“He told me how it happened,” Ryan said. “I saw him last weekend and he explained everything.”
“You saw him? How is he doing?”
“Ask him yourself.”
“I can’t.” I went over and grabbed two beers from the fridge, handing him one. He grinned and popped it open. “He isn’t talking to me.”
“He’s doing okay from what I can tell.” Ryan walked over to sit at the table. “He’s finally out of that damn apartment and away from his mom.”
I took a drink of my beer and sat across from him. “That’s good.”
“Shit, you look miserable.”
“Huh?”
“You really love him, don’t you?” Ryan asked, his gaze intense. “Just the mention of Cas and your whole face changes. It sucks. Before I knew it was him, I was glad you’d found someone. Because you seemed happy, and I hadn’t seen you that way in forever.”
I didn’t know how to respond.
“I’m sorry, Dad.”
“For what?”
Ryan set his bottle down after draining half of it. I could see how difficult it was for him to talk about. “My issues with you being gay have made your life hell, and I’m sorry.” His eyes watered, and he looked away. “Cas was right, as he always is. I was a self-centered asshole who didn’t think about how you felt. I only thought about how it made me look with you being gay, and it was stupid and I’m sorry. Which is why I’m stepping aside now.”
“Stepping aside?”
“Both of you look fucking awful,” Ryan said, waving a hand at me. “Just go talk to him and get back to how you were.”
“Are… are you saying you’re okay with us being together?”
“I’m not okay with it. Like I said, it’s fucking weird. But you have my blessing or whatever. Cason’s had enough people in his life let him down, and you make him happy. And he deserves that—to be happy.” He stood from his chair. “So do you.”
I stood and approached him.
“What are you doing?” he asked before I pulled him in for a hug.
“Thank you,” I said, holding him a moment before releasing him.
“I didn’t do anything, but you’re welcome, I guess.” Ryan tried so hard to look indifferent, but I saw the tears in his eyes. “I can stay for a while if you want. We can watch some stupid crime show on Netflix or something.”
Ryan wasn’t good with emotions. He’d gotten that from me. However, this was his way of saying he wanted me back in his life.
“Sounds good,” I said.
He smiled before stepping away and going back to playing it cool. “Not like I have anything better to do tonight.”
“Want me to order a pizza?”
“Pepperoni,” Ryan said, his face lighting up a little. “Cas is a weirdo and likes plain cheese. Did you know that?”
“I did,” I answered, feeling that ache in my chest again. Then I shrugged it off and grabbed my phone to order the pizza.
Baby steps. Just as Jay had said.
***
Ryan stood on the pitcher’s mound and faced the batter on home plate. The catcher gave a signal, and Ryan shook his head. He gave another, and Ryan gave a quick nod before taking position.
Even though it was only practice, I still got anxious watching Ryan play. He had given me his practice schedule for the fall, saying I could come watch whenever I had time, so I had driven up to Fayetteville that Saturday to watch him and take him out to eat after.
Slowly, we were rebuilding our relationship, and I felt we were closer now than we had been even before he’d walked in on me and Jay the previous year. Everything was out in the open between us. The anger and bitterness was gone.
After practice, he showered and changed before coming out of the locker room. Then we went to a Japanese restaurant to have sushi. Ryan no longer gave me attitude, but he was still… well, Ryan. Which meant there was a hard punch of sarcasm, jokes, and some jabs at me.
“Have you talked to Cas yet?” he asked. “Or are you still too chicken?”
“Don’t talk with your mouth full.”
“Evading the question, I see.” Ryan swallowed the bite and took a drink of water before curving his arms against his torso and flapping them like wings. “Bawk. Bawk.”
“Keep that up and you’re buying lunch.”
Ryan snorted. “Really, though, Dad. Call him. I talked to him yesterday, and he asked about you.”
“He did?”
“Yep. I told him you were shacking up with that blond bastard.”
My stomach dropped. “You better be joking.”
“I am. Man, you should see your face.” Ryan laughed. “I told him you were working on another big case. He seemed happy we were talking again and stuff.”
