KILLER: An Unfit Hero Novel

by Faiman, Hayley

  All I can think about is Antoni, and I need to get that whole thing out of my head.

  I run.

  Eyes forward, legs pumping, sweat pouring down my body. Almost two hours later, I stop when my watch alerts me to my ten-mile distance that I set for myself.

  Placing my hands on my hips, I lean over slightly and attempt to catch my breath. I realize that I’m in a parking lot. Lifting my head, I look at the building. I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going really, just that I was heading toward town.

  Headlights.

  The name flashes above the small metal building. It’s obviously a barndominium, similar to Wyatt’s home, except I have a feeling this looks much different on the inside. I’ve never been here before, didn’t even know that it existed, though I’m not sure how.

  Smirking, I glance at the time on my phone and know that there is one person who is awake enough to text me back.

  GALLUP HAS A STRIP CLUB?

  FORD: HEADLIGHTS?

  THAT IS CHEESY AS FUCK.

  FORD: IT’S GALLUP. WE HAVE A FUCKING SHIT TON OF DEER. DIDN’T SAY WE WAS SMART.

  EVER BEEN INSIDE?

  FORD: I’M SINGLE. ALL MY FRIENDS ARE MARRIED. GOT NOTHING ELSE TO DO. IT’S BEEN A WHILE. NO SNATCH THOUGH. THEY KEEP THEIR BOTTOMS ON.

  I chuckle at the exchange and at the fact that Ford knows exactly what goes on in that building. I lift my gaze up to the building again, my eyes scanning the parking lot and they stop on something. My entire body locks up.

  TOMORROW NIGHT. MIDNIGHT.

  FORD: MEET YOU THERE.

  Shoving my phone in my pocket, I start to walk toward the car that caught my attention a few moments ago. Stopping at the driver’s side, I glance into the vehicle and I let out a grunt. I know who drives this car, and the teal water bottle in the cup holder confirms my suspicion.

  Seems someone is holding onto a secret.

  I think about slipping inside to see for myself, but I decide that I’ll come by tomorrow with Ford. Granted, I’m not sure that I want him to see what I suspect we’re going to discover behind the doors of Headlights.

  Fucking shit.

  Shaking my head, I turn my AirPods back up and I start my ten-mile jog back home. I’m going to throttle her. Turn her over my knees and spank the absolute fucking shit out of her. She’ll have deserved it too. Every fucking bit of it.

  By the time I make it back home, I’m no calmer than I was while making my discovery. I don’t know if I’ll be able to see her tomorrow, to look her in the eye without demanding an explanation or some kind of answer from her.

  Slamming my front door behind me, I’m too worked up to head to bed, so instead, I make my way into my home gym and decide to spend some time lifting weights in hopes of easing my anger.

  The only good news about this is that I no longer have Antoni and his family on my mind.

  The bad news is that I still can’t fucking sleep.

  Chapter Four

  TULIP

  I can’t decide if I’m relieved or disappointed when my favorite meal arrives by way of one of the waitresses instead of Louis.

  There’s a note attached that claims he’s sorry, but he couldn’t make it. I give the waitress a few extra dollars, knowing that Louis probably already paid a ton to get her out here, especially since Bill’s Burgers doesn’t deliver.

  Taking my turkey salad and fried pickles into the breakroom, I try to eat them, but I’m too upset. It doesn’t taste right and I don’t feel right.

  Something is wrong.

  He made such a big deal about meeting with me, claiming that he had so much to say to me and now he’s ditched me.

  I doubt that he has anything to do today, especially since I remember him telling me once that he doesn’t do anything while he’s here. He doesn’t work, he spends time with his friends, but most of them are working day jobs, like me.

  “You okay?” Mark asks as he sinks down in the chair across from me.

  With a jump, I lift my gaze to his. He’s grinning at me and I have no clue what he finds funny, but I don’t ask either. I like him enough as a co-worker, but we’re not friends and I just get weird vibes from him all of the time.

  “I’m good.” I nod.

