A SEAL's Struggle

by Cora Seton

  The men and women of Base Camp arranged themselves in the first few rows. Behind them sat other people from Chance Creek they’d gotten to know over the past year.

  Angus kept his hands by his sides, his fingers unclenched, although he wished he could lash out at something. Greg was marrying the woman he loved. That was proof things could turn out all right, wasn’t it? Maybe he, too, would heal in time and be able to love someone new. Maybe this Leslie woman would turn out to be someone special.

  He wasn’t going to love her, though. He already knew that.

  The music changed. Angus nudged Greg. “Last chance to make a run for it,” he joked, but he knew Greg didn’t want to run. Angus was the one who wanted to bolt down the aisle and out the door.

  Avery appeared in a deep blue gown, her hair piled on top of her head with tiny white flowers tucked into it. Eve Olsen followed in a matching outfit. Angus forced himself to hold still, and when Renata stepped into the room, he softened a little. No matter what his sorrows were, the world still held love and happiness, and he should honor that.

  Would honor that, despite what was in his heart tonight.

  The women made their way down the aisle. Martin Fulsom, the billionaire funding Base Camp, walked alongside Renata. He gave her away with a quick nod to Greg.

  Greg took Renata’s hand, and they turned to face the reverend.

  “Dearly Beloved,” Halpern began, “we are gathered here today…”

  “Thanks for the ride—and the dress,” Win told Alice Reed as they stood on the front steps of the manor. Despite the cool night air and the imposing building’s closed windows, strains of music were audible from inside. Greg and Renata’s wedding reception was in full swing. Win was sorry to have missed the ceremony, but she hadn’t wanted to disrupt it. She’d planned to wait until the reception was over to return to Base Camp, but Alice, who’d put her up late last night when Win appeared without notice at Two Willows, had urged her to jump right into the fray and had driven home after the ceremony to pick up Win and take her to the reception. “This way everyone will learn at the same time that you’re back,” she said.

  “Of course,” Alice said now. “You look wonderful in that gown. Angus will be so pleased to see you’re back.”

  Win wished she was as sure about that as Alice sounded. Now that she was here, she’d begun to imagine all the things that could go wrong. Angus must be angry with her—

  “Come on. Let’s get this over with.” Alice opened the door and stepped inside, tugging Win along with her into the manor’s front hall. It was crowded, and more than one person gasped as they noticed who had entered.

  “It’s Win.”

  “Win’s back.”

  Whispers rocketed through the room, and by the time they managed to find a place to store their coats, she was sure people in the ballroom had heard the news.

  “You can do this,” Alice whispered.

  Win squared her shoulders. Time to face the music. For the first time in months she stopped sucking in her stomach and trying to hide her pregnancy. Alice had chosen a gown that called attention to her belly rather than minimized it.

  “You look beautiful,” Alice assured her again. “Come on.” She put an arm around Win’s shoulders and guided her through the onlookers into the ballroom. In one area a band played and couples danced. Tables were spaced around the room. Someone was serving drinks from a bar.

  Win scanned the crowd.

  “There,” Alice said and pointed. Angus was standing with Avery and Walker near the dessert table, a plate of cheesecake in his hands. Win noticed that Walker had his gaze pinned on Avery, but Avery kept her attention carefully elsewhere. Win’s heart went out to her; she’d had her feelings hurt badly recently if the show was anything to go by. Win had told herself every week not to watch Base Camp, but every week she did. She knew enough to feel she could read between the lines, even of the episodes Clem Bailey had directed. Avery’s eyes were hollow. Walker looked like he’d been left out in the cold with the bison herd he and Avery tended. Win hoped they managed to patch things up soon.

  Avery was the first to spot Win. She stiffened and said something to Angus, who turned around.

  A wash of ice-cold fear rushed through Win as he met her gaze. She held her breath. Would he say hello or walk away?

  No secrets, she reminded herself. She turned a little to make it easier to notice her belly. Smoothed a hand over the small curve of it. Looked him in the eye and nodded. Yes, she was pregnant. Yes, the baby was his.

  She would never know who moved first, but a moment later, she was pushing through the crowd, unable to wait a second longer to hear his voice—feel his touch. Cameramen pressed around them, jostling to get footage of their reunion, but she didn’t care.

  “Angus.” Could he hear all she meant to say in that one word?

  “Win?”

  “I’m sorry.” That was all she could manage before tears clogged her throat and blurred her vision.

  It didn’t matter.

  Because Angus pulled her into his arms and kissed her for all he was worth.

  Chapter Five

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  Angus didn’t know when he stopped kissing Win, how they got down to the tiny house he was due to move into in about forty days or how he managed to open the door with his hands still tangled in her hair—and kick it shut in the faces of the crew members who had followed them. They pounded on the door and peered in through the windows. Angus ignored them. He’d open the door when he was damn well ready—which wasn’t going to be anytime soon.

  The next time he could think straight, however, he and Win faced each other across the width of the tiny galley kitchen, both of them breathing hard, his heart racing in his chest.

  “I thought you weren’t coming back,” he managed to say.

