Nathan (Strauss Bear Shifter Brothers 0f Colorado Book 1)

by Brittany White

  Alanna brushed her teeth after her shower and came out to the room wrapped in a thick, fluffy cloth robe. John raised an eyebrow at her and held out the phone.

  “You can talk to your brother for a minute,” he said. “Sixty seconds. We’re counting. No funny business.”

  Alanna all but ran to the phone, cinching her robe a little tighter, and grabbed the phone from John. “Alex?”

  “Hey, sis.” Alex sounded exhausted, but not hurt. “Are you okay?”

  NO!

  “Yes,” she said firmly. She knew better than to walk into one of the bedrooms for a private conversation. John would want to hear everything she said. “I’m fine. Honestly. I’m totally fine.”

  “No, you’re not,” Alex said softly. “I can’t…this can’t happen—”

  “Stop it,” Alanna said quickly. “Stop talking. This isn’t your problem and I don’t want you to worry about it.”

  “What do you mean this isn’t my problem, sis!”

  “I just want you to be safe.” She shut her eyes as she stood there in the flawlessly decorated living room, her bare toes sinking into its lush carpeting. “I just want you to be safe and okay, Alex. That’s all that matters to me, okay? Nothing else.”

  “This is bullshit!”

  “It doesn’t matter,” Alanna said quietly. “Okay… I’ll be alright.”

  She hadn’t allowed herself to think about the reality of things before. Now, as she tried to convince Alex that she was ready to trade her freedom for his, it hit home. This was really happening. She would marry Rawley, becoming one of multiple bear wives, just one of a harem that Rawley had built for himself. She would have to do whatever he asked and have his children, simply because he was a big powerful bear and she had no recourse. She had no sleuth to protect her and shifters never went to human authorities no matter what. She was trapped.

  She felt as if the walls were closing in on her.

  “Do you remember when we used to fish at Crockett River?” Alex said softly.

  Alanna frowned at that. It didn’t seem like the time to bring up random old memories. “Yeah, of course…”

  “You said… I just remember that time you got caught in the rapids,” Alex said. “I think about that sometimes. I’ve never forgotten it.”

  Alanna felt a chill run down her spine. Alex was trying to tell her something without being obvious. But she couldn’t immediately think what it was. The memory seemed arbitrary. The river had been wide and stormy, in the middle of a mountain pass in Montana. They’d spent a lot of time in Montana until hunting season had kicked in and it had become too dangerous. They were always sensitive to the danger of hunters, considering their parents had been killed that way. The rapids had been vicious one warm day as they had tried to fish and the two of them had nearly been swept away until they’d managed to fight it and climb up some rocks.

  She couldn’t imagine what any of that had to do with Rawley though. It made her a little annoyed and impatient. This was no time for games.

  “I have to go,” Alex finally said, sounding slightly panicked. “Try to stay safe, sis.”

  “Wait!” But it was too late. Alex’s voice cut off and the call ended. Alanna took a deep breath and returned the phone to John, who smirked as if pleased by her distress.

  Alanna went to the window just to get some distance between her and John. She couldn’t think what Alex had been trying to tell her and it was going to bother her now.

  “I had your clothes sent to the laundry,” John said, staring down at his phone. “But Rawley texted. He said—”

  He was cut off by a knock at the door and he grinned at her. “Speak of the devil.”

  For one terrifying moment, Alanna thought it was Rawley at the door and that she had been cheated out of her few days of respite before he would come to collect her. When John answered the door and it was just one of the lodge’s porters standing there with several shopping bags, Alanna breathed a sigh of relief.

  “Rawley had some clothes and sundries sent for you,” John explained, not acknowledging the porter as he took the bags. He didn’t bother to tip and finally, the porter ducked his head and left, disappointed. “I don’t know why you’re being such a whiny bitch about marrying the guy. He sure takes care of his ladies.”

  Alanna snorted at that, but she managed to do it quietly and without attracting John’s wrath. She bit her tongue, keeping her rage locked inside. She had only let it out once, while she was still locked in the trunk, her hands bound behind her back, and feeling like an animal. Things had already seemed as bad as they could be. So she’d screamed and kicked and squirmed until she’d tired herself out and fallen asleep.

