Secret Remorse

by T N Lowe

  “So nice I didn’t want to come home.”

  “Aren’t they always,” Kegan says standing. “I would sit in on the meeting, but it looks like there won’t be one. Call if you need anything.”

  Kegan leaves, and I write a quick algorithm to generate the six-digit code needed to enter the secret garden. Working out a couple of glitches I get the code generater working. Then log into a secure VPN network and send the codes via Anon Email to ensure there is no Kinsman connection. I’m a quarter of the way through the first list when Sarah comes in with a large red vase full of white orchids. “These came for you, Shauna.”

  “Thank you, Sarah,” I say as she places the vase on my desk and leaves.

  Plucking the card from its holder, I tear open the envelope and read the message, Miss you zhizn moya. Can’t wait to see you next week. Maks. Pulling my phone from my bag, I text Maks.

  Me: The flowers are beautiful, thank you. Miss you too.

  Maks: They are not nearly as gorgeous as you are.

  Me: I hate we have to wait to see each other.

  Maks: Me too. But I’ll make it worth your while.

  Me: Promise?

  Maks: Promise.

  At noon Caitlann calls, and before I can say hi she asks, “Want to have lunch?”

  “Sure, the deli across the street?”

  “Yes, I’ll meet you there in ten minutes. Order me the club please.”

  “Okay, love you.”

  “Love you too,” Caitlann says ending the call.

  ***

  I arrive at the deli first, place our orders and find a table. Caitlann joins me fifteen minutes later as the server is bringing our lunch, “You’re late.”

  “I know sorry. Chase stopped me as I was leaving my office.”

  I roll my eyes, “Can’t he wait till he gets you home?”

  Caitlann snorts as she pulls the skewers from her sandwich. “This time it was work-related, but he tried.”

  I shake my head in disgust at my sister and her husband, “One of these days Patrick will discover what you two are doing on the clock.”

  “Like he would care; he and Lena are doing the same thing.”

  “Wait till he walks in on you. He might care then,” I say taking a bite of my turkey and rye sandwich.

  Caitlann takes a bite of her sandwich then says, “After you have three kids you can judge my sex life. Now to the reason I called, how your trip with Maks went.”

  Starring down at my plate I mumble, “I think I’m falling in love with him.”

  “You what?” Caitlann asks dropping her sandwich.

  “You heard me; I’m falling in love with Maks.”

  “Wow, when are you seeing him again?”

  “Two weeks. I’m Maks’s date for his sister’s wedding. He’s in Turkey this week for work, but he sent me flowers saying he misses me.”

  “Sounds like he has it bad for you too.”

  “I agree.”

  “It won’t surprise me if Maks asks to marry you before the end of the year.”

  “It’s September, Caitlann. We’ve known each other for a few weeks.”

  “It happens sometimes. Chase and I knew each other for six months before we were married.”

  “Whatever eat your lunch,” I scold her.

  ***

  Returning to the office after lunch, I find a small package sitting on my desk with pchelka scribed in block letters on the card. Opening the box, I find a thin gold chain with a blown glass blue eye pendant. Pulling the necklace from the box, I see the note Maks sent with it.

  zhizn moya,

  This is an evil eye. It will help keep the evil away until I can be by your side again.

  -Maks-

  The smile on my face must be the biggest of my life because my cheeks hurt. I slip into the ladies’ room to take a photo of me wearing the necklace, then text it to Maks him with a heart emojis.

  Maks: You’re welcome. Glad you like it.

  While sending the codes I created for Gnome Treasure Hunt, I get a text from Patrick of Lena holding a beautiful baby boy.

  Patrick: Meet your new cousin, Andrew Samuels Love. 6lbs 8oz.

  Me: Congratulations he’s beautiful. Give Lena my love.

  Patrick: Thank you. Will do.

  ***

  As soon as I walk in the door of my townhome Mom calls me. “Hi, Mom.”

  “I talked to Caitlann this afternoon, she told me you met for lunch.”

  “Yeah.”

  “Yes. Why didn’t you call me?”

  “Because you would get ahead of yourself and plan a wedding that isn’t happening yet.”