“I plan on reaching out to him,” I said.
“But?”
“But I don’t want to be a distraction right now. I know how much school means to him.”
“Whatever,” Ryan said, eyeing me. “I guarantee he’d love to hear from you. Just sayin’.”
Truth be told, I was afraid. It had been a month since I’d talked to Cason. What if he didn’t want me anymore? Fuck, what if he was dating someone else? The next time we saw each other, it would be extremely awkward.
After dinner, I dropped Ryan off at his dorm and began the drive back home. I turned on the radio and smiled as I recognized the god-awful song that played. It was one of Cason’s favorites. I glanced over at the passenger’s seat of my Lexus, remembering the way he looked as he sat there. I remembered the wide grin he gave me as he reached over and grabbed my hand.
I tightened that same hand on the steering wheel. It felt cold now.
When I got home, I went to my room and sat on the edge of the bed, still trapped in my memories of Cason. His laugh, his warmth, and the amazing way he made my heart soar with just a look.
Quit being a coward and call him.
Seeing the low battery on my phone, I opened the nightstand drawer to grab my charger and froze. The bottle of lube was tucked inside, still with the crazy face Cason had drawn on the side with a sharpie.
“Hey, Larry Junior,” I said, taking it from the drawer. “Pretty sure I’m insane for talking to an inanimate object, but I’m kind of missing the guy who gave you that goofy face.”
Then an idea struck, and I jumped off the bed to run into the kitchen and open the junk drawer. I rifled through it until I found the duct tape, and then I went back into the bedroom.
Cason had pulled a ridiculous stunt to get me to talk to him at the beginning of our relationship. Only fitting for me to do the same to get him back.
Chapter 25
Cason
“I’m thinking of inviting Faith to the anime con in Northwest Arkansas next month,” Vincent said as we sat in our dorm. “Do you think she’d be into that?”
“You really have to ask? I can hear her freaking out about it now. Just prepare yourself for the epic fangirling, and I’m sure she’ll want to cosplay.”
A shy smile crossed his face, and he looked back at his World History textbook.
I had only known Vincent for two weeks, but he’d already become a good friend. To both me and Faith. The three of us ate dinner together in the dining hall each night and hung out after classes. Sometimes Faith came to our room, and other times we met her at a coffee shop to do homework and catch up.
“You wouldn’t be, like, mad or anything if I liked her, right?” Vincent asked.
I smiled at his question. Faith had a huge crush on him and would flip shit when she learned he felt the same. “Not at all. Go for it.”
“Awesome. My cousin’s gay by the way,” he added. “I could set you guys up sometime. You’re totally his type.”
“Thanks, but I’m not really ready to date right now. Still getting over someone.”
Though it’d been nerve-racking, I had told Vincent I was gay a few days after moving into the dorm. His response had just been Cool. I knew not everyone would be
so cool about it, but it’d made me feel amazing. Relieved.
Whether I was with Emery or not, I’d never go back to hiding who I was. He’d shown me there wasn’t any shame in it, and without him, I wasn’t sure I would’ve ever had the courage to be out and proud.
I closed my Intro to Law textbook and scooted back from my desk. “I can’t read any more tonight. My eyes are crossing.”
“I’m sure there’s a party we could crash,” Vincent said, closing his book too. “Or we can see if Faith wants to hang out.”
“How about you see if she wants to hang?” I flopped on my bed and stared at the ceiling. “Then you can ask her about the con.”
He grabbed his phone and typed out a message, receiving an almost instant response that made him beam with a smile.
My phone lit up too, and I glanced at it with little interest. It was probably a Facebook notification or something else stupid. I jolted and nearly dropped the damn thing on my face when I saw the text from Emery.
Liam: Larry Junior has been captured. If you aren’t at the below address by eleven tonight, he will be disposed of.
Attached was a photo of the lube with duct tape around it.