  John dropped the bags in front of her and looked at her expectantly. “So get dressed.”

  There were two bedrooms in their suite. John was apparently on orders to both keep Alanna in line and also to spoil her. That sounded like Rawley alright. It was more of that carrot and stick switcheroo again. First, he was charming you then he was going to kill you and if he was angry, it was your fault no matter what.

  Alanna mutely picked up the shopping bags and took them to her room. Black Bear Lake had a nice shopping district in the town below the lodge. He would have had stores deliver things. Alanna shut the bedroom door and sighed, unpacking the bags. The things weren’t to her style, not that it mattered. They were of good quality, though. There were designer jeans, cashmere sweaters, silk underwear, new boots, and a parka with a fake fur collar. There was even a decent make-up kit among other things. Alanna dressed in jeans and a cream cashmere sweater. None of the “gifts” mattered at all to her. It was all part of the gilded cage. Sure, he would spoil her, just like he did all his wives. In return, all she had to give up was her freedom.

  No problem.

  Alanna slipped on the boots and went back to the bathroom to blow out her hair in soft, glossy waves just to have something to do. But she was edgy, wanting badly to get out of the room. John had said she could hang around the lodge on her own. She decided to test that promise.

  “I’m getting a drink downstairs,” she said, hovering by the door.

  “Just charge it to the room,” John muttered, staring down at his phone. She was about to leave when he looked at her again. “Just don’t forget—”

  “Alex,” Alanna murmured. “I know.”

  Alanna sighed and she shut the door behind her with just a little more force than necessary. She jogged down the wide, carpeted staircase to the main floor of the lodge and it was hard not to look too long out the floor to ceiling windows in the spacious lobby at the mountains outside and wish she was out there in her most natural and freest state, running where she wanted to go and belonging to nobody.

  Booze, Alanna thought. Now.

  Alanna allowed herself to wander through the lobby. In the sprawling dining area, some people were chatting over late afternoon appetizers and drinks while others simply sat with their laptops or phones. Alanna bypassed the dimly lit lounge with its small tables and round booths and sat down at the bar with a soft sigh. A man was playing some non-intrusive jazz on a grand piano and there was something calming about that.

  “What can I get you, miss?” The bartender smiled kindly, placing a napkin in front of her.

  “Grey Goose,” Alanna said. “Neat. Put it on room 27’s tab.”

  The bartender nodded and went to pour the drink.

  It was a pretty good vodka, smooth and good chilled. It was her go-to when she felt like splurging a little. She felt like something a little bracing and as long as it was on the room tab, she might as well spend Rawley’s money.

  “The hot toddies are really good.”

  The voice came from a man one seat away from her. He didn’t move to sit right next to her and she appreciated that. She hated it when guys were presumptuous right off the bat. She looked up and felt herself flush slightly as she immediately recognized the handyman who had fixed their sink, the one she’d foolishly imagined might sweep he
r away.

  “Or the Kahlua cocoa?” he suggested, smiling. “With some bourbon. It’s fantastic. But then I always had a sweet tooth.”

  Alanna smiled to herself as the guy rambled about his favorite drinks. He had changed clothes too and cleaned himself up a little. He was wearing a thick, snug-looking sweater the same color as hers and he’d switched out his raggedy jeans for a nicer dark wash. His sandy blonde hair was combed back, but he still had stubble on his chin that gave him a handsome rugged look.

  He was nice eye candy and Alanna told herself she could enjoy the company of a man at a bar for a few minutes, even if she was now Rawley’s “property.” She certainly deserved it, she thought to herself.

  “I’ll remember that and try it next time,” Alanna said as she took a sip of vodka. “Just needed something to take the edge off.”

  “Oh.” The handyman looked at her in surprise. “Room 27, you’re um…wow, you look different.”

  “I wasn’t looking my best before,” Alanna said, rolling her eyes.

