Sighing, I stood and gave her a hug. “Thanks for the help.”
“Any time.”
I left, heading toward Anna’s house. Hopefully she would have some insight into my situation. When I knocked at the door, Robert answered warily.
“Hey.”
“Hey, I was hoping I could speak to Anna.”
He cleared his throat and opened the door wider. “Right, well, she’s in the kitchen.”
“Thanks, man.”
I headed back there and gave her a hug as I walked inside.
“Hey, Will. It’s good to see you.”
“Hey, I was hoping you had a minute. Did…did Robert fill you in on what’s happening?”
“Yeah,” she grinned. “He may have mentioned a few things.”
The way she said that and how she was looking at me was weird. I stared at her, thinking she might clue me in on her thoughts, but soon realized, she was keeping them to herself.
“Right, well, see the thing you don’t know is that she kicked me out in the middle of the night. She didn’t need a man waking her up all night.”
“Wow. So, she’s not playing around.”
“Definitely not. The thing is, I need to know how to get her from hating me to wanting me to spend the night.”
“Honestly? She got divorced for a reason, and it sounds like the guy played a big part in that. It’s not like you’re going to be able to step in and repair the damage that was done overnight.”
“See, that’s the thing. She’s not upset with her husband or anything like that. She just doesn’t think that men and women belong together. She says we’re too opposite to ever live in the same house.”
“Oh,” she said, flinching back slightly. “Well, in that case, I would say enjoy her while you can and forget about anything to do with a relationship.”
“Seriously? You don’t see any way that I could persuade her to come around to my way of thinking?”
She glanced over my shoulder into the other room and then lowered her voice. “Honestly? Every woman feels this way, just some more than others. It takes years to get a man to do things the way you want them done. And by the time it’s over, one of you dies or something. It’s just not worth it to go through the training again. I’m guessing she got fed up before the training finished and decided that it wasn’t what she was looking for.”
“So, that’s it? I just give up?”
“Well, I’m not seeing how you can convince a woman that doesn’t want to live with anyone else that she should forget that and deal with your bullshit. Which, by the way, you would be amazing to deal with.”
I blushed slightly, nodding sheepishly. “Thanks. You’re just saying that.”
“Well, I sort of have to. You’re going to be my brother. But why don’t you just enjoy what you have going right now? I mean, can you honestly say that you know this woman is the woman for you?”
“Well, no.”
“So, you have what every single man wishes he could have. You get the sex and the fun times, but you don’t have to deal with the relationship. And when you get tired of her, there are no hurt feelings because you were never more than friends and fuck buddies.”
“Yeah, but what if I do this and I start to really like her?”
“Well…you’ll just have to figure out how to not fall in love with her,” she said with a nod. I frowned as she stood. “So, now that that’s settled, I have to get dinner on the table. Are you staying for dinner?”
“Yeah,” I grumbled. “It’s not like I have a woman that wants to cook for me.”
Charlie
I hadn’t heard from Will in almost a week. It seemed that he wasn’t quite as willing to go along with my no relationship thing as other men were. I didn’t understand it. Nathan loved what our relationship was. It was a relief for both of us to get what we wanted, have a good friendship, but never have to actually deal with the relationship crap. Then again, Nathan was used to working the same long hours. He knew how hard it could be on a relationship.
My ex had certainly made it clear that he wasn’t happy with how many hours I worked. He wanted me to work a nine to five job, which he figured I would do once I finished my residency. The truth was, I never wanted that, but he never listened. That was another reason we fell apart. Listening was something of the past. He wanted something he couldn’t attain, a woman to be at his beck and call.
“Any word from the ball player?” Nathan asked as we finished up for the day.
“No,” I sighed. “I guess he just couldn’t handle it.”
Nathan grimaced, kicking at the floor. “That’s a shame. He seemed like a great guy.”
“You’re just upset because you were never able to go to a ball game with him.”
He sighed heavily and I wrapped my arm around his waist. “It’s okay. I really liked him too.”
“Was he at least good in bed?”
I smiled up at him, not wanting to let him know how I really felt.
“Oh God,” he groaned. “He was better than me, wasn’t he?”
I held up my finger and my thumb, giving him the little bit signal. Nathan groaned, tossing his head back. “So, he plays ball and he’s better in bed.”
“Not better,” I said, slapping him on the chest. “Just different.”
“Different how?”
“I don’t know. What kind of question is that?”
“Well, a guy needs to know these things. If I can improve, I’m all about learning.” He pulled out a pen and pad of paper to take notes. “Alright, no matter how painful, just give it to me straight.”
“You’re being too dramatic.”
“Am I? Am I really? Because you’re telling me he was better than me. That doesn’t sound like dramatics.”
“Okay, if you really want to know, it wasn’t that he was better sexually than you.”
His brows furrowed. “If he wasn’t better sexually, then how exactly was the sex better?”
“The mechanics were all there. He thrust and licked and all that stuff at the appropriate moments.”
“Did you go through Master and Johnson’s four phase model?”