  “Shauna, you know these things take time to plan. And not only do we have to follow Irish tradition we will have to follow Russian ones too.”

  “Let me guess; you’ve already been researching those traditions?”

  “I have.”

  “Why don’t we wait till Maks proposes before we plan anything?”

  “Why he’s already talked to Patrick and your father. It’s a matter of time before he asks.”

  “What do you mean he’s already talked to Patrick and Dad?”

  “Yesterday after he put you on the plane home he called Patrick and Dad to plan for the wedding.”

  “Was anyone going to tell me about this upcoming wedding?”

  “You know these things take time. Patrick and Dad will have to work with Maks and his father before he can propose. My guess is by Christmas you will have a ring on your finger. How do you feel about an early spring wedding?”

  I shake my head, “I still want to wait Mom. A lot can happen between now and Christmas.”

  “Fine,” she huffs. “But you need to pick a theme, date, and location. We will have to work quickly.”

  “Okay, Mom. How did you do it? Deal with Dad’s ship time and deployments?”

  Mom takes a deep breath. “It wasn’t easy. We talked as often as we could, and we were honest with each other. Then you make the best of the time you have with each other.”

  “Thank you, Mom. I love you.”

  “Anytime baby girl. Love you too.”

  ***

  Friday evening I’m driving to Lena and Patrick’s to visit my new cousin. Arriving at their estate I buzz the gate, Irene answers the call, “Love estate.”

  “Hi, Irene. It’s Shauna. I’m here to visit Lena and Andrew.”

  “Yes, Miss Daly I’ll open the gate.”

  “Thank you,” I reply as the gate opens.

  Pulling the gift bag from the passenger seat, I make my way to the front door Patrick standing in the doorway waiting for me. “Hey, baby cousin what brings you by?”

  “I came to see my baby cousin,” I retort.

  Patrick chuckles giving me a quick hug then leads me to the living room where Lena is sitting with Andrew in the bassinet next to her. Looking up at me Lena smiles, “I didn’t know you were coming.”

  “I wanted to check on you and meet my new cousin,” I said leaning down to hug Lean and peek into the bassinet seeing a sleeping Andrew. “He’s beautiful and look at all his hair.”

  Lena giggles, “I know,” Lena says running her fingers through his hair.

  “I got this for Andrew,” I say handing Lena the gift bag.

  Opening it, she holds up a baby Hawks jersey with Manus’s number on the back. “Awe, thank you.”

  “You’re welcome. Manus wanted to make sure we are his favorite cousins.”

  Andrew must know we are talking about him because his little eyes pop open and he makes a little sob of distress. Lena picks him up and kisses his cheek calming him instantly. Andrew looks at me, and I see he has Patrick’s golden brown eyes with Lena noise. “Do you want to hold him?” Lena asks.

  “Yes please,” I say taking him. I hold and kiss his little cheeks until he fusses. With one last kiss, I hand him back to Lena. “I’ll give you some alone time; I wanted to meet the new addition and say congratulations.”

  “Thank you,”
Lena says taking Andrew.

  “I’ll walk you out,” Patrick says. “Thank you for coming; it means a lot to Lena.”

  “Lena is my friend and family, Patrick. I wanted to come.”

  “I know, and it means a lot to both of us.”

  “I know,” I say with a smirk.

  “Drive save baby cousin,” Patrick says with a laugh.

  Chapter Ten

  It has been the longest two weeks of my life, and I’m on pins and needles to see Maks tonight. The eight-hour time difference made it difficult for us to talk, but we managed to text every day. By one in the afternoon I’m not only driving myself insane, but I’m driving everyone around me crazy. Kegan finally had enough while we’re sitting in a meeting with Patrick reviewing last-minute changes to the app before the public launch. “Shauna, go home. You’re driving Patrick and me crazy.”

  “But-” I try to protest.

  “No, he’s right,” Patrick agrees.

  “What about-”

  “I will leave you notes on what we decide. Go home and get ready before you force me to lock you in your office,” Kegan tells me.

  “I’ll go, but call me if you have questions,” I instruct them before leaving the room.