  He hums, his eyes roaming over my body before they lift to my face. “Yeah, you are. Hey, if you have tonight off, I’d love to take you out.”

  “What?” I practically screech.

  “Saw you last night. Liked what I saw. Thought since you’re still single that you’d like to go out.”

  Gulping, my eyes widen as I realize what he’s saying to me. He saw me last night.

  He. Saw. Me. Last. Night.

  “Think about it.” He grins as he rises to his feet.

  I don’t have to think about it. Mark is nice and everything, but he’s my boss and he’s a good fifteen years older than me. Plus, he still lives with his mother. Not that there’s anything necessarily wrong with that, but I’ve heard him talk and he’s mentioned rubbing her feet with lotion on more than one occasion, I get a very Norman Bates vibe from that situation.

  The rest of the day, I keep my distance from Mark and practically sprint out of the store as soon as my shift is over. I halfway expect to see Louis standing next to my car like he was the day before, but I’m disappointed to find that there’s nobody waiting for me.

  I spend the next couple of hours cleaning up around my apartment before showering and applying the heavy makeup that I’m required to wear for work. Shimmying my outfit on, I refuse to look in the mirror, like every night. I throw a heavy oversized thick hoodie on and hurry out of the door.

  Once I arrive at the parking lot of my second job, I pull my car into its normal spot. Gripping the steering wheel, I let out a heavy sigh. It’s time. The moment that I dread six nights a week and have been dreading for the past five months.

  I tell myself that it’s only temporary, but as each day passes and I return to work here, I know without a doubt that it’s becoming less and less temporary and more of a permanent part of my life.

  Without this income, I won’t be able to save even a dime. I need a savings, because one day I want to do more with my life. I’m not sure what that more is going to be, but I want to be ready for it when I figure it out.

  Turning the engine off, I open the door and slip from my car. Hurrying across the mixed dirt and gravel parking lot, I smile at the bouncer who is manning the only customer entrance. He doesn’t say anything, never does, he also isn’t much of a bouncer. He’s just kind of there, in case shit really goes down.

  But I’ve been groped, pawed, and bruised by patrons, he hasn’t stepped in once. When I first started, Charlie told me that we have to watch out for one another in this place. The management and bouncer isn’t going to do shit, and she was right.

  So, now it’s me and Charlie helping one another. I’m not much help, but I figure if things get too bad, my heels are just pointy and sharp enough that I could inflict enough damage to stun someone so that we could run away.

  It’s a shitty plan, but it’s all we have.

  “Hey girl,” Charlie calls as soon as I slip into the dressing room.

  “Hey,” I call out distractedly. She doesn’t call me on it immediately, but I can feel her gaze on me. “Spill,” she says a few moments later.

  I’m adjusting my sparkly bra when I turn my head to look over at her. “A guy I used to see is in town, he asked me to lunch today, then he stood me up,” I blurt.

  Her eyes widen and she nods. “And it’s not Joey?”

  She’s right to ask. As many times as I’ve gone back to him, I would ask me too. “It’s not Joey,” I confirm.

  “He’s hot?”

  “Really hot.”

  “Don’t wait for him to make a move then. If you want him, be brave, girl. Go to his place and demand to know what the hell is up.”

  “I’m not sure that would work,” I murmur.

  She shakes her head, the red hair on her w
ig flying around her shoulders. I know it’s a wig, because I’ve seen her wear it only a few times, plus I know that she’s a natural brunette.

  She says that she likes to keep everyone on their toes by wearing wigs, but I think it’s because she wants to keep her identity hidden a bit, I don’t blame her, I should have done the same thing.

  “It will. Men love a woman who is assertive and confident.”

  Without another word, I watch as she walks out of the room and her words ring in my ears. Men love women who are assertive and confident. I’m neither, never have been. I wonder if this is why I attracted Joey the loser and why Louis ditched me?

  My eyes fill with tears and I blink them back, not wishing to ruin my heavy mascara and cheeks with black streaks.

  Shit.

  Maybe I’m the problem.