“Yes,” I rolled my eyes. “I was excited, I plateaued, I orgasmed, and I was resolved.”
“How many times did you climax?”
“Multiple times.”
His face continued to furrow in confusion. “So, was it his technique?”
“No,” I sighed. “He was everything a lover should be. The problem was, he brought out these emotions in me that I’ve never experienced before.”
He nodded. “Yes, I’ve heard of this happening, both in men and women. Though, I’ve never experienced it myself.”
“Me either.”
“Well… what did it feel like?”
I thought about it for a moment. “It’s hard to tell because you already feel so much during sex. I would say, I felt like I wanted to hug him.”
“Hug him,” he repeated.
“Yeah, like maybe afterwards? Like it might feel nice to have that.”
“Huh. Did this ever happen with the ex?”
I snorted. “Feelings? You know, I’m not even sure why I married him? I mean, we got along great for the most part, and there was a part of me that loved him, but no, I never felt anything other than release during sex.”
“So…when you say you wanted to hold him, how long are we talking? A few minutes?”
I quirked my head to the side as I thought about it. “I think I could have stayed all night.”
“Really?”
“I know, isn’t that weird?”
“So, you kicked him out instead,” he surmised.
“Well, let’s face it. He would have started snoring or shifted too much to my side of the bed. I wouldn’t have been able to sleep. This was the only smart thing to do.”
“And what if he calls you back?”
“What about it?”
“Are you going to snuggle the next time so you can keep ha
ving sex?”
“I mean, it’s not like he’s going to call me.”
He stopped me with a hand on my arm. “You should call him. Conduct your own experiment.”
“How so?”
“Well, if you really don’t think this is something that will last, you’ll most likely lose that feeling after the first or second time. Why don’t you call him up and go for one more date? If you still feel this way, maybe try one more time. It can’t last. I mean, you and I aren’t built that way. And if you go out with him and feel nothing, then you have nothing to worry about.”
“I suppose you’re right. What could it hurt?”
“Right? Free sex.”
“Wait, but what do I do if he asks to sleep over?”
“Either suck it up and let him sleep over, but on his side of the bed. Or, if you’re still feeling…feelings, try snuggling and see what happens.”
I blew out a harsh breath. “This seems like something that would blow up in my face.”
“And don’t forget to ask about season tickets.”
I rolled my eyes, slammed my locker shut, and walked away. It was time to make the phone call.
* * *
I sat in my car for a good half hour, just trying to pluck up the courage to call him. I was never in this position. If a repeat wasn’t wanted, I was fine with that. But this…this seemed almost like I was asking for more. And I never asked for more. There had to be a better way around this. The last thing I wanted was to make him think I wanted more than I was willing to give. If I gave in just a little, that was a slippery slope to a relationship. He would crack me open one crevice at a time.
But I desperately wanted to feel his arms around me again as he took my body and made it his. Oh, screw it. If he wanted to stay the night, I could allow that. Couldn’t I? Although, I had an early day tomorrow, so that wouldn’t really work. Plus, I was supposed to pick up Oliver after work. I couldn’t really afford to be a walking zombie. Hell, if he couldn’t accept my conditions, that was his problem.
With a nod, I dialed his number and waited for him to pick up. I almost hung up, but then he finally answered.
“Hey, Will?”
“Yeah.”
“It’s Charlie. I’m just getting off work, and I thought you might like to grab something to eat. I mean, if you’re not busy.”
“Uh…you know, I’m kind of having poker night with my brothers.”
“You could blow them off. It’s just one night, and you’d have me for the whole night.”
“The whole night, huh? Does that mean that I get to stay over after sex?”
“Well…I mean…I have an early morning, and then I have Oliver tomorrow night.” Silence met me on the other end of the line. “It just wouldn’t be very conducive to my work schedule.”
“Your work schedule. Right.”
“So, what do you say?”
“I say…I say that I love the idea you’re proposing. It works great for me in almost every way.”
“Great, so I could meet you in say…a half hour at the pizza parlor in town?”
“I said almost every way.”
I got that nasty taste in my mouth, you know the kind that says nothing will turn out the way you want. Everything is going in the shitter. “What can I do?”
“It’s not so much what you can do. It’s what you won’t do. See, I’m all about a one night stand or a friends with benefits situation. But what I can’t handle is getting kicked out in the middle of the night, which means making my night even longer since I have to go home. I could be staying the night with you and be refreshed in the morning, but I wouldn’t want to make your life harder. So, let’s call this what it was, a fun time, and call it a night.”
I didn’t say anything. I wasn’t even sure if there was anything I could say at this point. My plan that every guy agreed to had just been shot to hell. Where did I go from here?
“Look, I really liked spending time with you, and you were amazing in bed. It was really great to meet you. And hey, you still have Nathan on the side.”
He hung up without another word. I sat there in my car, watching the sprinkles from the impending rain dribble down my windshield. He hadn’t accepted. I had been so sure he would go along with this. Every guy I knew went along with this. Sighing, I put my car in drive and headed home to spend the night alone.