  Rushing home I eat leftover pasta before showering slowly trying to wash my nerves away. Once my hair is clean, body washed and I shave my legs I feel more relaxed. Wrapping myself in a fluffy green towel, I move to my closet to find the perfect dress to wear. Sifting through my options, I find a lilac sweater dress with three-quarter sleeves and flares at the waist. Stepping into my dress and pulling up the zipper then sit at my vanity for hair and makeup.

  Done with my hair and makeup, I pull on my wool trench coat before picking up my weekend bag and walking outside to the waiting cab. “Where to?” The cabbie asks in a deep voice with a heavy accent.

  “Dulles airport departures, please.”

  “Yes, ma’am,” he replies pulling away from my house and into D.C. rush hour traffic.

  At a quarter to six the cab drops me off; I rush through the door and make my way through security before rushing to the gate and boarding the plane to Philadelphia.

  An hour later I land in Philadelphia, the people in front of me don't move fast enough and are keeping me from my man. Another ten minutes pass before the couple with a baby finally pulls their carry on down from the overhead compartment. Pulling my bag from the compartment, I hurry off the plane through the terminal to the arrival area.

  Five minutes later I see Maks wearing a camel color Henley shirt with dark jeans. Jogging towards him I drop my bag and jump into his arms raining kisses on his face. “Miss me, pchelka?”

  “More than I knew was possible.”

  “Me too,” Maks answers deepening our kiss. The security guard next to us clears his throat reminding us we’re making a scene. Maks sets me on my feet then picks up my bag from the floor. Taking my hand we make our way around the crowd of people in baggage and into the Range Rover.

  “Hi Oleg,” I say sliding into the back seat.

  “Hi Miss Daly,” Oleg replies pulling away from the airport.

  Tucking myself into Maks’ side, I ask, “Where are you taking me?”

  “My parents’ house,” Maks growls. “I want nothing more than to spend the night alone in our bed, but we have dinner with family first.”

  “If we must,” I pout.

  Maks kisses me whispering, “We will make it short, I promise.”

  Oleg moves us through the busy city of Philadelphia and into the suburbs where Gennadi and Alla live. Unlike the last time I was here the driveway is full of cars, valet service is parking cars in a small clearing south of the house. “You said this was a family dinner,” I say awed at the line of cars.

  “The Vory and the elders are here to celebrate Rozalina and Ioann’s wedding.”

  “Wow, if this is the night before what will tomorrow be like?”

  “A madhouse,” Maks merely answers.

  “Thanks for the warning,” I deadpan.

  “Don’t worry I will protect you,” Maks says leaning in, kissing me one last time before the valets open my door and helps me from the Range Rover. Maks rounds the vehicle taking my arm and leading me into his parents’ home. Discarding our shoes at the door before Gennadi, Alla, Rozalina, and Ioann greet us.

  “You made it,” Rozalina squeaks throwing her arms around Maks then me.

  “We wouldn’t miss it for the world,” Maks answers hugging his mother and shaking his father and Ioann’s hands.

  “Go say hello to everyone,” Gennadi says taking our coats.

  Maks wraps his arm around my waist pulling me into his side as we walk into the ballroom where everyone is gathering. Nibbling on my earlobe Maks whispers, “Why don’t we find a place where we can be alone?”

  “Maks,” I admonish him as he runs his hand under my dress. Pulling his hand from my dress, “Maks we are in your parents’ home surrounded by your friends, please mind your manners.”

  “Two weeks, Shauna. I have not seen, touched, or kissed in two weeks,” Maks whines.

  “I promise you will survive and I will make it worth your while at home.”

  “Fine, but we are leaving as soon as dinner is over,” Maks huffs. Taking my hand and escorting me around the room Maks introduces me to the Vory elders. They are The Family equivalent of Patrick and Samuel.

  While Maks speaks to the Vory elders, Gennadi enters the room calling everyone to order. “Good evening everyone and thank you for joining my family in celebrating the marriage of our daughter Rozalina to Ioann Orlov. Dinner is ready if everyone will take their seats.”

  Taking our assigned seats Maks places his hand on my thigh and begins to slowly slide it up. “Maks,” I hiss pushing his hand from my thigh.