  LOUIS

  “What’s the real reason you wanted to come here?” Ford asks as he takes a pull from his beer.

  Picking up my glass of water, I take a healthy gulp as my eyes scan the stage and the women working the room. I don’t see her anywhere, yet, but I know that she’ll be here. She made it very clear that she only gets one night off a week, and she’s already had that.

  “Just wanted to come, fucking bored as shit at my house.” I shrug.

  Ford snorts, obviously not believing a word I’ve said and I don’t blame him. I’m a shit liar, always have been. It’s why I usually don’t even attempt it. Plus, lying doesn’t fucking feel good on the soul.

  “You know most of them will do whatever you want for a few extra bucks,” Ford announces. My head whips around, my eyes wide and anger fills my entire body from the inside out. “Who is she?” he demands.

  “You fucking with me?” I growl.

  He chuckles, shrugging a shoulder. “Fuck yeah I am, I needed a real reaction and I got it. Now, tell me why you dragged my ass down here. I don’t mind coming and watching a show, but there’s a reason you’re here and don’t try to deny it.”

  Lifting my hand, I run my palm over my bald head. Inhaling, I close my eyes and know that he’s going to find out soon enough anyway, that is, if he doesn’t already know. Gallup is small and I doubt someone could hide a career as an exotic dancer for long.

  “It’s Tulip,” I grind out.

  There’s a moment of silence between us as the room darkens. Music begins, then the lights begin to brighten only on the stage. I’m not really paying attention, my focus on Ford when he coughs and jerks his chin forward, his eyes not leaving the stage.

  “I see.”

  Turning my attention to the stage has my stomach flipping at the sight in front of me.

  It’s Tulip.

  She’s on stage and dancing. She doesn’t do much on the pole, at first, other than kind of hold onto it and walk around it, but she drops her ass down to the floor, her legs spreading. The only consolation is that she’s got little shorts on.

  Her clothes don’t stay on for long though. She removes her top, exposing those tits that I’ve been dreaming of, to a room full of strangers. Then the little shorts she had on, she shimmies those off.

  I watch in what can only be described as horror mixed with anger and a whole lot of fucking desire, as she rolls around on the floor in nothing more than a scrap of fabric covering her pussy. Everything else on her body is completely exposed.

  When the lights go out and her dance is over, I watch as she collects her money off of the darkened stage before I turn to Ford. “That’ll be the last time you see anything,” I snap.

  He turns to me, his lips turned up in a full-on fucking smile. “Won’t easily forget that little number, Louis.”

  “Erase it from your brain,” I demand as I stand to my feet.

  Ford throws his head back laughing. “Not fucking likely,” he calls out as I stomp away from him and toward the back of the club. Lifting my hand, I flip him off over my shoulder.

  Once I reach what I assume is the dressing room of the club, I am surprised to see that there’s no bouncer here, no security at all. In fact, I haven’t seen anyone walking around that looks like they could be security, aside from the man at the door.

  Frowning, I reach for the doorknob and twist. My suspicions are correct when I see a sea of flesh and glittery sparkles everywhere.

  “Can I fucking help you?” a tall woman wearing a red wig demands, blocking my view of the rest of the room.

  Smirking, I cross my arms over my chest and tilt my head to the side. “Need to talk to Tulip.”

  She narrows her eyes on me and crosses her own arms over her chest before tilting her head to the side. “I don’t think so,” she snorts.

  Biting my bottom lip in an attempt to keep from smiling at her, I shake my head once. She’s cute trying to be tough, but her act doesn’t work. I can tell that she’s scared. Her legs are shaking as are her hands.

  Looking over her shoulder, my eyes search the room for the woman that holds my goddamn heart in the palm of her hand. She doesn’t know how much that one-night means to me, how fucking devastated that I was when she told me that she couldn’t be with someone like me.

  She just doesn’t fucking know what she does to me. What she did to me after only a few hours in her presence, the way she made me feel. Like for the first time I felt whole, that this woman could see me for me, not for my profession. That I was more than a professional boxer. That I was more than a stepping stone to fame.