  “No no, I mean…you should see me when I have to work on the sewer line...”

  “Ha!” She chuckled and took another long swallow of the alcohol, relishing its initial chill and the burn it left as it poured down her throat. “I’ll take your word for it.”

  “It’s not pretty,” he mumbled, then laughed in a way that made his whole body move. He threw his head back and his amusement came from his gut, the sound of it deep and warm. It made Alanna smile.

  He stuck out his hand to shake hers. “I’m Nathan.”

  Save me, Alanna thought again. But she only shook his hand. Yet when she raised her eyes, her heartbeat picked up just a bit. Nathan had a stubbled lantern jaw and kind blue eyes. He was big and broad and there was the subtle scent of Old Spice under the musk of his bear. It was heady and arousing and Alanna just smiled and nodded.

  “I’m Alanna,” he said simply.

  She didn’t let the handshake linger and reminded herself not to flirt too much. That could get dangerous. Mostly for him. The very last thing she needed was Rawley returning and deciding he needed to kick the Black Bear Lodge’s handyman’s ass.

  “You clean up nice,” Nathan said, tossing her a wink.

  Alanna blushed under the attention, but she couldn’t help enjoying it. There was something warm and welcoming in the way he talked even when he was obviously hitting on her just a bit. Rawley, when she had first met him, had come across too slick and forceful. He thought it was sexy.

  “I want what I want and I want you,” he said. “I always get what I want. Just ask my other five wives.”

  That night at his party, she’d hardly known what was happening before she was being swept along to one of his houses, also full of people. He’d shown her all his stupid luxuries and promised her the world and when she’d laughed and said “no thank you,” he’d slapped her across the face and had her locked in a cell. She’d escaped a few days later out of pure luck when one of his security men had come to bring her food while he was drunk and left the cell door unlocked. She’d escaped the house and run without looking back. But eventually, John had caught up with her.

  “You alright, Alanna?” Nathan said.

  Alanna took another sip of her Grey Goose and soaked up the sound of his voice, the scent of him, the way his hair was just a little too long and messy, and the way his arms filled out the sleeves of his sweater.

  “Rough couple of weeks,” Alanna said. “I’m fine. Thank you.”

  “You want to talk about it?” Nathan said. He looked right at her, his attention focussed entirely on whatever she might have to say.

  She wondered what would happen if she asked him for help, but the thought of an innocent man being hurt on her behalf would make her feel worse about everything and she shoved that thought away.

  “No,” Alanna whispered. She leaned on her hand and sipped her Grey Goose, refusing to look away from him. “But tell me about yourself. Distract me. How long have you worked here? Is it a good job for a bear?”

  “It’s a good job for this bear,” Nathan said. He motioned to the bartender and a locally brewed IPA was brought to him without him having to ask. “I run the place with my brothers actually. We each own an equal stake. My little bro Eric is the concierge, Cody runs the kitchen, and Connor’s in charge. I’m the handyman, obviously. To be honest with you, we really don’t need to be working. But we like to keep busy and we enjoy the place.”

  “Wait…” Alanna grinned, disbelieving. “You own a quarter of this place and you’re already rich to begin with, but you’re the handyman?”

  “I like being the handyman,” Nathan said. “I wear a cool tool belt, I don’t have too much work to do. The rest of the time I can go run and fish in the woods or read or ski or, ya know, bother Connor. It’s just enough work.”

  “Just enough work for what?” Alanna said.

  “To keep me out of trouble,” Nathan said. “I’ve been in trouble. Didn’t much like it. Don’t plan on getting into it again. It was when I was younger.” He shrugged and sipped his beer. “I fell in with the wrong kind of shifter. He thought I was like him. But I wasn’t. Anyway…I like to keep busy enough to keep trouble like that far away.”

  “Right,” Alanna murmured, but all that warmth and good feeling rushed away again like a tide.

  Nathan was clearly a good man and a good bear. He didn’t want trouble in his life.

  That’s all I am, Alanna thought. Whether it was her fault or not, all she could promise was just that: trouble.

