The Impossible Search for the Perfect Man

by Martyn, Susie

  We drive in silence.

  There’s far too much going on in my head and actually, I’m nervous beyond belief. That something else will go wrong, that my emotions will get the better of me. After all, absolutely nothing in life is certain. And however promisingly something starts, you can never know how it will end.

  At last, the drive is over and we’re here.

  Carefully I climb out. We’re at the tiny church near Ben’s house. I’d have sworn it should be the one in the next village.

  ‘Ready?’ asks Emma quietly.

  Just inside the door, there’s a tiny bunch of roses tied with ribbon, with a little card with my name on it next to them. Obviously they’re intended for me, so I pick them up and hold them to my nose. They smell divine. Then Emma opens the door. My stomach is lurching horribly.

  And suddenly I’m not sure I can do this.

  Inside, the church is packed with people, so many people, they’re standing crammed in at the back. I didn’t expect this. Gosh, they all look so smart…but then I suppose they would for an occasion like this. The flowers are beautiful and it’s lit with dozens of candles, so that there’s a warm glow everywhere I look.

  Emma nudges me. ‘Go on…’

  I start my walk down the aisle. This isn’t how I’d planned it at all. I’m overwhelmed - more than anything by the sight of my future husband, still battered and only just out of his wheelchair, but standing there in his posh suit and his pink tie, a huge smile on his scarred face as he waits for me to reach him. He’s been through hell and back and his face will forever be marked from that hideous encounter with Zac’s stepfather, but to me he’s the most handsome man in the world. And he’s looking at me as though I’m the only girl in the world for him. Well, I hope I am, because I’m marrying him.

  And after the ceremony is over, and months later than planned, at last I’m Louisa Fitzpatrick. And as I walk slowly out of the church arm in arm with Marcus, like the sun from behind the biggest, blackest cloud, the happiness I nearly lost comes bursting out of nowhere. A manic smile plants itself on my face and my blood zings round my body, as I want to jump with the joy of both of us being alive.

  ‘So much for a secret wedding,’ whispers Marcus in my ear, when no-one else is listening. ‘But I wouldn’t change this for the world…’

  And actually, nor would I. We wander across the road over to Ben’s, slowly, because Marcus can’t go much faster, but also to take in every magical second of this day. There’s a huge marquee in his garden waiting just for us and if I know our friends, quite a party. But just inside the gate, I stop. I’ve just remembered something I have to do.

  ‘What is it now?’ asks Marcus, surprised.

  ‘Just something, darling Marcus…’ I tell him. ‘It’ll only take a second...’

  Hitching up my fairy dress in all its ethereal glory, I kick off my shoes and throw them into the hedge. Barefoot in the cool, soft grass, just as I always dreamed of. Reaching up on tiptoes, I kiss his gorgeous face.

  ‘Okay,’ I tell him, grinning from ear to ear, wanting to dance and twirl forever. ‘Now, everything is perfect…’

  PS…

  ‘You do realise that Marcus has raised the bar about proposals don’t you? I mean how can anyone beat that?’ Ben asks me, after at least five glasses of champagne.

  Golly. But I’m not altogether surprised that Ben is thinking about such things as proposals. I think Marcus’s dice with death was a wake-up call for all of us.

  ‘Hmmm...’ I say in wondrous agreement. No-one found out about the torrential rain and the thunderstorm. They all think we went on a fabulous picnic. ‘It was very lovely and romantic…Awfully clever of him… Um, when are you going to ask her then?’

  ‘Will’s moving in with us,’ beams Karina, before she hugs me. ‘Oh, I just can’t believe this is happening!’ She hugs me again. I must remember to thank Arian for introducing us.

  Hmmm, another wedding on the cards. I can just see it…. And at the Amberley Stud no less…. Should be out of this world…

  ‘Your wedding,’ I say to a hyper-excited Emma. ‘Are you absolutely sure you want me to be your maid of honour, after all, you don’t want me to upstage you…’

  ‘Hey Zac, how’s it hanging?’ Marcus is surprised to see Zac looking so down in the mouth, today of all days.

  ‘S’alright s’pose.’

  ‘Something wrong?’ Marcus stands there, leaning on a walking stick, which he still needs, especially when he’s been on his feet for a while.

  ‘It’s all my bleedin’ fault. ‘Bout that fuckin’ wanker that beat you up. If I wasn’t ‘ere, it wouldn’t ‘ave ‘appened.’

  ‘Do you know Zac,’ says Marcus, looking serious for a moment. ‘Firstly it certainly wasn’t your fault, and secondly, that fucking wanker bastard, I am delighted to say, has been jailed for attempted murder. So all in all, there is definitely justice in that. And I am going to be fine. Now cheer up and come and have a beer.’

  ‘Hi Rachel. Have you met anyone who’s not too intense and not too frivolous yet? Only I might know just the person,’ I say to her cautiously, conscious of my husband’s eyes on me, drawing me back to his side.

  Husband… Hmmm, I already love saying that.

  ‘Oh. Thanks Lou, but actually, well, it’s early days but you know, I might have…’ Rachel’s ears are pink. Mine prick up with interest as I start to edge back towards Marcus. ‘I met him at a party. He’s been through the mill, he’s divorced and all that, but he’s so good looking and such a nice guy… Funnily enough, his name’s Arian…’