  “Louis?”

  Her voice is shrill, panicked and downright fucking terrified at the sight of me.

  Dipping my chin, I see her standing shoulder height to the woman in front of me. She’s ditched her too-high heels and is wearing a robe to cover her nudity. Her makeup is too heavy, her hair too goddamn teased and styled.

  “Tulip,” I clip. “Come here.”

  Chapter Five

  TULIP

  The dressing room is so silent that you could hear a bobby pin drop. I’m frozen to my spot, unable to move even an inch as I stare at him over Charlie’s shoulder. He doesn’t even flinch, his gaze is focused on me and nowhere else.

  I hear one of the girls clear her throat behind me and it breaks the staring contest that we have going on. Shaking my head, I take a step back away from him, instead of toward him.

  “I can’t leave. If you want to talk after work, I get off at two,” I whisper.

  To his credit, Louis doesn’t make a move at all. His eyes bore into my soul as we stare at one another. Then, as if something clicks inside of his head, he jerks his chin.

  “I’ll be waiting for you outside,” he announces.

  I watch as he turns his broad back to me and walks away, his arms swinging loosely at his side. I lick my lips as I take in every inch of the back of his body. Slowly, Charlie turns around to face me, her eyes wide and her lips parted in awe.

  “Who. Was. That?”

  Licking my lips, I look over my shoulder at the other six women who are staring at me, wondering the same thing and waiting for my answer.

  Inhaling a shaky breath, I watch as Charlie closes the dressing room door behind her and places her hands on her hips, popping one hip out while she impatiently waits.

  “That was Louis. We had a one-night thing almost a year ago. He’s back in town and he keeps saying he wants to talk. I just—”

  “Just fuckin’ nothin’. That man is fine as shit. You’re going to go back for seconds, right?” one of the girls shouts behind me.

  Looking over my shoulder, I shrug before I focus my gaze back on Charlie.

  “Okay, leave her alone. He was fine as shit. Unlike the men we see around here, but Tulip has her reasons, I’m sure.”

  Charlie thinks I’m stupid for turning him away, for not running into his arms. She doesn’t have to say it, I can feel it in the tone she uses and the way she’s looking at me.

  “You don’t understand,” I whisper.

  She holds up her hand. “And I don’t need to understand shit. This is your life, babe, you do whatever you hav
e to do. It’s none of my business, but he’s hot, so if you wanted to get yourself a little somethin’-somethin’ for old time’s sake, nobody and I mean nobody, would judge you for that.”

  I can’t help myself, I burst out laughing, because I know that she’s not wrong and if they knew just how good Louis was at somethin’-somethin’ they would be telling me to run, not walk, to get a little for old time’s sake—or maybe a lot.

  The rest of the night, I worry about Louis waiting for me, about what he’s going to say to me. I wonder if this changes what he wanted to talk to me about yesterday.

  I worry that he’s going to tell Wyatt, Beaumont or Rylan about what I’ve been doing and if they’re going to tell their women. I have a feeling that they wouldn’t want me hanging around them much longer if they find out.

  When I’m finished for the evening, I throw my oversized hoodie on and slip back into my flip-flops before I head out the side door with my head down. Inhaling a deep breath, I let the warmth of the parking lot wash over me.

  There’s a warm breeze that floats around me, and I exhale as I lift my head to look toward my car. Just like he said he would, Louis is waiting for me, leaning against the driver’s side door, his head turned toward me and his green eyes focused on me and only me.

  Walking toward him, I attempt to square my shoulders. He smirks, which causes my belly to melt at the sight of his full lips turning up so effortlessly. I feel like it takes everything inside of me to produce a smile these days and he just has one at the ready.

  “Follow you home?” he asks as his greeting.

  Looking behind me, I notice that the sad excuse of a bouncer has his back turned to me and he’s talking to one of the girls who is pressed against the wall. Shifting my gaze back to him, I let out a sigh and nod once.