Will
I put my phone away and walked in from the front porch. My brothers all looked up at me, waiting for an explanation.
“Who was that?” Andrew asked.
“Charlie.”
“Charlie?” Josh asked, having missed our last conversation. “Who’s Charlie.”
“The person Will’s seeing,” Robert said, narrowing his eyes at him.
Josh looked at me and then looked around the table. Clearing his throat, he nodded. “So, what’s going on with Charlie?”
I sighed heavily. “What’s not going on. I was kicked out of bed the last time I was there. In the middle of the night. So, now I get a call, wanting me to come over, but the stipulation is that I still have to leave afterward.”
“So, what did you say?”
I sighed. “I said that I couldn’t do it. I can do the no strings and I can do the friends with benefits, but I can’t be kicked out in the middle of the night. It feels cheap, like I meant nothing.”
“I would stick to your guns, especially in a situation like this,” Eric said.
“What do you mean by that?”
“Well…” he looked around the table and then back at me. “Just, you know, that you said Charlie popped your cherry.”
I rolled my eyes. She had popped my relationship cherry, or what I had hoped would be my relationship cherry, and now even that was out of reach.
“I mean, I just wouldn’t want to be taken advantage of by the situation, is all. You’re not a piece of meat.”
I nodded. “So, you think I did the right thing?”
“I mean, if that’s what you think is right, then follow your instincts. No one should kick you out of bed in the middle of the night,” Andrew said.
“You do it all the time. And what’s with everyone giving me weird looks all the time? I was interested in a relationship, not a permanent three way.”
Joe’s brows furrowed. “Is that…something you’re interested in? A three way?”
I snorted. “What guy hasn’t fantasized about that? Am I right?”
Again, another round of weird looks shared between them. “Sure,” Robert laughed uncomfortably. “I mean, who doesn’t want that?”
His eyes flicked to Josh and he jerked his head and gave a strained look. I couldn’t figure out what everyone’s problem was. Did they not like Charlie because she kicked me out at night? Not everyone was perfect. Maybe I needed to redraw the boundaries of our relationship, but that didn’t mean she was a bad person. Hell, I slept around all the time.
“Am I missing something here? Is this because of Charlie? I mean, I didn’t really think you guys would be that judgmental.”
“No,” Eric said quickly. “It’s not at all because of…Charlie.”
“Then what is it? You guys are acting like I ran off and joined the circus.”
They all shared a look again, but it was Andrew that spoke this time. “It’s just…this is a big step for you. I mean, you’re really jumping in the deep end here. We just want to be sure that this is really what you want.”
“Why shouldn’t I want it? Charlie’s great, well, it would have been great. I mean, I’ve never felt this way around another person. I feel like I need to know everything.”
Robert sighed, leaning toward me. “Look, don’t pay any attention to us. We just don’t want you getting hurt. If Charlie is really what you want, we’re going to support you. And fuck anyone who thinks differently.”
Okay, that last comment was a little weird, but I was grateful for the support regardless.
“Thanks, man. I appreciate that.”
He clear
ed his throat and shrugged. “You know, you’re our brother. We love you no matter who you’re fucking.”
I snorted. God, they made this sound so dramatic. “So, any word on how Jack’s doing?” I asked, hoping to change the subject.
“He’s not talking to anyone,” Eric said. “Last I heard, he packed up Brody and headed out of town to his parents’ house.”
“He just left his job?”
“Corduroy said he called late one night and said he was done,” Robert said, shaking his head sadly. “He said he just put in for time off for him, but now Corduroy has to figure out what to do if he can’t get Jack to come home.”
“How are you and Carly doing?” I asked Josh.
He gave me a sharp look and shook his head. “Does that really matter? We got his wife killed.”
“Josh, you have to realize that this wasn’t your fault,” Joe said. “No one blames you, and when Jack gets past his grief, he’ll start to come around.”
“Yeah, and in the meantime, Carly and I can hear the whispers everywhere we go.” He sighed heavily. “I don’t know, maybe we should just find someplace else to go.”
“What?” Eric practically shouted. “No, you already left this family once. We don’t deserve that.”
“And the town deserves to have me stick around as a reminder? They all loved Natalie and it’s my fault she’s gone.”
“And what about your business?” Eric spat. “Are you just going to walk away from that? Away from the loan I helped you get?”
“I’ll figure it out. I’ll make sure you get all your money back.”
“You just started your life here,” I argued. “You haven’t even given your business a chance to take off.”
“Yeah? And who’s going to bring their car to a murderer?”
“You’ve got it all wrong, man. If people thought you were responsible, we would hear about it all around town. I haven’t heard anything like that,” Andrew argued. “You’re looking for an excuse to run.”
“Why the hell would I do that?”
“Because it’s all you know,” Eric said. “You’ve been running for so long that you don’t know how to stay in one spot and just be happy.”
Textbook Approach: A Small Town Romance Page 7