  She was grasping at straws to even think of asking for help from the hotel handyman. It would be more useful to just resign herself to her fate and get used to it.

  “Can I ask you a question?” Nathan said. He didn’t wait for an answer, which was wise because she would have said no. “Are you with the man you’re staying with? I only ask because you don’t seem like a couple.”

  “It’s a business relationship.” She leaned on her hand and looked up at Nathan who’d moved over one seat toward her since they were talking now. “That’s all.”

  “Okay…” Nathan rubbed his chin. He looked like he was fighting the urge to ask a million more questions. “You don’t like him, do you?”

  “No.” She had finished her drink and she ordered another, refusing Nathan’s offer to put it on the house. It was Rawley’s money. She’d just as soon waste it.

  “Are you...in trouble?” he asked tentatively.

  “Don’t you worry about me,” she said, tapping the bar. He looked down at her fingernails, blunt and unmanicured. Bear or not, a man like him was probably used to women with money. Women with perfect nails. On impulse, she hid her hand in her lap. “I’m not getting some cute handyman involved in my nonsense.”

  Save me, she thought again. But it was only a thought. He was a kind stranger and that was all. And rescues by men like him were the stuff of fantasies.

  “Cute, huh?” Nathan bit his lip and tossed her wink.

  Alanna snorted a laugh, covering her nose. “I don’t know if that was dorky or sexy.”

  “I’ve been told I’m both,” Nathan said, taking a swig of his drink.

  She looked him up and down. He was hiding a lot of muscle under his sweater and he looked as if he had been personally sculpted by a god. “Yeah. I don’t think anyone’s ever called you dorky. But nice try.”

  “Okay, that’s true,” he said with a shrug. “More like the bad boy of my brothers.”

  “Bad boy?” She raised her eyebrows. That didn’t sound right either.

  “I was the one getting us beer when we were underage,” he said, with a shrug. “My older brother, Conner, he tends to call the shots but I never listened. Then I ran off. Got into some real trouble. It was fun until it wasn’t.”

  “And now you’re a nice handyman,” she said, leaning on her arm to face him.

  The light was low and it glimmered in his eyes and played off his hair, making it look like spun gold. He had such
an easy smile and an open way about him that was so warm she wanted to wrap herself up in it like a blanket.

  “Now I’m a nice handyman.” His voice was low and husky, and when he met her gaze, it somehow didn’t sound as innocent as it should have.

  “Why are you really a handyman?” she whispered.

  “I told you.”

  “No, c’mon,” she smiled, searching his eyes. “There’s more to it.”

  He sighed, and scooted a little closer, leaning on his hand. “I like fixing things. It’s what I’m good at. People get so happy when something was broken and you came along to make it better. That’s what I like to do. “

  “Even if they’re just rich people in a ski lodge?” She said, raising an eyebrow.

  “Yeah,” he said, nodding. “Well...I also fix things for people around the mountain. There are bears who live in cabins farther up. I like to make sure they’re taken care of.”

  “Huh…” She shook her head. “Not sure I’ve ever met anyone like you before. Wish you’d been around when I was younger. My brother and I could have used taking care of.”

  “You two were on your own?”

  She nodded mutely and his hand moved as if to stroke her hair before he pulled it back. Her cheeks warmed, her heartbeat picking up a little at the near gesture, but she only dropped her gaze to her drink and took another sip.

  “We used to move from town to town,” she said softly. “And there’s always a rich part of town. We had no money.” She shook her head, chuckling at the memory of threadbare clothes when they lived as humans and strategic shoplifting. “I mean no money. And I was okay living as a bear most of the time. But sometimes I wanted… I wanted to feel human. And sometimes we’d walk by these big hotels or restaurants and I’d stare at the people in the windows.” She spoke softly staring across the bar into the dark, mirrored glass that reflected them. “They looked so happy. And there were always couples. They seemed so in love. Once at Christmas, I saw people dancing in a hotel ballroom through the windows. All the lights dancing over their happy faces… I wanted that. I don’t know. It made me feel like I was more of an animal when I was human than when I was a bear. Funny, huh?”