I made my boss favor me over everyone else. When all the other employees got jealous, I got them to love me as well.
Want something done for you? Great, just play up strategic weakness. It agitates other people, and they'll just do it for you. Most people are impatient, and will not tolerate inadequacies. This brings out their superior intellectual side. Unconsciously they'll think "this is my chance to prove I'm better. And, I know what I'm doing." Or, their inner teacher. Which is the same thing.
My manipulative cousin always mentioned that he didn't know how to cook or make tea. So, I would say "okay, fine I will just show you." Me showing him was me doing it for him.
However, don't do this all the time, people will end up resenting you. And, they'll see right through your bullshit. Remember bullshit will get you to the top, but it won't keep you there. It will anger people, that you aren't trying to learn how to do X.
Second reason you play innocent is because everyone likes innocence. They want their youthful days back. People want purity again. The world has corrupted their eyes through heartbreaking experiences, people have betrayed their trust, and they have witnessed the dark side of things.
What to do:
Be child like. Be lighthearted. See through eyes of a child, once in a while. Have a fresh new outlook on life. Seem a little vulnerable, or like you don't have much experience. Be pure.
What not to do:
Playing the role of childlike innocence, requires a certain degree of childlike mischief. Playing completely innocent results in being treated like a child. Innocent could mean lack of intelligence, experience or both. Do not do this. Show some of your intelligence, and experience.
When to use this:
-When you want to have fun.
-To lighten a dark situation. For example, when you want to convince someone who is uptight, and negative to go on an adventure.
-When you want to learn about people.
Learning about people requires no biases, opinions and a fresh outlook on life, and people. Hence why you must have a fresh outlook when getting to know people.
Especially, your target. This'll draw your target to you more as well due to the fact that you aren't bringing any baggage in.
When not to use this:
-When you want to be taken seriously.
-When people want to be taken seriously.
-In a life or death situation. If you're stranded you want to show you're serious, and you care.
Who this works on:
Busy rich people:
Who want an escape, from their responsibilities. And, who want to go back to their younger days where they didn't have responsibilities weighing them down.
Troubled people:
They wish they had their innocence back. And, weren't troubled by life.
People who have a superior inferior complex:
An innocent person would make them feel superior. An innocent person wouldn't threaten their ego.
Older people:
Wish they had their younger days back.
Nerds:
Because they could essentially "teach" an innocent person things.
Who this doesn't work on:
Someone else who is innocent.
be in the present moment
Turns out time machines do exist. They exist in our minds. People are either constantly living in the past or the future. But, never the present. So when you live in the present it is seductive.
Why? Because no one usually is. The ability to actually be and bask in the present moment is powerful. You pay more attention. You're calmer. It shows you care about nothing more than the time you have with this person RIGHT NOW. It makes you appreciate your time, and utilize it the fullest.
How to take advantage of this:
Be mindful of the moment. Experience everything through your five senses. Get out of your head, and into your body. This means you aren't thinking about what happened two minutes ago or what you'll have for dinner. Truthfully none of that matters at the moment. You'll handle all of that that when you need to. You're experiencing the moment fully. Through all five senses. Nothing else matters except this moment. And, it'll rub off onto other people too. Just breathe in and out. And, it'll help bring you into the moment.
When to use it:
All the time. Even when you're doing the dishes. When you're taking a number two. Experience everything. Did you know that ninety percent of your thoughts are just useless and repetitive? Why indulge in useless, repetitive thoughts?
Who to use it on:
Everyone! Including when you need to spend time with yourself.
When not to use it:
You can use it all the time. There isn't a time when you should be distracted from the present.
become the flawless illusion
"Looking back, I guess I used to play-act all the time. For one thing, it meant I could live in a more interesting world than the one around me."
-Marilyn Monroe
Explanation:
Reality just fucking sucks, sometimes. Everyone wants some kind of illusion. Everyone wants to step into a different world. People who are "realistic" are often seen as cynical, and/or pessimistic. Why? Because they're realistic. No one likes realistic people, and if they say they do, they don't. But, we don't admire them as much, as the person who is a mixture of dreamy sweet, and reality.
You've got to be unrealistic and bring them into some kind of fantasy. Represent a dream. Be unrealistic, without being obvious. The elements of being dreamy are:
Make it seem like you can do anything. Like there are no limits. Think of movies, there are no limits. They can do anything. They are almost god like, the actors and actresses. They romanticize everything. You are so close to the person but, they're behind the screen. Being dreamy means you represent the bigger things in life, like life and death. You're fetishized. Be passionate. You're extra ordinary. Be mysterious. Act like you're somewhere else, have a day dreamy look on your face.