  “You’re killing me,” Maks whisper. “We are leaving in an hour if I have to drag you from here.”

  Dinner is a lengthy affair much to Maks disappointment. Two hours later Maks is helping into my coat and dragging me from the house and into the back of the Range Rover. As soon as the door closes, Oleg takes off, and Maks pulls me into his lap. “I can’t wait,” he says before pressing his lips to mine.

  As soon as the door closes us, Maks drops my bags in the entryway, picks me up and pins me against the wall. Wrapping my legs around his waist Maks carries me upstairs to our bedroom. Kicking the door closed Maks sets me on my feet and frees me from my coat. “Krasotka zhizn moya.”

  “What does it mean?”

  “It means gorgeous my life,” Maks answers wrapping his arms around my waist and pulling me tight.

  “Does that mean?”

  Maks nods, “I love you, Shauna. As soon as you left Sunday, I was on the phone to Patrick and your father. I begged them to let me marry you.”

  “Maks,” I gasp.

  “You don’t have to say anything, just know you’re mine.”

  I cup his cheek, “Maks, I love you too.”

  Maks slams his lips to mine, “Pchelka,” he says breaking the kiss and strips me of my dress. “Wow,” Maks admires me standing in my knee-high black boots and tiny black thong. “You are trying to kill me.”

  I giggle at his reaction to seeing me in my boots and undies.

  “Oh, you think it’s funny?” Maks asks as he strips his clothes off, then sets me on the bed and lays his body over mine. “I love you zhizn moya,” Maks says as he presses into me.

  “I love you too, Maks.”

  ***

  The next morning I’m on cloud nine as Maks drives me to the spa where I am meeting his sisters, Ioann sisters, and Alla. As Maks drives us across the city, I play with my fingers nervous to be alone with his family for so long. What if they don’t like me or think I’m not good enough for him?

  “Stop it,” Maks says taking my hand. “They will love you.”

  “How-,” I ask.

  “Because I love you,” Maks merely states.

  I’m not sold. They may treat me well whil
e he’s around, but when we are alone, things could be different. Brianna was not kind to Hui when she and Liam began dating. Half the time she wouldn’t speak to Hui if Liam wasn’t around, they are good now, but it took years for them to get where they are now. I felt bad for Hui and would always help her feel welcome. In the back of my mind, I hear my mother tell me to smile and be polite. They can’t dislike you if you are friendly and polite.

  Still nervous as we arrive at La Beauté Day Spa Maks parks and walks me inside delivering me to Alla. Kissing me chastely Maks whispers, “You will ride in the limo with the ladies to the church where I’ll meet you. Have fun and if you have any problems, call me.”

  Alla pulls me into a side hug, “Do not worry, we will have a great time. Now go meet your father.”

  Maks kisses me one last time before leaving me with his mother and sisters. “Thank you for inviting me,” I express to Rozalina.

  Rozalina smiles, “It was my pleasure, and I want to get to know the woman who stole my brother’s heart.”

  I look at the floor bashfully, “Thank you.” I say as Ioann’s sisters, Vera, and Zoya, join us.

  A woman dressed in a black shirt and pants with La Beauté Day Spa scrawled across her chest enters the lobby, “Oh good everyone is here. If you ladies follow me, we will get started.” Following her into a changing room, we undress and pull on fluffy robes and slippers. We spend the next seven hours being pampered with massages, facials, hot stone manicure and pedicure, and sauna. While being pampered with chocolates and champagne, Rozalina gushes over her almost husband. After a quick shower to wash the massage oil off, we are taken to have hair and makeup done. Once everyone has been styled and powered, we return to the changing room to dress for the wedding.

  In the limo, Alla informs me I am Rozalina keeper until Ioann pays the ransom. “Keeper? Ransom?” I ask

  “One of our traditions; we kidnap Rozalina before the ceremony starts. Ioann must either complete a set of tasks or pay the ransom. You will be the one to sit with Rozalina to make sure he doesn’t steal her away,” Alla explains.

  “Okay,” I answer with a giggle.

  At the church, Rozalina and I are escorted to the bridal suite while everyone else sets up the tasks for Ioann to do. “Thank for sitting with me,” Rozalina says.