  “I know.” Win’s hair was down around her shoulders, her eyes huge. When she’d walked into the ballroom at the manor, his heart had expanded until he thought it would burst out of his chest. He still couldn’t believe she was standing here, looking at him like she wanted to memorize every inch of him—the same he was probably doing to her.

  “What happened?” Was she back for good? Could they possibly be together after everything he’d gone through these past few months? Angus could hardly allow himself to imagine it.

  And—the baby.

  He reached out to put a hand over her belly. They’d made a baby together—

  “I found out I had no idea who my parents are.”

  The Regency gown she wore had a fitted bodice that ended just below her breasts. The gown’s long skirts were gathered there, emphasizing the slight curve of her belly. Win’s face was thin, her eyes shadowed. He wondered if she’d been crying.

  Was she ill?

  “You’ll have to tell me more than that, lass.” He pulled away from her, took a step back and raked his gaze over her, trying to understand how this woman he’d thought he knew so well could have behaved the way she’d done these past months.

  A corner of her mouth quirked. “I missed that. The way you call me lass.” She gathered her thoughts. “I want to tell you everything. I’m just not sure you’ll believe it. I can hardly believe it myself.”

  “Start at the beginning.” He had to know how long she’d known about their child. How long she’d kept it a secret from him. He wanted to step forward, take her in his arms again and keep her there until all the sorrow of the past few months drained away, but he also needed to keep his head. Why had she left if she was having his baby?

  He never would have left her.

  “The day before I went home, I went into town to run an errand.” She stopped. Bit her lip. “I went into town to get a pregnancy test.”

  Angus stilled. She’d known—before she left?

  “I didn’t think it could be true, but I was late, and I figured I might as well… I went to Linda’s Diner, took the test in the ladies’ room. When I saw it was positive, I was so thrilled.”


  Her eyes pleaded with him to understand, but the more he heard, the less he could comprehend. “If you were thrilled, why’d you leave?”

  “I was still in the bathroom when my father called and told me my mother had cancer. That she might be dying and she needed me. You have to understand how I felt when I heard that. My mother—my rock—might die, and she wanted me with her. How could I turn her down?”

  “Didn’t you explain—” he began, but she was already answering.

  “I thought I could go and be with her, then come back and marry you, but my dad told me that wouldn’t work, that my mother’s treatment could take months or more. That’s when I knew what I had to do.”

  “What?” He wanted to stop time. Freeze it right here, before her words built a wall between them he wouldn’t be able to scale. She’d just found out she was pregnant—how could she have thought of anything but to come and tell him?

  “I had to make you think I didn’t love you anymore,” she explained. “Because if you knew how much I did, and that I was pregnant, you’d have wanted to come to California with me.”

  “Would that be so bad?” What was she afraid of? That he’d embarrass her in front of all her rich friends?

  “If you lost Base Camp over it? Yes, that would be bad, Angus!” Win exclaimed.

  Understanding dawned, but it didn’t assuage his anger. “You dumped me to save Base Camp?” That didn’t add up. “Why couldn’t you come back to marry me, even if it was just for a day or two?”

  “Do you think Fulsom would have allowed that? He wouldn’t even allow us women to stay at the manor when you started filming Base Camp. You know as well as I do he would have said no, and then you would have had to choose between me and them. I couldn’t let that happen.”

  One of the crew members pounded on the door again. “Let us in, Angus. I promise, you won’t know we’re here.”

  “They always say that, and I always know they’re there,” Win joked feebly, but Angus noticed her hands were trembling. “Don’t open the door yet, okay? I have to tell you something, but you have to keep it a secret.”

  “Everyone knows about the baby now, if that’s what you mean.” He’d seen the looks, the pointing fingers.

  “Angus, please.”

  Her tone propelled him forward, but he stopped short before taking her hands. He had to hear all of it before he decided what to do next. What she’d said about not wanting to force him to choose between her and Base Camp rang true—to a point. Except what kind of mother would force her daughter to choose between her and the man she wanted to marry?

  As if she could read his thoughts, Win shook her head. “I thought I owed my mom; she’s been there when I desperately needed her, but it turns out I didn’t know her at all.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “My mother—she lied about the cancer, Angus. It was a ploy to get me home and back in the family fold. I was damaging my father’s reelection possibilities by being on the show. His backers—his very wealthy backers—thought my presence on Base Camp sent the wrong message.”

  Her words brought him up short again. “Lied? Your mother lied—” He couldn’t bring himself to finish the sentence. And he’d thought his mother was bad.

  That changed everything—or did it?

  Angus couldn’t get a handle on any of it. Win had learned she was pregnant, had left to help her mother, had lied by omission to keep him at a distance, had been lied to herself by her mother—

  Win swayed, put out a hand to grab the kitchen counter and steady herself. She was pale, he noticed. Trembling as she faced him.

  “My mother is ambitious, like my father, and she’s going to be furious that I chose you over her. I’m afraid she’ll come after Base Camp somehow. If we expose what she’s done on air, her lies, she’ll definitely retaliate—Oh.” Win bent over. “I don’t feel good.”

  The door burst open, spilling several crew members into the tiny house. They quickly took up their positions and began to film.