Appear immortal. We have always believed celebrities are gods. To us, they'll never die. And, even when they do die, we deny it. Because it is ingrained into our brains that these celebrities are immortal. Learn from these celebrities, and become a fantasy, and immortal.
Who this works on:
-Busy people who have lots of responsibilities. Reality is all they DON'T need right now. What they truly need is, some kind of illusion, a fantasy.
-The dreamer is someone who is constantly fantasizing and/or daydreaming.
-The intellectual. This would work well on the intellectual, because they need an escape from their mental prisons. Giving them fantasy and reality will give them the chance to escape their mental prisons.
Who this doesn't work on:
People who have messy lives. They want to come back into reality. These types of people are cynical.
However, some people who have messy lives tend to be escapists. You'll be able to tell they're this way by things they talk about. Are they always listening to music, watching tv? Reading (fiction) these are all signs that they are escapists. So this technique shall work for them.
The elements of being realistic:
Realistic means people can relate to you. You're in the clouds, yet, you're still grounded and everyone can relate to you. And, understanding daily limitations of life, and how life works.
So, you'll also have to understand timing. When is the right time to be dreamy, and when is the right time to be realistic.
When to be dreamy:
-When you want things to be light.
-When people question your character.
-When you're having fun.
-When you want to trigger desire.
-When you want to inspire people.
-When you want to provoke curiosity, and their imagination.
When to be realistic:
-When someone is telling you something personal, and/or serious.
-You want to be able to be relatable.
&n
bsp; -When things get serious.
-When someone is having a problem.
The right timing of the real and unreal will draw people to you. The way celebrities and highly fantasized people have an effect on the world, you'll be able to have that same effect, by having a mixture of fantasy, and reality.
the small details
What do you think impresses your target? A dinner at an expensive restaurant? Flowers? Expensive gifts? Corny words, and phrases?
Why are you trying so hard? Do you know how suspicious you look? How many times has your target heard and received these "impressive" gestures?
What to do:
Show them you're paying attention to them. Do little things that appeal to their psychology. Say things that acknowledge their fears, insecurities, and deepest desires. Remember, it's the little things in life that make up the large-scale things.
Some examples:
If their long work hours, prevent them from going on adventures, the last thing they want to do is go to dinner. It's likely something they do on a daily basis. Do something that appeals to their individual desires. Take your hard working target, on a spontaneous adventure. Maybe they're craving some kind of uncertainty, because they're stuck in a routine.
An attractive woman may want someone to notice her intelligence. Make her feel she is intelligent. Ask her questions, that would bring out the intellect in her. Compliment her intelligence.
go beyond our physical existence
Why are cult leaders attractive? Why did people follow Charles Manson, even knowing he was a sinister prick?
Explain:
They are spiritual. They believe in something much more divine. See, most of us are seeking for some kind of meaning in our lives. We're searching for something more than this material world. Another realm. A spiritual one.
Why does this work?
Our minds seek to make sense of our EXISTENCE. We all worry deep down inside that this life is meaningless. It is our existential insecurity. We want to believe there is something more. After all, what would be the point if it just ended? We don't want it to just end. This scares us. And, religion, spirituality, the belief of spirits, ghosts etc. ease our fears. It gives us some kind of blind faith, that life may be meaningful. That, it does not stop there.
What to do:
Show unhappiness of the physical plane. You cannot be bothered by money, status, and other physical ordinary things, and routines. Make it seem like it was fate. There was a reason why this is happening.(Your meeting) It was destiny, that brought you and your target together. While showing that love, sexuality and romance are all spiritual.
What not to do:
I always have people coming to my door, trying to stuff the whole "Jehovah's witness" religion down my throat. Now, I respect people of Jehovah's witnesses, but this is a prime example of what you SHOULDN'T do. Your spirituality shouldn't be specific, unless you have a religion you follow. But, usually it should be ambiguous. And, generalized.
Who not to:
If someone is cynical. Then tone it down slightly. Be very ambiguous about your spirituality. Don't directly mention "destiny or fate" but, use different, indirect words, or phrases.
Example:
"It was meant to be."
Who to use this on:
Someone who is evidently bored with the physical mundane things as well.
The existentialist:
If the existentialist you are targeting, has existential insecurity, you can soothe their fears by implementing this technique.
The narcissist:
Take the narcissist out of their selves, by bringing them into a much more spiritual view of the world.