I lost it. Completely lost it. I laughed so hard my stomach hurt, the tears in my eyes both from amusement but also happiness. Because after so many weeks of silence between me and Emery, I felt that things were finally about to get better.
“What’s so funny?” Vincent asked.
“Nothing,” I said, getting off the bed and finding my shoes. “You cool if I head out?”
“Sure. I take it the dude you’re not over yet texted you?”
I grabbed my keys off my desk and smirked at him. “Maybe. Don’t wait up for me.”
Then I left the dorm, practically jogging down the hall, down the stairs, and out to the parking lot toward my car. I hadn’t felt that excited in a while. Honestly, I hadn’t felt much of anything since I’d ended things with Emery. But now all the emotions came flooding back.
Ryan had said I could talk to Emery again, but I’d been too nervous. After pushing him away the time he came to my work and not responding to his previous texts, I hadn’t known if he even wanted me anymore.
But he does.
I got in my car and drove toward his neighborhood, my stomach full of butterflies. I sniffed my pits to make sure I didn’t stink and then breathed into my palm for a breath check. All good. The porch light was on when I pulled into his driveway. I cut the engine and flung open the door before slamming it and jogging toward the steps.
My heart was in my throat, and my legs couldn’t carry me fast enough. When the door opened and I saw Emery, I stumbled a little before throwing my arms around him and burying my face against his neck.
“Fuck, I missed you,” I mumbled against his skin, tears falling from my eyes. He smelled just as I remembered, but he seemed warmer, as if I’d been cold for weeks and just now got some relief.
His arms slipped around my waist, and he tugged me inside the house before kicking the door closed. And then his lips were on mine and he was guiding me to his bedroom. He pulled at my shirt, and I tugged at his. Our teeth clanked, and we ran into the wall as we stripped each other down, creating a trail of clothes in the hall.
Once on the bed, Emery kissed down my chest and reached for the lube on the bedside table.
Going so long without his touch, I was desperate for him. We normally spent a lot of time on foreplay, but I needed him now. I couldn’t wait. By the eager way he settled between my legs and slipped my cock into his mouth, his slick fingers stroking my hole, I knew he felt the same.
“I need you,” I moaned, sliding my hand through his black hair as he sucked me.
His piercing blue eyes flashed to mine, and he added a second finger to my ass, sticking them in and spreading them apart, opening me wider.
I needed to taste him too. When I felt like I was prepared enough, I sat up and grabbed his head to stop him.
He frowned. “What’s wrong?”
Then I flipped him to his back. A smile lifted the corner of his mouth. I got between his legs and took his thick erection in my hand, giving it a nice stroke before slipping the tip into my mouth. I played with his balls as I sucked him, letting the sound of his sexy moans encourage me further.
“Cason,” he panted, his gorgeous chest rising and falling with his quick breaths.
“Say what you want.” I licked around his belly button before kissing up his stomach and to his chest, the dusting of hair tickling my lips.
“I want you to ride me,” he said, gripping my triceps and giving them a gentle squeeze. He’d always loved my athletic build. And I loved him praising it.
I snatched a condom from the drawer and rolled it onto his dick before using a generous amount of lube, making it slick for me. I might’ve appeared confident and a bit cocky as I straddled his hips, but I was moments from busting out in tears. Like a total fucking sap. Because I was with Emery again, and it felt so goddamn perfect.
“Hey, look at me,” Emery said, tilting my chin up as I’d been avoiding his gaze. That’s when I saw his eyes were a little glassy too.
I smiled as my vision blurred. “We’re quite the pair, aren’t we?”
He slid his hand to my nape and brought me down to his lips, kissing me slowly. As we kissed, he positioned his cock at my entrance and pushed inside. I pulled from his mouth with a slight wince and arched my back. He moved his hand down my abdomen as I sat back on him, taking him deeper.
“You okay?” he asked, his voice gruff.
“I’m with you,” I said, not bothering to fight the intense emotion bubbling to the surface. “I’m better than okay.”
