in my heart for the two of you and for this little one and any others we have in the future.”

  “You’re up for more kids?”

  “I’ve always wanted a big family. Growing up, I only had my stuffed animals and I know how close you and Liv are. I’d want at least that, if not more.”

  “Just when I think I can’t love you any more.” Colm kissed me in the way I’d come to learn was his way. Like he was afraid he’d forget the taste and feel of my lips, if he didn’t explore and devour every inch of them.

  The taxi arrived curbside in front of the brownstone. Colm opened the door to his house. Our house. I was happy to be home. We had so many new memories to make and joy to embrace together.

  Without a word, we went upstairs, not letting go of one another’s hands, like we didn’t want to break this connection between us until it was absolutely necessary.

  Inside his bedroom, which hadn’t become a hermit’s cave in my absence, he unbuttoned my coat. I unbuttoned his and we kicked off our shoes. Undressing each other, I let my hands linger on his body. I’d missed the feel of his arms around me and the press of his chest against my back.

  His fingers trailed over the curve of my shoulders, teasing the undersides of my breasts and resting on my stomach.

  “Your stomach popped.” He smiled his wide and infectious grin at me.

  It seemed overnight I’d gone from ‘hmm, did she have a massive lunch’ to ‘oh wow, she’s totally pregnant’. “I did.” I rested my hands on top of his.

  “Let’s get a shower.”

  He grabbed us a pair of fluffy towels and led me into the shower. We cleaned one another, like a ritual in new beginnings, washing away the fear and sadness of our past.

  The sexual tension was there, but this was beyond sex—although I won’t say I didn’t moan when his fingers sunk into my hair as he worked the shampoo into a lather. Bracing my hands against the wall, I let him work his finger magic and added showering together to the list of things we’d be doing a hell of a lot more often, at least until Baby Frost arrived.

  Even with the very present swell of his erection, Colm didn’t make any moves. Not to say that there weren’t a few lingering touches on my nipples or an extra thorough exploration of my pussy with a graze of my clit.

  As turnabout is fair play, I soaked his cock extra well, giving his thick mushroom tip some extra attention that drew shudders from him. But he didn’t take the bait. Reaching around me and placing a kiss on my wet shoulder, he turned off the water.

  Stepping out of the shower, he grabbed one of the towels, holding it out for me. He dried me off and then himself before getting us both into bed. I hadn’t thought I was tired after the intensity of the day, but as all the adrenaline wore off and the quietness of our lives settled in, I was beat. It had been an eventful day with the best end imaginable.

  He’d known before I had exactly what I’d need.

  Turning to face him, I dragged my fingers through his hair.

  He dropped his hand to my stomach. “I can’t wait to show you both how much I love you.”

  I draped my arms over his shoulders, locking them around the back of his neck. “You can start showing me right now.”

  Lifting my upper body, I peppered his neck and shoulders with kisses.

  His insistence at not having sex only made me crave it—and him—more. He’d never seen me as spun glass or fragile and I wasn’t going to let him pull that now.

  His hardened cock rubbed against my ass. I shifted my hips, letting his erection massage my clit. I shuddered, dropping my head back to gaze into his eyes.

  The burn of desire filled them and I couldn’t stop my smile. I’d tease him until he gave in.

  He groaned and jerked his hips forward.

  Didn’t he know how determined I could be?

  43

  Colm

  She wrapped her legs around my waist. Her heels dug into my back.

  My cock slipped lower, teasing her soaked opening. I bit back another moan. I was supposed to be letting her rest. It had been an eventful and emotional day. The last thing she needed was me releasing all that pent up tension that hadn’t left me since she’d walked away all our first night back together.

  “But we just got cleaned up.” Be a gentleman.

  “I don’t mind getting a little dirty as long as it’s with you.” She lifted her head and kissed me. Hungry and longing like we hadn’t been inseparable since I slipped that ring on her finger.

  “Aren’t you tired?” Don’t overwhelm her.

  “Not in the slightest.” She bit back a yawn.

  “We can pick this up tomorrow.”

  Staring into my eyes, she shifted her hips and I dropped my head back, another moan shooting from me. “I want it all tonight. No kid gloves. No holding back. No more walls, Colm.”

  The cold metal brushed against the back of my neck, spurring me on. This was my soon-to-be wife. The woman who’d gotten through to me when no one else had, and who’d lost so much, but was still brave enough to be here with me. And I’d make sure she never regretted it a day in our lives together.

  Shifting my hips, I sank into her velvet vise. Pure blissful heaven. How I had resisted this long was surely a marvel of the modern world.

  “Yes!” she shouted, her hips spurring me on.

  “I love the sound of that word from your lips. I can’t wait until your voice is hoarse from saying it.”

  She looked at me with sex-glazed eyes. Her fingers tugged at my hair and I dropped even lower, pinning her hips to the bed, sinking in even deeper.

  “You feel so damn good, Imo. Too sweet not to taste as often as you’ll let me.”

  “Anytime. All the time.” The words were on the razors edge of a keening cry. Her back arched, pressing her stomach against mine. Her moans were a symphony of pleasure and I was the conductor.

  Lifting one hand, I cupped her breast, rolling her nipple between my fingers.

  She hissed, low and hard, circling her hips and driving me wild.

  We raced together, pushing each other higher and harder until the cascade of electric brilliance rocketed from my toes.

  Changing my angle, I drove into her.

  Fluttering spasms gripped my cock. Under me, she tensed, burying her face in the crook of my neck. The nip of her teeth against my sensitive skin set me off.

  I thrust into her, burying myself as deep as I could with toe-curling r
apture firing through my system.

  Collapsing onto my side, I pulled her close, panting.

  Her hair fluttered with each exhale. I wrapped my arm around her and settled my hand over her growing bump. A not-so-small kick whacked against my hand.

  “Baby Frost is wondering what’s going on out here.”

  Baby Frost. The first of many to come.

  “Mom and Dad were just wrestling. Nothing to worry about.”

  Imogen laughed, her whole body shaking.

  Rolling off the bed, I grabbed a cloth and cleaned her up before settling back into bed.

  A contented sigh and she rolled over, facing me. “Look what you did, you got me all sweaty.” She laughed, walking her fingers along my chest.

  “I think you had a hand in this as well.”

  Tapping her finger against her lips, she looked up at the ceiling. “We seem to be remembering how this started in very different ways.”

  Her peals of laughter filled the room as I attacked her with my fingers.

  “Okay, I’ll admit it. I might have had a hand in it.”

  We settled into an easy silence, cocooned in body heat under the thick blankets.

  “I love you, Colm. Thank you for not giving up on me.”

  I buried my face in the curve of her neck. “I love you too, Imogen. Thank you for caring enough to not let me give up on myself. You’re stronger than you know, and I can’t wait to be the man at your side for as long as you’ll have me.”

  She held on to my arm wrapped around her. “It seems we both have a lot to be thankful for.”

  “I guess we do.” Even with everything I’d lost, the pain of that no longer overshadowed everything I did. It wasn’t a reminder of how things could’ve been, but a reminder of how every moment going forward shouldn’t be taken for granted and should be cherished. And that’s what I’d do every day I drew breath: I’d cherish my wife, children, and family because in uncertain times, those memories and looking to brighter days were all I needed to make it through anything.

  She was my strength, my heart, my love.