Rich person:
The rich person has experienced many things the world has to offer. Rich people often grow bored, because of all the experience they have. There are two ways to refresh them: either by playing innocent, or being spiritual.
Example:
Mansion:
When we first started speaking, he started talking about how he wasn't "destined for something because of his current incarnation." I knew what he was talking about. He always spoke in a way that was spiritual. Like his riches were meant to happen, because the angels let it. Simultaneously it horrified me, and turned me on. He was the ideal example of the "spiritual romantic, and sexual."
play against your stereotype
Everyone will always have expectations of you based on your stereotype.
Stereotypes such as: hair color, age, race, career choice, Followed by subcultures. Such as hippie, thug.
For me, I'm tall, slim yet curvy. I'm beautiful. I also look like a teenager for my age. So I'm either intimidating or brainless. Many people believe I'm shortsighted. A huge bitchy airhead. Except, I'm not. I surprise people with my intellect, and masculinity.
This'll keep people on their feet, and you won't be a boring person.
Surprise your targets, by giving yourself qualities and dimensions that go against your stereotype(s).
Examples:
Maybe you're tough, but you love to read romance novels.
A sociopathic person volunteers for a charity.
A pothead who practices martial arts.
By combining characteristics in unexpected ways, you appear mysterious, memorable, and unique. It'll make people want to know you more.
This makes everything in the process more fresh, unpredictable, and exciting.
leave your baggage at the door
Have you ever gone out for coffee, or dinner with someone who continuously spoke about their baggage?
You sit there trying to be sympathetic, and try to sneak in a few words, but they continue ranting? Don't they ever stop to get some air? At this point, you just want to leave.
Why do we hold onto baggage?
Baggage is easier to hold onto, rather than letting go of it. Our minds hold onto our baggage as a form of protection. To you, it might be your norm. Your mind is always presenting past memories, hurts, and pains. And, you sit there going over every detail. However, when you hear someone else verbalizing their baggage, you want to cringe. It's alright if it comes up, but all the time, is excessive.
When meeting with people, we want a blank fresh canvas. Not one that is messy, and filled. Leaving your baggage at the door allows people to project their ideals onto you. We are more likely to project onto people who are quiet, and unbiased, hence leaving your baggage at the door.
How baggage can negatively affect your current relationships:
1) You project your past onto other people.
2) You can't control the past. Only the present. The past doesn't exist anymore, so focus on what does exist right now: the present.
3) You're not truly healing your past wounds. You continue to keep burying it deeper, and deeper. You need to fix the emotional wounds so it won't affect the future and present anymore.
How to take advantage of this:
If they ask you about an ex, or something personal, you'll have to give little bits of pieces and information. Not the whole story. If it was a question that may trigger certain emotions, and you answer vaguely, with indifference it shows it doesn't have an effect on you. Hence, not bringing any baggage in. I say indifference because the tone of your voice exposes how an experience had an effect on you. If you have a sad tone, it has left grief with you. If you were indifferent, it shows it had zero effect on you. Hell, you even forgot about it!
Come into a situation with a pure curiosity. If you bring in your baggage you place it onto someone else, and it prevents you from truly learning about the other person. Leave all your biases, negative emotions, opinions, memories at the door.
If someone tells you their opinion about something, acknowledge it. Don't argue with them about how it's "wrong." People will want to open up to you more, because you aren't projecting onto them. You're simply listening. (Light commentary is acceptable.) People crave someone who is a good listener. A real listener. Be a good listener, be i
n the present moment.
When you can show off your "baggage"
If you need to vent, then vent. If you can trust this person, emotionally. However, you want people to know very little about you, but enough to keep rapport.
However, if someone keeps pushing you to talk about your past, don't get defensive and say "LOOK MAN I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT."
Instead, reply with “It's whatever. Or, "its a long boring story." It’ll give you that sexy nonchalant tone. Like, everything and everyone else is insignificant.
What not to do.
DO NOT talk about your past. Meaning bad memories, and talk about your ex's, or the people who have wronged you.
Don't play victim.
Works with:
Everyone.
No one, I repeat, no one wants to hear about your baggage.
romanticize everything
Romanticizing things, ideas, situations, or people is the act of conveying something as more glamorous, ideal, or better than it truly is. (Think: Hollywood. They will find anything to romanticize.)
Make things seem much more romantic than they are. Idealize things and situations, in a very subtle way.
How To Make Someone Fall In Love With You, Forever; How to Make Someone Obsessed With You Page 9