The sex wasn’t a fast fuck like I had thought I wanted in the beginning. I rode him slow, staring into his eyes with each roll of my hips. I’d missed the feeling of being so full. So complete.
Emery grabbed the lube and squeezed some into his palm before stroking my cock. I sighed and moved a little faster, his cock going into my ass as his hand pumped me on the upward glide. When I started to shudder, he grinned.
“That’s it,” he purred, stroking me faster as his eyelids got heavy. He was close too.
I came down on him harder, making the bed bang against the wall. I braced my hands on his chest and shifted a little to the right.
“Fuck,” I whimpered as his cock nudged my prostate.
Emery gripped my hips and pumped up into me faster, hitting my sweet spot over and over again. My voice broke as I cried out, my whole body quaking as my orgasm rocked into me.
He joined me not long after, emitting a breathy moan as his hips jerked upward and stilled. When he tilted his head back, exposing his sexy throat, I bent and kissed him there. His arms came around me, and he flipped me to my back.
“I love you,” Emery said, cupping my cheek. “It’s been hell without you.”
I leaned into his touch and stared into his gentle blue eyes. “Love you too.”
“Promise me you won’t leave again.”
“I promise.” I threaded my fingers through his soft hair. “Hate to break it to you, but you’re kinda stuck with me now.”
“I can live with that.”
And then he kissed me, the broken pieces of my heart finally mending.
***
“Fuck you, Cas!” Ryan tossed the controller down. “How do you always win at this game?”
“Because I’m better than you?”
He shoved my shoulder. “Asshole.”
“Jerk.”
Ryan sat on his bed while I sat in his gaming chair next to it. I’d come over that Friday to hang with him since we’d both had busy weeks at school and hadn’t been able to see each other much. My fears after we graduated seemed so far away right then. I hadn’t lost my best friend. The distance between our colleges didn’t keep us apart, and he accepted me completely.
“You meeting my dad tonight?” he asked, popping some Skittles into his mouth.
&nbs
p; It was end of September now. Emery and I had officially been dating—openly—for a month. Talking to Ryan about it was still strange for both of us, but it had gotten better.
“Yeah.”
“Whoa, what’s with the frown?”
“Well, we’re going to dinner,” I said, biting my bottom lip. “With Jay.”
“Damn, you’re finally going to meet the blond bastard.” Ryan shook his head. “Just try not to smash his pretty face in.”
“Why would I do that?”
“Um, because he and my dad used to bang?”
“Ugh,” I groaned. “Kill me now. Please.”
“Why do you have to meet him anyway?” Ryan asked, eating more candy. It definitely wasn’t on his diet for baseball, but he was a known rule breaker.
“I don’t have to meet him,” I corrected. “I want to. Emery said Jay wants to meet me too, so here we are. On the eve of my death.”
Ryan laughed. “So melodramatic.”
“You’d feel the same way if you were about to meet the superhot ex of a girl you were in love with.”
“All you gotta do is remember this,” Ryan said. “My dad chose you. Not him. That has to mean something, right?”
“I guess so.” I played more of the zombie game, running my character around the map and bashing in the brains of the undead. “You dating anyone?”
“Nah,” he answered. “After the whole Lexi thing, I’m happy being single right now.”
“What about…” I tried to remember her name but couldn’t. “Um, the girl from the gym? Y’all were hitting it off last I heard.”
“Turns out she had a boyfriend and I was the side piece. Fucking bullshit.”
“Yeah, total bullshit. You’re not a side piece, Ryan, you’re the whole damn meal.”
He shoved my arm. “If only I was gay. I’d just date you.”
I scrunched up my face. “No, thanks. I’m more into your dad.”
Ryan made a gagging sound and smacked me with a pillow. “Mom called me yesterday. She said to be at her house by four on Sunday.”
Amber hadn’t taken the news of me dating Emery well at first. Like Ryan, she had even been a little pissed. But she had eventually calmed down and accepted it. She’d started inviting me over for Sunday dinner over the past month, and though awkward at times, it felt great to have her back in my life.
His Temptation Page 24