  “You’d better say everything you two just said to each other over again,” Chris, one of the cameramen, told them sternly.

  Angus knew he had to get Win somewhere she could lie down. He had to protect their baby, no matter what she’d done or what he felt about it. He couldn’t believe that Win had left Base Camp without telling him about their child, but he also couldn’t imagine a mother faking an illness for six months.

  And he loved Win. Despite everything. He wasn’t a man who walked away when things got complicated. They’d sort this out later, when Win had rested.

  Win raised her head and reached for him. “Angus, I promise I’m yours—if you want me. Yours forever.” She wavered. “I love you—”

  And she crumpled to the floor.

  “Win!” Angus lurched to catch her. He scooped her up and turned to the crew. “Call an ambulance!”

  “It’ll be faster in one of the trucks,” Chris said. He flung open the door and held it until Angus had stumbled past him, Win in his arms.

  “Tell Boone and the others,” he called back. He dashed to the parking lot where the community’s trucks were parked, positioned Win in the passenger seat, strapped her in as she began to come to and raced to the driver’s side. He started up the truck, turned it in a tight circle and headed for the road to town.

  “What’s happening?” she asked feebly.

  “Sit tight. You fainted. I’m getting you to the hospital.” Angus cared no longer about Win’s parents or why she’d kept secrets from him. All he knew was she was here now, something was wrong—

  And he’d do anything to make sure she and the baby were safe.

  She’d never fainted before. Not even during her ordeal when she was thirteen.

  Win allowed Angus to carry her into the hospital, even though she knew she was strong enough to walk. It felt so good to be in his arms. Safe.

  Angus was a man she could trust.

  He’d never lied to her like her parents had. He’d never tried to manipulate her, either. He was consummately loyal. A man who knew himself and expected others to shoot as straight as he did.

  She’d let him down.

  When the intake nurse understood her condition, Win was immediately brought back to an examining room. Angus hovered close by, his concern evident in his narrowed gaze tracking all the professionals in the room as if he could read answers in their faces.

  “I’m fine,” she told him. “I really am. I just got dizzy.” If only she could tell him everything else that was in her heart. How ashamed she was for ever leaving him—for falling for her mother’s lies.

  “You’re not fine; you collapsed,” Angus said. “What about the baby? Is the baby okay?” he asked the nearest nurse.

  “We’re working on figuring that out,” she said. “Just calm down.”

  Angus looked like he had something to say to that, but his grip tightened on Win’s hand, and he kept quiet. “Everything’s going to be all right,” he said to her, and her heart squeezed. He still cared, despite the horrible thing she’d done.

  Time ticked by, and after a series of tests and an IV drip, a doctor pronounced both mother and baby fine.

  “She fainted. Something has to be wrong,” Angus argued.

  “She was dehydrated. She hasn’t eaten enough today. She’s just worn out.”

  “We’ll get you some food—and some rest,” a nurse told Win. “You’ll be right as rain tomorrow.”

  “I’ll stay with her tonight,” Angus said firmly.

  The nurse looked like she’d argue, then shut her mouth and nodded. “Let her sleep,” she ordered.

  “Will do.”

  “I’m sorry,” Win said to him again as the nurses and doctor finished bustling around and left the room. “I’m so sorry.”

  “You’re back and you’re safe. That’s all that matters.”

  “You must hate me.”

  Angus shook his head. “I’ve never stopped loving you. I’m not capable of stopping, lass.
You’re my choice. Forever.”

  “Even though I screwed up?” She couldn’t stop the tears that slid down her cheeks. She was so tired. So sorry for everything she’d done.

  “Even though you did what you thought you had to do. Have you really made your choice now?” His gaze searched hers. “You’re back for good? No matter what?”

  “No matter what. I swear.”

  “Then everything else is the past. We’ll move forward together. You and me.”

  “You and me,” she echoed, hardly believing he was saying the words. She’d been so sure he’d turn her away. But now she was home.

  Truly home.

  Together with Angus, for always.

  Everything would be okay.

  Win slept finally, but Angus didn’t. He sat up all night watching her, memorizing the shape of her face again, watching her chest rise and fall with even breaths, trying to imagine what it would be like to hold his own child in his arms.

  In forty days he would marry this woman. Make a life with her.

  No matter what had happened in the past.

  Angus still had questions—lots of them. He’d be lying if he said it didn’t worry him that Win had kept their baby secret, even though he understood, a little, why she’d gone back home when she did. Losing a mother was a big thing at any age.

  He knew firsthand.

  But allowing Vienna to control her like she had? To force her to choose between her and the man she meant to marry?

  That was something else.

  He could have drawn the short straw at any time these past months. He could have married another woman.

  Which probably was Vienna’s plan all along. He had to hand it to Win’s mother; she’d chosen a ruse that worked. He wondered how she’d planned to carry it off long-term, though. Weren’t candidates’ wives scrutinized? Wouldn’t someone spot the lie?

  Or had the Lisles planned to use their wealth to sort that out?

  What would they do next?

  People like them didn’t let their quarry simply slip away in the night. If he wanted to marry Win, he’d have to keep an eye out for her parents’ next trick and be prepared to fight for her.